Access to the Will

99334uThere is no end to the development possibility of a human being. At every new level reached, more becomes possible for the individual life, and more becomes  possible for the service that that life can provide to the universe. We speak about connection, yes, it all begins with connection to higher energies. But with those higher energies comes higher intelligence, and a need, and an ability, to respond to that higher intelligence. At every level is a new beginning – as we align our life closer and closer to the ways of the universe itself. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: All I really remember of my dreams is, it felt like I was trying to get a certain alignment to happen. And the alignment… something would begin moving through my body from right to left, and I couldn’t seem to get the shift, or the alignment to happen.

I finally figured out that maybe I was sleeping on the wrong side of the bed for the alignment. I mean, that’s the best I could come up with. I think I even asked you if I was on the right side of the bed or not.

It just had to move through in a certain way, and things had to be lined up in a certain way, and I couldn’t seem to get it. And so it’s almost like that frustration drove out any other thoughts I had, or any other dreams. It was like I just couldn’t get that alignment to happen. I was so frustrated.

John: What you were trying to comprehend as a sensation is how something comes in, as an access, and that access that comes in, to put a word on it, is called the Will – with a capital W.

And you’re not the Will, but you have access to the Will. And, if you’re able to reach that, everything else drops away. In fact, if this Will is viewed in an outer context you can look to be kind of reckless because the access to something like this is all there is for a human being to catch up with.

If there’s such a thing as consciousness, it’s the access to the Will that is the consciousness. And that when one meditates, or does whatever that they do, if there’s an alignment and such that you want to use as a word, that is all about being in a place in which what can flow through you, can flow through you, without there being any fear or any reaction. Fears, reactions, things that affect the heart are stop points, or end points, that occur in terms of something unfolding.

The sweeping from right to left is interesting. I’ve never experienced it from right to left. I’ve experienced it from left to right. It’s a quality, it’s a spirit energy quality, that one can easily push away but, within that, is an access. And so if there’s even such a thing as a training, the training is this access. The more you let go to this the more you appear to be trained in some capacity, but you’re not really trained, your just able to follow the access to the Will of what is in the overall. And the overall is just a vibration, and your access to that is an access to an inner vibration.

And, therefore, that’s why even in outer appearances you can be quite peculiar to a person who is observing something like this in an outer way because you’re not going to make sense of it, except in some sort of relative fashion. You’re not going to make sense of this because it is not something that is tangible, in a way, to the senses that is absolute. It can only be tangible to the senses in a relative way.

It can be experienced in an absolute way, however, but the senses of one’s reactions or fears, the way they take something upon themselves, gets in the way. So it is really an amazing state of being, so you kind of had a glimpse of something that’s very peculiar, in that regard, in that if it would have fully made itself known it can kind of drive you a bit crazy because, as you come to recognize or to see this, you’re going to have your reactions. You’re going to have to put veils on that because, following the access of something coming in, and to, and through you, is a kind of quality that to the mind would have to be seen as, if the mind has to see it that is, it can’t because to the mind it’s magic, you know because to the mind it doesn’t follow any ordered principle.And yet this is the ordering of all of the principles of everything that there is because it’s the essence of the inner, and its full aliveness.

So you catch up to it in bits and pieces – the spirit energy of things – it’s kind of an interesting way of just being situated in life so that what occurs dances around inside of you as a language. It has its own language, has its own knowingness, but it’s an access. It’s not the Will itself, but that access can be such an access that it’s pretty hard to tell the difference between what is an access and what is the Will.

So this is how inner and outer come together. The access comes in as an inner, and the Will has to do with what is created. And so the access and the Will can come very, very, very close to each other and, I suspect that ultimately yes, I suppose that there is a coming together that is a oneness between the two – and that’s an absoluteness, then, because then it’s an aliveness of everything that there is.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: Access to the Will

The Flip Side

Becca Barbanall

It has been said that we live in a topsy-turvy world, i.e., we put all our focus on the things that don’t really matter and we ignore everything that truly matters – according to the purposes of the universe. Well, as we develop, we begin to get glimpses of this other side, the side that is connected to universal purposes rather than locked in to personal illusions. This dream portrays such moments, by showing the flipping upside down of rooms in a castle – which is a greatly expanded place, and state, to live in. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: So, in my dream, I’m in it feels like almost a large house. It’s kind of reminds me of old castles or something, but anyway I’m in the house. I’m more of an observer in this dream, and suddenly everything in the room just flips, like if it did a flip upside down and righted itself again.

