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Archive for June, 2010

John: I like this dream because it’s kind of short and to the point. There may have been a much longer context to it, but there is a particular image in it that was so pronounced that it was sufficient for me to just hold the detail of the image because it was the heart and essence of the dream.

So I am seeing that, for whatever particular reason, I’m having to maintain a type of inner attunement to an overall way. When doing this, I’m acting in a nonspecific way of being, with my attention geared, vibrationally, toward the overall feel of things. So that’s the sense that I carry in this dream.

So my attunement is suddenly disturbed by something in creation. This jostles the container of honey that I am carrying and honey pours out over the edge. Now the typical reaction to this might be shock or anger, but somehow I understand this to be a test to see if I can hold my connection. I see that my attention doesn’t go toward the disturbance, but rather to the honey which, in its overflowing, is a grace, beauty, and heartful lovingness. I see myself using my fingers to scoop up the overflow and put it back into the container. As I lick my fingers from time to time, I become drunk.

It is from this image that I get a hint, and I am able to learn the importance of maintaining the inner connection during times of outer turmoil. Whenever confronted by something that seeks to draw one’s inner attention outwardly, the response should come from a place of greater wholeness. When I notice myself getting reactive, I need to place my overall attention upon the overflowing honey. That then causes my ego reaction to go away. During times of adversity, the honey will always overflow. That’s just the nature of how things are in life. In the limited way in which we live, we don’t perceive it that way. But by maintaining attention on the overflowing honey, what you’re actually doing is flooding the scenario with loving heartfulness.

So, in a sense, this can be seen as a tool or a technique. Because we are life, we are designed to work this way. And what I’m talking about is the exact opposite of what generally occurs whenever there is a reaction set off by something seemingly ignorant of the wholeness. The overflow of honey is grace. To lick the excess off my fingers reinforces the state of drunkenness because everything in the universe is in a state of ecstasy. When you are with it in that state it can be like drunkenness. So when the attention remains heartful, permeating outward, it overwhelms any illusory appearance and its potential to disturb.

There is a story told of a person who gets excited every time he is jostled, excited by each disturbance. In other words, it speaks of a different kind of excitement, one that causes one to go deeper. It is not excitement about the disturbance, but about the opportunity to observe the overflow of honey, so to speak, and to again see that the grace is never affected. It’s as if each event is a reminder that an aliveness exists between creation and the creator, and it is inseparable.

So this is the key. It’s not to look at it as a tool per se, but to see it as a type of union that is inseparable. When you do that, you can have a greater and greater effect upon what’s happening because you’re a part of it, as opposed to limiting or canceling it out from your experience by thinking, “Okay, it’s happening over there to someone else.”

Now you can get to a particular point where everything that’s resonating around you is happening to you because there is no separation, and the idea of no separation is literal from the standpoint of the creator and creation – there is a no separation between them either.  That’s why the grace is always overflowing; that’s why the honey always overflows.

The creator always recognizes the wonderfulness of everything in creation and never pulls the plug – it just showers things and showers things and showers things. So even the suggestion that there is an otherness, or that there is something that could be devoid of this connection seems unimaginable. If there is a oneness, and if everything is connected together, there is a way in which you yourself are everything and you can come to know that as you can come to know the creator through creation.

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Jeane: So, continuing with the dream (see The Conversation), it feels like I’ve gotten to D.’s house and K. is there with her son. I’m in one of those moods where you just have to accept things and let them play out. I’m just glad to see K., but they were all planning to travel somewhere. We start out and I’m still not sure of the relationship between K. and D., who is traveling with the Native American man as I said. It seems like there’s at least one younger boy with us besides K.’s son, who’s older, and when we stop for the night it feels like we’re on this mountain near a plateau that has a series of caves that connect in a circle. K. and her son and I seem to be staying in one cave, and the others, D. and the Native American man, are staying in another cave. Then it seems as though there are some other caves where maybe some boys are staying. It feels like at some point I become aware that there’s someone out there who’s a murderer and he particularly murders young boys. I become aware on some level that it’s probably the Native American man.

John: He’s a murderer?

Jeane: I thought he was an Indian Chief or something, but no, he’s a murderer who has fooled everybody. The men aren’t around right then, so I go out and find a place where they have some guns, and these guns look a little bit more like automatic weapons or rifles or something, so I get two of them and I take them back and give one to K. and her son. She takes the one I’m most familiar with. I have to take the gun I’m not familiar with because she only knows how to operate the other one. I go out and I start searching through the caves to get the boys.  When I enter the cave where the Native American man had been staying I find a very young boy and he might be dead… I can’t seem to rouse him.

John: A young boy was killed?

Jeane: Yes.

John: Where did the young boy come from?

Jeane: He was just traveling with us. There are a few young boys in the caves in the mountain. The caves go in a circle. I go into another cave and someone is covered up under a sheet. I kind of prod at them with the gun because it might be the Native American man, but it’s somebody else I haven’t seen. There’s a cave with a young boy in it who’s okay. I’m just trying to check and rouse anybody and get them all back together in one place. We’ll see if we can find D. or whomever so K. and I have a little more protection or something. Meanwhile, I’m walking around the caves. That’s all I recall of that dream.

John: So this is a really good dream because yesterday we saw your attention establishing how you identify the various parts of yourself; here there is something about K. that’s exciting and refreshing. You put her on a bit of pedestal because it’s a feminine aspect of you that you’re more at ease with. As you go about in life you’re able to relate to her in a more fluid way than with D., who represents a masculine aspect that is still a bit of a mystery – you’re still somewhat out of touch with it. For some reason, that’s what is stirring up this element of fear, or a murder even, that is caught up in the aspect of the young boy, who is also you, an inner part that has a quality of acceptance. In other words, an older man usually is a quality of something ancient and harder to reach. A young boy is a quality that has to do with something that touches you but is repressed from being fully out there on the surface, and we see that it’s being killed or affected by this Indian man who represents the greater whole.

You have now changed the triad to where you aren’t holding onto anything. In other words, you’re forgiving and gracious, you don’t have the judgment you showed in the earlier part toward K., whom you recognize is an overflow of yourself. You do however have a concern that hasn’t sorted itself out regarding the part of you that’s repressed, that has a soft, youthful heartfulness to it. Of course, there’s something in the greater overall that will affect what you try to hold as precious as an inner quality (your idea of a softness, or heartfulness, represented by the young boy).  All of this is connected – understanding that dynamic is connected – to being able to grasp the meaningfulness of the part of yourself called D.

So again this is kind of a complicated dynamic. Everyone has a kind of Rubik’s cube in the way they grasp or understand something. In other words, you’ve taken a dilemma and developed an acuity where you do something quite noble: you’ve separated yourself out so you don’t put any of this trouble on the aspect of you that is K. You recognize that you’re dealing with a state of ignorance that has to do with the more innocent side of yourself (the young boy) and the masculine side of yourself (D.). The natural understanding of these aspects is being affected, being killed so to speak, by the greater wholeness, and this is confusing to you. Where does this leave you with the aspect of you that is D.?

I actually think there’s a pattern unfolding here. The K. aspect came out okay, yet the process was affecting the more sensitive part that you’re guarding inside. When that is killed by the greater wholeness…  I honestly think that the net effect is that D. becomes like K. then, and is an aspect that is accepted as part of the overall.

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Jeane: I had a few dreams. In the first one, it feels like I’m waiting for my friend, K., to come and visit. I haven’t seen her for a long time. She gets really delayed – I mean days or weeks go by and she hasn’t arrived, so I search through my mind and try to figure out what’s happened. I figure out that on the route she was traveling she probably went by where I used to live and met my friend, D., and she is probably staying with him. She may not want to tell me that because she might think that I like D., but that isn’t the issue. The issue is that I know that women really like D., but he is someone who acts like he’s very available but he seems to break up with the woman he’s with about every two years. He’s not really available, he just looks like he is. And how do I tell her that?

So having figured out she’s with him, I decide I should travel there and visit. So I go there and she also has a son, who is older. It seems like she’s there, but I can’t tell if she is staying with D. or if she’s staying separately from him. I’m not quite 100% sure of their relationship. I want to be kind of diplomatic and find a way… I mean you can’t really tell a person that someone they like is not available when they look like they are. It’s one of those hard things.

So I’m thinking about all that and then it seems like we all have to travel somewhere and D. is traveling with this older Native American man.

John: So far what you’re indicating is that you’re going through a psychological process of telling yourself that nothing is permanent, and that whatever you feel and experience at any depth inside you can only exist for a certain period of time. Somehow or other you have this inner belief that this is how it is in life, and it’s probably based on your understanding of how things seem to reflect externally. Of course, if you look at the outer world as a place of continuous disturbance or, as some would say, even a place of general suffering, then whatever identification you have will always get turned on its ear at some point in time, so in that sense, things that exist outwardly, that have no connection to the inner essence, will always come to an end at some point in time.

What’s so peculiar about the dream is that D. is really an aspect of you, and yet, you’re waiting for something about that aspect to become more enhanced, i.e., more ready for a certain commitment.

And the part of you represented by K. is trying to hide from you, so to speak, as it seems to be able to disenfranchise the D. part of yourself, which is an even deeper essence part of you. You feel a responsibility to point out that none of this can go anywhere, and by taking and maintaining this kind of mannerism between the three of you (triad), you believe you can somehow keep yourself from being hurt because you’re being rational, and you’re showing common sense, and you’re making an observance that has stood the test of time for you in terms of how the inner energies reflect into outer consequences.

All of this begs an even bigger question, because this way of seeing in you will always project this kind of consequence or outcome. So is there some part of you that doesn’t carry what is almost a kind of jinx in terms of perspective? The essence connection inside of you isn’t really alive if it can vary and change over time. It’s not really a part of your beingness if it is like that. That is too disjointed for an essence connection, which is something deeper and permeates through. That’s the nature of an essence, it has a permanence that can always be connected to or with.

So this dream shows you having a conversation with yourself about all these areas where you still carry an involvement, and the involvement brings with it aspects of fear, aspects of attachment, aspects of identity, and qualities or characteristics of a state of beingness. And this conversation understands that these involvements need to fall away for you to solidify your deeper connection to essence. It is the essence that will remain, ultimately, after everything else has fallen away and you stop projecting your life from your less permanent places.

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