Grasping By Letting Go

raysThis many-layered dream reveals the subtlety of dream imagery. Here Jeane has three masculine elements at different levels of integration and she is working with each of them to get them to intertwine more deeply. As John says, it may seem hard to sort out, but the dream world already has it sorted out! (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: In my main dream it feels like my mother’s mother’s house is empty because my grandmother has died. I mean, she died some time ago, it almost feels like. We’ve put that house on the market to sell, but it’s going to take time to sell. 

Meanwhile, there are some people that have come into town and I seem to be trying to match-make between these people, but one of the young men, he seems like he’s in his 20s or something, is not very together. He’s the brother of another guy who’s more together. And I have a woman I want to match him up with, but he’s just not very together yet, so I’m letting him stay at my grandmother’s house. 

There are times when I also go over to my grandmother’s house because it’s for sale. When I’m there, at one point some man comes in and he’s talking to me about, we’ll never sell it because it’s old, and there’s this problem and there’s that problem, and I just disagree with him because its location there is up above the lake, and because I think it has good bones. 

It’s almost like I can’t really listen to what he says on one level because I don’t quite get the point of just going in and being negative, and because I have a feeling it will. But that isn’t even my main concern. I have a certain appreciation for it just because it was my grandmother’s house. 

Then it feels like when I’m trying to do the matchmaking between these couples, it’s like I bring a group of them together, but the first time it’s almost like it doesn’t work because the guy who’s kind of off just doesn’t even get the clue, doesn’t even know how to approach the right woman, so it feels like I try another time. 

This time it feels like the woman herself, I think she even comes with one of her pets, a dog or something, and she’s very assertive and strong, so I kind of feel like maybe she’ll take charge. 

That’s just impressions I have from that dream. I didn’t pull all of it out really well. Then I had a shift to an entirely different thing.

John: Okay, so if I have this right, first of all you have a person that you allow to stay at what is your grandmother’s house, or used to be her old house.

And then there’s another person, another guy, who comes into some scenario that you’re in and puts down this house in terms of its marketability to be sold – as far as it being able to be sold.

Jeane: And then there’s a third guy who’s the brother of the dysfunctional guy.

John: And he’s okay?

Jeane: Yeah, I’m trying to match-make both brothers, but he’s more together so I don’t have to do much there.

John: Wow. I was wondering how that would ever come together.

What you have is you have a certain blindside, and I find the blindside okay because it pulls something together in terms of its intentionality. But in a way, it’s like a blindside, and if you didn’t have the blindside something could actually be more out of balance.

In other words, you take and you use a certain quality in your surroundings to kind of wrap yourself in a kind of acceptance, or gratitude, and it rises up somehow within you. And often times then, when you project it out, it doesn’t necessarily fit the situation that is around you, but that’s okay, because what you’re doing is hoping to hold a cadence of something together.

But, in a way, I often wonder if it’s a blindside because, do you recognize the degree to which it is not necessarily taken in, or accepted, as it should be taken in and accepted? Because there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you doing this.

In fact, this is the way to be. What is wrong is that it is often extended out in a way that isn’t properly appreciated, which is actually a way of trying to lean on something, I guess, to help facilitate this quality inside yourself that is reverberating with a certain kind of natural exhilaration.

The dream tries to talk about all three aspects of this sort of thing. First you have the aspect of the person who is to stay in your grandmother’s house, which is put up for sale. That is a condition of the masculine that is in transition, not there yet, but is introduced to an equation of something as a beauty, and appreciation, and depth of being – as if in an environmental-effect way, so that it can glean something from that.

That part is quiet and passive, and there’s an inflectiveness in that. Then there’s the other part that lacks the recognition of what all is involved, in terms of the overall wholeness of things, and some quality, almost like a type of sacred quality, in the environment.

And that part of the masculine is pooh-poohing what you are holding onto, and using as a type of sacred, old part of yourself, saying to you that it’s a difficult sell, so it’s actually kind of beating up on you.

