Archive for February, 2019

oil-refinery-900In our spiritual journey, and in our dreams, we are trying to connect to an inner level, a level of the unconscious, and bring it into consciousness. We can do this while awake if we are not too full in ourselves with the nonsense of daily life. We can do this with our dreams if we are able to remember them upon waking and gain the insights that they can offer us. And we can also get glimpses of the unconscious when we are in that in-between state, between waking and sleeping at night, and between sleeping and waking in the morning. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: There is a quality within that is ordinarily so repressed, and so pent up, that it’s like at a stop sign, or it is limited from flowing, because it has tones, moods, mannerisms, outer involvements, whatever you want to call it, that keep it from awakening as a presence of being.

For me it’s more of a type of flow and action. The way I approach that is, first of all, I’m starting to contend with a kind of hypnagogic as I’m falling into the stillness of meditation. Now this opening up happens in the hypnagogic of the falling asleep zone.

Now I’ve heard, of course, that the hypnagogic was both in the falling asleep and in the waking up, and had only been in touch with that as a quality of contending with the myriad of vibrations, and streamlining those myriad of vibrations, in the waking up process – or the hypnagogic coming from sleep to the senses again.

I am only recently coming to realize that the hypnagogic works in the going to sleep. And, when it works in that regard, it does take in the qualities of being able to recognize how something is meaningful in relationship to an unfolding revelation around you, or, in other words, like a translucent going to sleep imagery that has a vibration that can be deemed quite applicable to going from inner into outer.

The hypnagogic zone in the waking up is more like a zone that is coming in touch with an intertwinement kind of alignment. The hypnagogic when you are going into the stillness, and it is suddenly there before you’re somewhere deep, deep somewhere, is a zone in which there is the breakthrough of that stillness into the outer, or into life. In other words, it’s where the revelation is lived, so to speak, when the other is waking up.

And so my meditation dream, the way that came across was that I was able to tell, based upon the meditation dream, that what I’m going through within, or able to see from within, is connected to an innerness as a value, and I am able now to know the importance even when in the outer you’re not generally ready to notice the correlation, yet to live it you have to see the correlation that everything is part of this coming together.

And in this meditation dream I somehow know that, as strange as that may sound. To know what isn’t visible based upon an unwritten, and unfulfilled, essence, is a reaching to a connection that comes from within and touches the outer appearances. I am shown that I am able to live this inner essence in some aspect in the outer, in fact change that aspect in the outer, even though there’s no evidence other than the innerness in this hypnagogic that is visible.

The importance of an intertwined oneness is the dominant energetic of the dream. Appearances in the outer suggest that there is no reason to proceed any further, in other words, in terms of how things are without this other being there tweaking things in its own little unique way. In other words, what looks like a disconnect, discombobulated unfoldment is able to be, from deep within, intertwined to all that there is, or to what there is that’s meant to come into fruition at this time.

You can characterize it by saying that the day arrives where I need to make a choice. The choice I need to make is to the inner essence, seeable by the eyes of a subtle, all-pervasive connection. The situation is as follows, and so now I describe a scenario, and it’s from and through this scenario – in a hypnagogic way – that I was able to describe the above.

I am in possession of a value, that I need to access, that lies hidden in my beingness and the need exists for it to play a role in the outer. In the scenario, I possess a value, which is this ore deposit, that if shipped a great distance, which means that there’s no place to handle that locally, it will lose too much of its essence, because to ship it a great distance kills the awakening, and it kills what’s possible. It drains the life’s blood out of it.

What is needed is a refinery that’s nearby, that’s inclusive, to work with this, so that it can retain more of the value of its inner essence. So, in the scenario, I am shown how it is possible to bring that connection to a greater closeness, or how to go about a nearby refinery as it is in an outer appearance, in order to protect and facilitate the inner revelation, in terms of coming through.

So the meaning is, is to be able to see this, what has taken place as one is going into the stillness, I’m able to see, and dream, how to connect to an intertwined essence which predominates; in other words, it’s a hidden innerness, but I know how to flow with it, or bring it to the surface into manifestation. I’m able to do this based upon a connection I have, and therefore able to take this innerness and make the outer reflective.

See, ordinarily, when you’re waking up, when it’s the hypnagogic of waking up from a deep sleep, or stillness, back to the senses, the outer is reflective at you, as something as a glancing back, so to speak, kind of waking up.

That’s what the sensation is like, and that’s the flow and the motion, when you are having the hypnagogic state of coming from the stillness back into waking up, or coming back into a strange kind of waking up, which is back to the senses. And, as you come back to the senses, you have that reflective to the inner.

