Dreaming into Knowing

We’ve had the experience that when we feel tired, or overstretched, normal procedures become more difficult. Energetically, it means our normal energetic shield, which protects us, is weak. That makes us susceptible to any and all energies around us, which could mean lower emotions, or moods, or even colds. And rather than us being in the oneness of ourselves, in our strength, we are scattered and no single part of us is in charge. That means any part of us can take over, and then anything can happen. If we recognize this happening, we can make an intention to proceed carefully, while we reconnect to the things that are important to us to re-arm our shield.  (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So that’s the meditation stuff in which there was something about my nature that was all too catatonic yesterday, and all askew. And so when I come to bed, it’s rather late, and so I have a sequence of dreams that have to do with there being bits and pieces out of place. And I kept throwing it off, and throwing it off, until one of them seems like more important to maybe try to discuss, or look at, and so write it up.

And what is happening in this image is, it’s like I’ve initially walked into like a catalytic area, like a cafeteria, and then I realize the person I am with is interested in getting something to eat, or I’m suddenly with someone and if they’re interested in getting something to eat. I don’t need anything to eat because I’m not really hungry, but it seems to be part of the protocol to have to be part of all of this environment.

So I go and I get some soup. It’s a little awkward even for me to go and get soup because I’m not really in that condition, either. And so, because I didn’t want much, I turn away from this food counter area quicker and look back into the dining room. And there seem to be teenagers at every table, which means that I’m kind of in a daze as to where to sit. In other words, this is a reflection of my parts scattered all over the place.

And suddenly I notice my friend is behind me, he’s gotten something, whatever it is, and he’s just kind of waiting to see what table I select. I don’t really care what table I get. I just don’t see a table, and there’s no space that opens up for me because, somehow or another, my parts are still scattered all over the place, which means I don’t feel comfortable in the area. Nor do I know how to select a table now.

And so, I’m at an impasse, with no opinion one way or another. But I would normally have an opinion if I was grounded; but I’m not grounded. My parts are too scattered around that I’m kind of demasculated or washed out.

In other words, this is something that, in what is occurring, is the opposite of before where I had kind of a loud and outspoken mannerism. Now it’s more like I’ve stopped, or exhausted, myself, and now where do I stand? Where do I pick up the pieces again?

So it’s a dream that indicates that, when I wear myself out, I go the other extreme and let go of a semblance of balance of self, so I do not know how to conduct myself. And what happens is, when in an extreme, I don’t realize either that I’m not conducting myself in the ordinary environment; just taking into account everything that happens in the environment in an ordinary way.

And so then when I settle back I’m also out of balance, in terms of the equanimity of my being, as well, so I need to find the attentitiveness that is meant to be, for myself and others, where there is a letting go of indulgences. Which means, again, this is a quality in which you’re holding a space is what you really are. You’re able to hold a space, and you don’t hold the space by being overt about it, nor do you hold the space by totally going insipid, getting washed out.

So if you’re too loud about something, in a way it’s okay to be loud about something if that’s what’s necessary to cause an attention – but can you stop? You have to at some particular point completely unplug. You have to be able to be in a way so that the situations of life, that are unfolding around you, remain, and can stay, in their natural order. But if you go off in any kind of way you’re not necessarily taking into account the position of things.

So anyway, it’s another kind of letting go, rather than trying to figure out what is going on. That’s very interesting. Under a similar token, the way the dreams were meant to be, is I am meant to notice the tea leaves as well, but it’s the tea leaves in terms of visibility. When the visibility is there, let go of it. Let it sort itself out. If it doesn’t sort itself out like it should, it’s not meant to short itself out the way I see it to have to be. And consciousness isn’t there for it to be like that. And if it’s a bastardization yet, then it’s a bastardization yet; but that’s as good as it gets.

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