Posts Tagged ‘higher self lower self’

hoardingIt can seem perfectly sensible to store things away in preparation for “needing them someday.” This urge can be driven by practicality, or a feeling of safety, or a fear of being without. And it is just these same type of urges that keep us holding on to our psychologies and defense mechanisms: fear we won’t recognize ourselves without them, the safety of not feeling vulnerable without them, or the practicality of being expedient in social dealings. Yet these issues are lower-self territories. Our higher self has more important things to do. It is often when we see the greater need, through our higher self, that we can overcome what is preventing us in the lower self. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So, in the meditation dream, the dream starts out in which I realize I’m overwhelmed because I do not know how to sort out what there is that is situated and lying before me. In other words, I’m in a malaise, and I have no plans for facing this, and am allowing the holding on to drain me with its contractual weightiness.

In other words, weightiness is caused by the mind that holds onto things, and you hold onto things thinking you’re going to need it later. Whether you do, or not, you still tell yourself that story. Suddenly I am able to see, it’s almost like I’ve had the good fortune of being able to drop this weightiness of the mind so that there is in a flash, like a flash of light or something, is a flash and how to let go of it. It is like a flash because I have reached a place inside where I let go of the mental weightiness as something that I’ve been holding onto in an attached way.

Until I hit this flash, I held onto what was there as something I wasn’t ready to let go of. I would justify holding onto this as being something that I would need, or needed, even though I may not necessarily know how I needed it. The idea in and of itself was sufficient to keep holding on.

However, when I speeded up to a space within, in which there was no time and space, that I felt compelled to sustain, then it was easy to realize at that time that this did nothing for me, that what this was doing actually was draining my energy. Now what it was doing for me was something still in the imaginative, unrealized, and therefore made up spiritual perhaps in that kind of way of looking at it.

To begin with, in the dream, before I reached a depth within in which there was an inflection to a vibrational emptiness in which my mental imagery attachments could go poof, I carried a weightiness that I couldn’t sort through. As I felt this weightiness I saw myself as looking around in what appeared, you know, in terms of inner visualization, a kind of warehouse cluttered with things that I felt I might someday need.

In other words, I could feel how this controlled me, these things that were just there, because I had to at least acknowledge their presence, and had no way of knowing how to open the place up. Then the letting-go inflective hit, in a flash, in which I felt how to go to the end all, be all before me, meaning I could let go to only that which touched me in the flash – and none of this touched me in that flash of light. This was like a denseness.

The result of this vibrational flash was I was able to glean, I was able to denote, to take in, the letting-go vibration, and the energy behind this letting go carried me into a spatial quality of emptiness from which I was able to realize, to recognize, to be in a stillness where I am simultaneously empty and free. Being able to be empty and free is what you always seek, but you’re caught in the weightiness.

So the significance of this is, this dream has caused me to bring through all kinds of thoughts that I was repressing as an aspect of the vibrational weightiness that I had. I don’t mean to walk around in this weightiness, but am. It’s a mental thing, not a heart thing, and it has to do with projecting, in a mental way, responsibilities and duties and such that are imagined in which I rationalize, and of course my way of rationalizing is saying that I need to hold onto it because there are situations and circumstances that are going to come up in which I’m going to need to have this.

But all projections like this come from the mind, not from the heart. When I let go of the mental gymnastics the heart can, in a flash, know what to do, or what not to do. The heart in a flash is free of such contanglements. It’s like, you know, shifting automatically one place to the next. There’s nothing gradual about that.

The meaning is, what I am dreaming about is the distinction between heart and mind. The mind is heavier and geared to reaching reflective conclusions. When the reflective magnetism is dropped, a person is able to experience the heart. The heart is a vibrational letting go to an inner emptiness in which that which dreams this inner place denies the essence of that light.

If the image doesn’t conform to the heartfelt insight of letting go of the mind-conditioned weight that is there, because I do not know how to let go, or be able to release, my beingness into a stillness – I sit in kind of an inner prison. I sit in the mind. I sit in the reflective barrier.

Prior to this dream, there were thoughts and vibrational images I took to be important because I identified with such outer perceptions as physical responsibility. The difference is I came to realize a higher-self responsibility in which I was able to let go of outer physical limitations. The higher-self beingness required an inner freedom to be there as a letting go emptiness in the overall spatiality.

So the importance is I can yield to the importance of not having to constantly carry a mental weight and expectation, preconditioned mannerism, that I’ve imposed upon myself and, therefore, am not letting go of it, and not getting into the overall stillness because I’m making that louder. The question is: can I let go? And if I do let go, am I going to pick it back up again in some other capacity of reflective mental gymnastic and gyration? So that’s the meditation dream.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: The Hoarder

Read Full Post »

590mIt can seem hard to grasp that we are made of many inner lives – because we think of ourselves as one person. But we have a part of us that is concerned with safety, and a part concerned with fun and excitement. We have a part that seeks the high and the spiritual, and we have parts that love exercise, food, and sex – all the sensual appetites we experience. All these lives need to be on board with us as we make our journey, because they are either for us, or they will distract us from what we are trying to do. In other words, we can’t leave them behind, or suppress them, we have to get them to understand why they should join us on the trip. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: Well, my dreams last night were just a little bit frustrating. What I remember of the first dream, I seem to be out on the ocean in some kind of a boat, or a small ship, and there was a bigger ship that contained people that were searching for me.

