Posts Tagged ‘confused in a dream’

2018-05-23-1When we set out to accomplish something, we rarely consider that the journey we make to reach that goal actually is making us right for that new (energetic) state. If we are speaking of a business, we must create the sources of our materials, and build a network of people, and create a work environment, etc. These are all preconditions to the success of the business. Every new process we begin works like this: we must build the energetic assembly – in ourselves – so that what we want can manifest in the physical world. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: So last night I had a lot harder time physically, coughing, waking up, so I disturbed my dreams a fair amount. Or the dreams were so deep early in the evening they weren’t quite pullout-able.

But, later in the morning, I had a dream in which it felt like initially I was with a group of people, and we were traveling more towards a city. And I seem to want to get into the city. But I remember jumping in the water at one point, like there was a dock, and there was water, and I had to go out into the water and come back, and then go into the city.

And it felt like some of you had gotten ahead of me. I wasn’t as quite sure where you were at, but I knew that there was going to be a party at this one man’s house and I went there. He was there alone, but he lost his wife at some point and he’s really grieving a lot. I also seem to have brought some laundry over to wash, but he’s just scattered the laundry I brought over on the kitchen floor.

And he’s sitting, holding me for the longest time, but, after a while, it feels like he’s holding me too long. Although I understand he’s just holding me because maybe he wants to hold someone because he misses his wife. He doesn’t actually misunderstand the situation. But I feel like I need to start looking for where all of you have gone. So I leave.

I think I even get separated from him and I’m looking around this rather crowded city. Some people ask me directions to the party. I mean, I seem to direct them where to go for the apartment, although it’s not set up for a party yet – the laundry’s still scattered all over the kitchen floor.

And then, when I get to this square, I’m a little confused about where to go. But then somebody who’s at the luncheon sees me, and they holler at me, so I’m able to find where they’re at. And I come and you’ve saved a seat next to you that I sit down at. Although, at that point, I think everybody takes away whatever course of food they were eating, so it’ll be another minute before any food is set down. And that’s about all I remember of the dreaming.

John: Sounds like a dream that’s converging, but it’s converging but something hasn’t come out because there’s a space, yet, that you have to abide in, or be held in, which you’re not doing, or don’t understand.

In other words, it’s like some part of you wants to scope out, is trying to stretch out. And it’s as if that stretching out is an aspect of the journey. But it can’t, because that aspect of the journey, and that stretching out, is actually where you function as a kind of container to all that there is going on. And so you can reach out and take in all that’s going on around you.

But there seems to be a pre-existing condition that you have to catch up with first, before you can stretch out, and that is that you have to come to see yourself as being within a container. In other words, you can be a container and stretch out, but first of all you have to see yourself as being in a container – and be okay with being in a container.

It’s kind of an odd kind of thing. It’s like you have a quality of something more that can come to be, but it can’t come to be until something else has solidified, or situated, or come into being as a quality first, as an energetic, or quality, or letting go, first. And that you’re not going along with that aspect. You are striking out, pushing out.

It’s really an awkward reverse image; it’s a feminine trait. It’s a feminine trait that isn’t fully owned.The trait of the feminine, as a theme, or schematic, is the ability to take into account things in the surroundings; to be able to just have a natural perception. And you’re having trouble with that natural perception. And the dream is saying that you’re having trouble with that natural perception because there is a spaciality that you’re not allowing yourself to be held in.

It’s almost as if it’s like you would like to do the holding, or the taking care of, or the accessing and pulling in. And yet there has to be an abiding, on your part, first, as a, say, precondition, for the other to make any sense, in terms of how it could be brought together, or come together.

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images-2Many things can affect our performance during the day: lack of sleep, bad dreams, external pressures, even fear. And these same issues, and many, many more, also affect our ability to respond to our spiritual side. Our higher self always wants to communicate with us, and offer guidance, but if we are overcrowded with other matters the subtlety of the higher aspects within will have difficulty rising to our consciousness. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: And so, in the next dream, I am at a program, and I’m trying to remember if I got a room for a couple of nights in a nearby town, as if I’m determining when it’s time to leave the program. I did get a room for two nights, but when did I do it? And so I have this need to check to see if I did so at this time, or not, because I just don’t know for sure.

In a way it kind of makes sense that maybe I might have because there has been a slight change in the schedule. And it would be good maybe to leave a day early because it’s changed. But if I did the two days this week, as opposed to the next week, I need to actually cancel

it because today is something that’s still important. It’s not time to go for today, but tomorrow night would be okay if I actually did it.