Then there’s another part that’s not doing that, nor is it placed in where it is being helped, because the first part is actually being helped. It’s like the feminine is trying to give something to the masculine in the first part.

In the second part, the masculine is not as receptive as it should be, and so there’s a lack of proper intertwining.

In the third part you have a kind of amnesia, in other words, where you have those two conditions kind of outside of their normal acuity, stepped back so to speak, so that what unfolds is not over-the-top as it could possibly be in the one instance, especially if it’s not recognized or seen for what it is meant to be all about.

Nor is it disrespectful and repudiatory as in the second aspect of a masculine trait. It kind of is sitting there considering neither one nor the other, maybe almost retard by comparison, because the others have a different kind of acuity to them.

So what you’re describing is a way that you use a quality of yourself that’s both ancient and present to work with the awakening of him and a groundedness, in other words, that holds something together, which has a masculine orientation to it, which has to be brought into the equation in order to make things properly, succinctly alive.

This is a very subtle dream, a really quiet flicker type dream that, at its root, has to do with sustaining and maintaining a livability quality, with a sense of awareness, and a certain degree of natural ambivalency so that it doesn’t get too self-conscious, one way or another, about things. That gives it its auric space to be able to absorb and take in things so that it can then function in the outer – an outer that has discombobulations simply because it’s the outer .

But you have an inner that you can tune to absorb, to handle, and to relate to that sort of thing. So this is a dream where you don’t beat yourself up at all because what you’re doing, I mean, to try to describe it in its component parts can act like okay, you’re holding a gun to your head over having this flared out this way, and that like that, and then there’s this like this, and how do you sort this all out?

Well, the dream has sorted it out. It’s just hard to say, because what the dream has done is that it has put you in touch with a kind of quality of the heart that takes in all three spaces simultaneously – without breaking them into those three parts.

They’re broken into the three parts for you to see how they intertwine. You can have the part that is overboard in its gesture, and can therefore be slapping itself for being overboard in its gesture and its manner, as if it’s overexuberant or overly gleeful or whatever.

And, if you’re doing that, and trying to refrain and steer yourself from being misguided or misplaced when you do that, then you’re beating up on yourself – and that’s not right. That part, that exuberance, that exhilaration, is important, is part of you, it’s necessary, and it’s a power, and it’s a linkage, and it’s part of your sight.

Even though that sight can be a little bit peculiar from time to time, it’s part of how you have to be. You can’t lose that. You can’t beat yourself up over that, because that part being like that is also simultaneously, at a deep core of itself, working with trying to introduce something, to try to show something, to try to reveal something all the time in terms of a hiddenness.

In other words, this is your mother’s old house that’s being put up for sale. That doesn’t mean that it’s being lost. It means it seems to be something of a bygone era, but you are bringing something in, you are revealing something through this old quality of yourself because you’re putting a part of the masculine there.  

And I suppose you could beat up on yourself there by saying, why in the heck are you doing all of that, this piece of property should be put up for sale? This is messing with the mechanics of things, which should be happening in kind of a moving-on way. But no, you don’t move on. Everything past, present, and future is all together in the moment.

Then there’s kind of the blend of the two, and the blend of those two states still has a substance to it. It’s pretty deep though, even as a blend, because the way you have to describe that is it has its auric nature that is able to handle a lot of things that are going on, without being overwhelmed, or getting worn out, or cracking, or finding itself weakish or something. So that’s a state.

So what they are is like kind of three different notes that work together as one note, and that if you’re not taking in all three of those, with a focus and intentionality that holds and brings them together as a greater composite of how and what you really are, if you’re not doing that then you’re quibbling with them as if you’re trying to find the alignment.

And in this particular instance, they’re broken into three parts so that you can see how they align  – because they work together. Quite a wonderful, subtle dream isn’t it? 

Another way of saying it is that each of those can, in its own way, be a type of throwing a person around with the intention of one grasping by letting go so that the cadence of that comes together.

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