Jeane’s feelings of alienation continue in today’s dream, but here we see that those feelings trigger a journey to incorporate, harmoniously, the masculine and feminine aspects within, yet also give us a glimpse of the greater dance of the universal gender energies. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
Jeane: My dreams last night appeared to have been affected by two things. One is that for the last couple of days I’ve been fighting off either a sinus infection, or a little sore throat, and it’s kind of aggravated by being in hotels all the time, and by the fact I watched Avatar again last night.
So in my dream, it feels like I’m in a society where I’m beginning to help with things but I’m actually an alien, or they’re aliens, and we’re trying to integrate in a way so that what that does is that when I do things it’s always making my body hurt. Like I’m trying to do a process that actually is like participating in something ordinary, or moving something through the body, but there’s always what should feel good at some point right now hurts because it’s an alien energy I’m working with, or I’m an alien. It’s very hard to tell which.
So whatever I sweep through, even though I know that there are points when it can feel good, and there are times when I can get it to feel good frequently, it actually feels off, or painful, because it’s still alien and then that kind of shifts into another dream.
John: You’re basically in this dream just denoting how things are still floating about in terms of the aspects of outer world and inner world kind of being quickened a little bit. Outer world affects still has its influence, and the double talk of your dream is that aspect, that you would consider alien, is actually more of the movement inside of something on the inner level awakening.
Jeane: So the dream this goes into, I’m about 17 or 18, and I’ve fallen in love with someone but it’s like his family wants to separate us. He’s gotten a scholarship to go to France for a year.
I can also travel to France but of course we won’t travel together. And I know his mother kind of feels that this will break us up if he has to actually be in France for a year, and in terms of traveling there it feels like the first night that I take off for France we just go to a camp maybe or an area – a whole bunch of us are traveling – where people have cabins in areas but I hadn’t made reservations before I got there.
Now as I look around, the cabins I might have been able to access, because they belonged to someone I knew, were always either full of kids that were there playing or going to spend the night, or the people weren’t there so I didn’t have a key to them. All the other places have kind of filled up, and so I’m looking around and I’ve even talked to someone who’s running the place and I can see she’s totally overwhelmed with leading all these people that have suddenly showed up into the few spaces she knows, and she doesn’t really know me or my family like somebody who’d been there longer.
As I look around I go back to where I kind of started out at this camp and I realize that there were two of us that were kind of sitting on a bed and I have a sleeping bag and I thought well maybe that will just be the sleeping arrangement rather than actually having your own bed and everything.
About the time that I finally decide where I can sleep even though it won’t really be a private room or anything like I’d initially imagined, then I suddenly find myself in a room that he has there and it’s a room with two beds because his mother will sleep there, but she’s out of the room right now.
So I’m kind of laying halfway across the top of his bed, he’s holding me, and I didn’t know it but he takes this drug and it’s almost interesting. It’s a drug that looks almost like this golden powder and he takes about a… oh, I don’t know, like an eraser size part of it, you know, the tip of an eraser on a pencil, and he sniffs this golden powder and then it leaves all these little golden flakes on his face.
I think the powder must act almost like cocaine, in my mind, because of the way he relates to it, and then he’s got these flecks on his face that I feel like I brush against as I go to kiss him. And then he holds me and we just have the longest kiss. And this kiss is going on forever and it’s very deep and very like penetrating, and in the back of my mind is a thought that his mother might come into the room so everything has to be held kind of as it is, but it’s like a way in which he is holding me is just so intimate, and the energy is so intense, that that just goes on forever until I wake up.
John: So what is happening is, the mother aspect represents the depth that exists in terms of the huge quality and mannerism of creation, or basically that which is in the outer. But it is something in the outer that has mothered or developed a connection and a linkage to a son, that reflects the ether or source of things, or has a connection to that, to which the mother principle tends to hide that or safeguard that.
This actually exists like this. This energetic kind of exists like this, and that somehow or another you have a proximity to him that is more than you actually realize. In other words, it’s like you go to another place, but as you go to another place you see all these parts, but still somehow laying behind all of these parts or components or other people is something that is intangibly linked.
He can never get far from the mother quality inside, because the mother quality is the overallness of a beingness in the outer. And because of the depths of that mother quality, he then accesses things, and has accessed things, that come in a tremendous corresponding capacity from somewhere else. In other words, the heightened masculine wisdom.
However, where the paradox exists is you have the inflection, and you have the reflection, what reflects. The way this principle tends to work in a ordinary setting, because what you’re describing is a setting of a wholeness, but in an ordinary setting the way it tends to work is something comes down and through as a masculine energy, sets something up that sparkles and awakens from the feminine in terms of the feminine being complete but not knowing it.
And that’s what creates the cycle of something awakening. In this particular instance, what is happening is he carries this connection to the stars, to the twinkle of things, the sparkle, the gold dust on his face.
Usually where the paradox exists is usually at best you see this as a sparkle or a twinkle of the feminine that is awakened by things, whether they are good, bad, or otherwise, that just stir something so that something awakens in terms of the feminine, and that creates the legitimacy of the masculine.
In this particular case the wholeness is there. The mother is the Great Mother of all of life, and he is the prodigal son that’s connected to this that comes down and through, in terms of everything in life, in which you are in relationship to all of this, is you are, so to speak, the other half now. Instead of being the mother protecting the son, you’re the son coming out and finding the likeness of the mother.
In other words, it’s hard to say but you’re kind of like a shadow of the energy. In other words, what the mother is holding onto, protecting and safeguarding, he of course is protecting and safeguarding the security of something as a transmitted flow.
The two function, except she is the Great Mother of creation, and he is linked with the wisdom and the sight of the ethers, the stars, the gold dust that sparkles, and you are something that is evolving to be able to be in the sphere of that sort of thing. And from the standpoint of the Great Mother, you’re never going to cut the grade. But from his standpoint, there’s something about you in which he can take and create this huge transmission that comes all the way through and that is just basically how the greater expansive overallness works.
That which is the mother is one thing, and it is set, it is complete and set and whole, and that which is him, is the counter reflection of that in terms of the connection to the other side. And then that which is you in there is the animation of the aliveness that incorporates it all in a quickening. It’s like a reawakening and a quickening.
And so it’s an image in which you are never going to, in a way, until you become the Great Mother yourself, be up to snuff. And he will never ever be a person that’s away from the effect and the influence of the Great Mother because somehow or another that too corresponds to his depth.
So you’re the change agent, you’re the activation point in this whole equation, that causes something to be able to be shifted, to be made anew, and that whole thing, that’s kind of like the underlying dynamic that’s going on, that just is, and how do you make sense out of it? How do you describe what it’s about and why it’s needed or where it goes?
It’s just this other little dynamic that’s the byproduct of all of this, so to speak, cosmic action of which the Great Mother is creation and he is the linkage to that which comes from somewhere else. It’s an amazing dream isn’t it?
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