Posts Tagged ‘letting go of personal mannerisms’

ige99sAll energy is also intelligence, at any level we can consider: the energy of the sun which feeds everything on this planet in many ways, enabling its growth; the energy of motherhood which has the intelligence of how to care for a child; or the energy of youth, which urges a new life to explore and learn. These energies, these intelligences, cause what we witness during our lives. And we can connect directly to such energies, thereby gaining the intelligence of them, when we begin to let go of our personal view of life. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So, in the meditation dream, my world for a long, long time was comprised of dense outer objects that held my attention. I came to accept my fate as being an outer way of perceiving. This changed when I learned to shift my attention to a consciousness in which the outer way of having to identify things could fall away.

I can’t explain that to an objectifying mind, because that sort of thing just spins and spins the thought-upon-thought and so on, but I guess the way I would catch up with this is I would flicker from the state of outer to a letting go, and, when I would be doing that, I would be making observations as almost a type of intuitive inflection of something in a stillness. And then I would get more into the stillness, and actually more into watching and seeing how the denser things could just fall completely away, and that was more into a light.

In using a freedom of my focus and attention to go back and forth, from the outer back into the light, to the breath, I notice that I had a tendency, because as you’re doing that you’re not necessarily purified to begin with, so you have other levels that you have to catch up with and go through, and so for me there was still this tendency to indulge in outer reflections under certain conditions.

I should denote that the back and forth between a concretized plane of physical existence, and an inner plane shift, which occurred when the objectification falls away, and there is just light, is based upon awareness of breath. Or, in other words, talking about the breath of consciousness, or the breath of cycles of creation. And the out-breath, with its need to objectify the world by following thought into matter, embraces the outer with the linear momentum amidst it all.

The in-breath has a primary focus upon my essence being, concerned more towards the light of things and the letting go, causes the opposite to occur. In other words, they’re contrasts to each other. The out-breath is one thing, and in-breath is another, and generally for the longest period initial time, the average person is not because they’re geared with senses that are all outward oriented, and learn how to work with that in terms of how they see things in a dense way. They work with a momentum that is out-breath concentrated, but from this out-breath/in-breath, over and over again, back and forth, you come to notice the heartfelt magnetism of the in-breath and how it alters your attention in the outer, how they expand and contract between each other. You start to notice that.

And then back to the tendency hook for me is the idea that I can bait my buying and selling hook in a memorable way. In other words, it draws the attention of something that causes something to feel good. It causes a sense of a breakthrough kind of cutting through things kind of accomplishment, and you could get lost is the thought, and the momentum, of such action.

In other words, the image is like I knew how to bait my hook just in such and such a way in where I could go to a stream, for example, and pull out the fish, and knew just how much time to spend in each spot because I understood the ways and the mannerisms of working with a certain quality and momentum, to reach into life in that way, which is the out-breath falling, is the out-breath sense.

Then with the in-breath there is a letting go, as you want to not have to do this, and that, and the other, and want to reside in something that’s gentler, or softer, or more of an essence, and then you eventually let go of the fascination, in terms of what you’re doing for yourself, you know where you can catch the fish and stuff, and there becomes a sense where you actually start to work with facilitating the in-breath of another.

So, in the out-breath, instead of a good deal orientation for myself, I would now be excited for someone else, and find myself actually helping them get what they want. And that’s a level of consciousness. That’s a level of awareness.

And in this meditation dream not even that satisfied the outer schematic. In other words, the outer schematic is bigger than that. In other words, you can quit doing it for yourself, and you could start doing it and helping others, and yet it’s still bigger than that because the out-breath, I came to realize, that there still is a type of buying and selling.

In other words, we’re going out-breath to in-breath, out-breath to in-breath. Each level is shifting and becoming more awakened and conscious.

So, in the next level, I had the tendency to want to say goodbye and move on. In other words, not contend with the trance that the person is in, just leave them there, but the tendency to say goodbye also demagnetizes one’s energy because it really doesn’t make sense, because to do something like that actually drains you. So that means that there’s something still going on inside of yourself. You know, you’re not really letting go.