So, initially, I’m able to hide, but then it feels like there’s someone that comes on the ship that I’m with, and the people I’m with, that sees me – but he’s not one of the one’s that knows he hunting for me. In other words, maybe I just look like one of the other passengers.

So, in one way, I know I’ve been seen, but I haven’t been seen by the people that actually knew what they were hunting for, so I don’t get a sense that I was captured then. But then I have a subsequent dream…

John: So what you’re describing is an amnesia state that exists between yourself, your higher self and your lower self, and that the greater teacher is all those people that are looking for something. That’s the outer. And within that is something that is real, and everyone is looking for something.

Everyone is trying to sort something out, but they get caught up in their senses into the situation and circumstances in the outer. And even when they come across something in which there should be a one-to-one correspondence, or recognition, even then it’s not inclined to exist because it’s so easy to get caught in one’s sidestep mannerisms.

Jeane: And then I had a dream where it feels like there was a group of us that were caught, and they want us to confess to something – but it’s something we haven’t done. But some of the others are taken away and tortured, so I feel like we’ll probably all be hanged because they were tortured to confess, so it didn’t matter whether you’d really done it or not.

John: Well happens there is, and that’s one of the reasons why one goes off and tries to complete the ocean journey in a little ship, but it takes the big ship in order to cross the ocean. It takes everything and everyone.

But you attempt to do it in the little ship because what you see in the collective, that has the latent energy of things that’s in the outer, of which all of the outer is a component and part of yourself, so what you see in these others is something that you can’t necessarily… It doesn’t recognize. It just doesn’t know, and when it doesn’t know, and when it’s in an ignorance, it can be a danger. It can take and it can do something that can be painful, or hurtful.

And so, as a consequence, that’s why you can have the waywardness of going off and trying to do something on your own, to have your own little ship instead of control and circumstances that you think make it easier – because you know what it’s like to become too open, and too obvious, amongst those who are at a different point on the path. What you’re apt to generate is some sort of rejection, or defense mechanism, or denial, or shutting off.

You actually tend to see this sort of thing amongst the people who are still more or less newbies on the path, meaning those who are young in life, that haven’t had a chance, through life’s lessons, to kind of recognize that there is something more going on. And so what’s also so interesting is that those people who are least inclined to recognize that there is something more going on, are the ones who think that they are experiencing something, and are attached, so to speak, to how they are and where they are.

Thus the danger that exists amongst friends, so-called friends, who all kind of support a process that becomes spiritualized, and is in a bit of a nausea, and also true in terms of people that you think you can play it safe with, that might be kind of simple and naïve and whatnot and you can kind of just kind of float in that naivete, and that simplicity, and be unnoticed.

But where you can gain the greatest benefit is amongst those that have developed a certain kind of maturity, that you might say, I suppose if you were to put a word on it, a kind of old soul. We put to the term an old soul is a person who has a realization that comes up inside of themselves from somewhere, in terms of a consciousness, that goes outside of the collective norm.

But you can have, in the outer, old souls that are very, very accomplished in their being, and in their ways, that may be on a deviation, a heavy deviation. But they’re able to be on this deviation when others cannot, which means that they have learned something, they have grown, they have taken a step, they have made realizations inside of themselves and they actually have interesting adabs that you would not think are possible, that the uncouth and immature have yet to catch up with.

The reason why I’m saying all of this is that your dream, first of all, is pointing out to you that it’s important for you to be in the mixture of things. There’s a danger of being in the mixture of things because shit happens, but in the mixture of things everything is there, everything is included, everything is before you. And you’re not to make this journey in your little ship all by yourself off to one side.

And so what is the singularity of a journey? The singularity of a journey can be a process in which you streamline what it is that you want to take in as an approach and, therefore, you shut off everything else that is part of the overall. And the fact that you then are shutting off other parts that are aspects of the overall, you are, in your conceptualization, thinking that you’re making things easier – and you’re mind is telling you that you’re avoiding complexities – but in reality you are not playing with all of the chips that have to be played with on the table.

And, therefore, whatever result occurs is going to be bifurcated, or limited, in some way. Or is going to be incomplete, and may even go off on some sort of sick tangent, because it fails to recognize what it needs to recognize as part of itself yet, having purged it to such a degree that it can’t find it anymore.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: The Big Ship

Read Full Post »

Bond_of_Union_M.C. Escher

M.C. Escher

It is common to think of our journey as connecting to higher things – and, of course, there’s truth in that. Yet that higher part is also within us, our higher self. In that sense, we are trying to bring that higher part of us down into the lower, earthly, everyday, matter-of-fact lower-self of our lives. That’s the work of it, cleaning up the lower to make a space for the higher. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: My dream starts off where there are these levels that somehow need to be able to be lined up, and I know I can line them up and I have to adjust my frame of thinking because I’m not used to seeing how the things come together and line up, the levels line up. And I end up seeing multiple combinations where they’re actually broken in two, and in another instance they’re not broken in two.

