The Waystation

unnamedIt would be nice if we just continually improved ourselves and our lives, but it usually doesn’t work that way. We struggle, we move ourselves toward change and then resist that change, detouring ourselves for days, months, or even years. And we can recognize that when we rationalize grasping tighter to what is familiar, or digging in our heels and thinking we don’t want to let go of something. The reality is, things must fall away as new things take up residence in the process of our lives. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: So then I become aware that the reason I’m in the motel is I’m supposed to get married the next day. Maybe even some of my conversation with the ex-boyfriend was about. It’s almost like he still might want to be in the picture or something like that.

So, I go to the setting where we’re supposed to get married, which is maybe like a restaurant hotel, and what I see there is I see my bridesmaids all show up in these really beautiful outfits, and suddenly I have on this really pretty pink gown. And my grandmother’s there, my sister’s there. They all look really stunning. I mean it’s kind of fun how they look, and it has that kind of really kind of fun bridesmaid-type energy to it.

At the same time, it’s getting closer to the time of the wedding and I realize that I call my sister aside and I say there may be a little problem here. I have a feeling that either no groom is going to show up, because I can’t quite remember who it is I’m marrying, or two are going to show up because the boyfriend from last night and the other guy are going to show up. And I have a feeling that one of these two situations is going to happen and I’m not quite sure what to do about it.

So my sister says that there’s someone who’d shown up that said that he’d be willing to marry me, so we go in search of him. We go back to a part of the hotel that’s almost like not in use right now, and we come back to a kind of recruiter bar area and there are some people hanging out, kind of just in like jeans and tops and stuff like that, pretty informal.

And there’s an Israeli guy and his friend, that I realize that I’ve met in a side dream when I was hiking in Scotland or somewhere, and had joked around with or flirted with or whatever, just kind of joking mostly, and on some level he’d thought that I might even be Israeli and makes some comment about it now that he’s kind of shocked that I’m not. And I’ve kind of gotten to the side a little bit because I realize this isn’t going to work out, but I’m saying to myself that he just thinks that I was Israeli because I’m Sufi, and people think Sufis are just however they are. They tend to fit in. You know what I mean?

So, then I go back to the bridesmaids to find my sister because I realize when I come in there it feels like someone from the hotel comes up and hands me something that almost looks like a bill but, when I read it, it’s just some people that couldn’t come to the wedding and they were sending their best wishes.

Then I look at my sister and decide it’s really time to do something because, since I don’t really know what’s going to happen at this point, and that’s right before I wake up, I have a sensation somebody shows up to be the bridegroom that I don’t even know.

John: The key word here in the shift that is happening is the initial effect. In other words, at this hotel for a wedding, with that which is familiar around you, is that you are taking on an orientation that is familiar and sealed.

When something is sealed that means that it can be defined in a particular established way in terms of the overall orientation of your environment that you are in, as far as you know. However, you’re not able to do that. You’re not able to seal it – but you try.

In other words, you’re trying to bring all of what can come towards you in this particular setting, or scenario, or vibrational way of being, you’re trying to sort that out. In other words, the typical conventional appearance isn’t going to work. You have a sense that’s opened up to so much more. You have a sense that those things even have an identity that they project or place upon you. You have a sense of that in the offing. You have a sense of that in an overallness, if you let go of the way that you want to design something and seal it. You can’t quite completely seal things, and thus you have this other that is floating as an intangible out there trying to get your attention. And so this aspect of the dream shifting is shifting into a movement towards a greater dumbing down of yourself.

In the first part of the dream when you came to recognize that there was something outside of the hotel and then that had parts of yourself that you didn’t know multiplying and coming into an awareness, and then that awareness had to be taken to a true home – and not in the hotel – you were breaking free. But in this sense you’re taking kind of a step back and you’re adamant about trying to pull it together within the setting of the hotel, the energetic of that which is familiar, and have something come together in a capacity that fits that overall image.

However, you’re not quite able to make that happen because you haven’t completely stamped out your… you haven’t completely gone into an amnesia in this particular way. You still have the sense that there is these other outside, but inner circulating, variables that have to live, and come through, and be, that you can’t quite really close the door to.

In other words, you can’t seal yourself even though you would like to. In the other dream, the other part before you shifted, you were more or less finding the limitations of the hotel that you’re in, based upon the catching up with a closer… coming into a recognition of a part of yourself that is beyond that, and then finding that what ensued was you catching up with kittens that multiplied and whatnot that were aspects that just amnesically appeared, that you had to have and take on a responsibility towards, which required you then to continue to progress or to not be caught in the waystation but to go to an inner depth of the home with yourself in order to handle all of that.

That’s an unfoldment, that’s an awakening, but this is not. This is a flickering, and every attempt is being made to put it into an unfoldment control that keeps the order of things in place, in terms of your sister and your dad and the hotel you’re in. You’re there for this reason, or so you’re saying. You’re there to create the reflective illusion, when actually, no, you’re not there for that. You start off like this, but you’re meant to break free of all of that and find out a connectivity that goes beyond the appearances that you readily are predisposed to in terms of a waystation of yourself.

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