The masculine perspective, in dreams, often deals with the smaller details of situations, compared to the feminine perspective, which often relates to the overall nature of a situation. Here, John has an image involving changing trains, yet in making this inner shift, he finds himself disconnecting from the flow.
(At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
John: We are kind of on a theme in which even the dreams that we’ve had before have led us up to kind of like this point of unfoldment, in which there is a captivation to the essence that lies behind what is normally just a projection.
And for most people it still remains just a projection to which they identify within an outer context, but for me there are particularities that may now seek, to access or reach, in order to come to grips with this inner meaningfulness.
And in your dream (see The Big Fish), you’re shown it in a general context, and in the general context you’re seeing how you’re doing in relationship to the expansive wholeness that you are meant to catch up with and embody. And in your dream what you’re seeing isn’t yet complete. It’s formative.
That’s best portrayed by the final image, but even in the images leading to the final image, it’s the final image is the clearest because I have the familiarity to what a fish means, and over and over again it seems to have this universal symbolism of a consciousness, or an awakening.
And so you can take the fish that you see, okay here comes the consciousness symbolism, and how that symbolism looks or comes across in terms of you. And you can see the surprise and the shock of you noting that, and then appreciating that in relationship to finding it behind, or within, the essence, as an essence to what is ordinarily just a reflective image. And yet there it is as something more significant to come to grips with or to just take in. Your dream has that whole outer context.
In my case, I’m trying to deal with the inner. I have to address little things that keep me from quite getting it, or from staying in sync with it, which again is the more masculine nature – the particularities. You have the generalness of the overallness, and I have like a particularity to the same subject.
This dream begins with me seeking to be a person who gets off a train and onto another train, because the train I had been on, which provided a nice casual ride, now something has shifted in which the next train has particular other qualities that I have to take more responsibility for, and I have to access directly.
And I have a whole sense of that, but that doesn’t mean that I have the stability and balance for it to happen. And so what happens is I see myself move up to where the door is, and before it is announced where it’s perfectly safe to get off, or everyone can now leave, it’s kind of like you have in an airplane where you’re not supposed to get out of your seat until something gives you the notice that you can do so, or otherwise you’re being rude or inappropriate to the way something is supposed to unfold.
Well, that’s kind of what’s going on here is that I’ve moved up to the door before it’s timely, and then I even push through the door to try to get an edge in terms of finding a seat on the next train and, in doing so, I don’t realize that I am out of sync with the flow, and a naturalness from within.
On this train there are seats that connect you to kind of an inner unfoldment as you ride. Once one gets off on a tangent like that, even though I have a sense of what it is that I need to recognize, I can’t find them. I can’t identify them.
And yet here I am jumping on this train early. It’s as if somehow there are others that have gotten still ahead of me in some capacity, or if I do see seats, I’m continuously looking for something that’s in a different rail car, or something that’s better, or more succinct. And I end up finding myself in this condition, or state, or mood, or mannerism, that I’m carrying, which has gotten exasperated, and not found a seat at all.
The reason for a dream like this is to show that in one capacity or way inside of myself I am able to recognize how there is kind of an interesting way that something unfolds, and that you can connect with that and be fed by that.
But then at the same time, when you get to indulging in the importance of that, as if you have something to say about that or need to adopt a higher degree of control or peculiarity in relationship to the unfoldment, as if there are things in the outer that can get in the way, and so now you’re taking what had been perfectly fine as an inner essence and now putting a seriousness spin on it in terms of outer reflections.
What this does is this throws you off. It throws you kind of on a tangent. And once you get on this tangent, you don’t shake it. And you project this tangent upon other people. And you could sit there and deep down in some state you can know that this is how you would have liked to have done it, and wanted to feel, but you can’t because you went off on an indulgence instead of just staying in the inner flow.
So as a consequence you’re now communicating that reflective imbalance, and if you really look at it it feels horrible, but also at the same time it’s a type of clutchiness. It’s a type of grabbing. This is what tends to cause this sort of thing to suddenly pop up.
You can know the flow. You know that it’s there but you could be repeating over and over again, that the fact that you’re acting out a reflective mannerism – as if it can affect or do something to the inner flow – instead of being in a state in which there is an emptiness and a letting go feeling that has this auric trust and wholeness from which whatever unfolds is what is meant to be.
As opposed to suddenly getting to the point where you catch up with the fact that there was the flow, like this other train, and then now all of a sudden you have to take on a more engaged relationship to that because you have caught the flow, and now you’re in a reflective outer, and now you’re trying to put two and two together.
And when you function like that, that is when you start to become disoriented. That’s when you’re blinking, as if the outer actually has a consequence over the inner – and it never does. It’s you trying to take and do a deviation as if that’s important; taking something and drawing out of it that which isn’t there, imagining that which isn’t there, glowing too much in outer circumstances and having reactions according to those outer circumstances – inside.
And then eventually getting to a point where whatever those reactions are rub off on you, and so you emote that. You hate the fact that you’re emoting that, but you can’t stop yourself. This actually then keeps you from being in tune with that essence that you can just be flowing with, and feeling, and carrying, and transmitting, and watching it from a withinness, do its creative magic or creative thing. The degree to which you carry some imbued trait of tangentiality is the degree to which you compromise that. And it feels horrible, but you do it.
I wrote up a kind of meaning to it that might help too, because it’s a dream about indulging: to do so is to kill the magic and to get in the way of the natural flow. I’ve been fortunate to have been on a train that got me to this point with a flow that I was able to enjoy. Now I am shifted as a next step to a new train.
I carry an energetic entitlement. I’ve taken on this energetic entitlement that has me imposing myself without the composure and graciousness I know is imperative to my wellbeing. To do so doesn’t work, because while you’ve taken on this awkwardness – it is not about me. Yet you’re somehow making it more like you have a piece of the action or something. I will not find the inner into outer connection if I violate the natural inner trust that acts from, and for, a natural inner knowingness.
What the dream is doing is causing me to see how my raciness keeps the natural linkage and flow from unfolding, and takes me away from the inner into outer recognition I need to be abiding in.
Of course as a scenario you could say that I find myself in a state of subtle desperation, and in doing so I lack the usual graciousness I normally carry in my aura. And once you get off like that you tend to stay off and be on a spin, which is away from the inner path. You then, in terms of reflections, reflect that as a denseness, instead of the inner quality that keeps things joyful around you and happening.
And I was unnaturally sharp with people. You get a unnaturally sharp with people, which isn’t one’s actual nature but depicts and points out that you have allowed this raciness vibe, or something that’s pressing you, to take that on as if that is actually real.
And then that vibe gets imbued into things and causes a loss to occur, which becomes a blockage, or a veil, or an attitude that stands between the inner flow, with the appreciation and naturalness, which is imperative in this phased way of compressing to seeing the inner flow in its importance.
Before I just needed to be on the train, now I’m required to hear this a little more succinctly, trust in its meaningfulness, and take care to not get off on the wrong foot and end up imposing an outer pattern. For me to be who I am meant to be, I must remain attentive to the natural inner unfoldment.
To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: Killing the Magic