And then I realized I’ve dreamt this before and that this is some kind of a contest going on. And so with a person in the room they were making everything flip, and maybe whoever flips best wins the contest. But I’m trying to figure out, because I know I’ve dreamt this before, I’m asking someone because I can’t remember, did the person and someone make everything flip?

And what I’m trying to figure out is whether when the person flips, what’s going on? Do they flip the whole building, or do they just flip a room in a building? Logic would tell me they just flip a room in a building, but I don’t really know. And I can’t remember from my past dreams. It’s got me so curious and I seem to be asking the person next to me, and am trying to figure this one out because I want to know how the flip happens.

John: The subject that one’s working with, the underlying subject that one’s working with, has to do with how the heart contends with everything in its surroundings. And so a heart that’s in a very, very limited surrounding generally doesn’t have much of a chance, because then it is staring at just what is densely hitting it in the face.

But you’re in a surrounding in which something has opened up in a greater dynamic way. In other words, you’re in a castle setting, so that you don’t have the usual defined conformities that keep you from being able to function, or resonate out.

In terms of the theme of the dreaming, because everything vies for the heart, you are coming to recognize that, in an in-between world, you’re going to have things that hurt and affect the heart, that are reflective in the outer, and then you’re going to have the aspiring part inside of you that tries to reach beyond all of that.

And, ordinarily, you cannot do that except in momentary instances when you totally surrender, or let go, and are able to find an acceptance in which you can function outside of the ordinary, imposed, status quo. The ordinary imposed status quo is a condition of consciousness in which you experience everything, you take into account everything, which means you are also taking in the direness of things, that too is coming into the heart; the stiffness, the awkwardness.

And so, when it’s like that, and you’re taking that in, then you’re limited. Only this dream is there to point out, and to talk about, the periods of time when you are able to escape such bondage, in other words, where you are able to rise above the typical human condition in which things are more or less held collectively in check – in terms of the human condition – by the fact that you’re taking in limitations, in the heart, as well as a higher quality way of beingness.

So, in order for you to get to a state in which this higher quality of beingness is able to move around, well it’s generally said that the soul moves around when you’re sleeping, it is not as confined by the throes of the outer, where the senses, and the mind, and the ego and all of that are going at it. In other words, the prisoner is not in such a castle anymore, supposedly.

Well, in the outer you can also get to a point where you have an openness in which the heart is free to where it doesn’t carry the anguish of outer afflictions that are noticeable in an environment that are all pervasive in a reflective outer environment. And so, when you don’t have that, you can find yourself flipping for a split moment in a way that exuberantly, inflectively, often times joyously, at other points in time it’s just a counterclockwise or something that catches everything by surprise. You can do this something that breaks the usual bondage, which is like the flipping, which is where you cause something to just flip.

So one’s been playing with this. It’s to be able to function in a wide open way, in a fairly continuous way, because one does not draw a form of attention in such a way that causes things to be questioned, or challenged, or have to be sorted out in terms of the reflective. The reflective can just accept it.

Because a human being has its limitations, you tend to get what’s called flip moments where something flips and usually they’re intervals, they’re intermittent, they’re not constant. And then the parameters of outer conditioning reimpose themselves.

And that’s why it is very, very, very difficult. You’ll notice that you don’t have a teacher come out and just go point blank bang, bang, boom, boom, hitting everybody in the jaw, straightaway, because that would be hitting the reflective, and then would cause a reaction that would rise up and tear away at this flip side state of overall beingness in an essence.

In other words, everything would struggle defensively. So what the teacher has to do, and this is the object lesson of how we’re dreaming and having to look at this, is that you have to find the way in which it is possible to touch things without causing trace elements of reaction.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: The Flip Side

The Light Bulb Moment

Today we continue the conversation we began yesterday between Ann and John (see Jumping to the Inner). (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So, you’ve dreamt in the classic sense, and this is a sense that I talk to this one teacher about. I did this on a trip I took with him and, his wife had shared a dream with me.

In fact, I commanded her to do it basically. I said, “Well, tell me the dream.” She later told me I scared her when I said it like that. It scared her to have to tell me the dream, and of course her husband was sitting right there too and, so in portraying this dream I actually then went to what I considered a fourth element in the dream.

What I said then and what I described at that point in time is not something that even he could follow, and so she couldn’t even follow it. In other words, I think to understand this stuff you have to have that ticking or correlating in your nature already to know it.

