Compelled From Within

pineal glandIn this imagery, John describes the sense within that compels a human being on a journey back to God. We all have this urging within us. It may be quiet or loud, yet it is there for us to hear and respond to. That is the natural process of a human journey, yet in these current times few hear the call. It requires that we listen to our inner voice, rather than drown it out with the busyness of the physical world. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: The masculine approaches it as if it’s following a thread to get there, and as long as it chooses not to go a particular way based upon an opinion, or a predilection, or an attitude, or a mood, or a conceptualization, it only is able to perceive so far. In other words, things can stay out of reach.

So the masculine is always kind of carrying the sensation of something that is more, if it is truly following a thread of something compelled from within, that’s drawing it from within. Again, it’s like a type of gravity, or magnetism or something, which can cause a person to keep probing, or seeking, or reaching, even if that’s a probing a seeking and a reaching that is, as one is doing it, outside of their means. 

That’s how the masculine energy vibration tends to feel itself. The seed thought of it was implanted in my meditation, and then I had a dream that laid it out with greater rhythm or smoothness.

In the meditation, when I started meditating at 11:00pm, I kept thinking the meditation desirably should end at midnight. And yet by midnight, how is it possible for me to get to this other side? So what I did is I set up a type of stigma, in which up to midnight represented a barrier, and then after midnight could be a new threshold.

And so I meditated until after 1:00am, and when I came out of it after 1:00am it was like I carried a sense of limitation that then, somehow or another, transcended to somewhere else. And yet I had the sensation inside that that limitation was there and was imposed, so to speak, by a way of seeing myself, when I sat down in the meditation, so that what occurred, in terms of where I ended up traveling, was more of a beyond of the beyond.

And yet I experienced it, and I knew that I experienced it, but I also felt that somehow or another I was not able to write it down, like you write down a dream in its detailed sense, because I had gone into the meditation embodying and carrying this limitation, so that when it went away maybe some shadow of that still continued in some fashion, so that what was revealed to me was easily compromised by the shock or the being taken by such a state of unawares that it couldn’t come flushing blatantly through.

However, I could feel it in the bones. I could feel that it happened. I could look back and carry the sensation that it happened and know that something had happened, but in terms of my right to behold it point blank, so to speak, as a loudness like a dream, I was somewhat refrained.

It was more caught in the etheric, as a vibration, because I held onto some question or doubt or mannerism that didn’t quite fully get flushed out. It’s interesting how that works in terms of keeping one from accessing a really, really, really deep center inside of themselves. 

So that was like kind of the seed thing, and so as a meaning of that I kind of wrote: So something important, in order to get addressed from within, even though I am pressed to understand this in terms of how it is in manifestation, because I have my limitation sense, I am pressed to understand it, and then I notice that often there is a sense or inflection that affects the semblance of things in terms of the degree in which a person is capable of taking in an image – and that again is the self-limitation I imposed on myself.

And if you can take it as real, in other words see it as it is meant to be seen, then deep inside you remember something that you wouldn’t normally remember because you had removed yourself from that memory and you had taken some density on instead, and then when that is there it can be kind of loud and clear, or otherwise what you catch up with is kind of a tingly sensation to something more. That’s kind of like the seed thought of the meditation, took me up to something like that.

My dreams actually caused me to then travel, if I can somehow or another break a veil.

And so then in my dream, as if to show me that what I sought was possible, I traveled through an area, carried by an energy that I felt could only take me so far, seeing along the way houses that had what I needed, or had aspects of what was important; the house being something that was a greater potentiality. 

None of these houses were houses that I stopped at per se, I just admired the neighborhood. It was interesting to be able to drive around in this plush neighborhood and look at all of these humongous mansions and, somehow or another, ingest what that reflected or represented. 

And all along, as I was doing this, I could feel at some depth within that where I was going was possible – even though I felt I lacked the means in the current state that I was in. In other words, it’s like I’m not quite accepting that I belong in this neighborhood. 

I felt this way because I knew that the body vehicle I was traveling in could take me… I could intrude, or take myself into these neighborhoods, or every neighborhood, to see what was occurring – because a house is a part of yourself – to see what the potentialities were. 

But at the same time I could still carry a self doubt in which I, as I saw myself, personally lacked the means. In other words, it felt like I could get out of the veil, I could see it but not quite own it. And then all of a sudden, apparently at the opportune time when it was meant to be, I was granted the access that shifted me into the groove, so to speak, that I needed.  

This was like being handed off from one state to another, or to a station, or to a completeness so that this much-needed other way of what I was perceiving could suddenly be, that’s one way of saying it, or that this other was a veiled access within, veiled by limitations that suddenly dropped away. 

This is kind of how I actually, deep down, believe that it is, because I don’t believe that there is – even though it’s always presented as if there’s the ascended masters and stuff like that – I believe those are all vibrations that one catches up with inside of themselves and, for lack of a better word, you describe it as something greater than one’s self and you talk about angel worlds, and all of that sort of thing.

But I actually believe we carry all of that, or otherwise there would be multiple things. I believe we carry all of the levels within, so that there is really only one God. And that the radical idea is, is that we, in our fullest of fullest of beings, are that one God. But the access to that opens up little by little by little to more and more and more, as if something is given to us. Or better yet, that state or quality or something in us, a longing, or a quest or however it is, that we take, refuses to settle for anything but that. 

Whenever it is that we settle for something, then we stop and partake, in some sort of manifested way with things, or if we’re out of body then I don’t know quite how we ever get quite through that because it seems like the manifestation of things, as a means of living something through, is what physical existence is about.

So I remember seeing within the potentiality, because I could feel it in my bones, and then having a dream that reflected the journey within – symbolically.

So in the dream I was in a vehicle driving in a neighborhood which had some amazing houses for me to see. They were all incredible, but somehow I knew that even more was possible. 

Suddenly I drove to a place where the house before me took up an entire city block. It’s as if house after house that was quite incredible ultimately led to this. It felt like a natural evolvement. In other words, it’s not like this house looked like it didn’t belong, because I was okay within that this made sense, that this fit in given the transitioning step by step that was occurring.  

On this place a very bright light shined down from above, or it lit up a portion of it or something, to highlight the value of it in some sense. In other words, it made it a spotlight state of attention. Seeing this told me that whatever I sought, from within, was visibly possible, knowing that when you see something it eventually comes into being. 

So I had this whole sense that even if there was something more than just this, or an even greater level of beingness, all of that was possible because I couldn’t help but behold that this occurred, step by step, or thread by thread, or journey by journey, or focus by focus or however you’d describe that.

So the dream kind of is self explanatory, except I wrote this part in terms of what is going on. The dream took me on a journey through barriers to show me that the journey I am on knows no limitations, other than what I impose upon myself. And that I have a means of traveling as far as the aspirations, and the longing that is embraced, are able to take me.  

Now, whether you want to call it a longing, or whatever it is that compels you to just keep on keeping on, that’s what it is.

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