Posts Tagged ‘connecting to the beloved’

John: So yesterday we looked at the first in this series of dreams (see Not Being There), and each subsequent dream progresses in a way that seeks to fix, or evolve, the situation into a better state, from within, but it’s still off. The general inspiration for these dreams is our recent transition from the Northwest to the city of Las Vegas, and our process of making adjustments within ourselves as a result of the different environmental factors

The next images have me preparing to meet with someone. I’ve spent more than 15 minutes trying to get my glasses clean because all kinds of weird stuff has fallen on them. I’m trying to scrape it off.

I see that I’m veering away from where I’m expected to go. When I get to a building, I realize that I still need some sort of metal object that can slice; I need something that’s strong and firm enough that it can cut through things. I must build it myself.

I have permission to go into an area where odds and ends are stored to select something that might work to help rectify the condition. I take out four objects in an effort to alleviate the situation. I think I can use a welding tool to cobble things into place, but what I’ve selected doesn’t work because when I apply any heat to it, it will melt or burn through the material. The tools I have do not have what it takes to hold something in place, so I’m using this material to create something that can slice through. 

Meanwhile, I need to set this project aside because I’m running late and I nearly compromise my principles because I’m under pressure. At the last minute I clean up after the work I’ve done.

In other words, I tried to cut a little of this off, I tried to burn a little of that off, and I made a bit of a mess. I pick up after myself and take what’s left of the implements – they need to be returned. They didn’t work for me, but maybe they can be used as components for something else. I look around to see if I can make anything else work for what I need.

Someone is coming over so I have to put everything aside for now. But instead of putting the tools into a closet or some drawers where they would best be kept, I put some of them into a refrigerator. I can straighten that out later, but at the moment I need to gain some composure for my meeting.

What is this showing me? Well, although I still haven’t accomplished what I was trying to do, I’m aware of what the problem is – I just haven’t acquired the proper tools that I need to be successful.

However, I do realize that I must look within myself for what I need, in order to find balance in the outer life. This will take time, but at least I’m looking around (within) for the tools to resolve the imbalance. If I were looking for the solution in the outer life, I would be in serious trouble.

In the next dream, the imagery moves further toward a sense of completion (after that, my dreams again start to deviate from it, showing that nothing is complete, all is just a step forward and then it all starts over again).

In this dream, I find a condo that I feel I can make into a place of balance. I notice that in doing this, other apartment units near mine start changing, shaping themselves up to be more in a balanced energetic.

So what had been a state of confusion and chaos, in terms of everything being too much to cope with (because of the sensory overload of Las Vegas), is now being brought into greater alignment. I see that I’m able to move about without feeling so lost.

What this adds to the scenario is that, if I take the time to look at what lies within – as an awareness, or as an answer – I’m better able to flow in the maze of the outer world. I’m learning how to hold onto and apply an inner connection that is able to reach into all that is before me.

And I’m starting to find the value latent within (the outer world of Las Vegas) that I ordinarily don’t reach (nor do most people). Nearly everyone in Las Vegas is expecting to catch up with the meaning of this place in some sort of outer reflection, and that is just a veil over what is really here.

Read Full Post »

John: Well, your dream yesterday (see Going Hollywood) begins with you having lost your connection with your boyfriend, which symbolizes, in this instance “the beloved.” Once the linkage with the beloved is dropped, then you’re basically on your own, designing whatever experience seems to be the most appealing or the most interesting to you.

But because you’ve had a connection to something greater (the beloved) none of your actions amount to anything, no matter how hard you try. In trying to do it “your way” – as if you really have the freedom to do as you like – you realize that you don’t have anything to offer that you can cause, or make, happen.

Even though the new “beloved” (Jack Nicholson) looks interesting conceptually, you can’t make it happen, you’re unable to sell it to yourself. When you realize this, you wonder about it, and in the wondering you realize that, in order for something to occur, it’s going to have to be something that has a degree of relatability in the physical world. In other words, it has to occur outside of how you perceive yourself.

So, when you had a connection with something that was like the beloved, inside of you, you had a certain awareness of it. Any attempt to try to recreate that on your own won’t work. Ultimately, what you’re meant to be shown, or to see, about that is an acknowledgment that what is awakening in the outer is something divine, or something distinct from the limitations of the ways of the outer world. The dream shows you being able to perceive that when you connect with the little girl and the baby boy.

That is the beginning of what is real. Now, what do that little girl and baby boy really represent? They are a quality of the divine that’s inside your heart, which you can catch up with. If you catch up with that divine quality, that’s what gives life meaning, because that is what is real. Everything else that goes on in the outer world (of your dream) – the elevator, the hotel room, the crowd of people, is just presented to try to distract you from that. So, if you can keep your attention on the idea that you’re coming back to this divine quality (that you were separated from at the beginning of the dream), a feeling of closeness emerges in recognition of that.

If you didn’t know any better, you would be trying to make the best out of your relationship with things in the outer world, and would be continually going around and around, driven by the sense that you can’t catch up with it or you don’t recognize it. But in the dream you do know better, and therefore whatever it is that you try to do, or see yourself doing, to make something happen in the outer on a relatability-level (because the feminine has to take everything into account like she is the container), isn’t really acceptable to you.

Within your heart of hearts, you recognize that something is trying to emerge. So you find yourself having the responsibility of caring for the little girl and baby boy – in the final analysis, that’s the only thing that can make the connection you’re interested in. And the little girl and boy are tiny, and it is your journey to protect them and allow them to grow, rather than putting your efforts into the growth of the outer world, i.e., appearances and relationships based only in the material world. You can see that, even though nobody else you come across can see that. It may not fit for everyone in the world, but it fits for you, because you know that this is how you’re supposed to be.

In other words, it’s kind of like going back to basics. You’ve gotten an idea of how something inside of you works as a relationship, as a beloved trait, and now you can’t settle for anything in the outer that doesn’t include that. You’ve gone back to that world and you’ve tried to do without it, but you’ve seen that all of the plans or intentions that you pull together might be curious and interesting, yet they all leave something to be desired – they’re empty relationships. They don’t compare with what you have already been touched by, i.e., the beloved.

So, the scenes unfold in the dream as a somewhat distraught state, because the universe is not happy when you seek to take it on by yourself, i.e., you get no outside help and things don’t come together smoothly. This is a very Sufi-oriented dream, because there comes a point where you suddenly see that there’s something inside of you that’s like a little person, which needs to be cared for and nurtured. The dream shows you that that is where your attention needs to be.

Read Full Post »