A Composed Demeanor

pebblesIt should be a clue to us that whenever we have those moments where we feel like we’re in some sort of flow, we’re usually quiet and observant in ourselves, we’re not over-thinking things. John has a dream that portrays just that. He and a woman sit together. They don’t know one another, but they’re connected. It is only when he begins to become intellectual about it that the connection fades. In every imaginable way, we try to impose ourselves on situations that are already “fine.” (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: The nature of the dreaming last night was a type of dreaming in which one took and eased up, or subsided, in their nature in terms of how loud things are, in terms of what they have to look at.

In other words, you could step back. In other words, there was a quality of being able to feel like it’s a kind of a pressure that’s off, a pressure that normally is associated with trying to cause something to catch up with something and, as a consequence, everything you bang on is based upon outer reflections and nuances that you have – and so you have dreams that come off accordingly.

And all of a sudden if you drop some of those nuances and you get into a kind of a letting go, this is harder to dream in because the images are more in relationship to having come together and combined with a greater whole, so you don’t normally dream in the usual kinds of dilemmas that you have trying to hold things together in terms of how your typical world is inclined to be. You tend to dream feathery images that kind of pooh-pooh things a bit.

And this dream starts off just portraying how the letting go can look. And in this dream I’m at a university, and I guess I’m an upperclassman at the university, and I’m standing out looking over things, over an area, and in the distance there are two women at different spaces to each other that I am able to look at.

And as I’m in this state just completely not having anything that I have to do in particular, and not having to note or pay attention to anything in particular, to my surprise sitting on my lap with her back to me, but sitting kind of in my lap like if I’m in a chair she’s sitting on my lap or however that is, because she’s looking straight out in that direction, too.

And it’s a woman I’ve never, ever seen before. Everything is completely at ease because she is doing what she needs to do in a content, restful, and protective position way, just peering out over the horizon. So there is no wondering what’s going on, or disturbing of that stillness, until I start wondering, how did she get there?

I start to wonder, who is she? Have I ever seen her before? And why is she so comfortable doing this? And what am I doing?

So I break the trance, and when I look at her, then everything is weird; better that I didn’t even pay any attention to her because we were in a mutual flow. And any of the information I get just demeans or takes away from the expanse of things that was just in an unfoldment that was natural.

I find out that she moved to the area from Brooklyn, that she’s a freshman, and she’s a history student. Now, what good did that do me? Nothing at all. It was like going on and on and on, but instead what was happening was the natural intertwined connection that didn’t have to have any explanation whatsoever, that was just reaching out and functioning all by itself.

So the dream is portraying the composed demeanor I need to be abiding in naturally. That is what makes the dream so relaxed. I’m totally at ease with whatever is going on and do not need to ask any questions.

When I suddenly realize that I do not know what is happening, or think then that I have to ask the questions or figure out where I’m at, that is when things get stirred up from a balance as I try to figure out what is what. This disrupts an at ease naturalness and condition in which there needn’t be anything that is said. Just be, with no explanations, in a state of total letting go.

The deeper meaning is, only a totally letting go nature can find itself at ease, within, naturally. The tendency is to be paying attention to this or that, and thus is strange to some degree or another.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: A Composed Demeanor

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