Slow Learner

We all have our preferred ways of learning. Some tend to the dramatic to etch a lesson in their being. Others do better with a slow, nuanced and incremental journey. Either way can be successful, and both can have their dangers and pitfalls. Our dreams can serve to help us navigate these pathways by pointing out what is at play before we have to go through the drama or wasted time in real life. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In the meditation dream, I am shown that being off about things – like human beings start out in life as being – that this initial step is natural. It’s like it’s anticipated and recognized that everyone has to go through this initial step where they have to go out and be bewildered a bit. 

To continue to be off, when others around you are getting it to some degree, is actually better than going through spiritual illusions. In other words, there comes a point when you see that you’re off and then you can just start trying to make adjustments. Screen yourself as if you’re weaponizing or aiming yourself to the center of yourself. That actually leads, although it may be like a type of reflective to the heart because everything still is vying for the heart and whatnot, and it’s not finding itself in the total stillness and overallness of the heart, there’s to some degree yo-yoing – that’s spiritual illusion again and creating pacified arguments as to why this is better than the sheer density. 

And to a certain degree that is true. But, in the sheer raw energy density of things is something that is very, very loud to the heart. And if you really note and denote what that is doing to the heart, it can form a memorable quality to it that won’t settle for illusionary spiritual qualities either, when there’s so much more. 

So to continue to be out of it, and overly dense, I am shown, awakens a person quicker. This is a revelation that was a surprise to me that if you actually, so to speak, declare war on God and quit trying to do spiritual things or something like that, like I’ve done, you actually develop a keenness to hurting the heart, that others can toy with and kind of keep somewhat veiled. In other words, go at more slowly, circling it, so to speak, with their process. 

So I’m pondering the deeper meaningfulness of this vibration. I am noticing that to continue to be way off in demeanor, as if I am a slow learner, causes the heart to be where it must let go. And that slingshots a person to the inner depths of themselves. 

And so this is another way of looking at that: if you go to the depths of yourself, where you experienced the pain and declare war, so to speak, to try to maintain some sort of ignorance to too great of an extreme way because you lack common sense or something, you hold that, you create a memory to that, that becomes like a fine-tuning fork then to the subtler vibrations then in the other direction. But if you hold a balance, an equanimity, try to control the light or something you sit in between, you don’t really go to a deep, deep depth. 

This could be used as a criticism of those who just do practices, ceremonies and stuff like that as a type of pacifier – as opposed to really, truly getting into life. Those who utilize that sort of thing, see themselves as making spiritual progress and whatnot, but it’s measured, it has its parameters. 

So to try to be conscious leads to spiritual illusions, and results in not noticing the heart as being all important. See, the key thing is that when you delve into a certain depth like in a raw energy density or whatever of yourself, if you never do that, then you don’t recognize the importance necessarily of the heart. You don’t make it loud enough to know how you can really, really hurt it. And then that hurting reverberates and reverberates and can be used then to recognize subtler aspects that are caught on the breath that you might normally think are okay. 

That approach is not only self-deceptive, but is a harder mannerism to overcome than that of a person who is more dense for a longer period of time. There comes a point in time when you kind of gain an understanding of how to cope. It’s better that you don’t think that you know how to cope, it’s better that you continue to stay a little bit lost. In other words, more loudly in that, in order to break through it. And that’s the superior way.

When such a more dense person comes out of their stupor, such a person is more inclined to notice the wounded heart moreso in terms of its loudness than a person who is following a path towards consciousness and sees themselves as getting the subtleness of it all more and more. Such a person that is following the subtleness like this only appears to be getting closer. Such a person is actually building themselves up into believing in a spiritual illusion trance – as if it’s real, as if it’s going to take them somewhere. 

What I am saying is that a person is more compelled to hear the heart when they are obviously wayward in their way of being. They are able to get it more abruptly. A person who sees themselves as making progress step by step is more inclined to be left behind, rationalizing their actions as being meaningful.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: Slow Learner

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