An Energetic Progression

enegeticsThis dream followed Jeane’s first dream, described yesterday in Knowing How To Wait. The imagery has changed and she finds herself needing chemotherapy treatments following by a steam bath. This idea may seem unsettling to the dreamer, but in this case it is about resolving a problem, a matter of habits and patterns, that allows for a higher octave of consciousness to be reached. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: Then I had a dream in which I have a friend who has found out she has to go get chemotherapy, and the way she will have to do it is you go get the chemotherapy and then you like go and spend some time in a steam room, and you have to do it every day right in the beginning.

And she has to go from one town that’s about 40 miles away, to the other town to do this, so I have offered to give her a ride every day for that. When I take her there, I suddenly discover that I have to get the same chemotherapy, so she gets her treatment, and I get mine, and then we go and we do the steam room and we sit in the steam room.

And then it seems like we go out into the forest for a while. Then comes the second day when I go down and I get the treatment, and I go to the steam room, and then I realize that for some reason I forgot to give her a ride. It’s almost like I thought she was already with me.

So now I realize I’m going to have to go pick her up for the third day. Actually, I go back up there that day to bring her down, because I can’t figure out how it was I forgot to pick her up. It was confusing to me. It’s like I thought she was with me, and she wasn’t because I’d forgotten, and so I go back and I get her, wondering if she will have gotten there on her own, or do I go get her?

It’s a little confusing because at that point the dream shifts, and I’m back in the forest where we would sit after we had done our steam bath, and I’m talking to a guy from my high school about a change he’s making in his life, and he’s a little annoyed because a change is actually going to cause him to sell off a property he didn’t really want to sell off.

And I even feel he should keep it, but I realize that from the irritation in his voice, it might be an issue where he can’t quite afford to make both choices, so to support the choice he’s made, he’s going to have to sell off this vacation property even if he doesn’t sell it off 100%, so I don’t think he should. I realize I have to be kind of gentle or careful how I bring it up so he doesn’t feel badly about it.

Then it feels like all of us are at a restaurant and I go up to the counter to select what I want for dinner, and they serve different kinds of fish that they fix in kind of an exotic way, and also you can go across that restaurant. I do it on my own, and there’s a resort there that if you go into the basement, and they have like several tiled rooms, and then they have a steam room, and treatment room.

And it feels like when I first look at it, because we’re having dinner, it’s like after hours but I know where it is, and then I have gone back to the restaurant and I have selected the fish I want. But suddenly it feels like I feel like I really need to go back over and get one of those treatments even if the spa is closed. I can still go down to the basement and figure out if I can still do a steam treatment.

So I go over there because it’s kind of deserted, and I know I go into one tiled room that’s bare and then I want to go from there and find my way to wherever they do the steam rooms, but that’s when I wake up.

John: This dream actually builds on the other dream in that you start off where your nature is such that it has to go through a particular issue, or dilemma, in terms of how you have to relate to things, and then you have to give yourself some time and some space.

The steam room is like the relief from it. In other words, you make a decision, and you do something, and then after you make the decision, in order to give yourself some space, you have to go to the steam room, and then you have to change the atmosphere, and maybe take a walk in the woods. And you have come to recognize that this works well for you as a pattern, so you have this pattern, this energetic pattern in life, that whenever you make a decision you then have to do something that enables you to settle back and relax.

It’s like reading, like you do, does that. Then you have to take a walk or do something again to stimulate energy in another way, and all of it then causes things to be able to shift, and adjust, and equalize, or normalize so that you don’t get too intensely caught up in the decision, or the manner in which you have decided to do something.

So what your dream has done, is it’s taken and it’s shown that the timing, the idea of working with time, has other qualities to it and one of the qualities is the steam room, and then the walk in the forest, and whatnot, all to help to ameliorate the intense decision that you have done that you feel is important for your well being, the cancer treatment, to resolve a problem.

Then you suddenly realize that this is a pattern that you are doing, over and over again, and it’s like the pattern is creating a problem because you need to shift. You need to figure out how to take and carry it to the next level. How do you let go of this?

