The Limitation

butterfly_rockKnowledge and understanding of a spiritual path and process can be a fascinating endeavor, but it is not the point. A spiritual scholar may be further from the real connections than an illiterate farmer who has never read a book, but who is pure in his intentions. Yet, because we are a brain-centric culture, we can think that the more knowledge we amass the better it will be for our journey. Such knowledge can also be an escape away from the true work of a spiritual quest, which is the letting go of attachments to what we think we know, and connecting to, and being with, what is. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So, in my meditation dream, I see this image again that I had in another dream. It’s kind of like a repeat, and I didn’t know what to make of it I guess, in the other dream, other than seeing it and still remembering it. But the repeating component is, I came to see that what is in life, in terms of its essence, when the image existence explodes.

In other words, it just blows up. In other words, it doesn’t maintain its continuity. It just goes kapoof. It loses its structure. Now it can be a vibrational reflection, but then again even that can blow up.

So what I saw did not have to have a physical beingness. I wasn’t on that level, with a vibrational reflection and light level. In other words, what was happening was in seeing this I’m on a different level, that’s not necessarily in a level of manifestation, because in manifestation you see everything as having a form, you know, you see the myriad of things wherever your eyes look.

In this place it was like a vibration comes up, it has a reflection, the reflection goes poof. In other words, it’s no longer something you’d dwell up on, and that split-second thing leaves you with something. You denote from this the essence or something. It’s like putting your finger upon a beingness that is all effusive when it explodes like this. Or, in other words, the way I am trying to describe this is, in this split second where something does that, if you were in this loci in a physical way, that would be what is called an inflection, or a sudden knowingness, about something, or a light bulb moment. But in a loci where that sort of thing is outside of a plane of density, it’s a density there as the pulsation itself.

In other words, on this level, to have the light bulb moment or the inflection is considered wonderful, but on that aspect of one’s self to have something brought through like that, and then you see it and then it explodes, you’re limited. You are limited because the degree to which you saw that and everything, and what happened there, and what you made out of all of that limits you.

So what I saw on this level, to dwell upon that, would be to be dense. In other words, now I’m reconciling the two levels, that there is a way of looking at things, and understanding everything, because this is what happens when light can go kapoosh like this. In other words, you have to be a light that is similar to what you were trying to do in your drawing. You have to be a light that comes in, in an expansive way, and can fill a container, and can fill it to such a degree that it exudes in terms of its auricness to the light of the world – and then can be breathed right back up.

But if you don’t, then you have a kind of knowingness that can get in your way because it doesn’t matter if you know. You can know everything and yet still not know what is real – which is this light and only this light. Even in this situation there has to be a letting go into the stillness instead of not just catching the light bulb moment, you know seeing it on this level where this light bulb moment is, where you can actually shake things through and understand something, there’s a limitation there.

And I was holding on – the opposite of letting go – to a stillness, so it was a density in terms of that loci way of being. The density in that loci has an unacceptable naff that, on this level, would be called a physical existence trance, exemplified in the outer collective of manifestation. It’s kind of hard to say, but what is seen in terms of being able to flash and inflect in the light a knowingness, because everything that’s there to be understood and known is in the light. And so to flash upon that, and to know that, is on this level inside of one’s self, outside of the physical density of things, is a limitation.

You can get caught in that. It’s a light. It seems like you can do this, but, on that level, when you take the physical out, it still is a beingness, and that beingness and the inflection to that, in terms of what is important on that loci, that would be no different than being caught up in the myriad of things in the outer in manifestation. You have to drop that, too.

So the reason for the dream is something bothered me about the inflections I saw yesterday. Now this happens a lot whenever I’m around something that’s elevated in its energy, or has the resonance in the atmosphere that’s elevated. I get into this state when there is a certain quality of a light that’s around in the atmosphere, and then what comes out of my stillness, in terms of reading the light, can have a certain knowingness.

