Find the Tomato

tomato8Jeane’s dream begins with an arranged marriage, and then being required to dance for some men that might try to sell her off. Yet at the end a twist arises: a beautiful strand of tomatoes that become jewels. What could this possibly mean? As John explains, we must understand what we marry ourselves to in this outer world. If it is the right thing, for the right reasons, it allows something truly beautiful to blossom. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: So in my dream I feel like I’m a young woman who is at the age she’s supposed to marry, and my family would have me marry this person with a title. And it feels like at one point I’m taken aside and I’m put in a little room and I have to dance for someone. And it’s not a man I’m supposed to marry. It’s more like a broker for someone else, another person might even sell me off to. 

So I kind of dance with my back to them in a way that’s a little bit tantalizing enough to tease them, but really not be immodest or anything, because I have no intention of being sold off to them – whoever he’s a broker for. 

I see myself, after I’m dancing, talking to someone in my family. And it’s not that I object marrying the person they want me to marry, it’s just that they want me to marry him because he has a title and I would be more prone to marry him if he didn’t. 

Then I see myself in the room where I was dancing again, and it feels like suddenly the room is filled with this really vivid image of something that I feel like are almost jewels, except they look like a strand of tomatoes that are tiny tomatoes with little budding tomatoes on them, that just fill the room, and then they become like jewels. When they become like jewels, they become like pearls. 

It’s right after they’ve been this really vivid tomato color. It was very interesting. Then they become pearls of I think white and maybe some pink. Then I woke up.

John: In the dream, you’re carrying a particular quality, that’s the way you feel yourself, and in feeling yourself in this particular way in relationship to the environment that you’re in, that sense of well being that you’re stroking yourself with is getting in the way of something that can come to the surface and be really bright and wonderful.

It’s a tomato. It’s very generic, very basic, doesn’t have any airs or anything about it. And if it can be like that, that would be wonderful, but if it is something that has to do with where you’re holding on to something – as an aspect or quality of what is trying to emerge – then you end up with a bit of a problem. And thus you have this whole discussion as to what it is that you’re to marry.

Now, a part of you knows that you’re not supposed to adhere, or aspire, to something that creates this pseudo degree of satisfaction, in terms of everything being kosher, because that somehow or another makes your rapport, in terms of the Whole, conditional. It’s better that, whatever state that you find yourself in, that it just comes from a depth of balance inside of yourself and it doesn’t have to be about anything.  

I guess what one is meant to see is, okay, yes there is this state that you have but you can’t groove over the state, that instead you have to be very basic and very ordinary and very normal, as if, so what? Because there is something meant to unfold in relationship to that.

It causes me to remember a statement that was made that I pondered and pondered and pondered, that’s made in the Raj yoga tradition: It’s not the mask that you have on that’s offensive, it’s the presence of that mask on your face that’s offensive. Which means your way of perceiving, or seeing, yourself in a particular way, that’s what’s offensive.

Being a particular way, just because of the conditions that you’re in and the circumstances that you find yourself in – that’s okay. It’s the taking it on as a type of image. And in working that out, and that was like, I don’t know, a dream or something, or a statement, I can’t even remember the whole ramifications of that, other than the fact that it was like a type of Rubik’s Cube to figure out, that it was okay to be a particular way, but it wasn’t okay to take on the air of that particular way. That was something that veiled, and was totally offensive, and kept you from being able to be natural to what was unfolding.

So that’s also kind of a theme somehow or another. In my case it has to do with a mannerism, some aspect of my mannerisms in which I am doing, propelling myself with these mannerisms, and there is some sort of motif behind those mannerisms that is creating walls, it is creating issues with everything that I have, every degree of my nature, and it is causing me from making the correspondence within because this other gets in the way somehow and creates a greater and greater distance.

And of course because that dreaming is masculine, it looks like it’s something that one does. It’s a rising, pushing through of an energy that one does that sets in motion this kind of distango. And in your case, it’s something that you take on as a quality of what you sweep in, in terms of your container energy. And the way you feel about that, you can well up into the marvel of the space of what that is like and wear it, almost as a security blanket.

And if you do that, then it takes away the naturalness that can also just be there if you can just not have to go through all of that – that’s meant to just be there. A dream like this would scare me because that would mean that something had to get smashed, but it’s not what is indicated in your dream.

What’s indicated in your dream is you just have to shift a little bit and find the tomato. And the tomato is a wonderful image in terms of how it ripens and how it explodes itself into a way of nurturing. It’s a wonderful image that just mushrooms up for no apparent reason whatsoever.

In other words, it’s not like something you aspire to or anything like that – it just rises up. And so the fact that you have that as an image in relationship to something as a tonality that’s questioned to the degree to which you take it on, or accept it or don’t accept it.

That’s a very healing and wonderful image and implies or suggests that you can take what is in front of you and drop whatever the other is and find what is meant to well up from this, inside yourself, turn it into something like that.

And the fact that I have a mannerism that continues to create some sort of barrier, gap, or distance or something no matter what kind of proximity of vibrational energy it’s able to touch, that there’s something under attack, or under assault, of every degree of my nature, keeping me behind walls and keeping me from hitting that correspondence of where something comes directly in alignment between inner and outer, as is meant to be as a flow, as a naturalness.

The fact that I would see that would indicate that I’m supposed to understand and get that I’m going to have this energy that’s going to be shooting out, but I have to let go of a certain attention with it, as if I’m aiming it for some sort of end all or whatever. I’m not to act like that because I don’t. All I do is fortify a position somehow or another that’s walled out.

In other words, there’s something subtle that has to be deduced to the vibrationalism and that alone. So this is a dream that challenges my focus and attention, just like your dream challenges the way that you aspire or see yourself, as aspired into a particular way or a particular overallness, and that the one way that you have of stroking yourself with it is not good, but a very slight shift and within that is able to be found that which mushrooms organically.

Very interesting state of attention that one is being kind of pressured into, or exposed.

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