And so that’s your dilemma. So in between this letting go shows itself in terms of you still having the habit, more as a reflective thing, but you’re no longer doing it cohesively with the other person. That denotes where it’s starting to shift.

And then how does it shift? Well, it shifts to a higher octave, a different energetic. Instead of the routine, and the pattern, it’s shifting to something in which there is a change in the consciousness, and fish represent consciousness, and so you find yourself now going into a place where you can have a meal with fish, where you have now changed the environment, you’ve changed the scenario, and you can take in a greater consciousness.

And with that greater consciousness, you realize that the way that you can soothe and relax yourself, and settle yourself out, in this kind of peculiar twist on time, is that there is a sauna in this place. But now as another element of time, you know that it’s there, you know that it’s part of this consciousness, but it hasn’t yet opened up for you.

So you actually have traveled quite a bit in the one dream. A way of saying it now is, you started off having to deal with something that had a responsibility, and a type of aggravation, and even a type of ill effect upon your nature that you were committed to doing, and as part of doing that, and making it all work, you had other things that you had substituted in, your ability to take the sauna and then go into the woods, and all of that pattern, made it all workable.

And what you do in the outer is, you can read your book, and then you can go to your exercise class or some other thing, or take a walk, or go to a movie or something, and all of that then kind of normalizes everything.

So the thing that I have to wonder in terms of what is the outer event, if I was to point to and wonder, what is the outer event that has a cancerous effect of a commitment to it, as part of a pattern, what is the outer event that you’re contending with, that you then have to equalize and normalize?

It makes me wonder, is doing the dream work, and doing all of that, that you then relax away from by reading, and then taking walks, and doing a workout group, or going to movies, is that part of it? Well, if it is, that’s okay because what’s interesting is it shows that there is a shift coming, and the shift coming is that this whole process that you do, that you find yourself doing, is shifting to a greater consciousness, and in that greater consciousness then the means by which you stroke yourself, or feel yourself, like the process of reading we’ll say, is something like that. It takes on a different quality of meaningfulness.

In other words, all of that other led to, and was important to, leading to a shift in which you now transition into a greater consciousness in which in this greater consciousness, it too has its octave of the steam room, or the mode of relaxation, but in this greater consciousness you have to wait to see how that is going to open up and work because it’s currently not open – only you know that it’s available too.

This is a dream denoting how your energy is shifting.

Your first dream, the first aspect toward the understanding of this, is how do you bring something through in relationship to an overall collective, and that you have a focus that’s going to persevere it through. And it will, because as you hold to the focus, you keep the creative element going, and you have an alignment as such that you have more power with your focus than you did before because you’re not as thrown around, or caught up in the collective of things, and so over the course of time you’re going to be able to bring this about.

You might say that, over the course of time, you could say that the dream work and stuff that we do is like that, and then with that has come certain patterns and habits, and those patterns and habits have been important to lead to a point where it now shifts to another level of consciousness, of which, in that level of consciousness, is its own pause for relief. In other words, it’s a shift, to a shift, to a shift.

The first dream is like a shift showing that you can work with, and go through, and wait, to the point with your focus and attention, to where something is shaped and shifted, and you can get that consciousness to work through.

And in your second dream, you’re showing that with that comes mannerisms and habits and patterns, in terms of what you have been able to cause to shift and shape through, and those mannerisms and patterns and habits then, at some particular point you’re able to shift from them to yet a greater consciousness that then has its level of relief.

It’s showing a progress, an energetic progression, as a type of journeying that you’re doing as you’re growing.

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A Very Deep Dream

Spiritual journey’s are often triggered by a sense of longing that can never be quenched by anything we can obtain in the outer, material world. Here, Jeane’s dreams involve a feeling of sadness, where a person on the journey can sense the nearness of a deeper connection, yet can’t quite hold onto it. That causes a sadness over the loss of what has been briefly glimpsed, yet has slipped away again. It points to the idea that we can evolve forward only when we are ready, and each step of the way our fitness is tested. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: The initial part of the night I seem to be having this dream where I was kind of repeating an action. And the action was that there was a Scandinavian play, or part of a play. It had a particular name to it that I never did pull out awake.

