Imagine what we might be like, as people, if we had never been hurt, or mistreated, or told we were not good enough, or if we had been given every positive opportunity, and an ideal education, without fears. We would have developed no psychologies that limit our freedom to express ourselves, purely, cleanly, as a life responding to life. We could just unfold like the flower of possibility we are. That is something like the sense we can reach if we let go, in our spiritual processes, and open ourselves up to the energetic wholeness of the universe. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
John: Like I say, the whole dreaming last night was process oriented, and what I did was all process oriented, too, in that it starts off in which, in the meditation dream, everything is presented before me, for all to see, is in physical manifestation. In other words, it’s like I start with everything, everything as manifestation, and yet I also know that there is more.
So to try to understand the roots of it all, the greater moreness of things, I even become like a type of genealogist. And suddenly I come to know that everything, that moreness, that which is more, that everything is light. And, for some reason, even though this should be apparent, in the dream, I hadn’t expected everything to be light. For some reason that blew a concept within, in terms of what I believed needed to unfold or correspond.
So as a result, a part of me was even rejecting, then, what I was seeing. And so to reject what I see when everything turned to light, now what? Well, I didn’t know what, what. It just wasn’t quite… you know, it just had to be something more, so I gave up. I gave up because everything that exists in the essence somewhere as light and, if that’s it, then there isn’t anything that remains which is tenable.
In other words, somehow part of me still wants to hold onto something tenable, or something more. I have no idea what that something more is that I’m anticipating, in other words, caught on this anticipation upon anticipation, but whatever it was, it wasn’t in keeping with whatever this conceptualization that I had in terms of how things unfold because it just went from manifestation to boom: all light. Nothing left. So with everything being light it became demoralized, in a way, and at a loss, in terms of where or how to turn to find what I still was seeking.
So what is going on is I wouldn’t know the truth if it was right in front of me, as plain as day. The reason is because I carry a context, somewhere deep within, of how this must be that I am not letting go of. In other words, something yet that I’m still sensing. I am veiling myself from seeing the essence right in front of me, which, in this case, is presenting itself as being light.
And the meaning is that, in my dream, in physical existence, everything reduces, everything becomes light, everything goes, and there’s nothing else but light. And so I’m not able to handle this because I am caught up in some sort of conceptual questing.
To be like that is to be caught in a yes, but, kind of demeanor. Or to put the sensation I am still carrying in another way, I don’t know how to stop. And I don’t know how to let go. As a result of that, the meditation dream then is indicating that if I were to be at a point where there was nothing tangible to hold onto, as a beingness, I would still be at a loss because I am constantly expecting something else. Isn’t that an odd meditation dream?
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