Posts Tagged ‘chaos in a dream’

xsfYesterday, in A Deeper Part, we saw a turf war between elements of the inner life. And some battles are not easily won: what is entrenched in us, and what is satisfied by our inner status quo, can put up tremendous resistance to the new: to the baby or child figure in a dream. Here the battle rages on, and the figure of a minister (spirituality) is running away to the new life (wife and baby). Yet because this type of outplay happens within us, our system seeks always to reconcile the different sides. In this case, that leads to a scene of chaos and plague! (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: In the next dream, it feels like at first I’m kind of observing, there’s this small town, and there’s a minister in the town who has left the wife, or woman, he was with originally. I have the impression he left her for this other woman, because the other woman has had a baby. And it’s a really sweet baby.

And so he and this woman that he’s with now, and the baby, it feels like they’re going to travel somewhere, maybe just even visiting somewhere for a day, and they’ve gotten a train. And I’ve noticed this, and then I seem to go back to the church that he came from, because it’s like I just kind want to observe the scene, like I’m kind of feeling the energy of the baby and her, maybe some people at the church, and how do they feel about all this?

And so, after observing this, and observing the congregation, and looking at the church a little, it’s like I have the sense I want to go back and get on the train, and find him and the woman and the baby. But when I get on the train, the train suddenly has several cars now of people, and it’s very chaotic.

The first car I walk through is like chaotic, and the second car it feels like people are spread out on the floor, and there’s blood, like maybe everybody died of some virus, or plague, on that one. And then I have a little more urgency to start walking through the third car to find them, because I can’t seem to find them. And I think that’s when I wake up.

John: That’s an image in which there was a certain established mannerism connection that existed, in terms of an overall, in terms of a certain overall, and that mannerism has been skewered by another variable that took what was set and caused it to go out grasping for things, trying to establish a whole new way. And what ended up happening was that it got put into a dire, very diseased, distressed condition, and that, try as you might, you couldn’t do anything in terms of finding this in its distressed and dire condition.

So you can’t find something in its distressed and dire condition. So the whole thing starts off with something that has a quality about it that isn’t able to handle the quality that it has. In other words, it’s a gifted kid, he’s been brought in the situation, you’ve had something to do with bringing this to be, just like the minister is gifted in his way to be able to relate to a congregation, in that he has a certain quality about him that’s established. Then the gifted kid acts up, goes catatonic, and is about to destroy everything in his environment.

And then the minister goes off into something else that looks better in the other side of things, and finds himself on a train, or appears to be going on a train, appears to be going away, and you are looking to try to figure out if there’s a way of bringing him back, to pull the two together. But you’re not able to find him because everything on this train is in a state of disorder, and diseased stress.

It’s like the first dream and the third dream are correlated, from the standpoint in that there is a gap in there. In other words, the gap that exists is the cohesion that had been between the minister and his congregation, and between this genius and his school.

That in-betweenness is interesting, in terms of something that needs to be found in that way of awakening, in that there is something about you, there is this aspect about you. In other words, more so than however it is that you’ve been, there is this aspect about you that needs to come to know itself, and that sits in between.

Both your first dream, and your third dream, none of that is happening. That second dream offers, or suggests, an awakening because it’s in the second dream that, as a consequence of whatever it is that’s been happening in life, you come to realize that you are not necessarily what you seem, in that you have a whole aspected quality nature inside of yourself that you don’t know anything about, and that you need to catch up with, that you need to find, and that that is apt to change the way you could be.

Because this dream seems to be an answer to the first and second dream, because either that or you reverb back and don’t get the memo, because the first dream there is something in the setup that has huge possibilities, and then there’s the derangement that happens. And, what went haywire? Well something in the middle got missed, and that’s the indigenous, or the in-the-blood quality of something. It somehow went bye-bye, got forgotten, got lost. Something especially strange vibrationally shorted all that out.

And in the second dream it was also like a type of shorting out, in that, at first, you had something there that was acceptable. In other words, a minister and his congregation, and a setness, maybe, with his wife, that then all of a sudden needed a different pizzazz. That got shorted out, so to speak, the steady-as-she-goes got shorted out, and now this whole thing is thrown into a whole other way of being, totally askewed way of being. And, in this askewed way of being, the minister and whatever he’s going off doing has jumped the train, has got people dying of the plague, and chaos everywhere, and nowhere to be found.

