Full of Myself

John: My dream dealt with similar themes as yours (see The Dance of Life), but instead of it being a literal dream, it was more a repetition of images that had a simplistic nature about them.

The simple images were ones that felt controllable in terms of how I would like to see them unfold, yet at the same time they felt incomplete. I was always getting a barrage of images that had more going on in them – they were multidimensional – and they kept me off balance.

The simple images had to do with my personal well being, and making choices; they felt good. The more complex ones led to a greater outcome – they actually took into account the past, present, and future of Creation all at the same time. They are more about the core of things than the details of things.

What I’m saying is that if I’m allowed to shape the outcome (of the simple images) so that they make sense to me, in order to keep from confusing and complicating my life, that’s when I fail to appreciate the fullness of existence, and I remain unaware of what is unfolding.

Said another way, I’m only looking at what I want to look at, instead of seeing all that is going on. I’m not allowing other aspects to have their importance. I’m trying to steer things according to what I want and think feels right.

The more complex images have all kinds of possibilities going on simultaneously. I haven’t filtered them by my personal choices. These images have complexity and combinations that aren’t defining or screening things out – they take everything into account and portray life more as it actually is.

So the images that portray what I want to believe or see are personally chosen by me, and are limited by the veils of my own defense mechanisms. Those veils allow me to feel safer, more protected, less confused, and more at ease with everything, but I’m giving up the big picture. In doing so, I lose the ability to function on other levels, i.e., I’m not able to see the signs of God (so to speak) that provide me with information about these other levels and the whole, simultaneously.

If I limit myself to my own perspective, it’s like drinking my own Kool-Aid – I’ll never really know what’s going on. It’s drinking from a cup that’s full of myself. To expand out of myself, and to access these other levels, is to accept the flow in all of life, a flow that leads to a greater perception of the whole.

A human being isn’t able to know what’s going on when they’re caught in personal perspectives, because those perspectives are just images that we shape to fit our expectations – they stifle the natural processes of life.

Our veils can only be removed when we accept everything in life. The world is like a great painting – the surface may seem flat, yet there is a much larger experience available to us when we explore the hidden depths within.

When we only see what we want to see, we deafen ourselves to the call of the greater process in which we exist. We foolishly do this because we don’t have a real understanding of our wholeness. If we did, we could push right through the veils and begin to drop the defense mechanisms and personal barriers that we think are so important.

This was a hard dream to write up.

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