Not Taking the Bait

Jeane: In my dream it feels like I’ve had someone imprisoned in a hospital for something they did. I’m pretty sure it’s a woman, but sometimes I seem to think about them as a man, so I’m not positive on that part.

Some time has passed, and now another man and I are going to the hospital; we’re going to smuggle this person out and break them free. This will probably be as much a surprise to the person in the hospital as it would be if the hospital staff discovered that we’re the ones doing it.

So we have to distract the staff and smuggle the person out. I get them in my car and then I have to decide whether to have them hide, or maybe cut their hair short, so if it’s a woman she can now be disguised as a man until we can get past any roadblocks.

I’m trying to go through different scenarios of how best to keep hidden. Then we drive off.

I have the impression that one of the reasons I can break this person free now is that my children have all grown up. So it feels safe to let this person out or to break them out. There’s also some kind of intense dialogue I seem to have with them now.

John: The theme of the dreaming last night has to do with having to hold onto some sort of overall inner balance, in relationship to being confronted with things that are overwhelming, in terms of the use of energy, in the outer.

What you did was start with a general, overall vibration in terms of how you felt things. Then you took and added to that. There’s a certain overallness to an energy from within, which you hold inside. You’re in a physical body and you’re able to direct that energy in particular ways, and when you do direct it in some specific way you can, when coming from the center, have a lot of energy . And you can do it in a free way – providing you hold onto the understanding that it comes from.

The energy you’re working with is an energy that’s at the essence of your being, or is from the inner, so when you’re having this dream, in terms of you taking and now applying this energy in some specific outer way, what you’re doing is weighing the degree to which this foray takes something away from how you feel yourself connected in an overall context.

And you find you’re able to do that because something about you has grown up (the children), or has gotten to the point where you can sustain the energy that you feel within, without losing it. Ordinarily when you take energy and cycle it and funnel it into some outer capacity, it faces a lot of resistance from you, in the form of personal or psychological indulgences. So the degree to which you personally indulge, is the degree to which you do harm to yourself in terms of maintaining this inner space.

You have this dream in which you’re trying to see if you truly are free, if you truly have let go. In other words, can you deal with a huge challenge, from an outer context point-of-view, that you’ve decided to take on, to see if you can effect a change in it or break something free?

And, can you do this without contaminating yourself, or without contaminating the inner space? A part of you is saying yes you can, because something has grown up. However, you’re not sure, so what’s facing you is presented as a dream, with the potential to be caught, or not break free.

So what you’re doing when you have a dream like this is you’re weighing the forces inside you that are personal versus impersonal, or that are totally free or in a nothingness or an emptiness, versus still having some sort of involvement in an outer capacity, reflective way.

In doing this you’re recognizing the degree to which that kind of lack of independence, in terms of letting go, will actually distort or hurt you.

An example of what that’s like is when the American Idol judge Steven Tyler commented to one of the participants that her biggest challenge was in accepting herself. He felt that this comes with time and that eventually she would get to the point where she could just think, “I don’t give a shit.”

Using that language, and many other mannerisms, is Steven Tyler’s way of showing that he’s beyond what other people think; he’s not limited by what other people project on him, or how they try to define him. So he stays true to his core. He said to the participant that she may not have that quality and freedom now, but she’ll get that. Eventually it will come to her.

That’s kind of how this dream is. You have this huge energetic opening up – can you process it in a way that doesn’t compromise it, or inject some limiting personal, self-image problem, in relation to what you’re experiencing inside and what you’re dealing with on the outside?

The dream is a testing ground, presenting a situation to see if you can take and truly bring inner into outer. Because if you just take the bait of whatever life throws at you, feeling that you have to confront it and deal with it in some separate capacity, then you really haven’t found, using the words of Steven Tyler, the spiritual version of that “I-don’t-give-a-shit” mannerism inside you. That place that’s totally free, empty, and in a nothingness.

The Enemy of the Lower Self

John: In my dream, I’m dealing with the specifics (a masculine view) of what it’s like to work with a person who doesn’t have a grasp of what it means to be awakened to life, from within.

Everyone struggles to make things make sense, even if it’s a lie they’re telling themselves. Everyone tries to fit life into certain parameters, and we do this because we generally don’t know any better. We don’t have any experience of something being awakened inside, which would enable a deeper view.