This is not painting a very good predictive picture of things, in relationship to the scenario, but what it is pointing out, which was something I was pondering, too, what it is pointing out is it’s pointing out something in the middle of all of this. The little process. In other words, the shorting out word, where what is behind the shorting out, or not shorting out? And it has to do with catching up with something of a greater knowingness about one’s self, that’s in the blood, or in one’s nature, that hasn’t come to the fruition it needs to come to.

That’s interesting. So it’s almost as if the whole chemistry of the stuff is a haywire-ism, but within that haywire-ism is something more that could come to fruition.

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pur67What do we hold onto, in ourselves, when things begin to get out of hand? For many, it is the love of a family, or of an individual, for others it is a God, or a belief system. But there is a great strength within us, designed to help us navigate the unknown, and it is our human design. We are absolutely meant to find our way into the service of the whole, yet we also need to survive whatever we come across so that we are able to continue working for creation. And it is that combination, knowing that we have a greater purpose, and that we have been designed for it, that is our best path through any adversity. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In the next dream, or the dream that actually was preceding this, was this thing where every page I would look at the bugs would suddenly be all over it, you know blot it out, and I would turn the page and the bugs would just sweep into that page. And I would turn the next page and the bugs would sweep into that page.

It was a question of this accentuation of this heebie-jeebie thing that I feel, in which something is falling apart, is breaking down. It’s temporarily broken.

And then also with that there was an image of where this guy could take his head and he could stick it through a hole on the back of a chair, that was about yay big, and so to avoid some issue or to turn his attention differently, he would take and he would stick his head through this hole.

I was just amazed how he got his head through this little small hole. I was wondering if I could even put my head through that small hole; I don’t think I could, but he certainly could.

And so when you take and put all of that together, those two images in the dream, what I’m doing is I’m describing a breakdown in the outer, that I’m feeling within, and am trying to reach beyond, and I am carrying an unsettling sensation I can’t shake of an impending chaos – which is something I’m not prepared for – that will overrun everywhere I turn, while I seek to deny and not face it. Interesting huh?

That’s the condition that I seem to be encumbered with in the outer. But the meditation dream is much more interesting in that it portrays something more in terms of how something can work. It also portrays how I am that isn’t conscious enough in that process, but does portray how it can come together and work.

In this dream I see myself shooting off flare markers into a rectangular field. I have a sense of the field, it’s maybe about 80 acres or so, just to take a guess, and it’s a flat field. I don’t get the memo, but it is said that when you shoot these flare markers you can’t go over a certain line. You stay within the center of this field; you can’t go over a particular line. And from there you can shoot these markers out to the edges of the field.

In other words, this is how you’re able to denote your circumference of your overall beingness of this place is you shoot these flares out. Well, I heard that you’re supposed to stay and not go beyond a certain line, but here I am with my flare gun – and you only have so many markers in order to denote this for purposes of being able to come back to it, for recollection purposes, or something – because in the depth of where I’m at in this dream state I can see everything plainly and clearly, but that isn’t the point.

The point is to be able to come back to these markers, but I don’t necessarily recognize the importance. And so I don’t stay where the line’s at, and I walk around the peripheral of it, and shoot the flares off and, of course, that leads to a disaster because these marker flares I eventually run out of before I’ve made it all the way around the field. If I would’ve stayed more in the center and shot from the inner and shot out towards the outer, it would’ve been different.

Now fortunately there was a woman that followed the prime directive of realizing that you had to have things marked, or the ability to look at everything in the circumference of things. So she stayed where the line was at and shot these flares out to denote markers for purposes of recollection or remembrance.

I have to seal that image of this area so that when I come back and this is no longer crystal clear, you know, because it might be clear in what I’m dreaming, but it’s not going to be crystal clear when I come back to this place. That from the flares that I can find and such, and from having documented at a depth inside of myself this gap where no flares are at, between the two points I can impute the other if I can just hold onto a deep, deep, recollection that this was something that I can’t lean on the remembrance to anymore. I have to have a direct knowingness that is held with inside of myself.

