To continue the recent series of chase dreams, John finds himself running from one hideout to another. Miraculously, each time the situation becomes dire, a new escape possibility arises. That’s great, one might think. Yet the truth is that John’s character keeps finding more drastic means to avoid what he should be accepting – to the point where he ends up blowing up a bridge with dynamite to get away. And so it is in life: if we deny our spiritual aspect, we just go from one form of calamity to another, all the days of our lives. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
John: Well, it’s interesting when we dream the same thing, only in my case I reverb more.
In this dream, I get away from captors and I establish a huge head start before they realize that I have gotten away. And so I go to a home I have, a place that I have kind of in the woods or something, that is kind of a getaway, a special spot for me. And it’s in this place that I plan on gathering up what I need.
In other words, there are provisions there that I can pick up in terms of being able to continue on. I know when I go there that I have a little bit of time before this delves at me in a deeper way, or in another way, because it’s like they’ll also realize, okay, where is it that he might go? And somehow can figure out that, okay, I do have this retreat cabin or something and then they’ll come look for me there.
So I know I can’t stay here. But because I have this great head start on them, and wasn’t noticed right away, I could come to this cabin. But I don’t move on fast enough. I get dulled or something having come back to this familiarity. So I know I needed to be in and out, but my captors suddenly arrive.
But little did I know that within the seed of that whole run, chase, escape thing, there was something else as a dynamic going on that kept me from really realizing any kind of satisfaction – especially when I look at it after the fact – because it turns out that a bounty hunter was hiding in this place the whole time, and he was waiting for the opportune time to reach up and nab me.
But in the confusion of these other pursuers getting there, and he surfaces then because he could have and would have acted on his own in due time, but now with them there, and they all have a mission to catch me, it’s almost like, who has the right, or whatever?
And so in that confusion I am able to escape out a back door and a strange thing happens. I get out the back door and it’s like, okay, well they’re right there, okay, they’re going to be right behind me, so something else needs to switch in order to give me at least the idea that I’m making some headway.
So it just so happens that here in this back-wooded area suddenly there’s a bus that stops, and I’m able to jump on the bus before it takes off. And so that’s going to get me down the road because they’re on foot. And so the bus whisks me away.
And so I get to another place and I’m hanging out in this other place when the pursuers arrive again. This time I give them the slip by getting out the back door and I start running. Well, that’s not very good. They can run, too. And so I need something else in this dream in order to help me because otherwise I’ll get under the neurosis of, there they are, right behind me, or something.
As it turns out the people who are in this particular place decide that they’re committed to helping me along, so they take off and the next thing you know I’m in the back of a pickup truck. And so I’m going way faster than these pursuers could possibly go.
It’s kind of a narrow road, it’s not much of a lane, actually, that one’s driving up. It’s kind of brushy but there is a road, whatever you want to make out of it, because a vehicle is able to zip along. In the back of this pickup truck, when I look out, I could see initially leaving them in the dust, but then there’s something that just keeps on continuing.
I can always keep seeing it, and that’s when I realize that there are some pursuers that have a vehicle that’s able to kind of keep up. Well, okay, you know I have to continue to keep finding a space to work with as I’m reverbing with this, so I seem to have some dynamite and it seems like we go over a bridge and I blow up the bridge. And that now enables me to have an edge there again to keep ahead of them.
In other words, with each reprieve there is a sense of false security I notice in my breath, when I think that this time it’s going to be different, and that I’m making headway, going somewhere, getting away. However, only to find out that wherever I go, or however I find myself, I’m not able to relax long before I have to confront this part of myself all over again.
It’s not going to go away. It is what is going on on a deep, deep level in terms of how it is that I’ve been imaged. It goes all the way back to that kind of a meaningfulness, but it goes through these stages for me to catch up with that meaningfulness. That’s how I’ve been dreamed is to be like this, but it goes through the stages all the way from a shadow aspect to it, to like I say an aspect where you’re afflicted by it because it’s too much for you, and all the way to the point where it’s a type of dharma that gets caught up in an aspect of ego expression.
It’s how you see yourself, and then you see yourself separate from everyone else because you’re like this, and they’re like this other, and this is where your talents are. This is what works for you, this is what works for them, so you bicycle around like that all the way up to the dynamic then that you struggle and you fight to maintain this sort of thing.
You can even get sacrificial with it, feeling, okay, if life is more than that then at least I can do this, that, or the other and kapooey with things. That’s how I’ll solve my victimization, all the way up to the point where this energetic, like I say has a kundalini energy aspect to it, and also it has the archetypal pattern to it to the degree that it throws you around and you’re victimized by it and you can’t get away from it.
And you have to overcome that, and then there are aspects. there are some archetypes that come off of that in terms of other mannerisms and mechanisms and means by which you come to see yourself as distinct and different. All of it kind of correlated to something that you never quite fully back yourself into, in which there is a listening center to it, and then there is a guidance to it, and then there is something more in which it is like, okay, like a type of thought of something to which you need to own, or come to grips with, on a higher level of yourself.
And all along that whole way is some aspect of ego because you’re in the outer, but it then is a question of degree of the loud one, whether it’s a putrefied ego, or whether it kind of becomes an ego that is aligned in such a way that it can work with trying to touch the greater whole.
So in terms of what’s going on, of course, the dream that I had, reporting it in just kind of a blunt way, is like a melodrama that takes one on a journey, from scene to scene, catching up in the process with who and what I am, and how I’m meant to be, in a more whole state.
But of course that’s not how I’m seeing myself. I’m seeing myself continuously trying to survive, so to speak. I’m not able to get away from what’s haunting me. I can’t get away from it. It’s meant to be me. I’m meant to reach it. It’s meant to catch me.
But until I come to know that, I can’t catch up with who I am, I can’t determine where I’m meant to be, and I have to somehow eventually get to the point where I gather myself up with a perception that has a whereabouts focus that is a depth within.
I call it a whereabouts focus because there’s a listening center to it, it goes all the way back to you being like a chip-off-the-old-block of God, or something, as an expression that’s in life that has a sight and sound to it.
It’s no good, of course, if that’s all you identify with, meaning in a lower-self way. You have to get to the point where you identify with this in an intertwined wholeness. So what I see is that each episode evolves into the next, this being an endless adventure from scene to scene. That’s how it is when you’re just thrown around by your synapses of something and you don’t come to go behind that to a deeper level.
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