Posts Tagged ‘deviation from the higher self’

Jeane: In this scenario I’ve gone outside in an older, walled city and there’s a funeral precession going by. The people are carrying the body on a platform and it’s covered by a shroud. 

I can tell that it’s a young girl of about 9 years old who’s died. I’m wondering where the parents are. Then I see the parents, who are fairly young, being carried in a large boat, and there are other people in the boat, too.

The parents sit at the very back, the father on one side wrapped up in his grief, and the mother on the other side. She throws herself down on the bench in her grief and, when she does that, her dress comes up so she’s exposed. I’m wishing someone would cover her up a bit because she seems so exposed in her grief.

John: What’s going on in this dream is the imbalance you’ve become aware of is coming across as a type of grief. It’s similar to the shame you felt in the earlier part of the dream (see Thick as a Brick), but grief is the lower octave. Longing is the higher octave.

The longing leads to the death, not the grief of the death, but the longing leads through whatever death there is, or separation there is, within. The grief doesn’t go through it. The grief leaves you and causes you to experience something that’s more than you’re able and willing to accept.

Thus the grief can lead back to a further delusion, or veiling, or separation. But the longing – in the face of something that has changed or died or is no longer meant to be – is an echo deep, deep inside that carries you all the way back to the very first aspect, right from the very beginning.

In other words the beginning and the end are one and the same. Your beginning image saw you heading to a home where you knew your mother was and you had a full sense of this. Then you got deviated and in that deviation you took on guilt and shame. Well, since that needs to change, that’s where the teacher comes in to change it, so that you can now follow the note of yourself all the way back.

In this part of the dream, instead of this being called shame, it’s seen as grief; some part of you has died. This is totally preoccupying you, but on a higher octave you should know that the way you’re meant to feel that separation and distance is with the longing that will help you awaken to the echoed vibration that will see you through again.

This is more information, in terms of how one shifts in one’s ability or responsibility to be able to hear and hold a particular vibratory note. You have a sense of that in the second part of the dream (see The Teacher Inside) where you look to hear the quality of the masculine coming through that holds the note.

This grief thing is very, very interesting. It’s a sadness that you are taking on a little bit. It’s needing to find a connection with the earth or something in order to put you back in touch with what you know as a state, or point in time, that’s meant to be. And yet there’s a disturbance.

Your sense of what you’re drawn to in the outer redeems all of that, and puts you in touch with something that rises up – that’s what it does, it rises up. It’s like a light touching light. It’s a type of longing. Longing does that.

Wow. Very complicated dream.

What you’re doing is you’re describing the schematic, a flow chart for how to Travel In God. Because what you’re doing is you’re laying out the blueprint for how it works. It shows that you don’t hold the same principles of things against you, when you’re in this deeper part of yourself.

When you’re shifted in this part of you, you don’t hold onto the grief – it’s counterproductive. Shame, again, isn’t natural. These are conditions that impact the ability to Travel In God. You don’t really wrestle with the grief or the guilt when you’re Traveling Towards God. You don’t know where that fits in.

But when you’re trying to Travel In God, all of that now has to be taken into account.

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John: So yesterday we looked at the first in this series of dreams (see Not Being There), and each subsequent dream progresses in a way that seeks to fix, or evolve, the situation into a better state, from within, but it’s still off. The general inspiration for these dreams is our recent transition from the Northwest to the city of Las Vegas, and our process of making adjustments within ourselves as a result of the different environmental factors

The next images have me preparing to meet with someone. I’ve spent more than 15 minutes trying to get my glasses clean because all kinds of weird stuff has fallen on them. I’m trying to scrape it off.

I see that I’m veering away from where I’m expected to go. When I get to a building, I realize that I still need some sort of metal object that can slice; I need something that’s strong and firm enough that it can cut through things. I must build it myself.

I have permission to go into an area where odds and ends are stored to select something that might work to help rectify the condition. I take out four objects in an effort to alleviate the situation. I think I can use a welding tool to cobble things into place, but what I’ve selected doesn’t work because when I apply any heat to it, it will melt or burn through the material. The tools I have do not have what it takes to hold something in place, so I’m using this material to create something that can slice through. 

Meanwhile, I need to set this project aside because I’m running late and I nearly compromise my principles because I’m under pressure. At the last minute I clean up after the work I’ve done.

In other words, I tried to cut a little of this off, I tried to burn a little of that off, and I made a bit of a mess. I pick up after myself and take what’s left of the implements – they need to be returned. They didn’t work for me, but maybe they can be used as components for something else. I look around to see if I can make anything else work for what I need.

Someone is coming over so I have to put everything aside for now. But instead of putting the tools into a closet or some drawers where they would best be kept, I put some of them into a refrigerator. I can straighten that out later, but at the moment I need to gain some composure for my meeting.

What is this showing me? Well, although I still haven’t accomplished what I was trying to do, I’m aware of what the problem is – I just haven’t acquired the proper tools that I need to be successful.