I must have wanted to absorb it because what I’d do is I would back up to the edge of the bed, or wherever the play was going on, and I would put my back up against it until I’d absorbed that part of the play. So wherever it was going on, that’s the side I would back up to, until I kind of absorbed it.

And I would do that again and again and again. And that particular part of the play seemed to have a name, and it was Scandinavian, and it was masculine, and that’s about all I could say about that part of the dreaming because it just kept repeating that way.

John: The theme of the dreaming last night had to do with some sort of waiting or apprehension that exists. And it’s hard to just stop and wait and try to let something kind of unfold, noting that something is missing.

And it’s missing in that it doesn’t mean that it’s gone for good, it’s just that it hasn’t quite come into the equation, or back into the equation. That’s how I would dream it, in a literal sense. The way you dream it is, in terms of how something is a little out of the ordinary. You attempt to touch and absorb, touch and absorb, touch and absorb and that’s how you denote the apprehension.

In other words, in the overall you’re feeling apprehension, and because of how your higher self sees yourself, you realize that the way you deal with that is you have to take it in. You have to absorb it. You have to somehow or another process that through yourself.

And it’s not flowing very well because you’re kind of having to contend with this new sense of awareness about you, in this particular way that is. And so all you can do is try to touch it and absorb it, back up and touch it again and absorb it.

In other words, work at it bit by bit. It’s like an aspect of something that’s unfolding and in order for everything to be okay you just have to go through this process of taking it in and absolving it, so that your equanimity, your balance, how it is that you’re able to contend or carry or be in the Whole, is balanced.

Jeane: In this next dream, I’m living in a house with three levels. On the top level, in this little room that was very white and clean, and had nice windows in it, and two beds, was where I was with my ex.

And I’ve separated from him, and I’m living kind of on the middle level. And on the ground and middle levels, there are other people that live there and a whole bunch of activity that goes on, even a little café or something.

John: So, you’re living on the third level or the…?

Jeane: No, I’m living on the middle level.

John: And on the middle level there’s all this other going on too.

Jeane: Yes.

John: As well as on the first level.

Jeane: Yes. I’ve been down there a certain amount of time. I think I’ve been doing more of that absorbing. I seem to remember some of that going on there, too, where I was trying to absorb that again.

And then at some point I go back up to the room that we had shared, and a woman friend of mine and then a masculine figure I don’t see clearly, go up with me and they’re all going to guide me through a breathing session, which will help me clear. Well, I lie down and start breathing; I’m trying to get into it.

My ex leaves the room because I guess he’s diabetic or something and he has to go get an injection, and then the other two people start smoking. Well, I’m trying to do something where I am really clearing myself with breathing right and they’re smoking, so obviously this isn’t working too well.

I have to make sure the window in the room is open. I don’t know if they stand back or he comes back, but I realize it’s really time for me to tell him that I’m leaving. He felt like he was giving me space to get myself together, but I realize that I need to leave.

So I look around, and I see my grandmother’s quilt so I fold that up because I want to take that with me. I just realize that even though I haven’t finished clearing myself with the breathing pattern, I need to tell him I’m leaving. I start to tell him that, and he’s indignant because he figured I was just taking space to get my head together, and maybe we should talk about this or that.

I said if you want to talk about something we can talk about you drinking. It was like, I don’t want to go there. I just want to get focused on my packing, but all I can really see that I’m clear I want to take is my grandmother’s quilt. I may have some clothes and stuff, but anyway that’s when I wake up.

John: This is a dream where sadness can come. It can invoke a sadness because what happens is you take and you go to a type or aspect of something that is opening up and waking up in a higher self part of your nature. It’s like a third level. In other words, you step out into that to see how that is. And in doing so, you can’t stay there.

For some reason or another you also have to deal with things that are pent up or part of your nature of your past, so you have to come back down like in the middle part of yourself where the collective and all this stuff is going on. And of course there’s an even lower self of that, that has somewhat of an influence on the middle area, which is not really that big of a concern upon the third level.

