An Inner Will

peelIn this dream scenario, John feels trapped in the upper rooms of a castle – yet he is not accepting this fate as the others around him do. This situation is not unlike the challenge we all face as humans: do we go along with what everyone else says is “important,” or do we listen to our inner compass and find a better way in life? Just like NASA wouldn’t build a Mars rover it couldn’t communicate with, what created us does have a way to communicate – but it is up to us to listen and, by choice, respond. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: I have to approach this more as a type of amnesia or neurosis. In other words, you, the feminine, kind of knows or has a sense somehow, almost a better intuition or something, that kind of knows what the wholeness is whether they can get it or not. When they hear it, they can hear it. 

The masculine doesn’t work subjectively, has to work objectively so it’s always trying to find something that is like an amnesic condition or quality that exists, maybe at some point in time outside of their capability of remembering because maybe it was while they were in another incarnation or something. 

So this thing starts off where I’m in the upper area of a castle-like place. So, first of all this starts off with what is necessary to break free. This is the break-free vibe. I guess this is similar to your first dream where your idea of breaking free is you just get what is yours. You close the gap between one side and the other, knowing that it’s promised, and over time it comes together and then you go along and it closes and the river or whatever that stood in between comes to an end or something and it comes together.

And, in my particular case, you have to throw off the chains or the impediments of something, as a precondition that holds over you, in order to bring the clarity through. So I’m in the upper area of a castle-like place and this castle is like a prominent landmark in the area. It stands out.

And I’m not the only one, there are others that reside in this upper area. And when you’re in this upper area it’s not like you can go to the lower area, you’re stuck up there. And the prevailing mood is that we’re trapped in this setting. 

In other words, you were stuck in this promenade. Different from the others, I do not accept the foregone conclusion that there is no way out. And I discover and point out to a woman that when you go out into a corridor, it’s like a hallway-type corridor, at the far end of that corridor is a window that looks out over a ledge, and is kind of like a part of the roof that’s out there. You can see that and, from my perspective, I feel it is a means of escape. 

The woman does not accept that this can be done, and I’m unable to convince her otherwise, or lift her spirits, no matter how convincingly confident I am that this is possible. This is a way out. I open the window and the exposed area is old and in a state of decay. The brick is loose and ready to give way, so it’s a little treacherous.

And, of course, that convinces the woman even more that this is not going to work: the appearance of danger exists. And I know that just a short distance that you can’t quite see it from the angle that you’re looking out the window, but I seem to sense that there is like a tree that sticks up there, and this is way up off the ground, and then somehow or another maybe one can make it into the tree and go from there down to the ground. 

Your condition of the area and the window with the loose brick and this precariously deteriorating condition, although this is sufficient to discourage the woman and everyone else, for some reason that makes sense to me that it would be like that. So I find the condition to be interesting and I have hope in the fact that there is an answer to the despair which I see and believe to be getting overly misconstrued. 

In other words, just because everyone accepts that this is the state that they’re in, which is kind of hopeless, the way I seem to be is I sense something deep within and so I refuse to let that other, which they all carry, which has a vibration that creates a sadness or something, I refuse to let that rub off on me. 

So what is going on is, what I feel within is a defiance, or an opposition, to the appearances accepted by everyone else. And the reason why I can be like that is I can feel from deep within a sense of freedom that is beckoning, and I can sense from within that there is a way out of the condition I am in. 

I just feel it in my bones, or in my being. It’s welling up in some capacity and, therefore, that’s what makes it true. Others do not have that inner will, or image, or vibration, or sense of breakthrough or something, so they are unable to find the confidence or conviction necessary to redeem themselves from their condition. 

So what is going on is, I am not able to buy into the prevailing despair, and when one gets to the point where they don’t buy into the prevailing despair, that’s when you’re overcoming a condition of a type of sorrow or trauma that holds you back. That something awakens instead.

So this is like an answer dream and then I go into all of the things that are haywire just like what you went into something that had to do with a type of security, or it actually being lost. 

I didn’t realize this – this is interesting. My first dream is an answer dream, and then comes the other parts that one has to contend with, just like your dream was a completion answer dream, and then comes the fact that what does it mean when it’s lost and where does that go? 

And there’s a positive feature in your dream, too, in which when something isn’t there it’s not like it’s worse for the wear. The appreciation is great. And there is a flip side in this, too, in which I realize something at a greater depth from having to go through the separation – but that’s later in the dreaming. 

But what is going on in this dream is, I’m not able to buy into the prevailing despair because this doesn’t correspond to what I feel within that is pushing me to break free of the outer conditions. Consequently, where others see further despair, I see hope. And I believe that what I feel welling up from within is strong enough to see me through. I believe that I can reach beyond the prevailing limitations which everyone else has come to accept as overpowering. 

And the deeper meaning is that I’m accessing a need to act upon a raw energy that enables me to rise up and become creative in order to overcome the surroundings I am supposedly trapped in like everyone else. This defiance stirs up an energy which is beckoning me to reach out. This quickening I feel within is enlightening and a source of great hope. 

And you could say it another way, too. The despair which prevails in the other kind of sits or hovers over things so thickly and densely that I can’t buy into something like that that densely, so it’s almost as if a confidence rising up within is able to cut it with a knife, so to speak, this knife being an inner will that is not to be denied.

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