Needing the Within

maxaultPerhaps the most elusive aspect of a spiritual journey is the idea of living from inner into outer. What does that mean? And how does it look? Well, it will be different for everyone, that’s why all true religions are personal religions. But it might begin with a consistent letting go of the personalized views and feelings about our moment-to-moment experience, while remaining open and available. i.e., listening, for the guidance from within. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: And then the dream I had in the morning takes it into the image. And in this dream, I’m looking at a map. On this map is a whole bunch of places that are marked on the map and those are all experiences that have swept me up in some fashion, in terms of outer places I’ve been with myself.

But what I notice is that all of these places, or stations or whatever experiences, or however you would say that, keep coming down. They don’t go up. They keep coming down, on the visual map, of the symbolic map. They’re all exciting to me, but they keep coming down. They’re not going this way and that way, and all over. They’re supposed to keep coming down.

In having experienced each place on this map, I’m able to keep coming down because I have to integrate the effect inside of myself, so that my consciousness is able to absorb, to be grounded simultaneously.

And this was harder to see because the image wasn’t there, but I had some sense of it. I experienced the going-up sensation and this energetic is harder to perceive. This is where your kundalini flows off and whatnot, yet it’s imperative and necessary and essential in keeping me oriented to the whole. Without this vibration there as well, it’s not possible for me to properly orient myself to the experiences of the outer.

I need the within to keep the perspective to the whole. In other words, the magnetic, gravitational orientation of physical existence would consume if I didn’t have this inner spatiality.

Thus I am able to understand the expression, “to see the forest through the trees.” Or similarly speaking, if I am always going out and do not know how to take energy into the outer to experience the one-to-one correspondence of inner/outer, I’m not able to awaken. Both directions are needed.

What is going on?

In the dream, I experience—and by what is going on now, I’m talking about what is there about the human being that causes this to be constantly at play—and what it is, this is what stands behind the meaningfulness of the breath. The in-breath. The out-breath. The in-breath. The out-breath. The constant contending with this. The in-breath takes me to an inner home. The out-breath brings me back into manifestation, where if I do not hold onto the inner essence of the in-breath, I will become consumed by the denseness of the outer. However, with each experience simultaneously, life in the outer is sustainable and the inner awakening is grounded.

What I am doing is intertwining what appears intellectually to be opposite directions. For there to be a natural integration in the whole, the two directions must be aligned with each other as counterbalancing forces.

The innerness is too transcendent in and of itself to be grasped. The outer reflection, which I imaged as a coming down kind of roadmap, provides the imminence needed. But you have to put the inner and the outer together for there to be a proper consciousness of the whole.

Or to say it as a Taoist image, the greater the darkness—or statement, rather—the greater the darkness, the more light is possible.

And there is also the yin-yang symbol of light and darkness in harmony yet seen in contrast to each other. And the Oxnard picture of the bull that is black, you know, which over time becomes more and more white as the innerness is able to be appreciated in the outer reflections in manifestation more and more.

And in the Oxnard picture, the way it is generally explained, is this occurs at the end of life from a polishing, in which the blackness, denseness, darkness of one’s youth and unconsciousness is transformed, integrated, polished into a light, whiteness, inner connective awareness, until there is nothing more than the black spot at the tip of the tail.

While back to the yin-yang and how that image is portrayed, because it has the counterbalance, in which you have a black dot in the center of a whiteness that is a flip side of the basically, essentially, when there is the inner and the outer coming together as one, you might say it’s even a flip side of the same coin image, although that doesn’t make sense to a linear mind, in which you have the blackness with a spark of light hidden in the center of it, or nearly hidden in the center of it.

You could actually take this into kind of another way of describing it as saying that each person carries inside of themselves, deep, deep within, in the essence of the heart, or you might say as God hidden in the heart even, a spark, a light that gets brighter and brighter and brighter and brighter. And how that is able to happen as a process is a dynamic that I just dreamt and experienced.

That’s pretty hard to explain to somebody, especially to a literal mind that’s got to have everything all in its Ps and Qs place.

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