And so after I had done that… in other words she followed it up to one, two, three we’ll say, and I even tried to describe how it had this musical note to it, because the Chisti’s hear things in a musical way, and I can see how to apply the musical way to help facilitate how to hear it, to understand it, but then when I went to the fourth, I know I left her behind…

And so she turned to him and she asked him and his response was, “I don’t experience that.” That’s all he can say, “I don’t experience that,” something to that effect. Which had me almost doing a double take as if, am I imagining this or something? Is this something that I’m on some tangent on? But no, it doesn’t happen very often, but when that fourth comes in you get brand new information about life.

And I guess you can say that that’s a sight level too, or a mystic’s level. The new information you get about life also incorporates and pulls together, though, the alchemical level, because it is something then that’s not only new information about life, but as you hold it, you shift it into life too. It’s that powerful.

In other words, what I notice about hitting that, is that it may not be obvious at that moment in time, but your life changes slightly. That fourth thing causes something to change in the way you live, the way you now perceive a little bit, on a living regular way.

So you’ve done the first three, and rarely do you get to the fourth. The Chisti teacher never experienced the fourth. And yet, he experienced a heck of a lot. It’s like once I raised a question with him about something, and the next morning before he starts the meditation he turns to me and he says, “Last night I went into your dream.”

And then he says, “It’s definitely organic.” In other words, the issue that was raised had to do with the way something is to unfold, and he had shared with me the day before that he can actually see how certain things need to be, and so the point that I was making, if you can see it why not do it that way, as opposed to kind of allowing something to fumble about entrusting in the cosmic or something, or the great Whole, and watching that.

And I raised that as a question for him. That’s a big Rubik’s Cube question. And so he came back and his answer was basically: You have to trust in the greater principle of the Whole. The answer being, it’s definitely organic. He can pick that sort of thing out without going and having the fourth…

And the other thing he can do is… and I told him when he did it I thought it was an abuse, because, although I had seen this I don’t know that I can regularly act on it, and he has told me he doesn’t regularly act on it either.

When I was in high school I had moments where I could see the closing prices of the various months of the wheat futures market, before the paper came out to show me what they were and, of course, in those days, I had no idea what the market was doing until I got the paper because I was out in the country and away from it all.

It had already happened however at the time that I dreamt it. I just didn’t know. I mean I’d never heard no radio broadcast or anything which would have contaminated my impression. I was just picking up on it vibrationally.

Well, he had a dilemma in his life in which he got caught in this Madoff scandal, and lost a lot of money. And so he was really worried about being able to do what he needed to do, in terms of his calling, and his duty. He suddenly saw, one day, the price that a stock was going to go to in terms of coming down, and so he bought accordingly, and was shown at what number to sell it. And that got him out of a certain point of destitution, because he was hit that hard.

Now he knows that that was a kind of a one-time thing, and he can’t be relying upon that, but he has that kind of a closeness with inside of himself that can tune in to something. He also shared with me earlier, that when he was still taking people on adventures, trips, and such, and one of them was to India and they were going over to see, what at that time in terms of his understanding, was the most conscious or holiest woman alive.

And she was sick and she was dying, in other words her time was up. Before he got there he had the sensation that she had passed, but he didn’t have enough of an intuitive connection at that point in time to know if it was for sure or not. He says, “Now I would know, but at that time I didn’t.” He has that kind of listening center – that’s pretty impressive, where he gets the information.

Teachers like that, if they work on that level, like in our path, they can communicate that at night. He communicates it, but in a different motif. He communicates it and uses features like sound to help. The path we’re on uses features like light to communicate it.

That is why you’re drawn to this path, is because as your dream indicated, there’s your aha moment; you suddenly get the flash.

I can appreciate both because when I sit and meditate and go into a stillness and a quietness, I incorporate a lot of what I learned from this Chisti teacher. And I’m at a point where I don’t have the emotional, or something, content anymore, that I used to have, that I used to feel was important, that touched the heart in a certain way. Now, in many instances, it’s just kind of there and can even be a little bit bland.

When it’s not there, is when things are disconcerting. And last night what I dreamt was what it’s like when you’re not there. So now I am deviating off of your dreams.

And what I experienced last night was, I came out of meditation in extreme physical pain, and while I was somewhere else I factored that extreme physical pain into the dream. I’ve done this sort of thing before, but not with the awareness developed this time. I have done it with stomach acid, hurt back, or some goofy thing or another…

And it would keep me from traveling in a certain way because I would have to be attentive to my malingering dilemma, and so I would have that waft into the dream in some sort of hypnotic way or something. In this particular case what happened is this excruciating pain showed that I was not in the space of a wholeness.