And that’s inflective in that aspect of light, but there’s so much more. You don’t have to do that. Doing that actually takes you away from your heart, little by little. Although I like that sort of thing as kind of a cloak of knowing, it is, in terms of this loci that I visited, it is a barrier that is in the way of emptiness.

Or to put it bluntly, I exist on many levels. On this inner level I have a gross and dense holding on to flash images that leave me with an inflection from the essence. In this inner loci I have come to know that as draining my auric nature. I need to let go even further and release such a holding on to this sort of seeingness and knowingness. Such a seeingness gets in the way of the emptiness.

The heart rejoices when the split-second inflection is not a quality of a beingness that I have to embrace, because I know it, too, and from seeing how it is in this loci, I know that this, too, the split-second inflection is a holding on, instead of a letting go to an even deeper stillness.

And I recall even hearing a teacher describe this as being like an appearance of knowingness that is actually a stupidity and ignorance. The heart knows how to recognize this as being a denier of the stillness. It is an attachment to a need to know, and such a knowing gets in the way of the heart. This is a knowingness that is still denser than the heart and is, therefore, considered a mind that isn’t yet one.

And so I kept thinking, what do I describe this, what do you call this? Do you know what it’s called? It’s called the Solomon Complex. This was Solomon’s problem. He wrote all of the Psalms and all of the stuff in the Bible, and he was wise beyond wise, but did he actually experience that which he exuded out of the light? Did he actually fully revolve in that light?

To some degree, yes, but deep, deep scholars that really understand what this is supposed to be all about, in terms of the heart, do ponder to what degree. He came so close, yet so far. And you can have people being around a teacher, and the teacher has this right breath, and this right space, and they can be attentive like in service like you wouldn’t believe, but can they and are they breathing in, really appreciating that breath that is right there in front of them? Of course, it’s always there in front of you because that’s really the only thing that’s going on – or you wouldn’t have manifestation.

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The Right Breath

im442It is said that everything breathes, in its own way – even the universe itself. As humans, we can breathe on many levels. We can breathe on the level of our lower self, purely for oxygen, and we can breathe at the level of our higher self as a way to attune ourselves to the energies and cycles of the the whole of things. One is only in sync with the physical aspects of the planet, and the other can bring us into sync with the fullness of the breath of creation itself. One is limited in its possibilities, and the other is not. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: The only other dream I remember, it’s like I was dreaming about the TV show “The Blacklist” with James Spader, and so it’s like his daughter and I are in one room and we want him to come, I don’t know whether it’s to help or whatever, but he’s in another room and he’s been tied up. He’s been captured and tied up, so he can’t come.

And it feels like anything else that happens in that dream has that same kind of energy, like we want something to be occurring but the person is not there, or they’re not available, or they’re bound up in some way.

John: Yeah, that’s adding more information to the situation, in that you have your identifications, and you sense your limitations. And, as you were telling that, I kept realizing one needs to say more about what that is in terms of the light; in other words, how is it that you breathe out light and then sweep that all back up again? How do you do that?

Well, this is done when you let go, and if, for example, you don’t have joy and you feel in pain by things, and you’re not able to touch life, you’re not able to be with the wholeness of things, in your out-breath you’re out-breath won’t be rejoicing. Your out-breath, as you’re breathing down, it won’t have an exhilaration quality to it.

This is what was behind teaching this, he was teaching this through a practice. He started off by going hah, hah, hah, and everybody laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing. And can you do that without it being forced? Can you actually literally let go to where everything is that kind of exhilaration, and joy, and exuding?

If you can, if you’re able to do that, that’s why laughter is so interesting because in the laughter is a letting go, and is something that propels, a true laughter, one that’s just a true belly laugh, propels into the outer a vibration of letting go. In other words, a laughter is a laughter because it takes and what it sees as a heaviness it is able to let go, and not let its mind get caught up in it. And it’s able to let go in a way so that the subtler aspects of the heart can see something, or are able to be subtle enough to see something so much more in terms of an overallness. And it has this tingle of laughter to it when it can do that.