And there you have to try to absolve yourself of what all of that is in terms of its effect upon you. And as you work to absolve yourself, you develop a clarity, and as you develop that clarity, then you’re able to shift back up to the third floor. As you shift back up to the third floor you have an awareness about things that is different. Before you might have accepted… you were accepting kind of a period of time like a trial basis or something. You know, it was still new and original and fresh and innocent to you, but now you have a higher pristine sense of it all.

In other words, you know more how something needs to be up there, whether it’s right or not right. In other words, where you may have ignored things before, now you can’t. You notice the little imbalances up there that occur on that level, that you weren’t aware of, now you are aware of them. You can see the smoke and you can see this and you can see that.

Now what you’re trying to do is you’re realizing that you can’t stay in that condition. Something has to shift because it is not right for you, because you’re also part of creation, you’re also part of the middle area. So, you actually take a step back. You make a decision to leave that, and you try to hold a memory, though, of what you consider important in terms of a certain depth by having to take something that has been shaped or quilted together, that has been knit together. You try to take that with you back down into the confrontation of things.

You are holding something that is unconscious, it is making you sad in some fashion, and that something is a subtle agitation and you’re not able to quite shift that, you’re not able to quite absorb that, and it works as a type of very subtle pressure. However, what you’re doing, what you end up doing in the dream, is you have this image where you end up succumbing to that tension as opposed to working it through.

The way this becomes a dilemma is, as you progress, and as you grow, what may have been wonderful on one level, you start to develop a sight to where something is missing in other ways, in other regards, in terms of your responsibility in a conscious way. And it is about a type of responsibility.

You have one thing you have to contend with in the third level, and you have another way of taking and being able to deal with things more with a separate aspect inside of yourself that has its own light and mannerism. You have another way of dealing with it on the second level. On the third level when you come to see what all is involved there, it can be a bit overwhelming.

But to begin with it is kind of intriguing, and so you can indulge and go into that, but ultimately it becomes very daunting and you can always find something in terms of the tension and the mannerism of that on the third level that can cause you to basically say enough is enough.

In that evaluation, you come to see things that you normally hadn’t paid any attention to before, the smoking, the this, the that, the drinking, which is basically just saying that there is something that is energetically off. And so you have to take what you’ve reached, and step back with it.

What’s really interesting about this is, this is actually kind of a dream that I have seen myself do. I have seen myself take and look over into a space, first of all giving it a good go, and then concluding that this is somehow too much for me, or I’m not ready, or not qualified, or whatever.

And then I step back, and then I go into a type of what I used to call a controlled waiting, knowing that I had stopped and would have to wait. And I had essentially reached some sort of crossroads where I couldn’t figure something out, couldn’t absorb it, so I realized that I just then had to go back and take the beating in the outer, knowing that at some particular point in time something would be ready to take that in again.

And that I believe is what we go through, at points in time in our life, and everyone goes through that over and over and over again as they progress. As something opens up there’s always the question as to whether you’re ready for that, or you want to contend with that, or not. You’re seeing that mannerism or that aspect inside of yourself, based upon denoting the pattern or the mechanism of change that has occurred. So this is set off, this whole thing inside of yourself.

And what you’re actually also looking at is a type of social paradigm that exists, in that, especially in our parents, there was always an expectation and a way of being that, once it got established they just accommodated and accommodated and accommodated. And we are of a generation where we realize that we make changes to things, that we adjust, that we shift, and to some degree that can be a little daunting and baffling to something that’s more used to an established set order.

As a consequence, we do this energetically – all of the time. More so than maybe we realize, because the more unconscious you are, the more irresponsible you’re able to be. And if you’re really, really unconscious you could just malaise along on the second level or even the first level, which has some parallels to the second level because it’s reflective, and it’s in the outer, although the second level is deemed one that has more understanding and the first level is something that’s really just pure lower self.

