Well, there it is: we form our defense mechanisms at an early age to cope with the irrationality of the world we find ourselves in. In many cases they are what allow us to reach adulthood reasonably intact. But, in terms of a spiritual awakening and opening up, they are our nemeses. They no longer protect us, but will ultimately prevent us from the liberation we seek. The good news is we don’t have to “overcome” them, we just need to be conscious of when they are activated. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
Jeane: My dreams last night were hard to remember. I just have pieces of them. In one piece it feels like I go to work somewhere, and I’ve worked pretty hard, but near the end of the workday, or after we’ve even finished the work that I’ve been sitting doing some other people there are taking a break and I go over and join them.
And then someone comes who’s kind of a boss of some kind and kind of a dictator too so he’s all in a huff, or really angry, wants to dock everybody that’s clocked in and isn’t working right that instant. I already actually put in a full shift, but I realize if my time sheet shows any time beyond that shift I have to go back and take it off because he’s just that kind of person.
But the other dynamic going on there is it feels like people are prisoners, and there are some people working behind the bar of a… it’s like a round soda fountain because you can walk all the way around it, and they’re behind it. They have a counter and stools in front of it. And I’m going over and trying to pass them some messages without being seen that will be part of instructions or a plan to help break a few of them free so they can escape from this place. That’s about all I really remember from that dream.
John: You seem to have put in the opposite of what I dreamt. In other words, it’s almost like you’re imaging what it’s like to be in a kind of manifestation where you’re affected, you know, in other words the domain, the feminine domain in manifestation, in which you’re having to contend with that and not necessarily have at your availability the freedom of the inner.
So the theme of the dreaming is like, in the freedom of the inner I’m looking at how that can almost be too much, and how do you bring that through then? In the manneristic of the outer you’re looking at it as being almost too dense, and how do you break free of the thickness of that? Where you feel yourself compelled this way and that way, forced, so to speak, under veils, under illusion so you are forced, and not have the connection to the inner, and the flow there that takes and creates the liberty so that the reflections don’t dominate.
The reflections are nothing more than reflections of the inner, and they work hand in hand and come together. Your dream indicates that you recognize that there is something wrong with being in a forced, or pressurized, or controlled, or contained setting in which you don’t have any liberty because you’re trying to shoot holes in this, pass messages back and forth. In other words, do things that can take and break the effect to create a sense that relieves the being forced or trapped sensation.
Jeane: In the next dream you and I are living in this little apartment and we must have sent away for a book with a manual on lovemaking or something. It’s arrived in the mail so I’m kind of looking through it, but it’s rather graphic so I kind of put it in a compartment above the bed.
And at the same time it seems like we got a camera, and I don’t know if we’ve taken pictures with this camera that might be a little risque or what, but because my cousin and his wife have come over and when they start looking at the camera I feel like I have to kind of take it away because I don’t know whether there are pictures on there they shouldn’t see or not because it feels like I have to communicate with you to figure out what’s on the camera.
At the same time someone comes by and gives me a lottery ticket, so we’re going to a party and there’s going to be a drawing. And we’ve gone outside and suddenly it’s almost like we’re on a Ferris wheel that’s going around and they’ve given me this lottery ticket. I look at the lottery ticket, but the name on it is Maxwell something, like Maxwell Curtis or some name that I’ve never seen before.
So I’ve taken the lottery ticket and I’ve kind of dropped it into the… since we’re on a Ferris wheel and it’s going around I’ve dropped it into the seats that are right below us that are empty.
Then later we’ve gone to the party and I find out that Maxwell has won whatever the prize was. Everybody can’t figure out who that is, so I have to tell them, “Well I guess we’re Maxwell because that was what was on our ticket,” even though I don’t still have it. I’m the only one that seems to know the name.
Meanwhile I’m talking with you and you’ve been kind of quiet and it feels like you’ve lost a lot. You’re used to never losing anything in your investments and stuff, but you’ve lost a lot. I’m trying to figure out if it’s everything or not, and maybe we’re going to need whatever I win on the lottery ticket. But I’m just not sure because you’re being pretty quiet.
And also I’m trying to figure out something about where things are at this party. My dreams were so wispy they were really hard to pick up last night.
John: First of all you’re starting off addressing the limitation, or seeming limitation of just being at an extremism in the outer, in that the combination of the inner, or the extremism of the inner as I dreamt, or the coming together of the masculine and feminine kind of breaks away some sort of barrier that way and creates a recognition, or a realization, creates a certain kind of graphic-ness.
But then you have to contend with whether this is too personal or not, in terms of whether it should be known or shared or whatever. Do you need to keep it personal? And in the keeping of it personal you tend to cloak something, so that you may not note what is able to be given to you, however it is given to you. And your orientation is what is a little askew.
In other words, the ticket in life that is punched in terms of the potentiality of things leads to your maximum well being, Maxwell, maximum well being. However, you don’t necessarily notice that. Instead what you notice is kind of a reflection of the defense mechanism that you’ve taken on to ponder whether or not all of this can be made known, or shown, in terms of the personal, is whether you’re losing things.
In other words, the reason why we have a defense mechanism is for our concept of self-protection to keep from losing something that we consider as important. And it’s a strange logic is what your dream is pointing out, because somehow or another, if you’re not careful, you’ll miss seeing what the maximum well being is.
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