If someone comes along and tells a person about something that’s beyond their experience, about how there’s something real at some deeper level, unless they’re open and can make that leap in understanding, it can be dangerous because it threatens them and challenges their belief system – putting them in a position to defend it.

If a person is open, this new information can begin to bring down the veils and barriers upon which they have conducted and organized their life. But if they’re not open, and what’s said runs counter to what they have set up for themselves, they’ll feel threatened. Then they have to defend their worldview or else they’ll have a breakdown.

This is where people get righteous in their beliefs and adopt defense mechanisms to support their concepts. This can make them dangerous. This is why so much of spiritual truth remains hidden, and is only found by, and able to touch, those who want to be awakened. What is in us has to awaken very, very gradually, otherwise it will cause the opposite of opening up, i.e., shutting down.

In that reactivity we get all the dire things that happen in the outer, which we witness in the breaking down of the world. It’s a reaction against anything that defies the norm of a person’s, or a society’s, concepts. Through history witches were burned at the stake and heretics of one form or another were killed to protect the “norm.” Even the crucifixion of Jesus Christ was an act meant to prevent the spreading of ideas that upset the status quo.

In your dream, you started out in a dark, desolate place, where you didn’t have any inkling that there was more to life than driving around in circles (for this reference, see The Unawakened). Then, suddenly, something more awakened (the baby) and that “something more” caused you to become more conscious of choosing to take on a responsibility within the greater order of things and the greater balance of things.

And you do that by relating from, and working from, that space within that has awakened. It’s a step away from seeing the outer world as being all that exists. You no longer have to defend the outer context as real because you know better.

So, through that image, we can see how an aliveness can work from within and take us from what had been something dark and dense into a type of quickening.

In my dream, I’m looking at the particulars of what it’s like if someone gets exposed to an awareness when they don’t have the parameters to understand it. In other words, there isn’t the experience awakened, or opened up, in them. Why that causes such danger in life is because that consciousness, that awareness, when it’s recognized for what it is, is seen as the enemy of the lower self.

The lower self, then, isn’t able to have the experience of the higher self, so it has to fight back. It has to do everything in its power to prevent this higher aspect from coming through because it appears to it as some “demon possession” or some other alien force.

In the dream I find that I’ve returned from a trek, and I’m now in a city in which everyone in the city knows who I am. I’m accepted. I’ve been on a journey and they know that it’s about something meaningful, and they accept that, even though that’s as far as they’re capable of understanding it.

But, in this city is a police officer who doesn’t understand any of it; he hasn’t learned how to appreciate whatever it is that I’ve done. Just my being there interferes with his perception of how things need to exist, so because he’s trying to protect his conceptualizations, he’s looking for anything he can find to have me arrested: if I can be taken out of the equation then his view of life can be asserted.

First he harasses me in the street, hoping I’ll do something to give him cause to arrest me. When that doesn’t work he makes up a new law with which he can justify arresting me. One of the ideas he has is a vagrancy charge.

Now, wherever I go in the city I have to have a reason to be there. If I don’t, then I’m doing something wrong. This is a rule he cooks up in his head, which gives him cause to stop me.

So I’m in the city, sitting at a table, and he can’t touch me because everyone there vouches for who I am. He has to bide his time, waiting for a reason.

I decide to walk around the city, so he makes up a rule that if I step into an area where I’m not invited, I’m violating the law. I stroll up a street that has a dead end. Even though I’m not doing anything to create a disturbance, he thinks this is enough to harass me.

When he comes up to try to arrest me, I see a table over to one side where there’s a seat open, so I walk over and ask if I can sit down. If they say no, the officer could impose his rule about vagrancy or something and I could be locked up. But the people there say yes, which means I haven’t strayed or done anything out of the ordinary. I sit down.

That leaves the officer a little confused because he thought he had me. Then another person come and sits down at the table, and the officer tries to get this new person to say I don’t belong there. He’s desperately trying to impose his authority against me so he can get rid of something that doesn’t make sense to him. He feels righteous in terms of what he’s trying to do.

This is an important subject, so we will continue this discussion in our next post.

A Sequence of Events

John: As this series of images begins, I’m with a person who recently visited us. He takes a picture of a large luxury car that has caught his attention. Then he comes across a small car, which I consider insignificant because it’s got a rack on it and all kinds of stuff that hide what it is. To my surprise he takes a picture of this car as well.

