Broken in Two

Jeane: I had a dream where I visit a woman and her two children. They live out in the country. Usually she doesn’t let her kids have pets, but I bring a little kitten. Of course, that makes her son and daughter want to have animals, too. When I leave, I leave the kitten there.

When I come back to visit I see that what started with the kitten has morphed into lots of animals being there. She has a giraffe and other animals. She brings out a tiny little white animal. It fits in the palm of my hand. It’s not a kitten or a puppy, it’s some other little creature. I play with it for a few minutes and give it back to her.

Then I seem to go sit down at a table; I want to see how her kids are doing. Well, her kids weren’t very good students, but her daughter is making it in college. I think her son dropped out. He lives in one of those houses that looks like the local junkyard, but he’s having fun with it. He does things with metal.

I visit the son’s house and find a man there who jumps into the pool and floats on top of the water, even though he’s wearing some kind of metal jacket. He has to weigh himself down and go across the pool and do something underwater. That’s all I can remember.

John: In this dream, you’re trying to look at two different aspects of you, feminine and masculine. One part is gaining a sense of various energetics and you’re noticing, for example, the nature of a kitten and how it has a certain freedom that breaks things open and adds a certain soothing element to life. That’s introduced in terms of a recognition, and it’s a feminine orientation.

Then as you get this thing going, you introduce all of these other animals. So you’ve quickly incorporated that feminine orientation, which tends to have a bit of an overall effect in life.

But, does it work with the clarity of things, too, which is the masculine aspect?

In other words, there’s a nice flow in the outer from a recognition of how things are, energetically, but what about the aspect of energy that comes down, in, and through, and touches things, i.e., the masculine, as represented by the son and the man in the pool? That energy is still deemed as somewhat aloof, or floating. You haven’t quite grounded it.

You see that the development you’re under is giving you an ability to cope (the expansion to many animals), which is likable in your nature and in your being. However, in recognizing this aspect, it becomes something which you tend to lean on. You find it satisfactory; it gets you by.

But what about this other part that seems to still be weighed down? That’s the part that floats with these ideas, even though it doesn’t make sense that it can float. It sits in an overall pool of things; it’s not rooted in its ideas and mannerisms, which you’ve kind of rejected because “it’s not the brightest thing,” in your opinion.

As a consequence, you actually see yourself in this dream as having only found a means to get by. You’re not really thriving because that floating part, that masculine orientation, doesn’t quite fit or connect, or isn’t quite acceptable.

A dream like this shows that you still have an opinion or a belief or a mannerism about how you maintain a certain spatiality of things (the feminine). That’s okay, and works with a lot of different aspects of flow and energy (all the animals), but it doesn’t necessarily link to, or maintain a link to, the truly creative aspect, which the masculine carries through. And it’s because the masculine is seen by you as not being too with it, while also being weighed down by the peculiarities of itself and trying to stay afloat.

In other words, you’re trying to float this part of yourself, still with its heavy, protective armor. So you’ve figured out how to cope with it, but you haven’t yet included it or brought it into yourself.

If you don’t figure out how to bring that half in so it facilitates the other half, you can’t really lose yourself in the spiritual sense. You can have a good life or a decent life, an acceptable pattern or mannerism, but a distance will always exist in terms of how you see the one aspect of things versus the other.

This tends to be a dilemma for anyone who gets caught up in the idea of bringing about change in life only from the feminine way of doing things (as a reaction to masculine dominance historically). This is not a dream that I’d expect you to have, but apparently you have developed a certain understanding that works for you, and have come to be satisfied with that in a way that doesn’t rock the boat.

In other words, you’re able to defer having to deal with certain inner, masculine mannerisms, and that ultimately doesn’t work in life. If you look at examples in history where the feminine has subordinated her balance in relationship to the masculine, she shrinks the space she holds inside her. The problem, then, is that she only takes on the responsibility that she’s comfortable with, and lets everything else ride.

But that doesn’t really work either. What ends up happening is things will go along in a certain way, but you can’t and won’t end up with a wholeness. You’ll end up with something that strikes a balance in relationship to the two, but it’s an incompleteness because you’ve broken them in two.

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