You can’t laugh when you’re dead serious and you’re completely in your mind. There’s no laughter in that. You know, you can’t be distracted or anything because you’re all caught up then. But if you can just suddenly drop that, there is that laughter and that laughter effuses itself into the outer.

Now the reason why that heals things, laughter heals, is in that laughter there’s something kind of cosmic that happens in that the other person then breathes that in – and it relieves them. Do you see how big the breath is, the in-breath and the out-breath? They may start out as if they are individual lights, but they actually take in the wholeness of all that there is.

And so a person who is able to laugh and break the density, and the heaviness, of things, and it’s a genuine laugh, then it effuses into the atmosphere as another person in-breathes. It effuses into the atmosphere the breathing in of light. They breathe in a light and they can get it. They then are healed in a way in which they can let go of whatever the heaviness is that they had been carrying, only for a split second. I mean the laughter goes and then you’re back into breathing in the multiplicity of things that vie for attention, and you resort back to the fallback position of trying to grapple with that with your mind – and then your mind shuts off the heart.

That is why the training is generally a training towards working with the mind, to get the mind from grappling in its density. And then, when you do that, the process of doing that, the subtleness behind that, is the heart. You fall into the heart.

So that’s why you have all these breath practices, but nobody knows what they’re doing in the breath practice. Now the thing that is interesting is after the hah, hah, hah, then when he said okay, now without saying anything, feel that, inside yourself, as an out-breath. And you could feel that. You could feel yourself bringing down an expansive lightness, an auric light.

And then he said, okay, now breathe it back out, now breathe it in, and when you did that it’s exhilarating. And what you would find when you breathe like that is that you now are able to let go. That is what’s letting go, and what is it letting go of? It’s letting go of the mind, it’s stopping the mind.

And what are you experiencing? The essence of the soul, or the essence that is so subtle that it takes in the heart, and the heart takes in the world. Everything in the world is put in the heart. Only what is there in the world? There’s only this innerness which is this light.

In other words, the essence is this quality in which you bring something down which is everything, all that there is, in an out-breath. But if you don’t know that then how can you breathe it back in as light? And if you can do that, then there’s nothing ever going on. And then you go around able to have some experience, but you are having the experience with this quality of breath.

It’s the right breath. It’s the one breath. It’s the only breath. It’s the breath upon which everything is. It’s the one thing. You know, when Rumi makes his poems he talks about maybe there being 99 things that a person can do, and they can do all of those well. In other words, you can breathe down a certain momentous energy, and you can try to steer, and direct that in some sort of capacity, in a way that bicycles around in the myriad of things, maybe do 99 different things really, really well – but that’s not what you’re here to do.

What you’re here to do is to let go, to get into that breath, that quality, that condition that takes you to the emptiness. That’s what is meant behind those three words: Jalal, which is the masculine, which is the out-breath. Jamal, which is the feminine in-breath. Kamal is where you don’t need either one of them. They have come together as one, as a stillness, as an emptiness.

And to put that into words when that has happened, for there to be the emptiness or the stillness, that is because you’re only breathing light out, light in, inner coming into outer, and then that touches everything and gets swept right back up again. That’s how you’re supposed to breathe. You’re connected like that.

And so the key is to have all of it coming down, all of it going back, all of it coming down, all of it going back. And the out-breath and the in-breath come together as just a will of light, rolling in the light.

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The Mission

m69The next time we have the urge to complain about some aspect of our looks, or the way our body feels, or is working, we can remember this: our body is merely a vehicle that makes our spiritual journey possible. We are not meant to worship it, glorify it, or spend all our time honing it and refining it. We are meant to use it to build our spiritual presence. In that sense, any sort of body will do. And, you could make the case that, a gorgeous body is much more likely to distract you from your mission than an average one might. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: So, in my first dream, I’m like struggling with some shapes, and the best way I could describe the shape it’s like if you’ve seen those… oh, they’re kind of like art objects that are two pieces of plastic, or glass, that are filled with sand, and then maybe some air and some water and, as you move them around, the shape changes inside/

So, I’m struggling with some shape like that where there’s some wavy lines, and it looks like a substance inside the square, and I’m trying to make this whole square fit in some way, or the portions that are inside the square fit – and I just can’t get it right. It’s like I’m so frustrated. I just keep trying to work with getting this shape to fit with some other shape, or getting it to shift in some way I want it to shift. And I just couldn’t get the proportions or the shape to fit right.