And you’re not pure lower self. You have the overflow of the lower self into something in which you have an understanding, and if you have taken something with you to be able to better cope there, because the third level, the way that it’s opened up, you’re not quite ready to embrace and that third level opens up things as an awareness in which it too is unsettling. Things in consciousness are unsettling.

Your first dream started you off trying to absorb all of that, and then after a while you got familiar with the back and forth and the back and forth and the back and forth trying to absorb it, kind of being caught in a reverb.

And so when you’re like that, you have two choices to make. One is that somehow or another it goes away because it is absorbed, or falls away based upon the higher self, or you don’t have to contend with it anymore because you go into a space, and you justify and rationalize going into that space, and it’s a space where it’s numbed down, or dumbed down, and it’s no longer something that afflicts you.

The problem with this kind of transition inside of yourself is, it’s an interesting one to make and we all make it from time to time, and that doesn’t work either, because what’s happened is you did tweak something, and even though it wasn’t right, and didn’t quite make sense, and wasn’t something you were quite ready to take on – you can’t forget it.

And so if you then take a step back from that, there is the memory of the other that just doesn’t totally blank out. Somewhat it does, maybe for a period of time, but not totally. And so you’re spurred on in some strange fashion as a result of an uneasiness, and so the real sadness that exists, is actually the recognition of that, not fully embraced or taken on.

So the deeper aspect of your dreaming is that first of all the reverbing we’re trying to absorb, and then in the recognition of these different levels, you actually have an even deeper, higher self recognition of something that you’re overwhelmed by. It’s not something that is clear to you. The imbalances are kind of getting clearer to you, but that higher part isn’t quite there, and there’s a sadness that it’s not quite there.

What this dream is essentially – gosh this is a subtle dream – because it is essentially holding you culpable. In other words, it looks like you’re making a decision in the present, in relationship to an energetic, but basically it is an aspect of a reverb of a repeat in which you said or turned back before.

So as you get closer and closer and closer to a higher-self breakthrough, you’re going to have this level of sadness, only because within your psyche is a recollection of having taken a step back before and tried to go amnesic in relationship to it, and carry something back with you to make your step back easier, something that you had shaped and quilted before, and tried to be able to live and play with that.

And you can get by like that for a while, but to the degree to which there is something really latent that’s been touched or awoken or seen as being there on the horizon, you don’t quite completely, fully lose that, and so in your unconscious you continue to hold a type of sadness in regard to the potentiality. That’s a very deep dream.

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The Greater Part of You

Today we have a continuation of the conversation we began on Friday, in Saying Yes to the Process.

Here John leads us through the ideas of the processes of dream work itself, and the unfolding of the spiritual journey as the energetically awakened person begins to see the world around them more from the inner into the outer, and explores the concept of holding both the unconscious and conscious aspects of life as one thing. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: Yesterday I had a very, very complicated and detailed dream, that I couldn’t remember one lick of when I came out of it. As a consequence of that dream I was in revolt to everything. I couldn’t identify with the outer environment around me or with anybody.

Everything was nausea, everything was kind of insecure. I was kind of like cracking up.

So I went to bed. Jeane takes and has two great dreams of which she always remembers her dream. She rolls over and touches me and same thing, poof, completely gone.

I kind of laid there in the cradle not even wanting to get up. When I get up I go back to meditating and meditate until 12:30pm. Basically all morning long – still not able to identify with anybody or anything and still in this very strange state.

When I come out of it I go out and announce, which I had announced to Jeane earlier in the morning, that I’m toxic and therefore I’m not going to eat for the next three days. You know, the feminine always take that as a shocker, you know boom like that. He’s really flipped out.

At 12:30pm I get up, I take a long walk, and I come back at about 4pm, and the TV is on and I’ll be darned panning around is one of my favorite shows, A Bronx Tale.

But it’s on a channel with all kinds of commercials and it’s got a lot of filthy language in it because it is one of those types that has very deep meaning but uses extremes to get there, and they’re dubbing it out because it’s on regular TV – plus with all of those commercials.

So I’m now flipping out again because I’m cracked; I’m fragile. So it gets recorded, the other half of it or so, and I disappear again and meditate for a couple more hours because I can’t relate to anymore TV or anything.

