Yesterday, in A False Sense of Euphoria, John experienced the fear of “losing oneself” in the expansiveness of a greater energetic. In this dream, from the same night, an open door can’t be closed. Through this image he takes the next step, recognizing that his fear must be let go of, and the greater expanse embraced. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
John: What does this mean? What does this mean for me? I have another dream that basically describes that.
I’m in a very, very deep sleep and I find that I’m in the attic area of a house. I’m sleeping up there. And I wake up and there’s a door, onto what is like a deck, which is not properly closed.
I’m kind of shocked because what if the wind had come up? It could have damaged things. The door could have flopped back and forth, and I would have been asleep and wouldn’t even have noticed that it was happening.
And so I’m able to pull the door closed, but it’s kind of a split-level door. In other words, the bottom part will swing and the top part will swing. Well, the top part has lever window things that open up, so I close the bottom part, and then the top part I’ve got to work on that because it has the lever things that open up like two windows, that swing open side to side. And I’m doing my best to try to close this as much as I can, I can’t seem to get it closed.
I have a certain fear that comes up. Did someone I don’t know somehow do this to me, when I wasn’t paying attention? Because it wasn’t like this when I went to bed, as far as I know. I have this scary thought: did a stranger pass through here or something?
I’m almost leery because this door that swings open there is a little deck out there. I’ve never been out on this deck, and I hate to even peek out there for fear that maybe somebody is trying to hide there or something. If I just close it, the heck with them.
As I’m peeking around out on this deck I notice that the prior owner, before I came here, has left some plants out there and I’m surprised they’re still alive. I mean, there are some weeds growing up in the pots with them, but the plants are basically alive. They got enough water somehow.
I still won’t totally look about because I keep trying to close the window, because something about that seems like it’s too much for me. And in trying to close the window, my hand touches kind of a guy line, and I start pulling on this guy line and some papers come stringing down this line and they have the date 1998 on them and the name of the prior owner of this place.
What these papers are about is they are the results of a medical life scan, and I’m wondering about that because this is what I’m planning to do. This guy is no longer alive. I’m hoping that such a discovery doesn’t bode something ominous for me.
The fact that this guy, this previous owner, did this is – what a coincidence! It didn’t seem to help him, in spite of how he groomed things on the upper deck, a place that is open, and I’m having trouble closing it off and I’m fearful to overly probe.
This has a very deep meaning in terms of this whole other context. The expansive aura in my nature, going back to the beginning part of the dreams, has me concerned that this is the precursor to a losing of myself.
This is the fear, or the thing that came up from the previous: you’re top heavy, overly expansive, you could lose yourself, you’re set up for a fall. And again, as we discussed in your dream, that’s actually, in terms of the point, if you’re not able to carry that, and usually that’s carried unconsciously, that’s the interval where the in-breath turns to the out-breath.
It is way beyond, out of creation in a way. It’s at a home somewhere else. You might say that expansiveness inside of me, the door and window, are open and I’m unable to at least close the window.
I can protect myself to a certain degree of the stuff coming in and out and in and out, but I can’t close the window no matter how hard I try. In this greater overallness there’s an area I haven’t explored, and I’m leery about what I might find there.
And with good reason if I take it too literally, because the last person to go there is no longer around. So I’m pondering the overall health of this sudden over expansiveness, and what it means to where I am proceeding now, now that I have reached this point, and my concept that this may not be safe.
That’s my concept. I have had this concept as a concept, and in the previous dream, and in my experience, whenever you get too expansive, watch out. But the potted plants out there on this balcony suggest that there is more to the place for me to appreciate. I will have to get out of my posturing to take this in. I’ll have to let go of my fear that there’s something about this expansiveness that doesn’t bode well.
In other words, as a deeper meaning, this is a correction dream to the warning dream. I’m not able to turn back from what I have opened up, and will need to figure out how to carry this state of being.
In other words, I’m going to have to be more expansive. It’s what is called for in terms of my development. I no longer can go along and be reacting to things in the usual way. I just suddenly have to take on this other greater flare in my being that is there.
And it’s a sort of thing I’ve been leery of. In Sufi thought, it’s often when you get into the discussion that there’s the pain of love, where you keep things in a certain contracted way so that you don’t get too top heavy or carried away. And so you deal more with the depths of yourself.
And then there’s the joy of love, which is the expansive state, and there comes a point where you have to do that, or otherwise you’re trying to maintain a certain mannerism as a means to your consciousness.
This is a dream that shows you how you need to be able, on another shift inside of you, in terms of taking on the greater expanse, you need to quit the mannerism of these boundary controls. That’s more of a physical orientation.
Your soul in and of itself doesn’t need boundary controls. It’s only the physical impressions or identity that get in the way. So you have to go beyond that, you have to live both but you have to know how to go beyond those signals from the animalistic side of one’s nature, so to speak, or from the element of that which is kind of alive in the outer, even though it dies when the body dies.
You have to supersede that in order to take on the greater depth of the overallness that’s your naturalness to your soul. And until you do that, your soul can’t go home. Your soul stays bound in some fashion. It can’t take on the greater dimensions of its overallness, of its wholeness.
In other words, it can’t then properly appreciate that interval where the in-breath turns to the out-breath. Instead, it is more inclined to indulge in waking something up in the microcosm, by the longing, in terms of the spark that comes through, and things get stirred up, and then you have the commotion of emotion and all of that going on, at the same time as the out-breath touches the in-breath.
And you use that to noodle along in terms of opening up your awareness. Ultimately, the much bigger shift is what is seeable and visible where the in-breath goes to its home, or is in that interval before it turns to the out-breath. That’s the greater dimension of things, and it’s very, very scary. It’s not something that we have much comfort in because our attention is placed so much to our senses, and our sense of physical well being, yet this is the greater dimension.
To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: The Greater Dimension