But if I didn’t do it, and it’s for a week from now that I did my two days, I can go along with that too. The thing is, did I anticipate somehow know that there was going to be a gap in the current program that I signed up for, and somehow took this into account? It doesn’t make sense that I would have booked a room somewhere else, at this time, because how was I to know that there would be this gap, or this opening, to where one could check out?

So, I must have been kind of following this mannerism inside that I don’t know for sure, that I have to check, and I have to adjust, if I actually did do this, to cancel that for tonight; tomorrow would be okay, if I’ve done that that way.

So in the confusion, between the two places, as the dream shifts a bit and suddenly you and I are at a ticket counter, and I’ve gone up there with something noodling behind me to ask some pressing question, but I can’t remember why this was so important. Yet here I am, suddenly at the counter, needing to ask a question and, just before I engage the clerk, having kind of obsoleted the issue of why I’m there, because I have apparently resolved it already deep within, you go ahead and tell me that because you are kind of covering the overallness of things somehow, as opposed to the detail, and you say that we’re a little early that they don’t give out the boarding pass for another five minutes.

In others words, we’re still with the program with the shift, but the sight of a clarity of something coming through has changed. Yet, I’m a little amnesic and don’t remember because it’s changed within. And I got it within, but then the memo coming through to the outer didn’t quite gel. And there you are all ready to get the boarding passes.

And then, as I wake up, this is how I learned how the responsibility goes beyond me, a voice says: it’s not your fault. In other words, it’s a discombobulation of myself that gets all wafty. And the greater sight, that I’m meant to catch up with, I didn’t quite catch up with and went stupefied.

So what is going on is I am affected by a stigma that clouds my sense of composure. It affected me in my sense of balance and composure. I was not able to let go of the mannerism. I was supposed to be at a place within that isn’t mired anymore by that sort of thing. I failed this test. It was a test I was not ready to uphold unremittingly yet. In other words, where it’s really clear.

The fact I fell into a stupor and dulling mood because of an affect that got taken in somehow or another was not my fault. My higher self knows better. In other words, it just didn’t get the memo through to where I would have seen it, recognized it, and brought it through – instead of leaving you at the counter still saying, okay, well now we just wait five more minutes and we can get our boarding passes.

So upon accepting that and letting go, what existed was like a projected woundology, on another path, or of me being in another spaciality, not with the succinctness of something coming through my other path, like being caught in the outer nuances of things. That needs to fall away to where you have the one-to-one correspondence, above and below.

So the meaning, too, is what we’re able to see, be, and how, is correlated to where we are at, in the heart, energetically. This is how you would say it, maybe more in a masculine way. How you would say it in a feminine way I’m not exactly sure. But the masculine feels it as a quickened energetic, and in that energetic is knowingness.

So if there is a heaviness or confusion that remains, this confusion shapes what we are able to hear, see, and know and our resultant actions in the outer. And, from the meditation dream, I’m seeing that I cannot sort myself out to what I need to be experiencing, and realizing, and going through when I am beleaguered – a burden I have to let go of.

And, as you get more and more conscious, things change, you will affect things more and more, and, therefore, you have more to contend with. So such a weightiness on the heart causes me to be energetically impaired, and the world around me suffers accordingly. To let go enables me to access the inner essence without all of this otherness clouding up the relationship The other is there, but there is too much on board to reach it directly, so I remain overly clamored up.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: The Impairment

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balanceAt the end of the day, or at the end of our lives, who we are is the sum of what we choose to uphold. On a spiritual path, that means to choose to uphold a life in service to something greater, and to let that truth guide our thoughts and actions. Still, reality has a way of always knocking us off our stride, and part of the management of our lives is to get ourselves back to our core with the least digression, and that means being conscious of when it happens. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In the meditation dream I need to go from where I’m staying, just a couple of blocks down some narrow streets and alleys, to something that’s like a church, or in other words, it’s a sanctuary kind of atmosphere type building, and from there I’m able to leave and go to another destination that I need to go to. But first of all I have to reconnoiter from this place.

It’s almost as if I had taken a walk with somebody to kind of show me the path, so I’m shown the way there by a person, but now I’ve come back and now I have to re-walk those steps on my own with my luggage. I feel that somehow or another I know this inside, even though I cannot rotely describe that you go this way and that way and this way and that way. Somehow I’m going to do this, and after all it’s only a couple, three blocks. How can you screw up?

But the lighting changes, and the streets change. They get narrower and there are darker places. There are things I guess that could throw you off, but only two or three blocks? But when I try to do this myself I blow it, I get lost, and I refuse to try to go back as if I could reconnoiter from where I had left and then give it another shot. I keep thinking I’m going to find it.

And, at one point, I’m realizing these bags are all kind of slowing me down too. If I’m going to stumble across this, I need to set these bags down. So now I’m making a mental note of where I left the bags as I’m wandering around. The next thing I know I’m even more twisted around, and I finally have to realize that I don’t even know where my bags are at, let alone where I came from, let alone the name of the place I’m supposed to be going to – so I can’t even really get advice from anyone.

And at one point it’s so bad that I cross some railroad tracks and I notice I’m down along the wharf or something and I’m running into a bad element; if it wasn’t the daytime they probably could have beat me up or something. It’s all I could do to kind of get back out of that area again, back in the approximate neighborhood of where this is at, but still not have any idea where it’s at.

I see myself going through a Chinese restaurant and finally I realize I am so out of it, and haven’t a clue anymore to where I’m at and what it is that I can possibly do next, that this is so miserable that I force myself to break this impossible irreconcilable condition, force myself awake.

I couldn’t handle it, it was too miserable. At least I always have an option apparently in these other dreams. I had ran out of all options. I had no idea. I couldn’t ask anybody. I don’t even know where my bags are at. I mean I can’t get directions anyhow. It’s gotten too busted up.

So, anyway, what’s going on here is this vibratory confusion was created when my act of imagination – okay, I’m setting the scenario now. In other words, when I started to meditate there was a part of me that started getting really active about something. Actually, I considered it a clarity, but you have to drop all of that. That’s kundalini energy firing up.

This dialogue inside, even though it can seem wonderful and entertaining, twists the vibe of a balance and I wasn’t able to go somewhere at a greater depth. It kept me in kind of a little mud puddle trance. And so I tried to listen to the inner sound and let all of this fall away, and it worked, but only apparently to a degree because something malingered, or remained, and that triggers this whole episode of an imbalance-like amnesia.

I’m actually not properly in the inner space, and I’m a little out of control. I’m still spiraling a bit. What is interesting is that a vibe like this, you know, and we have these vibes like this in the outer all the time where our attention goes and we get all carried away, and then we don’t do what else, and what is needed that is imperative. We can’t hear the inner qualities, the intuitional qualities or however you want to say it because we put ourselves in a bit of an oppressed demeanor.

In other words, it can get to the point where you feel you need to do something, but can’t do it because you’re possessed by this other. You can even see it as you’re procrastinating and can’t help the fact that you’re procrastinating because you’re strung out by this other thing that’s holding your attention.

To be in a state like this is to be out of touch. In other words, every person has kind of a focus and attention in terms of trying to conduct themselves. Usually it’s very linear and they’re lost by that. But it can be fluid, but still be an imbalance lilting this way and that way instead of maintaining a clear-cut focus and attention in which things continue to flow.

This dream is accentuating the miserableness I feel when I go astray of that which is pressing to come through me as a clarity that I ignore, because I am caught up by this energetic way of pulling my attention. To be like this is to get lost more and more until I just can’t stand being in my own skin anymore. In other words, that’s when you just throw it all off because if you don’t then something will have to happen that will smack you in the outer to kind of bring you back hopefully to yourself. That’s when you can get sick, you can have an accident, because you’re out of tangent with what it is that you’re supposed to be able to recognize, or to see, or to experience, or do.

In the dream I force myself awake to break out of the miserableness. In manifestation, when I go off on a tangent like this I suffer until something relieves me of my misery, which usually is not necessarily something that I like. I might just have a catastrophe. That causes the thing if I can’t drop the affliction or addiction that will do it.

The meditation dream points out what it is that I am doing to myself by such a vibe. This vibe is taking me towards a disastrous outcome. That’s how I know it to be in the outer, and in the inner it’s a point of frustration of complete confusion. There are no answers because everything is reflectively off as well.

This is a problem with a lot of people in life who are lost with how they are meant to resonate. In other words, they’ve lost the note to it, the inner overall awareness, and when you lose that, that kind of inner quality, echo side of yourself, or however you want to call it, where you lose the light would be maybe another way of describing it, you’re not able to cope anymore. You know, you’re just a walking zombie.

This is a problem in life for people who lose the inner note to their well being, can’t find it anymore, and no longer can find the insightfulness in which they reach a point in which having lost the thread they’re unable to make sense out of anything.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: Losing the Note

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