Posts Tagged ‘connecting to our inner guidance’

If we were to completely let go, all at once, it would feel to us like being in free fall. Most of us wouldn’t like that feeling, so we would tighten ourselves up and resist it, rather than opening our arms and feeling the freedom of the wind. This is the inner struggle we wage to let go of our desire for ego control and to embrace the flow of universal grace. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: What I did, which started off for me to experience the state of spaciousness, or expansiveness, or in-breath quality, is a type of deliriousness. 

In other words, in the meditation dream, I’m trying to determine how to orient myself in an overallness. But I’m in the spaciousness, how do I orient myself? I know that somehow that that’s my motif, I’m used to orienting, pulling something down into a rootedness, or definition or something. How do I do that? 

So the feeling of being out of balance, in the overallness before me, is a sensation on the in-breath, as an imbalance. As a kind of, more than imbalance, it’s being in a state of having to sort something out because it’s overwhelming in its bewilderment. 

What is going on is I am seeking to perceive how to feel okay in life before me, like we’re always trying to make our world jell when the circumstances are overwhelming, and the circumstances are overwhelming because I’m in an in-breath. 

Basically, the schematic of evolvement is that you do an out-breath coming down, and apparently must have some cognition of in-breath. Or at least something happens to where the cognition of the in-breath comes into a greater predominance, and the out-breath stuff doesn’t work as well anymore. And so things can fall apart. 

And when things fall apart, then you find yourself in a scramble to try to find an orientation. And you try to find that orientation again in some new shifted way, inside of yourself, because you can’t quite do what you had been doing. You kind of know better, maybe you didn’t know better when it actually worked more for you. When you crack up a little bit like that, it’s a little bit like having a breakdown, you find yourself having to yet sort out the spaciousness. And you’re used to control; you’re used to having something shipshape. 

So to be out of control, vibratorally, is the result of not being able to come to grips with one’s whereabouts in the outer – like you’re used to doing. And thus you can have this insecurity that plagues, vibratorally speaking, because everything is up in the air. 

So in the dream, this seeking of access, within the schematic of a greater overallness, denotes that there is something missing about your usual way of trying to contract. A contraction that you probably could even say is a type of linear groundedness. But you cannot find it, this greater overallness, in the surroundings anymore. In other words, because your surroundings have shifted, something has changed. And so you’re in a sensation in which there is an instability because it’s a bewildering overallness. 

So, in the dream, I took the sensation to an extreme. Usually, this is like a type of self-image issue. In other words, you don’t know who you are, so you don’t know how to maintain a demeanor or find a demeanor in there. And so it really can feel awkward if you’re used to having some sense of control for your natural orientation. But where is that? 

Now what is really, really bad is the person has to continue to pretend even when it’s all blown to smithereens. That’s really, really bad because then you look actually silly because people can feel something that’s not quite balanced. 

So what is going on is, in the working backwards to catch up with an outer-self orientation, because that’s what I’m still trying to do, in other words, I’m not willing to sit in this greater spaciousness. I still want to identify or find an identification of self, instead of seeing the identification of self and everything outside of myself, and being able to keep going into a greater and greater, to the point that I hit an absolute letting go. I’m looking for the sensation of gravitating to where things fit back in. 

This dilemma is compounded when a control fear predominates. And the fear predominates when you’re used to being in control and you’re in this other bewilderment. It’s a very strange feeling to be overwhelmed within an outer scenario, whereby the soul is struggling to find itself anew and you’re not used to letting it find itself anew. You’re used to having things nailed down.

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visionsAs we talk about inner guidance and connections to higher things, at some point we have to wonder: what is the limit of our interconnectedness to the world and universe around us?  And the answer seems to point to the idea that if we can develop the connections, there is virtually nothing we can’t gain access to. And that can mean glimpsing the future, as well. Certainly some people have the ability, so that means we all could be capable in the right circumstance – because it’s part of the human design. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So the first dream in terms of this is to break the spiritual concept that, when something speeds up, that it’s always good, and that when something can be done that can appear very magical and transformational, in terms of the outer, that that is always good. It’s not necessarily good if it doesn’t take into account the bigger picture down the road, which is where prophecy comes in.