John: So what you were doing is you were constantly trying to define a border in which there was something within.

Jeane: Yes.

John: That’s what you were doing: constantly trying to define the border.

So the way the nothingness, a true nothingness, in other words, not a nothingness that’s still a mental term. In other words, the way something is not an essence is that it has to draw itself a form, and, when it draws itself a form, it has boundaries within that form, just like the soul has a form in terms of the body. It, then, as an emptiness, as a stillness, as a oneness, it then has something kind of defined, so to speak, in that it is now in a composited, defined, drawn caricature, or form.

But, just like a person who knows how to draw images, when you draw the form there is a huge relief in relationship to the overall because now you have something to contend with, or to work with – but something is still missing in terms of what can be the rest of it? In other words, the rest of the lines and everything else within this boundary.

Because first you have it, and then you have to have something within. So now what you’re talking about is within that has to be, somehow or another, the emptiness yet, or the total stillness.

Well, it kind of defies logic that when you draw a form that you have taken something out of a wholeness, and now you need to fill it in. That’s how the mind would work, in terms of the multiplicity. Now it’s going to have to finish the image. The key is to be able to be in the outer of things without having to be identified with some separate form, as if that’s the end all, be all that you have to navigate, function, in terms of.

So, what you’re trying to do is you’re trying to work with this chemistry of light, where you see things in whatever it is as a form, but how do you get that to be accepted, or okay? So that means you have to be in the emptiness that you came from.

So the way this works with the breath is you actually breathe in light on out-breath. You have to first of all breathe out the essence of the coming down, which is the seed of things from somewhere in the wholeness of all that there is. The out-breath goes into the caricature, and you have to breathe in that light. And, when you do that, you can be empty.

So for a poor human being that has suddenly taken on the notion of a definition, like a meaty border of themselves, somehow or another the fact of doing that has caused a conceptualization to get established, and you find yourself now contending with whatever it is that you, through your senses, see yourself as being in terms of a density.

But that isn’t how you’re meant to be. You’re meant to be a physical body that holds their soul, a soul that is everything, and so you have come into this caricature, but you’re not going to identify with the caricature so that you get lost in the myriad of things. So you come in with a mission, and the mission is an out-breath that breathes, and feels itself, exuding the light within, from somewhere else, into this beingness.

Not only does it exude the light into the beingness, but that light, then, because of the lightness of things, and because you can take yourself outside of a heaviness, or gravity, you can then aurically expand. You’re not just that caricature. Those who identify with the caricature can’t, but you can aurically expand.

And so then you breathe all of this back in on an in-breath, and you’re breathing back in the light – so there’s nothing going on. There really isn’t anything going on. The caricature is just there as a kind of blueprint design. You’re not that physical body. You’re there in order to create the means by which to move around, by which to have a methodology, a dialogue, a seeing and a hearing.

But it’s a very challenged seeing and hearing because it’s not supposed to be a seeing and hearing that is correlated to identifying whatever it is that you have as a caricature. You’re meant to have the caricature that you can move around with, but you move around with that in relationship to a breath that brings something in, and a breath that sweeps back with it.

It’s a breath except, in terms of sorting it out, the question then is: which part of the breath were you breathing? Well, first of all you have the caricature and I guess you’re struggling with what all is inside the caricature. So in that regard it’s an out-breath, the seed of that, because you then have to breathe it back into its proper state, an in-breath.

So it’s got to be light coming down and touching light, and light rising up. It is the light. You’re breathing light out, bringing it down as light from the wholeness of it all, and then breathing it back in. You breathe anything other than that, it’s a density, it’s a diversity. It’s still a mind, or a confusion, or a separation.

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