In other words, I don’t have the tools. The idea of being able to come back to the markers is almost an idea that still incorporates somewhat of a sense of the senses, where you can leave notes to yourself, so to speak. But a deeper depth, which this dream is portraying, is that to really get it you have to somehow or another have access to the knowingness from having freeze framed it, so to speak, at an inner, inner depth.

So what occurred last night was that was the depth, that was the deeper depth, in terms of the meditation. But in terms of the way that that is approached, the way that is being approached, the way that is unfolding, that’s a whole other thing.

That approach has to not get torn asunder, or impacted, by things that are going on that are going to be hard to contend with. There’s like bugs everywhere, denial and everything, because certainly it just can’t be, you know, and yet it will be.

And yet, at the same time, in spite of all of that going on, the table place setting is that of the meditation dream in which one has to not lose those deep, deep inflections that are freeze-framed in your nature. Don’t shock yourself out of those. There’s a need to hold onto them, not let the outer create the amnesia that then spills – as the amnesia of the outer dictates – spills into a letting go of the freeze frame vibrational qualities that are just imbedded naturally, and function within a depth of one’s self, in spite of the outer conditions of things. Isn’t that interesting how it all pulls together?

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earthquake-cracksJeane’s dream begins with an energetic run outdoors, but quickly verges on catastrophe as an earthquake occurs. What makes a dream image devolve quickly into chaos? Well, in this case, it centers on an internal imbalance between masculine and feminine energies. Masculine energy can act as a trigger, but the feminine needs to be able to contain the energy of what has been triggered, otherwise chaos can ensue. Here, Jeane seeks to re-balance herself in the company of feminine energy. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: In my dream when it starts out I think I had missed my boot camp the day before, so it’s a weekend. I’m living with my family and I decide I’m going to go out running on my own.

I go out and I see some other people from the class there that just like to run because there’s no class that day, it’s Saturday. I start running, and I’m able to suddenly just jump over these small, almost like piles of twigs and stuff, and bushes.

Somehow I get to where I’m just really running and I can jump over these and I go over along the side, and then I go way out almost like on a cliff. And I get out there, and I’ve even climbed down a little, but then I see that this area that I’m on is kind of mossy and that it cuts out underneath.

And then I’m not sure I can get back up on my own, and I could even slide and fall way, way down to some rocks and water, and I see logs in the water so I would hit something. So I’m kind of staying still, and a man comes along and he kind of even stretches out so I can grab his hand, and he’s going to pull me up because I have to be really carefully how I get off this cliff.

Well, just as he’s going to do that, an earthquake hits, and I can see way up behind him where big rocks are falling off – so I just figure I’m a goner. But then this huge tree falls, so I start sliding down the cliff. This huge tree falls such that it’s almost like I can either slide or walk down the tree all the way down across the water to the other side.

None of the rocks that fall hit me or anything, and now I’m on the other side, but down below, so I go over and at some point I find this city that has kind of been built into the rocks. And I have to start climbing up on the outside of the walls in the city. And as I get up, because I keep climbing up because if the earthquake hits this city it would just cave in on itself, but it seems to be holding strong.

Right before I get to the top as I’m climbing up it’s almost like one of the homes that’s built inside this cliff – like there is this whole city inside in a sense. A door opens and there are a couple of women there and they have actually made a whole table full of sandwiches, and I think they’re probably making sandwiches because the earthquake is hitting and they’re going to want to stockpile some food for themselves.

But no, they offer me one so I just take a little corner of one. They’re cut into fourths. I just take a little bit, and then one of the women invites me to another room to lay down for a while, and shuts the door, and we make love, which is a real strange experience because I don’t think I’ve ever made love with a woman before.

And then afterwards it’s like her… she actually has a partner and a girlfriend. She didn’t quite want them to notice this because they might get jealous. Then after that her partner comes into the room, and it’s like she’s even brought us something, some tea or something. Suddenly we go outside and we’re all sitting there.