So in the meditation dream I come to know a new way of doing a mannerism that is faster and more effective than the way I had been doing this. I adopt this faster way. This particular faster way has a collateral damage effect that rubs off. I am unable to change the attention from what had been an eventful event. In other words, something that on a sensation level that was wonderful, also conflicts with something, and if I’m not subtly and sensitively aware and do not take that which is conflicting within to account, then there is a collateral effect.

In other words, I would be misusing my speed, my energy, my sight. In the way this needs to unfold, energetically, what has happened has in terms of the whole something has been inadvertently altered, in other words, it didn’t take into account everything. In other words, I made a mistake in terms of adopting this process. I didn’t take something into account in terms of how it fit with every little aspect of things.

And had I, there would have been a relief sensationally and simultaneously in which any of the slower nuances and veils that people carry would have fallen away and there would have just been a wonderful… everyone would have felt a wonderful sensation. They may not have been able to explain why it’s a wonderful sensation, but they would have felt it.

So to go back to how things had been is no longer possible. In other words, this sort of thing is meant to unfold and that’s why it is presented with all of its sensation potentialities. So the new way has to occur so it’s not caught in some sort of set perceived awareness that it’s fluid like that and awakening.

So, as a consequence, I suddenly realize I have the problem of figuring out how to shift, in other words, take something that is speeded up and being able to shift that into the awareness of something that is slower so that it gets it, too. It has to get it, too, or otherwise there’s going to be a subtle tearing away. I am troubled by the realization that I now have created a problem as the limitation comes into life, in other words, where something is faster and when something is slower, and the faster has to be embraced, but to embrace it it has to be part of the overall natural design, and if it isn’t part of the overall natural design, then you have a problem. No matter how good you see something, it has to include or be intertwined with everything.

The reason I had a dream like this was to point out how hard it is to slow down a flow and get rid of a result that conflicts with something so that there is a collateral effect limitation in terms of how the future overall can be. So you have to feel that, to sense that, to see that, and that’s where the prophetic comes in.

So the meaning is because recordings are being made of this quicker effect upon the present, in other words, on some level a recordings are being made of this, or it’s unfolding, in other words it’s playing out as a movie. The trait I cause to happen becomes more and more entrenched. In other words, I’m trying to make it denser and denser if I’m not careful, and I’m not supposed to do that.

The challenge is to get everyone to realize that in the fullness of time the net effect is beneficial, or if you can’t do that then there’s a counterproductive quality that will undermine things. And in the dream I am struggling to make sure that I get others to receive what I’m doing. In other words, I am prophetically feeling how the future needs to be in terms of the result effect, because if I miss something then whatever struggles is deleterious to the process.

So the thing is, is if I can’t tell people so that they are able to understand, because for them to understand they would have to have the prophetic awareness awoken in their being, then I am not able to properly take in that full sight. So I have to be able to bring even that through, inner into outer, so that they can rejoice in terms of what is happening.

Because this isn’t so, all I can do is sit with what I know. I lack the means to communicate such an awareness until such a consciousness side has awakened in the overall flow. I’m acting like that happens independently or something, but it doesn’t. A human being has to be able to bring that through, and bring it through for others.

This dream explains why it is that I am troubled by not being able to get others to understand a perception I have, and that perception I have is based upon a prophetic quality that I inflect. To truly understand requires this prophetic area to be awoken in the environment. It is awoken from within, and this must occur before what I am trying to communicate is able to be heard.

In other words, when I take and I do certain things it creates a certain reaction because I say this or see that and others don’t get it, and they ask me questions and I can’t even explain it to them. It doesn’t really come into life unless you can do that, unless you can somehow with your physical being, presence, or mannerism you can cause that to be known in some capacity. Otherwise, there’s that little gap or veil that’s there. And until that goes away, what is more apparent in the immediate present dominates and controls the focus and attention.