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spiritual-psychology-finalWhen we speak of letting go in a spiritual journey, it is because many of the psychologies and defense mechanisms we have established in ourselves prevent us from being who and what we truly are.  We all know the moment when we say or do something that, in retrospect, we know isn’t really us. Well, the universe needs us to really be “us,” in the sense that we are not operating from old wounds, but from an openness and ability to respond to what is actually happening in the moment. And we can let go of those barriers when we understand that they are not useful to our journey, and we put them down, gently, every time they arise in us, replacing them with our greater purpose. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So, in the meditation dream, I come to look at life as if I’m able to see it through the eyes of how chess is, like a chess game. So I proceed through a series of chess games, and the energetic theme is for me to see the process in which the energetic aliveness can be truly there.

So first there is kind of like the dream in which there has to be a defined winner or loser, you feel the intensity of that. And so when it has to be like that, clear distinctions like that, the heart is going to get hurt. It’s going to hurt, and the result is apt to be a lasting wound that will take a long time to recover from.

And it doesn’t matter whether the wound is a stab or a victory. Either way you carry something that is outside of a simple process and intertwined flow, and, when you carry that, the idea of a kind of a coming together is denied for a long, long time.

And then two, there is the game, the chess game, that is played for fun – but a lot of apprehension exists because of a fear over the outcome. In other words, to embarrass yourself, or you won’t hold up to a certain ideal or whatever, which, of course, then that as you can see is another limitation that’s imposed upon the heart.

And then there is the compromised game, that is played off to one side, in which what happens is deemed to have a significant meaningfulness, and that there are consequences. This, too, hurts the heart because there is no freedom.

And then there is the game that’s played reluctantly because to not play the game seems to be another kind of compromise. In this game, there’s a part of myself that is holding back and is defensively veiled.

Finally, there is the game that is played in the center of the road for all to see. There are no handlers. There is just a focus and attention. There is no winner or loser, just the experiencing of that which is unfolding. In this game, the energetic intertwines as an extension of each person who is putting their heart on the line, and a graciousness, thereby, predominates.

However, the aliveness will be lost if there is some sort of definition, such as the need to keep score, which creates a separation from that naturalness of the inner and outer one beingness. So what I’m talking about is, in terms of the fifth game, is it’s a game that’s rarely played. The reason is because all of the other games are designed around a saving-face limitation. These are compromises. They are like a compromise, a fear, or an aspect of ego in each of those games and, in those games, the heart suffers under a veil in some fashion or another.

It’s just this final game where the heart is placed on the table, or in this case in the center of the road for all to see, that something is different in terms of now a greater overallness. You’re actually more free in this game right. The other dreams are holding onto, or holding out, as if there is a definable truth. They all have burdens: a) the game is never played, is a burden. I mean that was one aspect that I didn’t mention earlier. The game is never played. In other words, it had been played once upon a time. There’s a memory of it, and so then the weakness, but you allow a weakness to thus predominate in life, or b) if the game is a duel, then a duality predominates as a broken half truth, or c) if there is fear, then the letting go gets lost, and d) if there are conditions, then the openness is lost.

So if I feel I am compelled, or forced, to play because I cannot stand the alternatives, such a reluctancy presides for what is truly possible. Okay, so the bifurcation. The freedom is only when all the choices are on the table for all to see, no matter what happens, so that there is no winner or loser, an out in the open wonderment, then, and only then, can the free flow embrace the heart. All other approaches carry an attention that goes outside the heart and lead to an estrangement in some way or another.

So now I have to progress this. So when I come to bed the first thing that happens is I have to denote that from the meditation dream there were memories of having been restrained by denseness and darkness. It’s actually visualized in a sleep dream as a type of darkness. And those memories haunt me as if very fresh to my being.

The first part of my sleep dream is about having to contend, having to be afflicted, finding myself afflicted, trying to sort out, trying to mitigate whatever such limitations, and the progress in denoting, or trying to see how I’m denoting, a progress that I’m slowing making that work as part of working this out.

The result is a demeanor that takes on a quality, takes on a limitation, in that you can still have a stigma about yourself in which there’s a part that refuses to be denied. In other words, if you’ve broken through to some degree, that refusal to be denied is like an entitlement. For example, I push to the front of lines and feel that I’m entitled to get an early jump on crossing the street or something. I’m like this because the repressed conditions that I have a memory of, or are accustomed to being under, have left a mark upon my beingness. I have trouble letting go and being completely natural as a result of such suppressions of the past.

Well the reason for the dream is the barriers I faced in my formative years have left a stigma on my nature. I used to play chess for the inner enjoyment it offered. My innocence got compromised at an early age and, as a result, I have an edginess about me that gets in the way of letting go and trusting in a natural inner free flow. In the meditation dream I identify a number of the nuances that have affected me. The vibratory wounds are like a memory which makes it difficult to let go and accept the openness, and vulnerability, needed to bring the overallness of my nature into life.

And so this meditation dream revelation is, I was meant to realize that I need to be fearless and open to all of life as an open book for all to see and reach,meaning, or suggesting, and indicating, and pointing out that I’m not yet able to let go to an inner free flow where all is well. Or, to put it more bluntly, woundology memory is still stigmatizing.

