Posts Tagged ‘dreams and spirituality’

self-awareness-involutionIt takes a lot of trust in the wisdom of the universe to fully surrender our lives to higher purposes. But there is also the issue of trusting ourselves, on an inner level, to do what we say we are going to do. We all have the experience of making firm decisions in our lives, and then, somewhere down the road, we backslide and don’t honor our earlier decisions. These small failures – inner failures, that no one else may ever know about –  are not forgotten by our inner lives and, if we have a long history of doing this, it can make it difficult for our systems to trust us when do we make an important choice later in life. Yet being aware of this inner mechanic can help us see our decisions through. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In the meditation dream I’m swept along by a situation. The situation is that I am in the outer with a lot of companions, some are older, some are younger.

The ones that are older recognize that what is going on has no real meaningfulness for them, so they go back home. So I’m still with everyone else, and this is seen to be easy for the parts of myself that must contend with the outer condition in a collective way.

It’s not easy. It’s uncomfortable is really what it is, but it’s easy to just go along with something like that. It’s uncomfortable because one’s not listening. One is just allowing something like that to be there because something in one’s succinctness to the knowingness of the essence of the Will is missing.

And so I now try to explain it. When the older parts of myself go back to where we had all been, once upon a time, originally and leaves me with the others who are still trying to find meaning in the outer, these parts that are still trying to find meaning in the outer are not enjoying life – but want to see things through energetically. In other words, as if you can go somewhere.

I would like to go home, just like the older parts of myself have done, but that is a choice that I am not able to find support for from the younger parts of myself, yet. So I carry on in the outer going through the motions. It is my hope that the younger parts of myself will realize that this isn’t going anywhere. My sense is that it kind of gets it, and it’s close to yielding, but the momentum of the outer still has a hold. It is more like a kind of trance-like condition because there isn’t much meaning in continuing on like that is doing.

So when I suggest we go back home, this more youthful part is inclined to be obstinate. In other words, I need to recognize what it is that the going back is, and am I acknowledging it to be temporary – meaning that we go back, we freshen up in some fashion, and then we go at it again. And this part feels that this is where I’m really coming from.

So it’s kind of in a “why bother?” state of mind. By that I mean it is inclined to continue with the way things are, even though there isn’t a meaningful future in this, because to go back home and then to come back at it again, in other words, to do this sort of thing where nothing changes, to this more youthful part of myself seems ridiculous.

So my more youthful part kind still may trying to still yet believe that there’s something that can change, or be done or something, remains entrenched in the outer because, even though it knows that nothing can really be done, it remains entrenched in the outer because it recognizes that this other little part of myself that’s in between the older and the younger is inclined to try to ride in between or something, or to go home and then come back, in other words, reconnoiter,

And so it’s not going to do that, so it remains entrenched in the outer because if I don’t really get it, it just as well stay the course rather than herky-jerky about. That’s a strange dream huh?

The meaning is that I am tired of not living what I perceive as being a more meaningful part of myself from within. The more wizened, or older, parts of myself get it and they let go, but the rest of me is in a daze yet. I would like to stop, and of course you feel the stop parts in terms of how something affects the heart, but seem to be under the spell of my more youthful side that is caught up in the outer – even though deep down it, too, has its qualms. So it doesn’t stop, it continues, because it’s not willing to quit temporarily only.

It feels like my decision to go home and catch up within is fickle. In other words, it’s fickle because it’s a type of lying to myself, or spiritual illusion, or whatever, but once I have done that then I just basically get back into some sort of square one, then I’ll just go back into the outer. So why bother? Consequently, by going back into the outer now, I mean I’m going back into fuddling around in some fashion like that as if there is something to be done.

There’s nothing to be done. You just have to hold the quality of something that is an inner, and you have to hold that in the outer. You don’t shift the outer to stay in the outer, as opposed to recognize the importance of the inner flow, and the inner access, is to not have any trust. It’s to act like you still have a way of steering things. Currently the spell I’m under, in terms of the outer trance, continues even though this goes against the better inner judgement.

My dilemma is: what am I going to do after I catch up with myself? Am I going to go back into my familiar outer image in a kind of a business as usual way? Because if that is where I am really coming from, then why bother just slapping the door back and forth? I should just tough it out rather than yo-yo and, of course, I mean this is the story I tell myself inside that keeps me in a spell.

The deeper effect is the spell binding trance I am in – if I do not reach the recognition that I am to stop, look, and denote where the more wizened heart of the world soul is at. Because I have given up before, doesn’t mean I will trance out again, so I should not let this sort of sloppy thinking, or spiritual illusion about it all, interfere with what I know is astir at the inner soul level of my being.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: A Lack of Trust

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soundwave-sound-wave-3d-rendering-oWe all know what it’s like to have trouble downloading something from the Internet: if we don’t have the exact ID and password, it’s impossible to do; i.e., if we’re off by one number, we’re not “close.” Well, it is the universal nature of energy that like is attracted to like, so if we want to attract kindness into our lives, then we have to begin to radiate kindness ourselves – and that radiation will energetically draw in the frequencies of kindness as well. But if we say we want kindness, but radiate judgment and anger, kindness will not be able to find us. This is why “the rich get richer,” because if you already have a quality (energetically), you will always attract more of it. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: I wish I could pull more of my dream through because it felt like I was just struggling with it. And in the dream it was like I was downloading experiences, and I was doing it with somebody else, a man.

And then there was a series of experiences that I was having trouble downloading, or uploading, however you would consider it, and I had to get things aligned in order to do it, and then I had to judge whether or not it was kind of going to be an overload for the person, or not, or the sequence, or how they were stored right now.

And I just seemed to be struggling to get that right, wanted to get a certain balance with it, and I was trying to juggle it, and going over it, and evaluating it, maybe discussing it, just trying to get it right to download. That’s all I really remember about the dream.

