Archive for the ‘In the Flow’ Category

2ee3wWe’ve all heard the phrase: no matter where you go, there you are. We know we can’t leave our problems and issues behind – they travel with us. Our energy can change the “vibe” at a party for good or for bad. And, as this dream shows, we can bring our energetic eccentricities into our sleeping life. This is all pointing to the importance of finding the stillness within ourself, something that we can always be in connection with, no matter the circumstance – because we know that external life is unpredictable. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So in my meditation dream, I’m aware of changes in the stillness, as if the stillness vacillates. In other words, it’s almost as if it’s a weather event. And so the stillness can kind of go up and down a little bit; it has a little motion to it.

So I came out of this dream a bit bewildered because this thing is vacillating up and down. And yet wondering, I want to go into the stillness, but it’s vacillating up and down a bit. And yet there is that stillness that predominates. There’s something in there that’s getting blown around.

So when I come out, I don’t come completely out, apparently, but I remember coming out and I noticed that I was cold. And so I just assumed that maybe this is what was causing this sensation of back and forth, because I have slept at times where I might have something strange going on, and I will incorporate all of that into the process of the dreaming. So I assume that, okay, that’s what it is. So I just took this condition into account and went back into the inner space with the intent of searching for the source – in terms of moving to the greater stillness.

The only thing I noticed is after having checked out my physical condition, and determined it to be okay, that when I then was able to let go of maybe something that was somewhat in-between yet, was that I didn’t vacillate now, as if I was being blown around a bit, in the space I was in. So I didn’t vacillate a lot.

Yet the whole situation was, as if all night long, was looking and looking because I had this as an inner agenda, so it was an earmarked approach. So there were no dreams that could happen, no imagery that could happen.

And then when I woke up, because that was where I was at, in terms of spinning, so to speak, within, I couldn’t remember anything else other than a sensation that whatever had happened was at an inner spaciality in which there was nothing that could be noticed from my attention now, even though, further back, the memory of having woken up still infected or affected things a bit, and I was still trying to learn more about the vacillating back and forth demeanor.

It’s as if I’m curious. But once I had woken up and popped my eyes open, and then went back in, I had taken into account whatever might have been some neurosis of concern. And actually then went into a point of non-consciousness, on any subtle level even, but still remembered that to the degree that, when I woke up, that’s what I still held onto. I could glance back at that, which means that I was spinning and abiding upon a mannerism that didn’t go anywhere.

Well, the significance is, obsessing exists on the inner level as well as on the outer. If I’m not pulling out a need from the empty space, I might be vacillating, which is a form of obsessing, except it can be on the inner place level. And if it’s on the inner place level, then you’re going to be still doing something in the outer, or having to think to do something in the outer. Instead, the deep teaching would occur, but I actually then went to being able to, just like in a sleep dream, to just walk off the court. And little did anybody know that when I walked off the court, and may have been dismissed as far as everyone knows, that still something exuded as a presence that held the space. And nobody notices that; it’s invisible.

So what I learned is, I learned in seeing this that in my deep within I was not my usual, absorbent, healing mode about something particular. In other words, the vacillating. I wasn’t hitting that deeper level with that vacillating.

Or, for me to say this in another way, the difference last night is I was not seeing myself having to internalize the particular capacity. Instead, it’s as if I was bored in an energetic outer. Not really, of course, because I would have liked to have played the volleyball game, for example, but, in the sleep thing, there’s a deeper realization – as if you’re bored by having to be caught up in that unmittingly. So the prima materia catalytic stimuli to absolve went to something that was stiller than the vacillation of back and forth – that’s still a type of scanning.

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65ggesWhy are we drawn to those who excel at what they do, whether as an athlete, or a business person, or as a creative person? Part of it is because of what they exude, the presence they have from having achieved what they did. We always want to be our best in their presence, and we known, deep down, that some of that “magic” can transfer to us if we are near them enough. This is the true nature of being a teacher, or an elder, to radiate our own development onto others – which makes more possible for them. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: This compares to my sleep dream, in that in the sleep dream I seem to be in a place, or shall I say an environment, in which around me, surrounding me, are some very youthful, significant people that are just naturally this way, very athletic, very gifted and unassuming in their nature about that.

