Posts Tagged ‘freedom of choice comes with responsibility’


Louise Taylor

When we come to understand the real work involved in making a spiritual journey, we may ask the universe: why? And the answer lies in the fact that we have been given a special gift that no other form of life enjoys: freedom of choice. With such a freedom is great possibility, and great danger (as we see every day). From the universal perspective, we need to prove that we can be trusted to choose on behalf of higher purposes, rather than on behalf of lower desires. Our journey is a process of being surer and surer of the choices we make, and why.  (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So, in the dreaming, it takes a lot of attention to be able to go to a deeper and deeper level inside myself. In other words, this is deep in the dream, and what’s going on is I have the whole sensation of a traveling in which there is two things. There is something that is there and then I have to catch it, and then there’s something that is there and I have to catch it, and I have to catch it, I have to catch it. And when I get up near the top it actually seems to level off a little bit, but still there is the attempt to catch it.

And, like I say, the sensation is like going up, and the direction is like that, within, in terms of the within, in terms of dream imagery. The sense is that of being drawn further and further and, as I said, there is even a leveling out in which it can seem slow at times because I can see myself waver at times. I could see myself look back. I could see myself see my physical condition when I waver; but even though I waver, I still keep going deeper and deeper.

And then eventually I reach a status quo, which is like the top of the in-breath, and what may have been difficult, such as my physical well being as I went deeper and deeper because when I glance back my physical well being may not be very good, I’ve reached a point where everything has stabilized and sound. So I’ve reached the top of an innerness. So there are no conditions, or order, or parts of self to glance back at anymore.

But then, all of a sudden, having gotten there, it switches. Now you start the out-breath, and so now it’s time to come back down into life from this inner depth. And the sensation is quite difficult because you’re doing it differently. Before you had the sensation of being pulled, or guided, or however you’d say, ascending. Now the sensation is different in that I seem to be a beingness that takes the lead, like the ego coming down. And, when I take the lead, it’s like I have to be careful, which means it’s like holding the hand of something on the deeper innerness.

I don’t just come completely down in some sort of helter skelter. So I’m coming back. Like I say, it’s different, it’s like having a hand to hold onto as I descend. And it is like something else is taking the lead – meaning my ego is taking the lead. Something else that was different in the ascent was more like the higher self, and now it’s like something is coming back into life which is more like a quality of ego now.

So when before it’s like being guided and pulled deeper and deeper as an upward sensation, and in coming down it’s different because you could come down in a way that isn’t paying proper attention. So in the coming down you have to be careful that you don’t, as a force of nature, disturb. Or, as I saw in the dream, I could come down and, if I’m not watching my step closely, I can set off a landslide right in front of me. But I am careful, and so if I do set off a landslide I don’t get caught in it. But I look and it could be a close call, but I’m holding the hand of something – so I’m careful.

So by holding onto the hand, of the inner, I see the devastation that my presence in a vibrational energetic is able to set off, in other words, my force of nature development, that is a force of nature because of the innerness that I am able to hold the hand of. But I do not get caught in it because I stay attentive.

In other words, you want to be invisible when you come into the outer. You don’t want to be out there loud and carrying on, and goofy again, because you’re going to get lost again. So the attempt is to proceed with as much care as possible so as to not cause too much, like I say, of the force of nature, and respect my whereabouts, and hereabouts, and thereabouts in terms of this motion back into life.

So I’m having to say that I was there. In other words, you could say that I can look now and can tell that I’m there when breakdowns occur, but I don’t get caught in it, and I was unaffected because I remained attentive to the unfoldment process from within – instead of its affect upon the outer.

The meaning is that I am shown the dynamic of going deeper and deeper with an inner awakening travel sensation, which is a letting go process in which I am taken. The difficulty in that is in the looking back when I should be letting go, there’s like step backs in my physical condition, and those step backs can be seen as in a state of duress because it isn’t accustomed to such a letting go and being taken somewhere deep within, that being what it’s about.

So when I come back into life after having done that, with the out-breath, it’s more consciously because I am coming from such an inner depth. I’m leaving the power and force of this inner depth, so I don’t just blank it out completely, so I watch my step. I’m careful. I have an honoring of that.

So the coming back is something that, when I’m attentive, I know about the inner consciousness, instead of just the outer, and so I know when things are fraught with danger, in terms of the outer, because everything’s changeable, can be affected.

So it is in coming back, if I am not in the proper frame of reference, in terms of the inner beingness from above, that is in the coming back kind of a type of guidance, or a type of knowingness, I will be a force in nature, a force in nature that can be harmful to myself. I may be a force of nature, anyway, whether I like it or not. I may set off landslides as it is.

So the ego can act as if this is okay, if it’s just irresponsible. And the ego, as far as the ego side of things goes, can just flick off such an effect, and the ego aspect of one’s self that one doesn’t buy into, and isn’t lost in, can let go, can step back at the right moment in time and save itself from over indulgence thanks to the hand of an inner guidance that it is able to adhere to.

