Jeane: As I drifted back to sleep I was remembering that I can’t eat until I see the doctor. Anyway, I am with you, it’s morning. We are living in a dingy place. I hear this odd sound and you have gotten up and gone into the other room.
I get up and go into a helix formed by the hallway and kitchen, and you have gone off into your office. I thought you had gotten up to heat up some oatmeal, but instead you have gone into a hallway area where there seems to be a stove that is hardly ever used right next to the washing machine and dryer.
You started cooking some scrambled eggs. This strange stove has an area under it where I feel it could catch fire because it looks like it has a rat’s nest in there. On top of the stove there is something kind of odd in the pan with the scrambled eggs, which you have walked off and left cooking.
I am surprised that you are cooking the eggs instead of just having oatmeal, and I’m also surprised that you have walked off. The stove is making this really weird sound. I am now worried about fire and the strange sound it is making, somewhat like a washing machine. I am looking for you to come back to the room to see all these strange goings-on.
John: So this second scene is similar to the first scene (see The Paradox), in that you are making a distinction between what is more dense – more based in outer life – and something that has a less dense, more inner quality to it. The image shows things happening in the hallway – an in-between place. There is a stove where there shouldn’t be, and there are eggs being scrambled, like the scene itself where normal things are scrambled up. It’s showing a level of confusion in terms of what you are trying to deal with.
But you yourself are not part of the process; I have walked away, but I am scrambling the eggs in the hallway. You are just looking around trying to sort it all out. In a way, you have shut yourself off from the process while it churns away.
Even the stove isn’t acting like a stove – it makes a sound like a washing machine because I have abandoned it. It is drawing your attention to it and you are purging yourself because you are not supposed to eat. It all looks like another struggle to me.
Something is trying to open up for you, but instead you are mired in the confusion of the dense, outer world. But the sound from the stove is attracting your attention, which is like your listening center knowing that there is something beyond this density that you are trying to connect to. But in this particular case, the weight of the density of things is winning out. You may be holding on to a thread behind the density that is flickering around you, but still you are unable to get out of the mire.
The interesting thing about how this works is that the confusion of the outer that you are experiencing can be noted by you, or cataloged even, but should then be let go. In that way you release it into the universe, allowing the universe to reveal its answers to you.
But if you hold tight to the confusion, meaning your reaction to it is to get involved or set it right through the imagery, you cut yourself off from the inner guidance. In other words, an initial reaction might be to try and make all the oddness and confusion “work” more normally. But that reaction mires you in its density.
Instead, if you just observe it but don’t get personally involved in it, you can receive the flow that comes from the inner that is there to help you. You should be there with “soft hands,” a tamed ego, and a mind that is quieted. You don’t want your inner dialogue to be noisy with fixing the dense energy because then you can’t hear the subtleness of the inner.
The inner is trying. It is the nature of the outer to set off a dynamic in your dreams that churns away at you and agitates you in some fashion. It creates expectations and conditions that you feel that you have to react to. But when you start to react, you sacrifice clarity and your consciousness slows down. Then you are more apt to get consumed in the darkness and are more apt to forget the clarity and the inner qualities of guidance that you carry.
You need to know that this is not something that you get rid of, either. You just take it in terms of its relationship, which is mind-ego, and you have to tame it, and you have to move first of all into mind-spirit. The mind-spirit is a little lift off the ground because of the awakened spirit energy. That’s when you get the sense that this process is a step on a journey.