In other words it’s like they just are what they are. And that is the atmosphere. And amidst that atmosphere there is me that is kind of like off to one side, kind of like the old timer in that scenario, or setting, that no one pays too much attention to. I’m harmless.

And so it’s like we’re outside of what could be a castle or a place and, suddenly, there’s this court yard that is a volleyball court yard. And there are the locals that decide to play the game. And I go, hey, this is kind of nice. I kind of like volleyball, and there it is.

And as soon as they play the first game, it’s almost like it’s time for new players, new blood, to come into the game. So from the midst of where I am present steps forward these guys they just, it’s almost like, I don’t know that they even talked amongst themselves as to whether they wanted to play the game, so I’m kind of surprised. They just move on to the court, and I find myself moving on to the court, too.

Well, I realize that we’re the dream team, meaning I might be the old geezer in the batch, and one of them says, so you want to play, too? And I just kind of nod; they’re kind of surprised because these guys are incredible. And I realize that whatever team’s on the other side just doesn’t have a chance.

And I may be the weakest one because I’m the old geezer, but I figure that around these I’ll rise to the game, perhaps. I don’t know that for sure. My days of lore are long gone. So I move into the center, and the center’s along the front line – and that’s the person who sets. And I think: perfect position for me because I can handle that easily.

And suddenly, behind me, I feel the presence of this huge, almost giant, kind of guy. So big he shadows over me. And I’m standing there, he, from behind me goes, I’m the center. And I ignore the first comment. And then, it’s almost like in a bear hug, he towers over me to such degree and almost snarls in his own little way and says: I’m the center.

And I realize, this is his undeniable mannerism. So I say, no problem, and I step off the court. But I know what’s going to happen. In other words, the dream team was in place. And he’s the only one, from what had been kind of a pickup team that had been playing there before, he’s the only one to project himself upon the scene yet.

So, when I go off, I realize that what we’re talking about is an aspect of time. And in a week, you have seven days, and you have six players on a side. So if time is measured by a week, you have six active – and I’m no longer meant, and need, to be active. I have actually paid my dues from ages ago, so that there is a flow that can come through – no matter how dormant and quiet.

In other words, they are still at a different stage of evolution where there is still a kind of activity that is needed. And I’m at a stage where everything is dormant and quiet. And so I step back from that, and, in stepping back from that, I actually carry and hold, in the quietude, that which ensues.

As the quietude, as the silence, that’s what makes what needs to happen, happen. But it can only be that way if one can truly invisible-ize themselves, if one can truly take themselves out of the equation. Not have to have some ego, because if you inject something like that, then it tears something down. It confuses what is able to take place.

There comes a point in time, when you reach a certain threshold, and you’re then meant to go through that threshold and everything is a little different. Maybe prior to that you had to play the role of being this, that, or the other, but now you’re able to effuse the role from a position of presence – out of everything that is going on in the outer as a reflective – that is all being shaped and designed from a stillness.

And you’re meant to shift into the stillness, and you’re not going to be able to be effective in your shift into the stillness, in terms of being able to absorb and handle everything that is going on, in the outer, reflectively. You’re not going to be able to do that if you still have some issue that has yet to be dealt with, or contended with, in your opinion, which means you have to truly, truly let go to be the stillness, And then, when you’re the stillness, then the stimulation that comes up from everything about and around you, that catalytic reflective comes from out of this deeper stillness.

That is why a teacher doesn’t go out and try to do things outwardly. The teacher, instead, if you were to look closely, hands out everything so that others who are still having to live something out, or are still in more of the reflective and haven’t let go of that, so they, then, can do that. And as they become more conscious and aware, they, too, realize that the true role is one of stillness yet, a greater stillness for themselves, just like what the teacher embodied and passed out.

So they, too, pass that on. Thus, that’s how something unfolds in terms of a streamlining within the tariqa of things. So there comes a point in time when you’re able to step out of that and become something, maybe not even an observer anymore, you can have that kind of stillness. Maybe an observer, to a degree, but even that dissipates and dissipates as what you hold on to as a presence is the true epicenter of everything.

Everyone observes the activity of the game that’s afoot, and no one realizes, or recognizes, or notices, that there is something behind all of that which predominates – but it predominates from the standpoint of stillness.

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i5e5It’s good to have time to prepare for a flood: grab certain things, put out some sand bags, find higher ground. But if that flood is internal, and comes from the energetics of newly opening, and awakening, inner aspects, the preparation is a bit different. We need to allow for expansion, we can’t bring certain ways with us that no longer fit, and it will take a little while to find a new state of equilibrium. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: Then I had a dream where it feels like I’m two people: I’m this adolescent boy, and then I’m this adolescent girl that are living in a home. And the boy doesn’t feel very trustworthy. Seems like sometimes I’m one, and sometimes I’m the other, and sometimes I’m an observer.

At the same time the boy doesn’t seem trustworthy, I feel like I know things he doesn’t know. So I know where things are kept, or even things from the past are stored that belong to him, that are part of his identity that he doesn’t even seem to know that he still has, or has access to. So it feels like I’m explaining to him where things are in a certain room. And they even constitute certain resources for him.

Otherwise, it’s kind of an odd situation we’re living in; there are some adults around. It’s an old building with a lot of artifacts in it, and it feels like at some point I suddenly become aware that it’s going to be flooded. And it’s like I want to bring some things to him to take with us, in case of a flood, but I realize I haven’t even really grabbed my purse or a coat, and I’m trying to get us all to another building.

And, when we leave, because of the flood that’s going to come, and I know it’ll move through the whole building we were living in, you cover things up or mix things up. I’ve grabbed a few things, but I’m not even sure what and everything’s confused. And then we’re having to stay in a large room with other people.

When we get to that large room in some ways he acts like he doesn’t know me because it feels as though it gives him a certain power if other people don’t know who he knows. He can maneuver or manipulate a little bit more that way. And I’m more of an observer in the scene, which is a little confusing to me. And I realized I did get my coat or something. Or I didn’t get a coat, maybe I had grabbed my purse, but I’d left a coat behind, and instead I grabbed a jacket that’s much too large for me – and I realize is an old school jacket of one of the people that lives in the building. And when we all have to stay in one room, whoever originally wore that jacket will probably be there.

But I’m a little confused by the boy that lived in the house like kind of acting like he doesn’t know me once we’re in the larger room because we have to kind of sometimes sleep three and four in a bed there – because everybody’s kind of refugees from the storm – but he feels like that gives him some more power and with other people not knowing that we know each other, and not knowing what’s going on. It was just an odd little dream.

John: Well, it’s a dream that, first of all, identifies a quality or characteristic of the feminine nature, of your nature, that takes and is capable of absorbing, or taking in, a quality, or pulling together an energetic so that it causes a recognition, or a realization, to come out.

First of all it recognizes and acknowledges that this is the characteristic, or quality, of relatability that is deemed important, and that then goes through kind of a neurosis of feeling like it is losing its connection to do that. And so it’s evaluating whether the confusion that causes this connection to be lost is related to a sense of thinking that there is something more.

So you’re trying to sort this out, and you’re trying to sort this out in relationship to how big the spaciality is of what is going on. And it’s as if determining the spaciality determines how and where you are able to be. Because first of all it starts with the underlying recognition that the quality of being able to take in, as a type of absorptive energy, that quality of being able to take in that energy, to embody a quality of an energy, the embodying of it is what causes a connective awareness to unfold, to emerge, and for there to be a type of balance.

And that you’re taking the position that that’s somehow or another in jeopardy. And you’re coming to this conclusion, assuming that something is askew based upon a lack of recognized sight. Now, what is the recognized sight? Recognized sight is that you sense and feel inside of yourself that the process that’s involved is going to continue to keep pulling out more and more and more, and that it is designed and destined to do that. And that, if interrupted, something like that, then, just never becomes known like it can become known, or transpire.

And so you’re kind of taking and asking a question, as well, in terms of that is your core understanding. And then, from that core understanding, you’re asking the question: is there something greater, or bigger? In other words, is the spaciality designed to be bigger?

And so in trying to consider whether the spaciality is meant to be bigger, you’re trying to sort through that. And the way you’re sorting through that it lacks a clarity. It lacks a clarity. It’s trying to find an acceptance by going through a reaction, that lacks clarity. It brings up a neurosis and kind of is left in a spaciality where something is bigger, but doesn’t know what to make out of that.

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