We know well that it happens in waking life, but it’s interesting that we can be frustrated and annoyed in our dream life, too. But the frustration is with ourselves, because we are all the characters in our dreams. And that’s why dreams repeat, or why images can go from walking casually down a street to running away from a zombie as fast as we can: for us to really make progress toward what we are trying to accomplish, we have to have full agreement within us. For every part of us that doesn’t agree with the “new” agenda, we’ll face a struggle in the journey. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
Jeane: So, in my dream, it feels like initially there is something going on in the dream, but there comes a point in the dream when I want to pull an energy through. It’s almost like I want to pull it through sideways, like it would go through the heart, right, but sideways. But there’s a clairvoyance missing.
Because of that clairvoyance missing, I can’t pull the energy through. So then I start trying various things, whether it’s a setting, or a dialogue, or changing this or changing that, but even though there might be something I can do I seem to reject doing it because, without that clairvoyance there, it feels like it’s not really going to work.
And I’m so frustrated with that, and all the things I’m trying to do to shift it, that I forget the details of the dream because the annoyance at that point gets in the way.
John: You’re using the word clairvoyance to describe the condition that I would call a kind of letting go. As you were telling the dream, I was thinking of the question: what is the purpose of meditation and the dhikr? And the whole purpose of that is for it to enable a person to be in a space in which the connection to the greater parts of themselves can just flow through.
And so the flowing through can be an energetic flowing through and, to the degree to which that might be inaccessible, there will be some degree of barrier then, or veil, that one will experience as an impediment, or burden, or weight, or mood, or tone or something that is abiding, so to speak, upon the heart.
When that is let go of, when the dhikr breaks through that, when the meditation is able to take you beyond that, all that it’s really doing is causing a letting go. That’s all that’s taking place is you’re dropping some way that you’re carrying yourself and, when you do, when the loudness of however it is that you carry yourself goes away, something else is able to be there. It just kind of fills that space.
It fills the space. It has always filled the space. It’s just that you pushed it out. It’s just that in a loudness of one’s self, or a mannerism, or a quality that you can’t shake in terms of a tone or mood, you’re pushing something away. And the contractive nature always does that, too, and so it seems especially difficult when one has to contend with, and identify in a way with, the effects of a contraction which means that when you have contraction there is something dying, or going away, in terms of life itself, or isn’t meaningful any longer and so is on its way out.
You have that, too, you can get all contangled and wrapped up in that, as opposed to just being able to let it go. It’s hard to let things go when they have an indulgence, when the indulgence of that is so overwhelming.
So the dilemma you’re creating is that you’re sitting in a spatiality in which there is this quality of flow, and you’re trying to relate that, or denote that, for yourself with the dream elements, or the whiftiness that exists in a feathered way, that portray the same thing. It’s those aspects that tend to add a symbolism, that tend to make it palpable, because it can be maybe too transcendent to be experienced energetically.
Yet it can be understood energetically, as well as symbolically. It’s just that the tendency is the story, or the symbolism, tends to make it more alive in terms of one’s graspability. It does that up to a point, but there comes a point when you function without that. And so you’re functioning more closely to what is coming in, as a connectivity, from these levels of yourself – because that’s really what is in flow.
That’s really what is sweeping over you. To begin with it’s a type of mitigation, but if it’s totally swept away as it’s swept away, as you come to recognize more and more qualities of yourself opening up, it can come across as a kind of clairvoyance where you’re still trying to steer it in some fashion, but it’s not a clairvoyance, it’s the natural flow of your beingness on some level that you hadn’t noticed before. So, as this is happening, as you’re seeing this, there’s a note of frustration instead of ecstasy in this.
In other words, a heart that is afflicted in some fashion is going through a definition, is still holding onto a separation. Whenever the heart feels an affliction, the way that affliction is to be understood is that it is something that is over, that’s meant to be let go of. Yet when a human being tends to feel the affliction, they contract and try to contend with that. They don’t have a quality by way of letting go or, you know, they haven’t chopped through that effect, so to speak, that a dhikr helps do; when done properly, you’re holding yourself in this other spatiality.
Now what is this other spatiality that you’re holding yourself in? It’s the spatiality in which the soul resides. It’s an overallness that takes in the whole, but you’re not able to be in that if you’re caught in something else, and are finding yourself sorting things out in relationship to the something else. And that something else would be whatever it is that is touching the heart, or causing the heart to have a certain blur about it. In other words, it’s not as effulgent as it could be.
That’s the key point. When you get into a condition where you’re having to contend with something in which there’s an aspect of frustration, or an aspect of trying to sort something out yet, where you don’t feel like you’re quite getting the full memo, and you’re acting, up to a certain degree, conditionally, then a part of you dwells on that, and gets caught in a reverb of that, and isn’t able to take the vibration and let everything that can flow through that vibration – in terms of all the levels of inflection. It’s not quite able to let that happen because you’re caught in the reverb of it.
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