John: In considering yesterday’s dreams (see Delayed En Route), the part of the imagery where you are running around trying to get coffee and take a shower shows you to be in a state of amnesia. You’re trying to catch up with a certain note, or a way of feeling in oneself, that has to do with being in sync or in a natural flow, but you’re not quite able to do that.
In your outer reality (waking life) you do plan to meet with this specific friend, and you are trying to find an alignment in yourself that you think fits that future event.
But there’s more to the issue than just that, because everything that’s going on around you, that’s causing the delays and confusion, is a veil that is keeping you from being able to accomplish what you have set out to do. And getting coffee and taking a shower seem simple enough to accomplish.
However, because of the way you’re feeling inside, it shows that these impediments have something to do with an aspect of you that is repressed – it’s not emerging, so you’re unable to catch up with it. Therefore, there isn’t a natural flow to your actions. The “design” that you have before you is simply to get together with a friend.
At the end of the dream you discover why it is that you’re unable to do this simple work: you have blocked a memory that is related to who you really are in terms of being rooted in your nature; there has been a traumatic event that has affected you.
So, in a roundabout way, what you do by bringing up this traumatic image is you provide yourself a reason, or excuse, for not being able to get your act together. You are holding back, or suppressing, something deep inside that is acting as a barrier. The result is that you’re unable to bring through a natural flow because this barrier aspect is dictating a vibration, or note, that has to unfold itself in Creation.
You know something is amiss. And that’s why every impulse and every desire is a tricky thing. In the pure depth of you, you know what you need to do, and how it needs to be done. That’s why you bring it into the Creation level of yourself, which is the design level, where you can allow a revelation to unfold.
Yet if you have a tangential mannerism in your nature – something repressed that delays you on your journey – you’re not able to catch up with the pure depth of yourself, which is the best way of doing the work of letting go.
You always know something is amiss in a dream when something doesn’t quite come together, or you have to confront barrier after barrier. It’s like that too, in terms of a waking life. At the design level, you can create something in terms of an inner ideal, but when you try to bring it down into life, that’s when you find out if it is meant to be, or is meant to take place.
The design may seem good on an inner level, or on a thought level, when first conceived, but when you bring it down into life to test it, it’s as if that is the place where you work out your karma and such, that’s when you find out to what degree it’s properly attuned or not.
Ultimately, however, you’re lucky. You’re shown, before the dream ends, that you have this repressed memory that something has happened that’s caused you to go off on a tangent and that’s why you have an excuse for not being able to hear what you need to hear, and be the way you need to be in terms of the natural flow.
If you can be in the natural flow, without the vibration of the trauma sending you off on a detour -if you can clear that out and get closer to your naturalness – you would be able to do what you’re meant to do, and able to live how you’re meant to live.
So this dream is bringing to your attention the knowledge that you carry things inside you that rise up. What arises may seem fresh and original, but are they coming up from a divine impulse, or are they coming up from something in your nature that is a barrier to, or contaminating, the natural flow?
The inner patterns of reaction that we create around traumatic events in our lives can prevent us from catching up with them – we keep them repressed and that causes us to go around and around in confusion and delay because we fail to find the right note.
Therefore, in this imagery, you are not able to do the right work. The best way of catching up with what you need to do is to use the outer world to realize and recognize when something is coming together and flowing, or not coming together – to recognize when there is resistance.
There is always a reason when something is amiss, or is resisted, in some way or doesn’t flow. Then you take that into the heart and back yourself up to the energetic that no longer needs to be there. That energetic is what is contaminating the pure inflection, or the natural flow.