If they’re broken in two I don’t have quite enough hands to put it in place because one layer is inclined to drop a little beneath another layer, so it doesn’t necessarily click into place. But if it’s all on one same level or various levels, I have to adjust a certain kind of focus almost like you cross your eyes, it’s a way of seeing, in other words, by which this happens and you can’t get to where this will work or happen with your ordinary faculties. You have to kind of let go of those and then there’s a naturalness that pulls that into an intertwined connection.

And if you stop to think about it, that’s when it gets really complicated. And then it’s almost like you don’t even have enough hands to be able to do it – when otherwise it’s almost like you can almost not even touch it and you can just kind of see by kind of an osmosis nature this sort of thing coming into its natural alignment. It becomes more and more hands on the more you find yourself dwelling upon it and trying to figure it out. That’s the meditation dream.

In the main dream this approach to all of these different levels and whatnot is put into action, in which my attention though isn’t where it needs to be. It’s not so much on the levels, but in terms of what is necessary to clean up oil spills.

And these are strange kinds of oil spills in that I have one mop that I generally use that’s soaked in a particular solvent, and I guess this solvent spreads far and wide because if I take it over the area of that it soaks it right up, it puts out flames if it’s on fire or whatever the condition may be. And it’s a type of mop that I can use to do battle with forces that may even try to stop me from doing this cleanup.

And so that seems to be what I do. But then I come to see that being able to, or having a calling to, do that is one thing, being able to get to where it can be done is a whole other thing. That’s the issue. That’s the issue and that’s the dilemma of the meditation dream, was how do I take and connect this stuff together, how do I make this align together? If I think about it too much, it just goes on and on and on in its complexities.

And so in this dream I’m standing at the top of what’s like a huge interstate that’s way up off the ground in which you have the cloverleafs, and all of the different turns and curves where you have the exits, and just multiple exits dropping down to this level and that level and that level. And I’m standing at the top and I can peer down over the edge as you have this road going this way and that road going that way, and I have no idea how to get to what I can see down below – but there’s a big oil spill down there.

I could run into a lot of resistance even to try to clean this up, and so this time I decide to do it differently. Before I only used one mop soaked in solvent, this time I get two mops and I’m carrying the two of them so I can clean up any spill in between, and maybe be able to take care of that one which is where I start heading to go to.

But just because I can see it doesn’t mean I can get there, because as soon as I start to get there then I have to go these circuitous routes, and I’m going through my inner eye in terms of how I have a sense to where that’s at, and I end up at a gas station where there’s a minor cleanup. And I end up where there are trucks that have been parked and they’ve dribbled a little oil. I mean this isn’t where I’m trying to get to.

And the suspense is there: how do I get to this oil spill that I saw? How do I come down and keep coming down to the point where I finally get to what is at hand that needs to be cleaned up? In other words, that’s my challenge in terms of confronting it. In other words, this is how I deal with the levels that become like veils – because until you can go from top to bottom you could stand maybe at one point and have a sense of the higher-self being able to peer all the way down and through, but when you would start coming down you have to confront the veils and stuff, and you have to go according to some pulse that you feel inside that keeps going and going and probing and probing and probing to get there, and never get distracted to the point where you stop to clean up something that’s trivial.

Yes, you deal with the stuff to some degree, and of course one of the places I stop is this gas station and the owner there is just way too busy. All he can do is operate the business he’s so busy, so he’s real appreciative that somebody out of the blue, you know nothing compelled me to clean this up, comes in and gives him a helping hand. But he doesn’t even have time to say thank you even, but I could tell he’s real appreciative because he’s busy, busy, busy. But I’m hard pressed to get to this real spill. I can feel that inside. Now, there’s a real spill that needs and is calling me to get to to clean up before it catches fire or something.

So that’s the dream. And the little meaning I wrote about it is the challenge is that of being able to access what I am able to see in my mind’s eye and upon an inner sensation level. First I have to see through, or how to get beyond, the veils that exist.

Well, you don’t really see through the veils, so you have to sense through them. There’s something that pulls you through, pulls you along, and some of these veils are even new to me. In other words, this particular spill has caused me to suddenly have to contend with veils I hadn’t realized, or turns and twists and levels that I had never realized or recognized.

Before I used to see myself as someone that just did this, but now all of a sudden I’m having to realize that it’s one thing to do this, and it’s another thing to get there, to access it, to be able to relate to it, to be able to communicate with it or whatever it is.

And it is an issue of communication, because there was another dream inside there that I can barely remember in which the issue wasn’t the knowing, but the issue is to figure out how to communicate it so that it was understandable. Some of these veils are new to me, and I am just now figuring out how to reach through or beyond to a natural connection. In the dream this coming down and pulling together what is needed is the challenge. If I can do that, I will be transcending the veils and will be able to do what needs to be done to clean up inadvertent spills in life.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: Transcending the Veils

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »