Creating Separation

Jeane: This dream takes place in a Western town. It is summer, so there are a lot of people around. A woman has met up with a man and she goes to stay with him at his cabin. It is a rather luxurious one-level cabin. When you walk through the rooms you see Pendleton blankets thrown over a couch or chair; you also have the sense that they go out in town and are caught up in a busy, noisy environments.

The sense is that they are going to pursue their relationship, but it is coming to the end of the season there. Most people will leave. The assumption of the townspeople, and even of the man to some degree, is that she will move into his cabin. Or there is some kind of expectation that he will take care of her to some degree. This is when she speaks to him in private and says that she wants to go to Las Vegas; that she either has lived near there, or she goes there at this time of year.

In his mind he is having his own assumptions about what that would look like. Then she says to him that she wants to be with him, and that she doesn’t really care how the townsfolk see things because she will go along with that while they are at his cabin, but that she has always built her own homes. You have the sense that she will build her own home and if he wants to spend time with her there, fine, or she may live in his cabin sometimes and keep up this illusion that the townsfolk like to have about relationships, but she is just letting him know that it is not like that for her. She has her own ideas of going to Las Vegas and that, wherever she lives, she will probably build her own home. 

John: Your dream begins with a sense of excitement and mystique, with an air about it that is supported by the luxury of the surroundings. But as time progressed, you came to feel that the way things were unfolding – with the living arrangements and the townspeople – was moving through you in a way separate and unique from the overall, so you made efforts to establish your own way. That effort opens something else up as a separate tangent, but ultimately you do not want it to open up separately; you want it to unfold in a connected way.

There is some part of you that believes you have to step out on your own. And to step out on your own, you seek to establish something separate, i.e., your own house. You reach back and relate to the pattern of how you have evolved in the past, and kind of resign yourself to that outplay in this new scenario. You resign yourself to the fate of that separateness.

The thing about it is, you are making it very black and white, with sharp distinctions. For someone on a spiritual journey, it often arises in this way: it’s like schizophrenia to feel that you need to move away from one type of life and toward another. It feels like it demands a sharp separation. I can see how that is, and have wondered about that myself. But I have come to realize that the process is not definable in that way. The process actually is about incorporating all of the characteristics and mannerisms that currently exist, into the new, larger picture.

Anything done in an absolute way makes the mistake of not taking the broader view into account. It screens it out, which can actually become a type of contaminant because it prevents an unfolding into the greater overall. When you step back and include the environment around you, it can be factored into the process and create more of a wholeness.

Often when you get a hint about the way something needs to unfold, there is a masculine characteristic that wants to try and go at it with a certain abandon, meaning, in the case of your dream, to be adamant and separate yourself in your own dwelling. But that kind of righteousness can hurt the results you are trying to achieve. The masculine can justify it by saying that it gets the job done, and sacrifices must be made in order to get the job done. But that is a stiff-arm approach to the process.

And it’s very interesting because whenever a person suddenly catches up with something that is moving inside them and that feels incredible – like a spiritual awakening – that stiff-arm reaction almost cannot be helped. Because a person is suddenly seeing that everything else seems mundane by comparison. So the reaction is to begin to create walls between this and that, to compartmentalize their life. And those walls create veils in terms of the evenness of flow between the ordinary, and what could easily be seen as the extraordinary. The ordinary and extraordinary are meant to be natural elements within a single flow, but that isn’t always perceivable to a mind that tries to put an order and a sequence to things, that tries to establish patterns, and to create a linear path through life.

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