And the other partner shows up and she has a pot plant, or the leaves of one, and they want to know if I want to either eat… I think I take a bite of it, but I tell them I don’t really smoke things like that, or I don’t take drugs.

It’s time for me to get on my way, so I start walking now and I realize all I’ve got on is this long shirt that comes just above my knees, but it doesn’t seem to matter because I’ve been in the earthquake. It’s kind of a silvery shirt, too. If somebody looks at me I just kind of shrug because after all I’ve been in the earthquake and this is what I have to wear now.

And then I come to an outside area and I’m still trying to figure out how to go home. And I look down and far away on the water I see a speedboat with my dad in it, and I wave. I don’t know if he can see me though. I think that’s when I wake up.  

John: This is a very loud dream. In the dream, it starts off with you accessing something inside yourself, in which you actually go over the top, in which you, by the efforts and whatever it is that you have done, that you suddenly are able to do everything better than ordinary or expected under typical circumstances.

You’re able to jump over things and that sudden sense of freedom sets in motion, it’s almost like too much energy for the situation of yourself, and so it sets in motion this whole reactivity. You have a greater influence on your surrounding environment than you realize, and when you get like that, and especially as you get more and more connected inside, so that you have more and more sense of freedom, and the obstacles in the normal mannerisms in which you’re restrained, or slowed down, no longer are dominant, so that you then can have a more direct influence upon things in the outer.

Which, to begin with, is like suddenly the usual resistances aren’t there, and you’re able to do things with a certain dynamic. But there’s an importance to the sense of balance, and the sense of order, and the sense of going through things within a kind of container.

Your energy has bolted out, and it’s now discombobulating the environment, setting off these earthquakes and landslides and all of this sort of stuff that almost engulfs you. You have a few lucky breaks because it’s like this has happened, but something… it’s not meant to destroy you, it’s meant to cause you to recognize that you have to be able to take in what has occurred.

Now, this disruption and whatnot that you did, if you think about it you did it from a breakthrough that had to do with you having an acuity to push through things, and that acuity to push through things, to have a focus that could push through things, and have a certain freedom as a consequence of pushing through these things. That’s a masculine use of energy.

So now you’re needing, and feeling that you need to take that back, you need to catch up with that, you can’t be like that, that’s too much that came rushing through all of a sudden. And it if it’s going to have that kind of an effect, you’re disturbing things.

So you go to a place, and what was interesting about this place is, in this place you are attempting to find a rest, or a balance, relating more to the feminine side of yourself, relating more to bringing something through in terms of the feminine, and it kind of works that way.

It’s just that you’ve got this in some sort of correspondence that’s not smoothly one to one. In other words, the effect of something of the masculine comes in and touches something in creation, and usually creation is able to respond, and take that into account, and handle it with a certain degree of balance and composure.

But in this particular instance, that which came in, which gave you the dexterity and the freedom to lurch about more casually and readily, was over the top, and caused a disruption, caused the earthquake, caused an upheaval, which meant that it wasn’t received with a balance in terms of the feminine.

So now you’re trying to figure out how to find that balance in terms of the feminine, thus the relationship with another woman to again accentuate, to bring out, the depth of feminine energy so that it can properly correspond, because it didn’t correspond initially.

Initially you raced out with a certain sense of freedom and a breakthrough that put you into kind of a preening euphoria, and had you able to conduct yourself, and act, in a way that surprised you, the way you broke through things.

In other words, you were missing the class within yourself of taking this stuff in natural stride, and so, having lost that ability to do this in conjunction with both above and below, both inner and outer, both expansive and contractive, or however you would say that, being able to carry that with composure.

You’re going to an extreme that lacks the composure in terms of how to carry this, which seems okay on the surface, but is too much for life and causes things to be disturbed, which causes the landslide and earthquake and all of that sort of thing.

And so you don’t mean to do that, so you then go back to the depths inside you, and find how to open up something in terms of your greater ability to absorb or to handle this.

You go back into a house like that in which now the feminine composure is accentuated, and then when the feminine composure is accentuated, then you’re able to go, and move about, in life again, in keeping with the father because you see your father in the distance.

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