That’s a step, and that doesn’t work. That actually creates a lot of moods and anxieties and stuff like that in your nature. That has you jumping around with a lot more thoughts than you need to because you’re constantly having to do battle in that kind of inner subtleness. And then, eventually, that too, in the back and forth of the breath, falls away, and when it does there’s kind of an emptiness of being. You stop the portrayals. You just walk away. You don’t say anything, you just walk away. But you walk away holding an energetic almost to the heart in an all-pervading way. To embody that is to put, in my heart, everything around me embraced as it is, as me, and in doing so a greater awakening in the oneness of everything occurs.

So what I’m describing in the awakening process, all of which is founded in the breath, and is the condition of man, in terms of constantly breathing in and out as cycles of creation, in terms of where they’re at on the various levels, and on and on it goes until there is an overall oneness and a nonbeing therein.

To reach this level is a shift in which I am you, and you are me, and I am everything, and everything is me. When this occurs that is when I don’t exist, except as an all-encompassing nonbeing, because everything is the same aliveness, and it all goes into the oneness.

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open_spirit_by_babaIn this follow-up dream to our last post (see Can You Relate?), Jeane is again working with two aspects of herself that seem have opposing agendas. One is to be more open and integrated with others, and the other is to be more private and to keep things to herself. As the imagery unfolds, the side of her that wants to open up begins to win out. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: In this next dream, I seem to be living in an area that feels a little nomadic, in that there’s an orchard nearby that is kind of open, and I seem to be living in almost like a little travel trailer that’s expanded out, and I’ve put it in somebody’s outdoor structure. 

It’s not quite a barn, but I can tuck it under there, and then I can go around by the side of the travel trailer and go up among some wooden slats and things and that’s where I put stuff. I almost use it like a closet, except I put jewelry in little statues there, and maybe a little bit of clothing.  

Then I come around to the other side and go to where my travel trailer is, and it’s all opened out. I’m actually staying on somebody else’s property in almost like a rural area, but almost halfway in their barn. I’m kind of using it to live there, and it’s like that’s a place where I could park it that’s kind of sheltered.

Somewhere in there I’m also storing things, just keeping things that are like little treasures, jewelry and some statues. I don’t keep them in the travel trailer. I seem to keep them around the corner at someplace else in the structure.

John: And yet the structure doesn’t belong to you?

Jeane: No, I just stay there.

John: So why would you take things out of the travel trailer that belong to you – jewels and treasures – and store them in somebody else’s structure that’s temporary.

Jeane: Well, I just kind of spread them out there. It just seemed to make sense to me, because I’m kind of spread out into this little space, so it’s okay.

Then it feels like there’s some shifting, nomadic-type things going on, and you feel like other people are suddenly invading the space, like they’re in the orchard, and they’ve got a whole line of cars that they drive around me. 

It almost looks like a snake, but it’s a line of cars and they’ve pulled them up and parked them here and there. The sense almost is like people have invaded, and maybe there are things going on where the society is breaking down.

So I feel like, okay, it doesn’t feel as secure to stay where I am. I need to kind of strip my travel trailer down to its essentials, kind of close it up a bit, and move on. But now I’m kind of surrounded by these people who have come in to the space surrounding the travel trailer and into the little orchard right above it.

So, I’m kind of entertaining them, and they are acting like nomadic, but friendly. Everyone’s being friendly to me, but I don’t know now when I go to leave if I want to take my treasures with me. Are they going to try to rob them or not? 

I don’t know because they’re all relating to me in this friendly manner so far, but what does one do? So I kind of leave them a little bit, and I go to the area where I have the treasures and I’ve just taken one sack with me.

And so I’m going through there and I’m selecting what I think is really important, even though some of these things might not be important to other people, and I’m putting some of the jewelry and even just a simple skirt rather than a complex one, just one that will be easier to wear, and I’m putting it all in this sack. 