John: So you were just going through, constantly trying to contend with the sorting of something out that stood in between two things from happening, or coming together – right?

Jeane: Yeah.

John: Well, that was the nature of the theme of the dreams last night, was that there is a need to aspire to the vibration within, which pulls together, and aligns, on various levels.

And, in the outer, it is often times expressed as some insignificant thing that seems to be a complexity, or issue, and it’s generally considered fairly trite, you know, when you’re dreaming it.  And if you can just resolve it, then the sensation is that a flow is then possible, or intertwining is able to happen.

It is easy to not see or notice the dilemma, or the small, trite issue, and when one doesn’t notice this the energetic condition that they carry is one of bewilderment. And when you walk around in a bewilderment you take on moods, and mannerisms, that weigh upon the heart because you are not in flow with the outer from within – and are instead caught in a conundrum of the reflections in the outer that predominate.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: A Vibration Within

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thu2It is often hard to describe what coming from inner into outer actually looks, or feels, like, and this dream helps with this fundamental idea. Because we know when someone is good at something, that we won’t  be as good as them if we just copy their movements. A great chef could give you a recipe, but it might never taste the same. Or a musician can show you the chords of his song, but it doesn’t have the same impact. That is because the true act is coming from within the person, and no two people can be identical in that way. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: My longest dream last night, it seemed like I was studying the qualities of Payton Manning – and it didn’t have anything to do with football. It was just like he, and maybe his brother or some other family member, were in my dream.

And, in my dream, they were somebody who had accomplished a lot, and I was studying, and what I was realizing is that when people tried to copy him they weren’t able to accomplish what he was accomplishing because what he was doing was not visible. And what he was doing, in a sense, was a little bit like the video game in that he had these kind of multicolored balls that, if you lined them up and they kind of imploded, they caused a certain effect but you never saw them, you know, it was just something that was done invisibly. And it was a certain alignment, and that alignment caused a certain implosion of energy.

And also, you know, it’s like if you got there earlier he was always going to be there earlier. And other people might try to do what he was doing, but they were copying something on the outer and it wasn’t working because what was making him really good at what he was doing was on the inner.

It was interesting because the dream didn’t have any football in it at all. It was just about the quality of achieving in life, and somebody else who was trying to accomplish that but I was maybe talking to them because what needed to be aligned was on the inner, it wasn’t on the outer which is where other people were focusing. And that dream went on for quite a long time because I was studying what kind of alignment was involved.

John: The detail aspect behind a dream like this has to do with how do you relate in an outer world which is reflective. In other words, the outer reflects the condition of something and then, typically speaking, a person contends with that by trying to cope with that reflection with another reflection – in other words, with an understanding or something.

And, until I had the final dream, I didn’t realize or wasn’t realizing, and I had the final dream in order to correct the fact that because I was coming to kind of a harsh reality, that it’s just reflection upon reflection, and that’s a pretty dire condition to be left in, which means that you just go around and around having to contend with things that affect the heart.

You can get into an emptiness, but not really because then out of that comes some sort of reflection, or relatability, and when you tie into that you then are back to the cycle, the up and down cycle of reflection upon reflection. And we are slowly being directed away from having to be in such a limited way because that is still personal when it’s like that.

In other words, that which isn’t personal comes from a place beyond reflection, it’s a pure light or something. And we aren’t aware of that, so we’re affected by reflection. And when we’re affected by reflection, and we relate to that reflection, then we do something that involves a vying within the heart. In other words, there’s a weight, or burden. There is something that the heart is still trying to sort out, or align, as if it can align or figure out reflections on top of reflections.

And what you were looking at is, you’re aware that there has to be something more than that. There has to be something that goes beyond all of that, that doesn’t stay caught in this mired condition. And so when you were looking at Payton Manning, what you were looking at was this quality where he can get in zone, and in that zone he can see anything, and everything that can happen – and it’s a kind of a knowingness. If he’s paying attention to that, as if he’s trying to act like he’s the one that’s capable of doing this, then he will get back into the realm of reflection.

And so the criticism of Manning is that on the big game he loses something that he is able to carry in the regular season. In other words, he breaks under pressure. For him to break under pressure would mean then that he gets caught in the reflection of things. He gets caught in the thrill of that moment, or something, as opposed to being in the zone.

When that sort of thing happens, when you go into a zone, you affect everything around you, like when Michael Jordan used to go into a zone it would affect the entire team. They would suddenly start getting the rebounds that they weren’t getting. They would suddenly start being in the right place, and he would start being in the right place, and everything would seem to have a synchronicity to it that supported being in the zone. But being in a zone can have a collateral damage effect, in that it can be more than what others are prepared, or capable, or able to handle And when it’s like that, then you get a blowback of a reflection coming from another part that isn’t able to be carried by your presence.

In other words, Manning as the quarterback has to carry the entire team inside of himself in order to make the zone inflection properly work. If you don’t, and something can’t be maintained, or has its doubts or whatever it is that go back into the reflection of things, then it will not work.

For example, at a Sufi conference there was this guy who was going to take people to various levels at a depth that was like a zoning out inside of themselves. And he was going to do it with music. And he explained it ahead of time as to what he was going to do and, initially, just as it was getting exciting, just as I was sensing that he had gone through what I consider introductory stuff and was now getting to the point where he was going to be sending people into a revelry, a person tips over in their chair and almost knocks himself out going over backwards. And that’s when he realized that the reflection, a reflection yet was too much, and that then limited the degree because he couldn’t shoot through that. Once something cracked like that, he wasn’t able to go beyond that. He wasn’t able to take something through that.

So that’s what you were looking at. You were looking at this quality and this trait, and you had a fairly clean, pure view of it.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: A Limited Way

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