Then he uses a software program to remove all the attachments that hide the beauty of the little car. The image is now opened up and the car can be seen. He then creates a collage of the two cars side by side, as if he found them that way. I’m amazed that this can be done. The big car and the little car can be seen in a whole different light now; they don’t look too bad together.

The understanding here is that I’m both the big car and the little car, and both aspects are important. As things currently exist, the little car (my life) seems insignificant because of the outer clutter, yet when that’s taken away, it becomes interesting. And when it’s placed next to the big car, it creates an amazing image of how these two different aspects complement each other.

In considering this image with the prior dreams (see Up to Speed), I realize that different parts of me need to be “cooked” at different speeds, i.e., given time to evolve in their own way, and I need to give space for that. I can do that by limiting my reactions – my self-conscious, emotional barriers – which keep me from blossoming. That will enable me to exist side by side with my higher self (big car) as the levels come together.

Some people are predicting that, in the future, working with nano technology in a unique way, it’s going to be possible to create and produce the items we need by way of manipulating matter and manufacturing something instantly. This is obviously something on a cutting edge of development.

In the same context, my dream uses a recent house guest who takes pictures of seemingly silly (to us) things. Is it possible that deep down there’s something else moving behind the scenes, of which he’s hardly cognizant, that enables him to be able to blend things together to see them in a new light? Is it an essence in his nature at play?

In the next dream there’s a 2’ x 4’ floor mat in front of a refrigerator. The short side is against the refrigerator. Some water splashes the area and the mat catches most of it, but some lands on the floor. I turn the mat lengthwise so it can be even more effective. I would have done it sooner if I had observed the need.  

The meaning of this has to do with noting how my unfolding is enabling me to better see and adapt to what’s needed.

This dream is kind of funny. It starts with a small man coming up behind me and trying to hold my arm behind my back. Deep down I know I can easily wrestle free and confront him directly and, in so doing, bring this situation to a state of proper perspective, i.e., we can both come to know more.  

This is showing me that, by overcoming resistances in life I can develop an inner power that can lead to a greater awareness of my self, and of the whole.

In the next dream, I learn from a man that his wife likes the look of my bedspread. He’s trying to tell me that when she gets something in her head, she won’t let it go. In other words, where can she get this bedspread? I try to tell him that the bedspread is no longer made. Nevertheless I look for somewhere she can find something similar.

The meaning of this is, in order to reach the hidden mysteries of life, I must notice the signs on the horizon. The perspective is that of a person (in outer life) seeking something and wanting to know more about what exists on a deeper, inner level. Getting the bedspread is their way of catching up with it.

In other words, the bedspread is indicative of something else that’s waking up and compelling them to try and reach a particular note – by association. As a parallel, you could say that I too need to see things with the curiosity that was shown by my house guest (in the first image), rather than making my own projection of its worth or value.

That will allow me to see another side of what’s trying to emerge, by noting this unfolding of inner consciousness. The guest was entwined with life, but encumbered and hiding a deep awareness that’s mostly unconscious. I need to observe his outer mannerisms and, if I’m truly responsible, I can catch up with other veils (in me) that I’m not readily seeing.

In the last image, a person is looking for something as it is meant to be. They seek a pristine quality, or a type of perfection in it. The question becomes, are they willing to accept something in a lesser state?  

As I sit with this complexity, I find myself having to take a different position. In other words, I can’t begrudgingly accept the lesser. I wake up understanding that my nature will not let me settle for something that’s lesser than what I know is possible.

In this, I’m contrasting two inner energetic states, one is the state that will compromise even though there’s so much more. I have to sense what that’s like, and also what it’s like to aspire to the greater picture. Aspiring for more requires a different level of concentration or aliveness.

When I consider all the dreams last night and their sequence, first I have to see the barrier, second I have to see the way I’m moving around in life and what this implies in terms of what’s awakening or trying to come to the surface.

Third I must be gentle with myself because inner aspects are evolving at different rates. Fourth I can’t let little barriers mislead me. Fifth, I need to note the inner conviction in my nature that’s trying to wake up. And sixth, I need to get out of my own way so that what is there at this deeper level can find its own pathway to the surface.