As far as our dreams are concerned, life can seem like a party: the mingling of people, the noise, the busyness of the world we find ourselves in. And, of course, what is being handed-out to us at this party? What do we have to settle for, even though we know that what they’re giving us is no good for us? This contradiction in us, of wanting to be in life, yet unable to connect to something real at the party we find ourselves at, is one of the greatest causes of stress in the world. That’s why a strategy of higher connections can help alleviate the feeling that this is a nightmare we need to awaken from. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
Jeane: I feel like I had a nightmare that was disturbing to me. If I recall correctly, it kind of starts out that I’m at something like a party. There’s people there that I know from high school, and one of the focuses of the party is that when they get ready to feed people there’s going to be meat available. But the meat so far is just being carried around in these… oh, it’s almost like these plastic trays that you see at the supermarket, except they don’t even have Saran Wrap on the top of them to hold the meat in.
And different people have some packets of meat that they’ll be passing out later. I’m looking at this arrangement and it disturbs me because it doesn’t seem like the right way to handle meat or, you know, get it distributed or, you know, just to carry it around raw and in packets that aren’t really wrapped correctly, or aren’t wrapped period.
Then I leave the party, and I’m in my car, and when I go down the road I suddenly stop outside this building that’s almost abandoned – but there’s one or two people sitting around it – and I have a feeling that it’s a place where something violent happened in the past, like it’s haunted.
Then I notice that my car windows are all covered with mud, and I can’t see out, and I’m in the backseat, not the front seat. So the first thing I do is I crawl up to the front seat, and I can kind of feel like people that I feel are menacing approaching the car. I can’t see anything, though, so I just step on the gas – even though I can’t see where I’m going yet. And then that seems to knock the mud off the windows.
And then I turn around and I head back into town and, when I get into town, I go back into the building where I had been before. And now it feels like people are getting ready to hand out some of these packets of meat, but because it’s not wrapped, the meat just even falls out, or falls on the floor.
And I’m still kind of appalled that this is the way they’re going to distribute things, and it felt like a nightmare to me.
John: Well, in the dream, you’re trying to be in life, and do it in such a way so that you’re not affected by the conditions in the outer. And, in terms of trying to figure out how to deal with everything that there is, in terms of the myriad of things going around, in your particular case you’re in life, which means you’re at the party, and that at the party the food that is served, that which you have to contend with and you have to work through, that is an aspect of consciousness, in other words, how do you contend with the beingness without getting the myriad of things, without getting distracted, or distorted?
And you carry a certain sensibility of how it can, and should, be from something that’s percolating at a depth of your nature, at I guess one would say, a stillness of your nature, or I guess you would even call it a greater stillness of your nature, might be a better way of saying it, because the way you see it done in the outer, the way that you’re having to contend with it in the outer, the possibilities in terms of taking it in, that are available to you, none of them are acceptable in terms of some deep inner sensibility that you haven’t put your finger on, that you have.
In other words, the meat can be served in some overall container, but it’s still raw. In other words, it still has its effect. In other words, it’s not cooked, or it’s served in packets in which it’s all over the place, and irregular, in that regard.
So in an attempt to sort this out you try to leave the place to try to find the letting go and, in leaving the place, it’s almost as if you are carrying some mood, or mannerism, with you, in terms of leaving the place, because when you get in the car and try to go somewhere, you’re holding back in some capacity because you’re not in the front, and you can’t see. You still can’t see, because the mood, or whatever it is, still has its hold on you.
So you attempt to let go by throwing all caution to the wind, so to speak. It’s not a proper letting go, however. It’s like you just do an exasperation pedal-to-the-metal kind of thing, that may seem to throw something off your shoulders, may seem to have the pretension of alleviating your condition.
However, you haven’t really done this consciously. You’re not really able to be in the nothingness and the beingness simultaneously, that is assuming that you hit the nothingness in some fashion, or deceived yourself, because when you come back you’re just as reprehensibly disturbed by the way things are in the beingness as you were before.
So your dream is playing with the theme of beingness and nothingness. In your dream it’s like you do have the sense of something that has to be different, or has to be more. It’s just that there’s no evidence that you’re able to bring the two together. And thus it’s like a nightmare.
And there’s no evidence that you’re actually able to access the nothingness, even though you try because it’s as if there was something you were still carrying when you left the party and got in the car – that you never dropped – because when you came back you were right back into the same condition. You hadn’t expanded your auric space so that this, too, fell away. Instead, what was going on, the beingness of things that was going on, was still creating a defining indulgent weight upon you, or burden.
To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: Being and Nothing