Some of it’s clothing, some of it’s jewelry, some of it’s old statues, and I’m trying to be fairly selective, not selective necessarily even on value, but just what do I actually really care or what should I take, and other times I just scoop up some stuff and throw it in.  

A couple of the ladies from the group come and they’re nearby me, and I’m just acting casual like no one would really care, but then it feels like when I put some things in the sack, then I look at them and I say, “Would you like me to show you some things that maybe you guys would like?” Because I realize I’m only going to take the sack with me. 

So, I ask them if they want me to show them some things because they’ll want those. I still don’t even know if the people are all going to let me take the sack when I leave, but I’ve got my sack of what I’ve gathered up, and now maybe I’ll show them where some of the things are to see if they need any of them.

John: So you’ve taken this dream and you’ve progressed it from the dream before where you’re trying to just relate to a particular part of yourself, without having to contend with, or deal with, this other stuff that you’re not so sure about, or you feel would compromise your relationship.

In this particular dream, you kind of go at this in a reverse way in that, similar to the first dream where you want to take a particular way of yourself to meet this other part of yourself, without there being some little mannerism in between, and you don’t want to relate to those mannerisms because you feel that that somehow or another compromises the relationship.

In this particular dream you now have taken your specific focus and specific use of energy and you have been able to move all of that in the condition that you’re in. You’re able to move that into another area that is still out in the open, that’s still not maybe necessarily the best place either, but at least it provides some cover.

And you’re able to spread out in that, with what it is that you carry and hold, in terms of a certain focus and attention that you’ve developed, so you’ve been able to spread that out a bit, and you consider that your treasures.

But the thing that this dream is telling you is, you cannot shut the world out like that. If you try to do that, it seems to have a way of clamoring back in on you anyway. And so what happens is, is  all of these people come. 

They’re the types, of course, that you wanted to be alone and off to yourself, and of course you’re developing an understanding and a focus. In other words, this dream is derivative to the first dream.

In the first dream you came to the conclusion, in terms of relating best to this person and part of yourself, is you didn’t need to get all indulged in a particular trait or mannerism, which was in the overall, or which was in the atmosphere.

In this particular dream you have pulled yourself away from the collective events and stuff that’s in the atmosphere and you are still couching yourself, hiding and being under a lean-to structure or whatever that’s out in the open. But you’re able to harbor or develop certain traits or qualities or treasures, so to speak, that you’re able to spread out with.

You are not allowed to get away with that, however, because you have now taken and put yourself into a vortex of aloneness that isn’t inclusive, and so all of these other people come pouring in on you, and move in around you.

Well, this is like a disturbance and you have to get out of there or go somewhere else because you’re disturbed, and at the same time you apparently are looking at yourself in terms of how you’re disturbed, in terms of what it is that you’re holding onto, and how it is that you came about being able to hold onto this.

That a lot of it has to do with a particular mannerism that you’ve adopted. But now, to hold onto that mannerism that you’ve adopted, in relationship to the way everybody else is, this almost is like… well, this puts you out on a limb.

If anything, this makes you so different that maybe it will have to try to affect it, or take it away, and so you come to the conclusion that you can’t go around carrying this attitude. You somehow or another realize that there’s an even greater openness that’s possible that integrates all of these parts of yourself – if you open up and if you figure out how to share it. 

Tomorrow we will delve deeper into this theme.

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Brimblecombe-Fox_K_Stillness Within_2010In John’s dream imagery, which faces the same issue as Jeane did in her dreams (see Flow and Reaction), the struggle is to maintain an inner quiet that is connected to the Wholeness of life, rather than succumb to personal reactions and mannerisms. Our patterns of personal reaction to events, in our outer life, close us off from the grace of creation. And in our dreams, those same types of reactions veil us from the guidance of our higher self, which is trying to awaken us. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: I don’t approach it quite that way. I’m coming more from a predilection of dwelling on things, and needing to pick up a greater Wholeness of what’s going on all around me – as if that’s what’s missing. I’m having to take what is specific, and recognize that there’s a greater answer in the overallness. 