And I come out of that and watch it and it’s really good and everything, but I’m still feeling in this state where I’m a little disconcerted. Now, as far as a certain level of sight, it’s enhanced. But as far as a dexterity in the outer, I feel very helpless and weak.

As far as talking about things that other people talk about that consider important in terms of outer things, I probably am dangerous to talk to in a state like this, because I’m liable to shock them. I might not be polite enough you know to cater to it.

Also what tripped this, the night before last, was we pretty much set up a movie we were going to watch. It’s actually a very excellent movie with a lot of depth to it, Water for Elephants.

Jeane selected it and I thought it was a dumb movie but it turned out to not be, so we had the movie room reserved and she had a friend that was coming down. This was in… oh, I forget what they call it – it’s a special way of filming so it’s really high tech and whatnot  – and of course we have a pretty phenomenal movie room here, so at 8 o’clock this person hadn’t showed up yet.

And before they showed up about 8:15pm, I could already feel the vibe, and by 8:30pm I didn’t even want to watch the movie. Well, what this person is, is this person is an incredibly brilliant person, very deeply developed on a spiritual level, but so insecure it’s unbelievable.

I’m so much of a type of raw energy, that if a person was really insecure, I’m going to hit that button right off the bat. I mean, I was aware of this before she showed up. I felt I needed to disappear.

And then when she showed up she greets me with all kinds of openness because she knows Jeane real well and I don’t feed her insecurity button, and she starts to crack. And then she tries to make a comeback, and it doesn’t work you know because, I don’t know, I’m just a hard ass in some sense, and I say I don’t even mean to be that way. It’s just kind of a quality there and all of it was useful because what it did is it threw me into this nausea.

I mean this is a wonderful person and what came up was a discussion in which there was another person in here that has a lot of momentum, accomplishes a lot, but is vicious…

But you know they can’t help themselves if they’re vicious and I couldn’t stand the judgement of it, so I took this person’s defense even though I don’t agree with it. I also don’t agree with any black-and-white rubbing out something. And of course that will hit the insecurity button right away, because this person finds that sort of thing repulsive. If you find certain things repulsive, and you are reactive, you’re not going to be able to carry the kundalini energy.

And she had accessed things and she had developed a sensitivity and a brilliance, but then comes the next installment that could take her miles and miles down the road – would be the kundalini energy – and it will freak her out. It’s too much for her.

Jeane likes her because she finds her so brilliant, but she’s is also very, very careful to know how to handle her in terms of her insecurity.

I joke to Jeane, I say, “That’s an amazing talent that you have.” Just like I can take someone that can walk up and stick a gun in my ribs as I’m walking down the street and just start talking to him as if they are a long lost brother, and then when we hit the corner they go one way across the street and I go the other way as if nothing had happened. And anybody else they would have freaked out and they would have gotten robbed and who knows what all.

But I don’t feed into that and so it doesn’t work. There is a kind of a natural intertwining. I think I have told you this story of this other guy that’s so dangerous that he puts people in hospitals when he flipped out, and I would talk to him and everybody else would give him a wide space because they knew if he flipped out, and you’re around, you are going to be in bad shape.

I like the guy. I never felt any… I mean I could feel the rumble of that quality in his nature that was out of control but it was almost like driving a car. I knew how to drive that, how to steer or something, and appreciate the wondrousness that this guy had inside of him too…

One has to get like that and be like that in order to break the trances of the outer.

Because the outer is nothing but a reflection of energetics, conscious and unconscious. In other words, you’re going to come to a point in your dreaming where you are going to realize that the access that you are having that is reflective has a limitation too.

In other words, the outer is all reflective and your dreams are reflective but they go to a different depth. They incorporate a certain soul element that moves around…

But the soul element is also caught in having to be in creation, in a magnetism of a human body in terms of earth, and it’s a little bit baffling and a little bit confusing, so the images that come through you speak of something on the other side, but put it in a language that has to do with symbolism that is an earth energy.