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dream-22Something in us knows, something in us is smarter and more connected to the universe than our conscious brain. Much of the work of spiritual development is to stop listening exclusively to our rational mind and instead connect to the inner parts of us that do know and are connected. And if we listen closely, we can hear its subtle guidance all the time.(At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: The way I dreamt about this sort of thing was, first of all, I went to the extreme of being kind of separate, so the image I see in the meditation dream accentuates the vibe of covering up an imbalance I see and, in covering it up, I’m seeking to rewrite history. I don’t think one can do that, but that’s what I’m trying to do – and that creates a type of separation and an aloneness.

So I’m concerned after this effort to change the appearance of what is going on, or has occurred, for the image that I’m having to contend with is something’s been shot, and shot right between the eyes. You know, in the forehead. And when I’m trying to change things, or to rearrange the appearance, or to soften it, or whatever, what I’m doing is I’m covering this up.

I’m putting something that looks like a postage stamp over the top of it. And there’s something about this thing that I put on there it has stick ‘em, it’ll stick. And it somehow or another helps to close the wound, or to fix that, or to cover it up. And this stamp has something to it like the glue or whatever that is part of this process, so that when it’s all said and done, you don’t even notice that that had occurred.

I’m hiding it, I’m covering it up. It has occurred, so this is a bit of a lie as far as an expression goes, because a forensic expert trying to figure out what has occurred, if there are suspicions or something, might discover a kind of substance there, a foreign substance, that has changed things a bit and, therefore, realize that there is foul play going on.

Well I’m looking at a step-by-step way that these clues could start coming out that would lead to the evidence that would point to me as the murderer. Isn’t that an odd dream?

So in this dream, a vibe that is off, is accentuated. In other words, the imbalance is accentuated. By having to feel this weigh upon me, I will hopefully notice how my perception is being clouded. In other words, I’m doing strange things because I’m not thinking clearly because the vibe is off.

In other words, one’s not in sync or in flow with the outer environment around you, and you can know that, you can see that about yourself. By trying to cover up the seriousness of a mistake that is on the verge of blowing up in my face, what I’m doing is adopting a mannerism. I call it “distraught,” but there might be a better word because what it does is you feel this, but then you’re stymied, you’re stuck, you’re frozen.

You don’t know how to change it, either, because you don’t have the clarity or the succinctness in your nature. It just kind of leaves you in a trance. It clouds your inner sense of a knowingness and, instead of being able to function from a place of clarity, you adopt almost a blind hope or wishful thinking.

So the dream is saying to me, if you are sincere in seeking consciousness then do not go along with the situation that continues to maintain constant weight upon your overall being. Adhere to the clarity. In other words, you kind of have a sense of a flow. Reckon and beckon towards that, and let that talk to how you need to be, or what you need to do, or whatever.

Do what I have to do to remain open to a natural knowingness. Know how to let go of indulgences that compromise the inevitable. To be able to let go to whatever it is that is to happen when I have made an energetic miscue – this is where I notice that I always get stuck.

I am bound to get stuck from time to time and, when I do, I just need to face the issue before it buries you. In other words, if you stay stuck then you go dumber and dumber, and dumber and dumber and, at the very beginning, you have a sense that you’ve gone astray a bit.

So I am able to denote the need to realize that I am on a tangent if I listen to an innerness that speaks to me in a subtle way. And this innerness does this with kind of some little slight flinch, or stab to the heart, that occurs as a type of impulse. And that’s like a way in which it’s reacting to something that isn’t quite right, or it can be something that explodes openly. So I am being trained to, little-by-little, adhere to the quiet inner language that manifests as a kind of energetic inner voice.

But first things first. I have to recognize the heebie-jeebie accentuated uneasiness that is clouding my connective clarity, and strive for a clarity as being an inner flow. And instead, of course, I seem to be figuring out ways to rationalize or to make it work and, therefore, not accepting the degree to which I’m slaughtering life’s energy.

So, that’s the first dream.

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