So why did I have this dream? I had this dream to reach a recognition of inner into outer responsibility. It appears in this dream I am able to see and respect what there is in the outer and, therefore, have a handle on what could be, as long as I realize where I am, how I am, who is guiding me, and I follow what is necessary to tell that story, energetically, if nothing else.

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dungeonCertain dream images really show how our unconscious is trying to communicate with us. And, if we remember that we are all the characters in our dreams, we can see the profoundness, in this example, of one person (character) being a free spirit, and the rest of the family being held against their will – with the added intensity that any attempt to rescue the family could set off an explosive. Yes, as we’ve noted, this life we live is a high stakes game, and many things vie for our attention. A human being must use its consciousness and freedom of choice to defend itself from being abducted by meaningless things. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: So this is another long dream, and in it I’m a young adolescent girl living in a small town. And it feels like when I first arrive in the town I’m at this train station-type complex where there’s a man that kind of fascinates me, that’s probably in his 20s. And because he kind of flows in a way where he has that kind of energy that you’ve talked about.

He goes into some shop and they let him earn some extra money by suddenly arranging some of the goods that have arrived, and then he also has something to do with some stuffed animal that looks like a little ostrich or something that intrigues me. So he’s kind of this free spirit, and I like that, you know, and I’m young enough to be impressed by that.

And then we go into town, and it must be a holiday, and I don’t see him right then. I’m going to my family house where we’re kind of gathering together gifts and things for the holiday. And then when we go further into town, it feels like there’s a man there that suddenly captured members of my family, and other people in town, and he’s taken them away and has them hidden somewhere. And you feel like he’s even going to blow them up.

I know at this point in the dream I kind of go through a dark tunnel. I seem to be in a room where I hear his plans for them, and he’s a very wealthy man but he’s kind of abusing people around him by capturing them. And some of us get freed, but nobody knows where certain of the people are, including I think some men in my family as well as other people.

And I had overheard, because I have been in this dark cave or something when he came by, the guy that captured everybody, I’d overheard that he was actually planning on locking them up in maybe an old jail that wasn’t used much. And then if people figured out where they were, and came to rescue them, it was booby trapped so it would blow up.

I haven’t told anybody this just yet because again I’m kind of young and I’m not sure other people listen to me. I’ve gone home, and the house is just a mess. It’s like people have unwrapped things, and they’ve left papers and things that are okay all mixed up on the floor with garbage, and dishes that are dirty. So I’m going around the room and I’m picking it up, and sorting it out, and trying to clean things and put them in the right order. But in the back of my mind, too, I realize that everybody is still looking for but hasn’t found the rest of the family members.

I get to a point where what I’ve sorted out and cleaned up is in pretty good shape, and I had told one person that was older what I had heard about where they were, but now I tell another person that I’m pretty sure they’re in the jail and that it’s booby trapped. But I’m still not hearing anything about them, so I don’t know if because I’m young no one’s listened to me, or they don’t believe me or what’s happening, and I’m still concerned about them.

So I go down to where the old jail is, and there I see that there are a number of people engaged in a rescue operation. And they’re doing it in such a way that the family members and everyone else doesn’t get blown up. And there’s an even younger girl than I am that I relate to, that appears at the window of the jail, and she crawls down on the ladder to be with me. So then I know everybody’s going to be okay.

But at the same time, as I’m leaving the area, it feels like I glance at a paper and I see the man that locked everybody up, or captured everybody, that’s supposedly the bad guy, just had his best year ever in terms of how his investments are paying off. So it seems like nothing really happened to him. Then the dream goes on from there, but it shifts markedly.

John: I think we’ve reached the phase of dreaming where we’re gathering information that has a little bit to do with our makeup, as it correlates to conditions of our soul from a prior lifetime. In other words, you have the information that’s given, that you have this free-floating nature, of which things just kind of work out, and that’s contrasted against parts of yourself that are restrained, and that any efforts to free them up is apt to cause a calamity.

And if you do get a break, and something does come through, it’s as if the forces that had been holding you back, there’s no recourse to what they have done. In other words, they seem to somehow or another gain some sort of overall benefit in life from having refrained, or restrained, something.

This sort of thing has set a tone in your nature, that I had been looking at and wondering about. You’ve never described it before, but I’ve been looking at this from the standpoint that when something gets to a particular point you have a way of checking out from it, almost undermining it by not wanting to jinx it, or something.

It’s really kind of a funny thing to think of, and so I keep sitting and I look at the karma of that. What is the karma of that? Because it’s got this strange skewered effect, you know, it’s really hard to sort out because you have the great free-flow that helps, and facilitates, and makes things occur kind of naturally, and then that’s contrasted by this quality that has this huge remiss in it, that it refuses to allow itself to believe something as if to believe something will create a kind of dire consequence.

And so there’s a hidden kind of holding back that is shaped as a consequence of some quality that is kind of explained by what you just described, where there are the parts of yourself that are jinxed, or booby trapped, that are restrained. And, if they do get free, it’s almost like a mockery, too, because that which took them prisoner, or captive of that, has gained some sort of huge vicarious benefit in some way.