And because I wasn’t in a space of the wholeness, I was at a point that could experience all of the lesser elements of confusion, pain, sorrow, disorientation, out of balance, all of that kind of stuff that happens when you are attentive to something in the outer, as opposed to the inner. And so what was unique about last night is I got to see this almost as if from the soul’s perspective.

In other words, the soul is factoring this in and so I had this delusional kind of dream in relationship to the pain factored into the dream to show that I’m out of place, and out of sync, and out of balance. But what I saw from the soul perspective is it may have that thrown in its face, but it can’t relate to something trite like that. It still upholds that as part of the memo of the overall.

It’s not part of the memo of the overall, but the soul has to assume that it must be, because it only sees the overall. That was something I had never noticed before.

The soul never departs from the profoundness because it never, you know, this other stuff – it’s not that, it never was that. It has no relationship with that. And the fact that I might have a pain or a physical ailment or whatnot, that’s a reflective thing.

So that was meditation dream, and then from the meditation dream I went into countless examples.

Now, the thing that helped to trigger this was I had a good close friend in Denver who is moving to Florida, and I think he identified the property through Googling, and stuff like that. I think his energy souped up to it and I don’t know what it was, but I think he talked himself more into it than actually taking and giving it some time to feel by going there and so on.

He was going to close on it I think Tuesday. It’s probably too late to stop. Well, I finally had time the other day to go on Google Earth and whatnot, and there’s a means now where you can take and use this little man and put yourself right in the middle of the street, and it’s like you’re standing there and you see everything. In other words you can Google it from above, like from outer space, but then you can do this and it’s just like you’re standing there with a camera.

It’s like you are looking at it with your own eyes and then you can just look around you. You can move this little man around too all in co-relationship to the street of course. You can’t go on the other side of the house.

This was enough for me to pick up the sensation of the area. Because I know this guy, I can see that what he’s doing has an outer quality that he’s reaching for, but it’s a total inner miss vibrationally, and he’s going to get very sad, and it’s just not going to have the aliveness for him.

Because he had something inside of him that is quickened in terms of an inner aliveness, but he seems to have to live in the perdition of the outer confusion, and he doesn’t know how to stay or listen to this inner aliveness as the beacon to everything that there is. It’s not like he doesn’t understand it, he just can’t do it.

I mean, he’s pretty conscious intellectually, but he just can’t do it, and if I’m talking to him he can understand it, but that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t go and still have these outer reverberations. And so it took and it left me drilling down on that scenario.

And then from the meditation dream, I could see the confusion that exists in terms of the orientation to the outer, in terms of what he’s trying to pull together versus the inner quality. I mean, in his way he made his checklist by looking here and looking here and looking there and looking there, but he’s still acting on the basis of an outer motif.

He’s not going to be finding that light bulb moment. He may get some little inflection to the degree that there are things in the outer that are not completely dead, maybe only 95% dead, that can give you a little excitement. And then you spark off of that and then all of a sudden you open your eyes and other than that 5% the other 95% doesn’t touch you at all, it’s dead. It’s dormant. It’s stale. It’s dull.

I don’t even know that I can tell him this, because if I successfully tell him this, which I figure is 50/50 I can, he’s going to crack, he’s going to collapse, because we do so much that we can’t help ourselves, we just do it.

And then when we do it we have to suck it up and make the best of it, and if somebody comes along and rubs our nose in it, you’re either going to get mad, fighting mad, to hold your space, but that isn’t his nature. If he gets it, his heart’s going to drop to the floor. He’s going to be crushed. And he’s the type, because he has a softer correlation than most masculines do to the feminine side of himself, he’s going to be a little bit of a danger to himself in his despair.

You don’t often see that in a masculine energy, but he has that, and so his defense mechanism is to lie to himself a little bit, and cover it up. But the problem is, he has experienced this inner, so he can’t quite totally get away with it. And it’s probably good that he only goes so far, because at some particular point it haunts you if you don’t adhere to it.

Your dreams are going first, second, and third. You’re getting the light bulb moment. That’s all very exciting. It’s still a process. What you’re doing is still on the level of inner teaching. And that’s very exciting. There isn’t a whole lot of grief in that, to where you’re missing a responsibility or something. You don’t know, and you’re being shown.

I mean, how can you pick at that? But what if there was another element, where you could slip backwards to what was just pointed out to you, and beat yourself up, and say, Jesus, how ridiculous, these checklists I’m doing. How silly. And what if you can really feel the pain of the stupidity of that, that that was a wayward way of doing it?

But in your dream enfoldment, that’s okay. Because that step needed to be there in order for you to be able to get the next phase.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: The Light Bulb Moment