Here is a dream that has Jeane confronting one of the most difficult issues in a spiritual journey: letting go of the idea that what happens in life is personal to us. Yes, it may happen to us personally, but in the end, those events don’t matter. What does matter is, how can we let go of our idea of personal identity and merge with the Wholeness of creation? (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
Jeane: I just pulled out my last dream. I was pretty tired after a long drive.
In that dream it’s like there’s a man who runs his own business, and there are actually two women he’s seeing, one who’s kind of helping him in the business, but doing so from a sense of a little insecurity and trying to establish her place, maybe even get him to marry her, and there’s another woman who comes in and it feels like she’s kind of his shadow, with a similar dynamic but maybe not as much power.
I seem to come on the scene and the other woman had been hoping the man would marry her, but I know the man and I will be married. But meanwhile it’s like at first she’s trying to keep me out some by kind of making statements like, I don’t really even understand the quarterlies – and she’s right in a way.
I mean, I can come in and I can look at the quarterlies and stuff at some point, but there hasn’t been any reason to do that. The man wants me to come in the office and scratch his back while they’re meeting, and I think that’s presumptuous.
I think I do it, but I’m annoyed, and I just see all of this chaos going on and how we’re relating and it feels like then I feel like have to kind of suck it up and start establishing some order there, because sometimes an old pattern would be to take a feminine like that and kick her out, but on the other hand she has worked in the business, and she’s done something, so even if I establish my place there should be a place for her, too.
It’s just going to be a bit of work, for sure, and there are little things they’re doing to sabotage me now and then that I have to be aware of and sidestep. And then the man’s being, the masculine’s being kind of presumptuous and I have to do something about that, too, so it just feels like my dream included a lot of work.
John: Well, for some strange reason you make some sort of bigger deal than you’re supposed to, and you need to quit doing that – in terms of appearances, or a type of indulgence.
It’s almost as if you make something out of that as if it means something else, and whatever you do in terms of that, if you’re not careful, you orient your life around that, and that limits who you are, and that precludes you from being free, because then your energetic gets subordinate to the characteristics and qualities of such a nature that you are holding and projecting as a type of aliveness that will make your life meaningful.
Well, the thing of it is, is in the dream you are finding yourself nauseated by that. And it’s as if maybe you’ve spent your lifetimes doing something like this, and you now know that this sort of supporting of something, for a particular kind of well being, demeans a greater trait inside of yourself that can just come out and do something on its own for what it is.
And so you’re coming to recognize, you’re coming to look at the components of what you had always done in relationship to this other part that has its own sense, from which is emerging some sense on its own, to take on a dynamic that is who you really are, that you’ve never given yourself quite the permission to do because you have kept yourself in some sort of subjective conceptualization in terms of what would, and needed, to ultimately unfold.
And now you realize – the heck with those notions or ideas. That just keeps you in some sort of trance. And that you can take and, for a change of pace, drop all of that because of the nausea you see all around you in terms of things like that, and then it’s as if as soon as that drops away a whole other dimension, or dynamic, is able to open up in terms of how you’re able to live.
Isn’t that interesting?
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