However, I do realize that I must look within myself for what I need, in order to find balance in the outer life. This will take time, but at least I’m looking around (within) for the tools to resolve the imbalance. If I were looking for the solution in the outer life, I would be in serious trouble.

In the next dream, the imagery moves further toward a sense of completion (after that, my dreams again start to deviate from it, showing that nothing is complete, all is just a step forward and then it all starts over again).

In this dream, I find a condo that I feel I can make into a place of balance. I notice that in doing this, other apartment units near mine start changing, shaping themselves up to be more in a balanced energetic.

So what had been a state of confusion and chaos, in terms of everything being too much to cope with (because of the sensory overload of Las Vegas), is now being brought into greater alignment. I see that I’m able to move about without feeling so lost.

What this adds to the scenario is that, if I take the time to look at what lies within – as an awareness, or as an answer – I’m better able to flow in the maze of the outer world. I’m learning how to hold onto and apply an inner connection that is able to reach into all that is before me.

And I’m starting to find the value latent within (the outer world of Las Vegas) that I ordinarily don’t reach (nor do most people). Nearly everyone in Las Vegas is expecting to catch up with the meaning of this place in some sort of outer reflection, and that is just a veil over what is really here.

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Here we offer the analysis to the dream The Envelopes, Please.

John: The first thing I noticed when I woke up was my physical feeling – it felt like I had been punched in the nose, to the point where it seemed I could taste blood. This was a weird sensation that I’ve never had before.

I also had the sense that in the dream, when I was opening the envelopes, I was at a deep, deep level inside. I felt okay in what I was doing at that point because I had a sense of knowing what was required. I mean, I was playing around with gauging the sizes of these envelopes, and filling in the confirmations, but it wasn’t until I started lowering the vibration – basically into the physical level – that I began to feel guilt about what I doing.

Then I began to imagine other people witnessing what I was doing and I felt even worse. At that point I had the feeling that I was cowering, because, obviously, what gives me the right to properly take into account everything in terms of the envelopes and the required confirmations – for other people?

So how can I explain that sense of knowing, of wholeness, that I had in the beginning, to those living in a world of separation, i.e., the other workers and the people at the library? I mean, as I woke up I had no idea what I was going to say to the people who stopped me. I had given the contents of these envelopes, with all different names on them, at the entrance to a place where you can only bring in what belongs to you.

So, this dream has a very interesting meaning to it, in that it shows that I need to be absolutely sure that everything I do has no presumption to it in any way. In other words, for me to not be presumptuous means that however I perceive something at a deep inner level, it must be carried all the way through – to the outer, physical world – intact.

I can’t allow the spirit energy to come down and be confused by me when it hits. If I have a knowing at this deep, inner level, where I can somehow have a sense of what other things require, it also means that I’m out in the open because in that space everything is known. It’s just like being an integrated part of the whole. But if I don’t catch up to the whole of it, then my shortfall is seen as deviation. The key is to get so that I’m no longer causing the deviation.

Everything flows from the top down, or from the inner to the outer, and needs to be opened up in a particular way, for a particular reason. The more we are able to open it up without deviation, the less disoriented and separated things will be.

On a microcosmic level, I’m still seeing myself as individual. To get beyond that, I have to go inside myself and open up these other levels; otherwise I’m always acting in an individual way. The view of separateness is an illusion.

I have to go inside to see the bigger picture, and then bring that all the way through to the outer. It’s like in your dream (see A Quality of Consciousness), you wanted the light switches to change the lights the whole way through, not just track something.

I’m just catching up with how, and who, and what I’m meant to do to be free of any presumption. I can’t do that unless I catch up with the higher self and bring it all the way through – I have to live it.

The dream is saying I haven’t done that yet. I’m not surrendering everything I am. It shows something in my nature is still interceding in some unconscious way. Only when I have totally let go will I have the right to look into the mirror of that which is intended (the higher self). Only when I quit identifying with the lower self completely will I get aligned.

Until then, I’m being presumptuous to think that I have any right at all, except to open my mail and my mail only (because on a larger level, it’s all my mail). I must not pay attention to anyone else’s path (mail).

If you start paying attention to anyone else’s path, how are you going to see what’s going on inside yourself? So, if I do pay attention, I’m setting myself up for consequences, and I’m not prepared yet to face those consequences.

So I had to open my eyes. It is truly that I am as a thought of God – that is how I’m to find myself. I haven’t done that yet. I will be shown from within all there is that I am to know and do. I must never forget that.  Whatever it is that I see or think about is contaminating to that; it’s an outer view.

So, this dream is saying that I’m being irresponsible. I haven’t caught up with the bigger picture yet, so everything I’m doing now is only an echo of what can be brought through. I’m not fully taking into account the bigger picture and I’m not taking full responsibility. My actions (with the mail) are still affecting others, because I don’t know who “others” are yet.

I don’t see “others” as completely myself and, because I don’t, I have no right to step into their shoes. What the dream is saying is that I’ve stepped into their shoes, and I’m not flowing properly, so I will be held accountable and have to pay the price if, in my undertaking, I’m unable to take everything into account.

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