And you lead through the earth energy to understand the symbolism on the other side, or the meaningfulness on the other side. Well, because your senses work most of the time, 99.9% of the time, outwardly and the mind of course is there interpreting those outward senses, when you have a dream that you remember, what you have actually done is you have stopped the mind and have settled yourself.

You didn’t realize that you stopped your mind, when you were sleeping, but you have stopped all of that moving around in an outer way capacity that just yo-yos back and forth and doesn’t have any sense of cadence. You have paused enough in order for this greater dimension to leak through, just like when I’m unsettled and cracking up, Jeane just touching me, it sets a trepidation off where she loses her dreams, or that quality of the other side trying to communicate through as a kind of language of the macro, to which she really is at a deeper level.

When you dream and then you are reducing this to images that you then cypher through to see what’s going on as a movement of the soul at a deeper level, what you’re doing in the dream process is first and foremost is you’re establishing first of all a stability and a sense and a training and an understanding, and a strength, by which you then can be subjected to access of the greater part of yourself.

When you are really fairly trite and dense, you can’t handle much and so everything is kept really basic. The outer is the outer and it’s no more than that. But then when you start to get more subtly refined and developed inside, to where you can access the greater part of yourself, then you come to recognize that the outer is nothing more than a reflection of the inner.

To begin with you struggle with your dreams in that you have to somehow get to the point where what you see in your dreams you don’t apply in an outer context. To begin with you do. To begin with you think oh, well it means I did this, that, and the other – I’ll change that in terms of what I do tomorrow.

To begin with, it’s a lot like that, all still cycling around your narrow perspective of life. But ultimately it gets to where you can’t do it that way anymore. That’s the nausea that you hit, that’s the third part of your dream. You can’t do it that way anymore.

You cannot be subjected to the limitations of power and control; you are intertwined with it all. You cannot handle you being treated as if everything operates in its own separate way and is distinct. You know better than that.

When you get like that, well, here’s the dilemma you run into, like Jeane starts out and she recognizes both the conscious and the unconscious, and then she learns how to take and put that sort of thing into kind of an order by which she can then express herself. Her dream described right where she was at in terms of using the energy, but it also portrayed the nausea in another way.

And I said to her that her dream was where she had both the conscious and the unconscious simultaneously. How can you be okay with it just being that way – in a state of a type of nothingness?

In other words, it hasn’t been formed into anything whereby you’ve streamlined yourself to utilize it. That can break you into a million pieces. That can cause you to throw away everything that you had identified with in terms of the sense of satisfaction.

There’s a way of interpreting your dream and this would be a completely wrong interpretation and fortunately you haven’t gone there, I don’t think, but there would be a way of interpreting the dream to think that your marriage is going to fall apart or something. And that is completely, completely totally wrong.

And that’s how the kundalini energy can destroy you, because that isn’t what the kundalini energy is about at all. The kundalini energy is there to cause you to take a step within. Everything in the outer, all of that, is meant to be an inner to outer correlation, not prison.

The outer is not a prison, it’s a reflection of the inner. Ultimately the outer reflects the inner.

That’s why when things are in a certain state of flux, here in creation, there is a similar flux in the ethers, or in the higher self, or the higher whatever, as above so below. And we are sitting with an access to it all, by being able to hold into the depths of something as the microcosm. In other words, there’s both the expanse and the contraction and the expanse and the contraction ultimately reveal the same thing.

As an example, the contraction you could take and put something under a microscope and you could see that every cell is identical to every other cell in the human body. Basically they have a blueprint, and that blueprint has a quality about it just like a fingerprint. It has a quality about it that is unique.

The microscope or the technology of minuteness can take and break the atom all the way to the point that it can get to the epicenter of all of the energy in creation where you have the big bang or poof effect just through a type of nuclear kind of way they call it nuclear anyway, a nuclear kind of going and going and going to the point where through the microcosm you get to everything that there is.

It goes that way too. We live in the microcosm. We have access through the microcosm to everything in the macrocosm. It’s amazing that there is no time and there is no space and you can play with it either in terms of expansion or contraction.

