Veering Away

scmOne of the great challenges of undertaking a spiritual journey is that almost nothing in the culture today supports it. Even friends and family likely don’t fully understand it. So when we find ourselves away from where we have our spiritual center, we can be knocked off our alignments and feel the disconnection that causes. And that disconnection can feel like depression or grief, or any number of states away from our well being. Yet it is also a good test for us because the nature of the work is to find a way to hold a state within us no matter where we are or what we do. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: I don’t know if I had one dream several times, or if I just kept trying to figure something out, so it felt like it repeated.

But it felt as though I were going to my left to, it’s actually a silver pod, but I think of it as a person and maybe even the commander of something, maybe a conflict that’s going on. And I go there and touch base with this like, let’s call it a pod person, because it’s just a silver pod really, large one, and then I go out to kind of fight the battle.

But part of me realizes that the battle is already lost. It’s almost like we’ve all been infected with something. So the battle is already lost, it’s just we’re going through the motions. And I know it, but it’s almost like you’re doing it even though you know it. And it felt like that dream just kind of repeated because I was trying to figure something out.

John: Yeah, you can’t figure it out. You’ve been corrupted. The example of a pod is a container. So what’s happening is you’re veering to the left, and you’re warping, you’re going out of twang by going to the left. And you realize that you’re deviating, but you can’t do anything about it. You can’t pull back to the center anymore.

And that becomes your new container, or container that’s infected, and that infection then is something that you have to contend with as your new way of having to relate, and to be, and there’s nothing that you can do about it.

That’s what happens whenever you get around your dad over a period of time that’s over five or six days. You become corrupted, you get warped, you go off on a tangent, you speed up, everything becomes miserable, you don’t even like yourself. The environment takes on a tangent.

And then if you look at what your dad does to contribute to it, he says little things, you know, little by little he slowly – doesn’t mean it – but over a course of time his depression takes over, his sadness. There’s a subtle infection confusion, and delirium, in all of that, and that becomes part of the atmosphere, and what happens is when that gets in the atmosphere, when that finally becomes the motif of the environment, then that causes things to continue to break down. And when it happens, you eventually buy into the energetic in which there’s no meaning to anything.

I already probably have a certain degree of that to have to contend with, in that I don’t believe that the systems that man has created are going to hold up. And I realize that is not necessarily a shared belief, that that’s just an observation that I have about things – that over time keeps proving itself right. But that is the degree to which I demoralize the situation, and I take the beating for having that, you know, which is not something that I necessarily like to have, but one has because I don’t accept the collective as having any answers.

A person who has only that to look to, has to put the best spin on things, and has to fight that sort of thing to keep themselves from being further demoralized when they already are feeling despair, and so they’re trying to create the alter ego to that.

The only thing that keeps you alive, that gives life in the outer value, is the inner awakening and realization of the aliveness of something that is called manifestation. And that that is where the ecstasy, that is where the surprise is at. It’s not what one does here. What one does here is all a type of deceptive lie, that one plays, that keeps one separate from this quality of an aliveness that is an ecstasy, that is an incredibleness, that we are intertwined with, that we cannot break ourselves from – but we do. And when we break ourselves from it, we take some shadow of that aliveness and try to make something out of it in an outer context, and that is what we call life. And it is a deadness, it is a dyingness, it is an illusion, and we live that illusion.

So when you throw that away, when you catch up with that in order to have any meaning in terms of being here, you have to catch up with the aliveness that is in everything in the environment around. Well, that’s really, really hard to do when everything around you is portraying that it is in a deluded, and wayward, state, and that everything around you is buying into some mood, or motif, that is prevailing. And if you buy into that mood or motif that is prevailing, then you go into the same kind of despair and you lose all sense of heartfelt meaning, a heartfelt meaning that you don’t really have very well as it is because you can’t get out of your own way in relationship to how it is that things are affecting you in the outer, that keep you in a type of despair, that is to the degree to which you buy into the direness of all of that, instead of seeing through all of that to the aliveness that is all of manifestation.

Now people who even buy into or see the aliveness that’s all of manifestation suffer and grieve a lot because they see that all of the tones, and the moods, and the mannerisms, that exist that have gone off on a tangent separate from the overallness of manifestation, have, in a sense in other words, there is a removal of the causation that holds this order of manifestation together – that is who we are, really.

When we have gone away from that then, we have broken the linkage that keeps something from being able to come into its full beauty and glorification. And so if you are a person that’s inclined to go into seeing that, and then seeing it falling apart because the tone and the mood and the modality of the average human being is in a separateness that is creating a disarray vibration, continuously affecting the wholeness of life, then that can get you, too.

Your dream is saying that you’re being swayed off to the pod, the pod’s off on one side, and that there’s something about the pod that’s infected – and there’s not a darn thing you can do about it.

And so the dream is telling you why it is that you are the way you are – all of a sudden. The thing about it is because we are having to contend or resolve things, and this is an aspect of something you have to go through, it’s nice that you have the dream world pointing that out. But because your dream is intended to help you, to heal you, and you remembered it, and in the remembering of it comes the solution as well – as a general rule.

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