In shamanism there is this image in which the life force itself is afflicted by what is like a blob-like energy, that tends to feed or eat off of the aliveness, and that you have to become more alive, and more awake, or otherwise it keeps you dumbed down.

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analog-dualityThis simple dream opens up a huge territory, and really takes us into the heart of what it means to commit ourselves to being in service to something greater than ourselves, i.e., the purposes of creation. And it also shows the power of freedom of choice, because in every moment we can say “no” to creation and “yes” to our personal wants and needs. This shows the depth of what it takes – a constant choosing – to keep our feet on the spiritual path – in fact, that act of constant choosing is the path itself. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: So in this next dream it’s like I’m working. I’m working somewhere like a welfare office that offers services to people of some form that they come for. There’s a major reorganization going on. And you feel like when they come down and announce this reorganization like maybe they’ve gotten rid of some of the top management even, because they want things done different to serve better – but they’re pleased with the work I’m doing. However, what I didn’t expect is they’re changing our hours, so instead of working like, let’s say, 8:00am to 5:00pm or something, we’re going to be working 10:00am to 7:00pm.

And there’s something about this, like this change in hours which means that it’s going to limit life in a little bit that you don’t go into work until 10:00am. And that makes me wonder if maybe I should go back home and be living with Dad again, because it just wasn’t quite a change that I expected. And it feels like when you work those hours you’re not going to have much of your own personal life. Anyway, that’s all.

John: That’s an interesting dilemma that everyone faces. You see this all the time, in that a person will take and maybe they’ll do something that could be considered meritorious, a breakthrough. Then there’s the idea that now they’re entitled to a reprieve, or a stepping back more into the personal.

And what happens is they’re not understanding, and it’s hard to understand this because this is not something that is mental, or something that’s logical or rational, but as you open up or are affected by conscious energy in a particular way, it’s easier to be unconscious than it is to be conscious, and so something is invigorated or pressed that rises to the fore. It’s easy, then, to think almost like you’ve done your dues or something like that, and so then you tend to step back so that you don’t have to quite be at the same acuity that’s been quickened.

And when you do that you’re trying to make personal choices, which you now feel that you’re entitled to do, or entitled to make. And everyone does it. But the danger is, is the degree to which it veils the responsibility of the clarity of understanding that has opened up when you had the conscious effect or push occur in your life.

And so, again, this is back to the theming of the contrast. Whenever something is put in your face, as a possibility or potentiality, the way you learn is you recognize how that is important as an aspect of your beingness, that you make time for, or turn your attention towards, as something that is needing to unfold, that unfolds in relationship to you understanding yourself as part of a greater whole.

So you’re presented with something like that, and then, at the same time, you always have the other option of making personal choices and choices that have to do with your idea of responsibility that kind of correspond with old patterns and mannerisms of your nature. And the reason it’s presented like that is so that you sort the two out, so that you really do make a decision, you make a choice, that’s in cohesion with what is naturally unfolding inside. But you’re always given the option and the choice.

So your dreams, you did this three different times where you took and you looked at first one side and then another, and one side and the other, and the other side you can look at can be 180-degree polarity. It could be something that you don’t even really agree with necessarily, but if you don’t look at it and you don’t recognize and put it into its proper balance and place, then nothing can happen in either direction.

The reason why it’s like this is because one direction or the other has problems. You have to include both directions. In other words, those who aspire just to become say saints and take and go into this way of being that annihilates all kinds of things that are awkward or hard in the world because they hold onto a particular mannerism that is steering themselves in a particular way – they can’t go very far, either. They can go and go and go in one particular direction, but they’re going to be hit with all kinds of mayhem and confusion in the outer, that will constantly harass and bother them, and they will actually start to look kind of sickly if they keep maintaining the one direction only as if that is the end all, be all. You have to include the polarity of things because you are in the outer, and you do have to deal with how things are all jumbled in the physical. You can’t just reject that.

And so when you take and you have a connection inside, that’s an inner connection – it’s not really talked about that much in Sufism, but you have the corresponding opposite side, too. It’s almost like things have a one-to-one correspondence, a certain trust in one direction requires a certain back step or something, or so it appears, into creation, so you can’t take and run out a schematic in one particular direction to the denial of the other.

It’s true of however you approach life. I mean, you see these various schematics from the standpoint where you would see someone who’s big in meditation and in the saintly quality, and you realize that they’re basket cases in terms of function in the outer. And then you can look at another person who’s extremely successful in the outer, but has no inner recognition of value because he’s caught up completely in the outer.

Are they really that different? If the two could come together as an integrated component you would really have something as a balanced individual, but the one that’s all caught up in power and control and very, very good at what they do on the outer and very successful in the outer, is kind of the other side of the coin from the person that’s the saintly trait that has completely let go of things but would be a basket case and would be a peculiarity in terms of the outer.

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