Are either of them right? No, they’re just dimensions and levels that are quickened in our being, which occurs when one takes into account these aspects, both at an objective, and as a subjective, overallness, when you take them into account as what the whole equation needs to be.

In other words, you can’t be just one way or the other. You have to be both. It’s an unusual way of dreaming, but I think my dreaming might make it clearer because I go at it from a specific standpoint.

In the dream I start off with looking for an easy solution, as I probe an inner depth. And the easy solution is to deal with the situation in a particular way, which is fairly obvious on the surface. In other words, this is what you see. 

Once you’ve felt something for a while, and you do go to a certain depth inside, there’s the first obvious response that you experience. However, I am shown that this is inadequate, just settling there is now inadequate: I need to take on subtler and deeper depths of myself.

So as I go deeper into this feminine principle of accounting for a greater overallness, I actually stop a certain kind of doingness, or reaction action, because I find that doing what was obvious and apparent as a solution is not what you naturally reach to all the time.  

There’s a greater depth that doesn’t do that, because when I look at the overall, more expansive, levels within my approach, the opposite is what becomes apparent. The opposite is a quietness where you don’t respond or react to reactions or mannerisms, because at these levels I’m shown that I need to simply let go. 

That is the gracious answer to everything that is bothering me. It occurs when I touch a depth within, where having to do something has reverberations. This occurs when I reach the state where silence is the golden elixir. 

Until I do that, I’m inclined to still reach to an answer, in terms of how to deal with what is disturbing to me. In other words, until I reach that depth. In other words, I still have these feedbacks and responses that synaptically come up, and these responses are still in the realm of reactions.

And such reactions are not taking into account the greater overall depth of myself. The greater overall depth of myself takes in other inner levels where there is a Wholeness, and in doing so becomes quieter and quieter in terms of, then, reaction and response becomes more and more peculiar, because that interferes and disturbs the quieter and quieter mannerism. 

This dream where I see myself as having to take into account a situation in life where there is an obvious response that comes up where I notice how that is. In this dream I also notice that there is this other person, and that person is like a side of me that exists on more levels of beingness, who sees all of this from an opposite approach mannerism.

That this is an approach that goes beyond the obvious. And so in this dream, the obvious reaction response, which is seen as coming from a particular depth of myself, can be even quieter to which then reaction response goes silent or empty.

Seeing this greater overallness, with expansive other levels taken into account, stops me in my tracks. My action reaction has consequences for an awareness that takes into account this dimensionality. In other words, you maintain some actions and responses, feed on each other, and continue whatever motif you go off on as a tangent. It’s a spiraling.

So when I am experiencing this greater beingness inside myself, I sensate with an auric key, which adheres to a quietness. Upon this quietness every reaction response is seen as a karmic loudness. The inner depth of overallness that I am talking about is a beingness that is able to find the empty space within every situation.

The deeper meaning of this is, in a dream there is typically a response to that which is in movement from within, which is seeking to wake up. The movement is reflecting from an inner depth and a higher consciousness. The inflection carries a vibration that reaches a depth, and reaches a deeper note, which goes beyond what is readily apparent.

What is readily apparent is the inflection that has this motion action reaction upon it, or to it, as one’s inner depth level of one’s self. This tends to throw one around because the effect is noticeable. What isn’t noticeable is that this effect response is also able to be absorbed by a greater beingness that has an overallness that is rooted into and from an emptiness or quietness.

Each state we experience in a dream needs to be placed into such an emptiness, and that emptiness is the real station. To begin with we are swept up by the loudness of the state. Our reactions tend to be in the way, they get in the way, of a quietness. 

When we are able to take on an expansive station where the levels of our beingness do not need a doingness reaction response, that is when a greater auric sensation starts taking everything into account.

And that is when everything naturally bounces off of this greater auric field, that is, in effect, able to accept everything as being a flicker from out of a Wholeness, which is, in and of itself, empty and silent.

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