The Intangible Side

patrimmatIn this final dream of a series (see A True Home and The Waystation) the struggle that is faced becomes threatening to the level that a devastating tsunami is seen approaching. And here the tsunami represents the enormity of the resistance to letting go, and even triggers the feeling of impending disaster at the idea of allowing a big inner change to happen. And isn’t that how it can feel to us when we face changes? Fears rise up, the worst is imagined, and we think we might not even be ourselves anymore. Or, perhaps, we move closer to our true selves. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: So in this last dream it’s like I’m at a beach in front of a hotel in the water, like up to my knees or something, with an ex-boyfriend that’s kind of off a little ways to my side. And I look out to this really deep blue ocean, and I see a huge tsunami wave out there that’s going to come towards us.

So I motion to him we need to start moving and, at first, you feel like you move a little bit in slow motion, like you can feel the water wanting to drag you out while you’re going forward towards the beach. And then it feels like somehow we reach the hotel, or the sand and the hotel, before the wave hits. But I keep feeling this could be a wave that could even carry away the structure -so we go inside.

When we get inside I feel like it’s a place with no windows. It’s even being constructed, so I start going through the new construction area trying to get to some place, and I see that it feels like it’s a trap in here. I don’t see windows or ways out. Finally I find a door that opens, and I go to an outdoor area and I find myself almost in a stadium area.

And some people have been crawling up to the top of the wall of the stadium are now coming all the way down and across a field. I keep thinking they must have seen the waves starting to come, too, and I’m thinking about if there’s going to be something that hits now, a wave that wipes a lot of things away, like where do we go to get something to eat?

And it feels like there are some people there that would just take what you want and throw it down on the ground, or keep it for themselves. I have found a way out of there. I’ve kind of found a path but, like I said, there are bullies around. I’m not quite sure how to proceed yet. I think that was when I woke up.

John: So what you’re doing is you’ve established in your earlier dreams a type of contanglement that isn’t sorted out. And then, because it isn’t sorted out, and it is meant to be sorted out it, it’s not like you can stay in this condition. It’s not like you can seal things in this capacity. It’s not like you can create the reflections to be this way and that way anymore.

This dream points out what is inevitable, whether you like it or not, and it has the common thread that there is still something that you need to come to know that lies in some capacity, that you shut out in some capacity. You’re trying to bring everything into the hotel, or the transient waystation, in the first dream, and are shielding yourself from the greater dynamic of the overall.

So, in this dream you’re away from the hotel, you’re on the beach, so when you get outside of that kind of familiarizing rapport that you place upon yourself, in other words, this is a twist in terms of the inner and the outer again. The outer is the greater whole for you, and the inner is an indulgent place because it’s at the waystation, it’s at the hotel, it’s not a permanent place. So, when you go out into the outer you come to grips with that which is trying to get your attention, which is trying to come through, which is a connectivity and greater awareness inside of yourself.

In terms of doing that, in terms of holding out for that, it’s almost as if because you’re constantly trying to reach and experience that masculine quality that you’re meant to catch up with, and you haven’t really caught up with it, you know that you’re close to it, if you actually merge or catch up with that, then everything gets torn to pieces. In other words, that’s when it all changes.

Now there are two ways of looking at how all of this changes. One is that, in terms of a top down approach to something awakening, you get to a particular point where you’re holding onto something and need to get rid of that. It has to be smashed. And so something has to come along and obliterate it all. That’s one way of looking at it, which means that to be rescued you would be like in a plight that you cannot seem to get out of yourself, and you yet know that something is not right, that something is missing, that in order to then bring through what is necessary and needed everything has to get obliterated or destroyed. That’s one way of looking at it.

Another way of looking at it is that as you become more responsible in the overall, and take steps to catch up with that which is meant to unfold within you, the masculine quality side of yourself, this leads to a letting go and that letting go is like a violent action which comes up and destroys things.

Part of the dreaming last night had to do with the idea of, whether we like it or not, things are falling away. And that the degree to which we try to hold onto things is the degree to which we keep ourselves in an amnesia. This showed up in the very first part of your dream in that the amnesia you were keeping yourself in was one that kept you from realizing the kittens and the home that they need to go to, and a kitten is a softer, subtler side of yourself. It’s just like a child; in a dream the child is that subtler, deeper, more inner side of yourself that hasn’t been contaminated by outer reflections to the point that it is unable to find the free flow correlation on an inner energetic soulful level anymore. And the child is deemed to be the ticket that can, and that which is subtle like that, that requires tender care, the kitten, is similar to this. It’s a responsibility. A child is something where you still extend your attention.

The kitten, in this particular case, you’re required to bring this quality back to a home, or take through this part that is amnesic to you, you’re meant to be able to come all the way back to home. The last dream is suggesting that even though all of this is intended and meant to be, you’re still attempting to seal, yet you still know better, you’re still haunted by this other trying to come through. And so this is going to create a reckoning in some capacity.

Are you going to be smashed in order to cause this to happen? Well, that’s what it can feel like when you don’t know what’s going on. Or are you going to have to let go of things in some huge way that leaves you distraught because these things are falling away, and your orientation falls away, and a part of you then becomes lost in comparison to how it could have been if you would have been able to seal things in some sort of established way.

So basically you’re catching up with the intangible side of yourself. Too much dreaming, or a deeper dreaming on this level, can throw you into a huge discombobulation of bewilderment. And that bewilderment is facilitated by that which you try to still hold on to or identify with. Another way of saying it is, it’s as if the very slow approach of a kind of a Dhyana state of things has cycled itself around to where you’re no longer able to nail things down and make that happen in the way that you are accustomed to make happen. And if you look at it real closely you’ll find out that you’re letting go of it, or it no longer has its hold on you.

And when you’re letting go of something and it no longer has its hold on you, on a fear level this can generate the impression of everything going to pieces, everything falling apart around you. And in a sense that becomes like the sensation because a human being has to establish its idea of comfort and identity in relationship to the perspective that it has in the environment, and if all of a sudden perspectives that you’re familiar with start to lose their grip because something else is coming in that kind of sweeps you up and causes you to see things in a greater wholeness, or overall way, that can create that image of that final dream that you had where everything is up in the air. It’s actually an interesting whirlwind.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: The Intangible Side

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