And a human being yo-yos back and forth between expansion and contraction which is the same thing as saying one minute they’re happy, and the next minute they’re sad, and one minute their heart is dancing, and the next minute their heart is crushed.

And then they start to maybe even develop some of the traits from Proverbs, or Ecclesiastes or whatever, that in other words don’t get too elated because then you are going to get sad or whatever as if there is an equanimity, which is a kind of Buddhist term now.

You know, trying to find that love of equanimity so you do not throw yourself around. This is just the order of things. Another way of saying expansion and contraction would be conscious and unconscious.

What we consider consciousness is in the outer an idea of how to best fend for yourself, and the most responsible and know how to walk across the street without getting hit and all of that we consider that a type of understanding as a type of consciousness. What we consider unconsciousness is a person that’s sleepwalking and they walk across the street and kabango. That’s unconsciousness.

That unconsciousness is a quality that includes everything in the overall. Consciousness has taken and streamlined and limited something.

Here’s another way of describing it. The world is created out of sound. So everything resonates a pitch or a sound. There is a sound in the universe and you can hear that sound.

Now let’s apply science to it. So science has come along and they’ve taken and they have figured out what’s called frequencies. And they can make a frequency, we will call it a cellular frequency, and the cellular frequency can handle voice technology, it can have the frequency that can transmit television and news radio and such. That’s streamlined, that’s precision, that’s taking something out, of you might say, a type of unconsciousness and made it conscious in the outer.

Then you can take the same frequency and you can go from what’s called analog to digital in which you tighten the frequency and now it handles and transmits and projects better things like data packets.

And then you could say well gee, I have accumulated all of this. I need to be able to contain it in some fashion. So now they’ve developed what is called microwave, which is a type of working with light where you zip this to maybe a home base like a central computer or something. So now you are able through the microwave to spray this around when before when you took something out of the macrocosm as a microcosm, you limited it, because a radiowave can only project so far, but now when you convert it back to light you can start to expand it back out into the macro.

The secret, the key here is to get to the point where you can be both conscious and unconscious simultaneously.

In other words, the dream I had last night is I went home and there’s a baby laying first of all kind of in the middle of the bed or towards the middle of the bed and suddenly it’s laying right on the very corner on the end.

And I start to wonder what would happen to this baby if it rolls off the bed. Sure enough, the baby rolls off the bed and eyes open up, the mother goes over and picks it up, the mother being my mom, picks it up, and the baby can talk.

Pretty sharp baby! The baby’s joking around about something that dad had said that indicate that the baby is going to be put on welfare, and the baby is laughing about it as if this is a joke because the baby knows. The baby can reason and knows stupidity when it hears stupidity.

Then finally I’m looking at the baby, the baby says, “Who are you?” I say, “I am your older brother.”

Then the baby comments about that, makes some comment, and I say, “Yeah, there is another brother, but I’m the oldest.” And then I try to remember another brother I had, but I can’t remember him. So it’s like he’s my other brother, but I feel like I am 40 in the dream yet my younger brother’s 20.

And the whole thing is this baby is in a state of unconsciousness, so to speak, connected to the soul of things, and I’m in a state of sophistication connected to creation and supposedly having lived life and have a certain conscious recollection about things, yet to this baby everything is unconscious.

Wow, I am a baby. That baby is me, we’re intertwined.

Ann: Boy, that’s pretty powerful.

John: So both the conscious and the unconscious have to be carried together. It’s the only way that inner can properly come into outer, it’s the only way that the inner and the outer can be correlated.

Otherwise, to the degree to which you have a depth of awareness inside of yourself, you’re going to keep building bigger castles, and you’re going to have no problem with the kundalini energy, except the kundalini energy is not designed the way the teacher’s teacher put it. The kundalini energy is one third on this side and two thirds on the other side.

It’s designed to open you up to the greater part of yourself. And when you open up to the greater part of yourself, then you come to find out that this path is about service. The reason why it’s put in those words is because you have a responsibility to the Whole.

And as you take on that responsibility of the Whole, you function differently.

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