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Posts Tagged ‘holding on to nothingness’

John: In the next dream I notice that there are game animals roaming around the local area. I think I report it to someone, or talk to others about it.

So this image is from a different dream, but it continues on the prior image (see Into the Woods) where I sense that there are animals hidden in the deeper forest. Permission was given to seek out those animals that very few people ever seek – though I didn’t see them in that dream.

In this image, that which had been veiled or hidden (by the dense forest) becomes made known, becomes familiar (the animals are in the local area); it emerges into the visible realms. The key to these “hidden animals” becoming visible seems to be based on the idea that those who naturally follow that which touches them from within are the ones who are able to take that energetic and touch all of life, as a spark, awakening things in others.

We all respond differently to life, and different things light us up from within. Too often, we take that inner spark and become personally indulgent with it – we overdo it. But there’s something behind these inner sparks, which can be understood as a vibrational note that resonates within as an excitement. It’s from that spark that something is quickened in us.

These deeper inner connections then emerge or manifest into our life, but we don’t want to forget that they come from the Nothingness (rather than from us). This next dream image shows the risks of becoming too indulgent with this quickened energy.

In this image I’ve been affected by something that’s quickened or excited me (something has emerged) and in this quickened state I’m bolder about things than I normally would be.

I see our teacher passing by in a crowd. Ordinarily I would just acknowledge that he’s there, but instead I eagerly seek him out.

Just before he passes through a doorway and out of sight, I catch up to him. In a quiet voice he indicates that he has been hurt by something that happened. My immediate inflection is that he’s hurt by the fact that I’ve searched him out in a particular energetic way (a personally indulgent way) instead of holding on to Nothingness, which is the state that the teacher holds.

His statement of being hurt shows a type of giving up, in order to enable him to approach something from another way. I can sense that he’s not projecting his usual power, which I sometimes read as a type of aloofness or distance that I can feel wounded by.

He comments that he’s just not feeling well. A person’s wellness at the level of the teacher is associated with the wellness of the whole, and he then refers to something that he revealed to me in the past (in real life), but I’m not sure I can pull out any details about that.

This dream takes me back to an inner point where there’s the recognition of how, in the real depths within, there’s nothing but Nothingness. What I described earlier (the animals) came out of the Nothingness and, as a consequence, I’m able to see that the original spark must be a bit like a thought of God, which is intended to effect Creation.

So I’m again looking at the station of Nothingness, which is a state that exists prior to Oneness, in which or from which the sensations that have yet to manifest into Creation are occurring. This last dream image refers back to that.

In other words, this imagery causes the realization that what arises from the Nothingness comes through as an inflective force, a vibration that’s exciting. Then, in manifesting into Creation, it portrays the whole process of why Creation is important, in the sense of how it brings something out of the Nothingness, for seeing and hearing purposes, and in doing so, reveals that a human being really is the intermediary of that evolutionary process.

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John: I have slowly become aware that there is this greater space available to us. There is, of course, the way I normally am in the world and that prevents me from accessing this greater space. But if there were a way to unplug myself from the way I usually proceed, that greater space would be open to me.

To begin with, this realization was interesting in and of itself. But then I observed a repeating pattern in myself, where I would flinch at things, have reactions to what was occurring. It was these reactions, where I would shrink from the moment, that prevented me from stepping through into the greater space. This greater space – my higher self – requires an ability to let go and to trust, which can then lead to expanded insight.

The higher self is defined, in its higher self, as nothingness – not as a substance or a mannerism, but as nothingness. The dilemma that the lower self has is that it always sees things as needing to make sense in some fashion. The lower self wants there to be order and an instant understanding of how things are. To really change things, you have to take all of the established rules, all the principles that one rests on and believes to be true – that may even be true as a matter of fact in terms of how things work in the outer world – and throw them against themselves. So even though there might be truth in them, they do not work. The fabric that holds together this quality that we understand to be the truth, this illusion from which we have been operating forever, just does not hold water.

When things reach such a point – where the established patterns and mannerisms no longer work – that creates an inner shift wherein something new and original, and completely transitional in terms of your higher self, can occur. You might say that you come closer to recognizing the divine principle that functions throughout creation. So the images you have in dreams begin to reflect this linkage, showing your acceptance of it, as opposed to images that show a rigidity in holding onto to how things have been, and a resistance to letting go.

In seeing this, and kind of understanding it, I had to go through the reactivity that I was observing in me. When I woke up I noticed that I had the reverberations inside and I wrote this up. I could feel the reverberations of the changes taking place, because the changes are in defiance of the established order and rules. It’s not that I disagree with those rules (many are self-created), but in a world in which everything is being thrown against itself, those views are also meant to fall apart so that we can hold onto nothingness instead.

And so I am sitting and looking at this, bothered by the fact that when I looked across to the greater space before, it was something that was wondrous and embracing and seemed easy to reach. Now suddenly I feel myself taking a step back, hunkering down – as a reaction – to what is taking place. And it is as if that opportunity of entry into the greater space is vanishing, and it’s because of a certain righteous attitude in terms of holding on to older precepts. And I see that it is also happening all around me, and if it happens all around, then it shuts out the potentiality of something greater coming through.

So one can’t be doing that; one has to let what is coming through, come through. One has to let go of all of this other stuff and be someone who embraces and helps to bring in what is new. There can be a grace with that, so that everything doesn’t just fall apart. The grace prevents the collateral damage from being too great during the transition, even though the change is huge. From the perspective of the divine, there has to be sanity, and one can hold onto that and build from there. That is the greater quality and aspect of the higher self coming into focus.

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