Archive for the ‘Inner / Outer’ Category

pur67What do we hold onto, in ourselves, when things begin to get out of hand? For many, it is the love of a family, or of an individual, for others it is a God, or a belief system. But there is a great strength within us, designed to help us navigate the unknown, and it is our human design. We are absolutely meant to find our way into the service of the whole, yet we also need to survive whatever we come across so that we are able to continue working for creation. And it is that combination, knowing that we have a greater purpose, and that we have been designed for it, that is our best path through any adversity. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In the next dream, or the dream that actually was preceding this, was this thing where every page I would look at the bugs would suddenly be all over it, you know blot it out, and I would turn the page and the bugs would just sweep into that page. And I would turn the next page and the bugs would sweep into that page.

It was a question of this accentuation of this heebie-jeebie thing that I feel, in which something is falling apart, is breaking down. It’s temporarily broken.

And then also with that there was an image of where this guy could take his head and he could stick it through a hole on the back of a chair, that was about yay big, and so to avoid some issue or to turn his attention differently, he would take and he would stick his head through this hole.

I was just amazed how he got his head through this little small hole. I was wondering if I could even put my head through that small hole; I don’t think I could, but he certainly could.

And so when you take and put all of that together, those two images in the dream, what I’m doing is I’m describing a breakdown in the outer, that I’m feeling within, and am trying to reach beyond, and I am carrying an unsettling sensation I can’t shake of an impending chaos – which is something I’m not prepared for – that will overrun everywhere I turn, while I seek to deny and not face it. Interesting huh?

That’s the condition that I seem to be encumbered with in the outer. But the meditation dream is much more interesting in that it portrays something more in terms of how something can work. It also portrays how I am that isn’t conscious enough in that process, but does portray how it can come together and work.

In this dream I see myself shooting off flare markers into a rectangular field. I have a sense of the field, it’s maybe about 80 acres or so, just to take a guess, and it’s a flat field. I don’t get the memo, but it is said that when you shoot these flare markers you can’t go over a certain line. You stay within the center of this field; you can’t go over a particular line. And from there you can shoot these markers out to the edges of the field.

In other words, this is how you’re able to denote your circumference of your overall beingness of this place is you shoot these flares out. Well, I heard that you’re supposed to stay and not go beyond a certain line, but here I am with my flare gun – and you only have so many markers in order to denote this for purposes of being able to come back to it, for recollection purposes, or something – because in the depth of where I’m at in this dream state I can see everything plainly and clearly, but that isn’t the point.

The point is to be able to come back to these markers, but I don’t necessarily recognize the importance. And so I don’t stay where the line’s at, and I walk around the peripheral of it, and shoot the flares off and, of course, that leads to a disaster because these marker flares I eventually run out of before I’ve made it all the way around the field. If I would’ve stayed more in the center and shot from the inner and shot out towards the outer, it would’ve been different.

Now fortunately there was a woman that followed the prime directive of realizing that you had to have things marked, or the ability to look at everything in the circumference of things. So she stayed where the line was at and shot these flares out to denote markers for purposes of recollection or remembrance.

I have to seal that image of this area so that when I come back and this is no longer crystal clear, you know, because it might be clear in what I’m dreaming, but it’s not going to be crystal clear when I come back to this place. That from the flares that I can find and such, and from having documented at a depth inside of myself this gap where no flares are at, between the two points I can impute the other if I can just hold onto a deep, deep, recollection that this was something that I can’t lean on the remembrance to anymore. I have to have a direct knowingness that is held with inside of myself.

In other words, I don’t have the tools. The idea of being able to come back to the markers is almost an idea that still incorporates somewhat of a sense of the senses, where you can leave notes to yourself, so to speak. But a deeper depth, which this dream is portraying, is that to really get it you have to somehow or another have access to the knowingness from having freeze framed it, so to speak, at an inner, inner depth.

So what occurred last night was that was the depth, that was the deeper depth, in terms of the meditation. But in terms of the way that that is approached, the way that is being approached, the way that is unfolding, that’s a whole other thing.

That approach has to not get torn asunder, or impacted, by things that are going on that are going to be hard to contend with. There’s like bugs everywhere, denial and everything, because certainly it just can’t be, you know, and yet it will be.

And yet, at the same time, in spite of all of that going on, the table place setting is that of the meditation dream in which one has to not lose those deep, deep inflections that are freeze-framed in your nature. Don’t shock yourself out of those. There’s a need to hold onto them, not let the outer create the amnesia that then spills – as the amnesia of the outer dictates – spills into a letting go of the freeze frame vibrational qualities that are just imbedded naturally, and function within a depth of one’s self, in spite of the outer conditions of things. Isn’t that interesting how it all pulls together?

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crowded-marketIt’s probably easier for most of us to recall those rare moments when we feel settled, and at one with ourselves, and in the flow of life. Mostly the world knocks us this way and that, and we are constantly struggling to regain our equilibrium. And this is why it is so difficult to live a life without a greater purpose: if we have no greater purpose, one entertainment is as good as the next, and there’s no reason to choose differently. But our purpose, our human purpose, allows us to see clearly what is useless in terms of that journey, and we can choose accordingly. There will always be detours – that’s how we grow – but we need to keep them to a minimum. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: All I really remember of my dreams last night, is it felt like I kept having the same dream in that it was outdoors in kind of hilly country. It was usually sunny. And it was like I and some other people were pursuing someone. We were trying to catch them and bring them back for something they had done. But it felt like it just kept repeating, but I never could quite get a hold of it.

John: Well, there’s a whole sensation of trying to catch up with something, from a depth within, that is kind of the running schematic. And it’s kind of a prime directive, too, in that deep down we’re kind of compelled to having to realize a greater part of ourselves.

And that realizing a greater part of ourselves, a part that takes us outside of our time and space limitations that is kept in place by the trance of senses and mind, to catch up with that greater part of ourselves is to go to the all-pervasive soul in our nature.

Well, it’s pretty hard to do because everything around us is causing our attention to go this way and that way, and yet there is that echo. And so what you’re doing is you’re reverbing, and reverbing, and reverbing as if trying to come to the grips of this echo that you feel affecting you. That’s very similar to my second dream, which also has a quality of floundering about.

In this dream, I’m inside. I’ve traveled to and am inside a multistory building that’s huge, and there’s several floor levels. I don’t know how many, but each floor I know is huge, and that it’s a maze just to go in any given floor. And it’s kind of a glorified hospital, although there seems to be other things going on like businesses, and merchants, in this place, too.

But each floor has a central nursing station, that’s how one knows it’s kind of a glorified hospital. And there’s just people everywhere that can grab your attention, and cause you to be distracted, or to get confused and get lost.

So I have come into this building, I’m up on the second floor, I seem to know that there’s a person I need to find that’s on the second floor. And I’ve come with a friend, but we get separated on the second floor. And in my moving about on the second floor, trying to find the person who I come here to visit, I also set down a bag that I was carrying.

Fortunately, I can recollect where I set that bag down because I left it at the nursing station on the second floor. And even though somehow deep, deep down I have a sense that the person I’m looking for is on the second floor, and that my friend is somewhere wandering around on the second floor, too, I end up going to the third floor.

And when I go to the third floor it’s like I’m even more spaced out, and I get really enamored at looking at all of the myriad of things going on on the third floor. And at some point I even leave my notebook behind, my dream notebook, which is important to me, that I apparently was carrying, too. And it’s almost like I’m so amnesic that I have no idea where I might have left it, except it was somewhere on this floor.

And it all kind of starts to gel, my predicament, when in my wandering about I come to the nursing station on the third floor. It’s then that I realize, oh my goodness, I need to get out of this enamored condition that I’m in, and I also need to find my notebook, and I need to get back to where I need to be looking, retrieve my bag and such, which I can leave this bag behind, but who am I to know what there is to let go of?

It would be nice to have this bag, just like my notebook, caused some other kind of unfoldment depth to my nature. So, I know I should take steps that go between nursing stations, but instead I wander off as if something will pop in, or something will help me, or I’ll accidentally get an inkling as to where I set my notebook down. When, all of a sudden, actually by complete, total surprise fate would have it that I see the notebook – and it’s laying on the floor.

So I go over to pick up the notebook and, as I pick it up, this guy grabs at it and he says, “This is mine.” And he claims he knows it’s his because it’s got the three-ring spiral binding or whatever it was that he portrayed. I look at the notebook, and the notebook has all that scratching out and scribbling that I do and, on this particular page where it’s open, there’s more scribbling and complete blanking out than there is anything written.

And so I look down and I can read my writing, so I know it’s my notebook. So to free myself again of how I need to proceed, he’s got the notebook, I’ve got the notebook, and so I need to go. I can’t be just sitting there tugging away, so I bend over and I bite him on the wrist to get him to let go.

So now with my notebook in hand I now know that I go back to the nursing station on the second floor, probably ask at the nursing station rather than just continuing to keep wandering around, probably will find the person I’m looking for there on the second floor, probably somewhere in that vicinity or area on the second floor I’ll also probably run into my friend. And there at the nursing station, where I conveniently laid my bag down, I can retrieve that, too. That’s when I wake up.

So this is the same dream that you had, so to speak, in that there was this reverbing around to try to zoom in on something or another that is meant to be, that is trying to come out, that’s trying to make itself known. You don’t even have a very good guess of what that is, but you’re haunted by it nevertheless. That’s kind of how your dream is.

And in my dream, my inclination is to keep going up where it gets foggier, and less clear, and less clear, and I keep losing more and more of myself. But what I’m losing is important, too, and what I need is more grounded – on the second floor. There’s no first floor in this building. It’s like a second floor only, which is another image in which something isn’t quite grounded as it needs to be.

But, in terms of the meaning of this dream, I wrote: I’m feeling a chaos inside over a waywardness that I feel in the outer. And to know what I need to know, in terms of my whereabouts, parts of self, what I am to do, what I need to see, who I need to be, etc., I need to set aside, let go of a waywardness vibration that is unsettling to a heart that is able to put things out. In other words, to extricate itself from its delirium; when basically I stop.

And it’s not a matter of being encumbered or unencumbered, although that’s one way of trying to look at it. I just need to settle back because something is coming into vision. There is a knowing, but I’m not going to catch up with it if I’m in an unsettled state.

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9afaOur dreams are wonderful with metaphors. Here a crow – smart, mischievous, but also frivolous – threatens a rooster – stable, with a responsibility to his hens. And in this exchange we can see exactly the threat of the external world, the bread and circuses, that constantly seek to entertain us and pull us away from our true responsibility, which is to fulfill our purpose and design – on behalf of that which created us. It is a struggle that has always been waged; unfortunately, the crow is almost always victorious. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So then, in the last dream, I experience an overall vibratoriness that is being pulled into manifestation. I feel this vibratoriness being drawn from me into a more dense outer need. This image then shifts, and I am seeing this in nature.

To begin with I see a more dexterous crow able to move about in an unrestricted way, in terms of hopping about this way and that way, that looks kind of free in terms of its taking of things in the outer.

The crow flies into an area where there are chickens. The hens accommodate or don’t oppose or do anything to affect the way the crow just goes and takes what the crow takes, but the rooster carries an energetic overall vibratoriness as a responsibility, in terms of the well-being of the hens, and that conflicts with the crow just hopping about taking what it wants to take.

And so you and I are standing behind a window, and we’re watching this crow who has pounced, or extended a wing, because he’s got more dexterity; he can fly. He’s come down and he’s thrown a wing over the top of the back of rooster, and is in a position to strike the rooster in the back of the neck. He hasn’t done it yet, and at the moment there is still a type of stillness. And I’m kind of frozen there: do I go and I rescue the rooster, or what? So instead, I’m like sitting in a trance: is he going to hurt the rooster? So far that hasn’t yet happened, but, if it does, the rooster will bleed.

So what is going on is this is an image in which a dense reflectiveness drains the aliveness of life. In other words, when you just identify with that, or when you just hold that, like the crow is the denseness in life that goes about just grabbing this and taking that.

And the rooster is the development of something in which it’s trying to hold a vibratoriness in a particular way, but maybe he doesn’t quite have the dexterity of the multiplicity of things. The crow has more mobility. A rooster can’t fly, and so the crow is able to get an advantage on the rooster.

And this is what happens when the outer, which is the crow and all of its bouncing around ways of taking things, is given a precedence over the inner vibratory essence. A draining process occurs when this happens, and this hurts the Will of God, which is now equated to being: it hurts the heart. Because you could see something very despairing in this poor rooster who has to do something and he can’t, and he’s helpless. He can’t stand up to the crow, and the crow’s up to no good all the time.

So, to begin with, it seems harmless, but the loss of spirit is a leeching and taking, and what that does, of course, is that takes you and separates you away from the inner essence of what is important – and rapes the spiritual world of its underlying essence. It’s a vibratory essence and the rooster embodied that as best he could, and now it’s for naught.

In that image, if the crow were to strike, the crow could kill the rooster, and the rooster has his head kind of down a bit. There’s not much he can really do. And that’s not how it’s supposed to work. It’s not supposed to work in terms of the outer taking advantage of the inner, of the vibratoriness.

The vibratoriness accommodates the denser, just like the rooster can accommodate what is needed for the hen. The hens can be kind of denser. The rooster has to maintain the vibratory energy of the protective space and whatnot, and the hens can just kind of be in life in a denser way even, if you wanted to call it a denser way, but the combination of that pulls something together.

But the seed thought of this thing is that the shadow… you don’t let the shadow run around behind you, and then you lunge out because then the shadow kind of drains you from behind by the fact that you’re ignoring it. You instead follow the shadow, and that’s how you become more conscious in terms of taking on what you need to assimilate.

See, the outer to inner approach is the wrong direction. In such an approach the Will of the inner is not honoring the Will of God. In such an approach, what is going on in the outer, or what is going on in the environment, is something that has its own freedom of choice or something. In other words, it’s not honoring the Will of something that’s the true essence that vibrates through everything, which is the Will of God.

The Will of Man thinks he can get away with this or that as a kind of freedom of choice prerogative. It is when the Will of God awakens from within that the orientation changes. When the Will of God is capable of coming into the Will of Man a natural communion occurs.

Similarly speaking, the shadow does not follow our perception of the higher self. The awakening occurs oppositely. The awakening occurs when the higher self follows the shadow to complete itself. The image of the crow submitting the rooster is a seed thought image. This is an unnatural effect portraying a wrong result or approach.

The spirit energy of the rooster who is adhering to an energetic vibratoriness in life that flows through him, as best as he’s able to catch up with it, is getting plundered, or there is a plundering of the heart energy, or inner aliveness, causing him to have to submit.

In other words, the crow is plundering the heart of the world, so to speak, by its activities of taking, which is errant behavior, which a crow is at home with in the outer world, and therefore predominates his mannerism that way. And such mannerism, when it predominates that way, results in a further veiling of genuine vibratory aliveness.

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