So what that indicates is to let go of barriers I impose in the outer is something I am able to vibrationally recognize as a need on an inner dream level. So I’m able to see the need of taking this, as a degree of inner to outer awareness, to the next step. And, of course, the next step is living it, but I do not yet live it because I have a ways to go in letting go. I am still watching the way the defense mechanisms are haunting my overall beingness. It is as if I am still in a kind of rebellious teenage phase, so to speak, not yet ready to be me.

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Logo-ColorThe image of giving birth in a dream is a powerful one, because not only has something new been made possible – in the dreamer – but, like any new life, the babies are vulnerable and need to be protected. So what has awakened, i.e., been born, needs to be nurtured by the dreamer so that the new aspect becomes part of the dreamer’s life and ongoing processes. But, of course, different parts of us want a say in the matter, and that resistance can appear as being hunted, or chased, in a dream. The new is always at risk until it has grown strong enough to stand on its own. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: So, in my dream, I seem to be around some family, but I’m almost like in a foreign country, at least some place that seems not like home. And I’m pregnant, and I’ve given birth to a daughter and then, after a delay, I give birth to a smaller baby that’s a son. You know, pretty much all in the same time frame.

And right after giving birth to the son, it’s like I’ve left the place where I am and I’ve gone with a man and a woman that are with me to another home, just a short walk away, because people are hunting me. They seem to want me and the babies.

And then I can hear they’re coming to that house, so I walk back through the woods with my friends to where I gave birth, to the original house, because they’d already searched that. And there’s a convertible there, which is not ideal, but that’s what I feel like we can all make our getaway in. It’s just I have to go into the room first and very quickly sort through what I’ll take with us and the babies.

And then I think I get in the backseat with the babies because they’re taking me somewhere else. Well, where they take me, it feels like I must put the babies down somewhere, and then I’ve gone into this large dining hall, and I almost have the sense I’m in an embassy or something, but it does have this huge dining hall with a lot of people in it.

And once I’m at this embassy-type situation, you have been around, but you’ve gone out to check out a living situation. It feels like you’ve gone to check out a hotel or something, that’s in the city, about whether or not that’s where we can go next. And I don’t seem to want anybody to know what’s happened, or what we’re doing next, so I’m in the dining hall acting normal.

And like somebody comes up to me and mentions that there’s all this speculation that something rough must have happened, because I think they found the room where I’d been with the babies and it was all roughed up or something, and I say, no, it was just an easy birth and the babies are resting now.

I’m just not like giving anything away to anybody because it’s almost like I want to just create this kind of normal façade until we can get to where it is that we’re going next. That’s pretty much the whole dream.

John: So the theme of the dreaming, last night, was that there comes a time, after the catching up with something on an inner level as images, or as qualities, of beingness that this somehow has to inflect into everything else in life.

And so, the masculine way of dreaming it would be to look at it as if there is a systemology, or ten-point plan or something, aspects, you know, levels or something.

The feminine way of dreaming it is that she sees in her nature that she carries something, or holds something, or sustains something, that she feels as an atmosphere, in the atmosphere. Well, she feels it, but then there’s more than just being able to just note it and feel it, so the dream starts off in which you’re in a house in which the atmosphere is conducive to catching up with this quality within.

And so you give birth to something that has a wholeness, both a masculine and a feminine quality. But you can’t stay in this house, so, when you go out of this house, are you able to take this quality, and the atmosphere, are you able to take that with you into the outer, into physical manifestation, so to speak?

And what you’re finding is that, to the degree to which you aren’t doing so, you’re haunted by parts of yourself that can have the understanding, so to speak, of what this inner depth is, can have the understanding in some sort of, we’ll say, subconscious level or something. But in terms of in the outer still it comes across as if something is still affecting you, or haunting you, or throwing you around. But because you have the effect, in a kind of subconscious level, it is almost like you have the inflections of how to go back to how it is that you are able and meant to be. In other words, it’s like you’ve got the masculine and feminine invisible sides of yourself that are kind of like hinting, or causing, you to function inflectively, even though you have issues that you’re not able to quite live and contend with. You’re not able to live this, so you’re still contending with something as if it is still haunting you.

What you’re talking about, in the end, is a realization that what is happening, from the sense that you have from deep within, that if you brought that through totally into the outer that would be a letting go. It would have the sensation of a letting go, as opposed to reacting to this, or that, yet, as if something is still haunting you.

And so, in the dream, the way you’re understanding it, is that you’re not going to be making any big deal out of anything in particular, you know, everybody likes the racket, and the doingness, and the carrying on, the so-to-speak news report of things, and you’re not buying into that because to buy into that serves no useful purpose.

So you’re almost catching up with what it really means to just let go, and that such a letting go then becomes a taking of that which is latent in your nature into a livability in the outer. That’s pretty interesting.

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