The process of development brings new things into our lives, yet also requires that we let go of other things. In this dream we see this struggle in the form of an arranged marriage, or coming together, and the fierce resistance to that. The personal view says: “I didn’t choose this marriage.” The universal view can only be: “Your destiny is to be wed to me.” And at each step of the way, there really is no going back. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
Jeane: Well in the dream I remember I’m a young woman in England, probably back in time a ways. My mother suddenly takes me one day over to the house of this nobleman I’m going to meet, and the reason I’m meeting him is I’m supposed to marry him – so I guess we’re staying at his house for a while so that we can meet, and then the marriage will happen. It’s not like there’s a lot of consulting me in this process.
Well, I have someone else that I’m interested in. It’s like you or something, so I keep sneaking out of the house. Sometimes when I sneak out of the house it’s like I remember I went to a lake. It’s like I just wanted to visit someplace, almost like where some firemen were.
Another time it’s like if I sneak out of the house to meet the guy I really like, and we go into the village, one of the scenes I remember more vividly is we seem to visit some of these buildings where in one I’m feeling a little chased. Maybe my mother or the nobleman’s out there after me to bring me back.
But when I go into this building it’s almost like this particular area of town is a replica, and maybe it’s even a replica of where famous crimes occurred, or murders, or something, because we’ve gone into the one guy’s building. He’s built some kind of machine that imitates a machine that gasses some people to death. Maybe people come and get a tour of this building and see where the famous murderer gassed people to death.
Well, you’re kind of totally interested with this machine. You kind of climbed up there next to the flames under the building looking at this machine that he invented that throws off gas, but I want you to get out of there because the gas could affect you, I think. You come over and show me a shirt you’ve invented that’s like a coverall with cuffs that aren’t affected by flame or something.
And then I think the nobleman and my mom catch up with us because sometimes you’re trying to pull me into doing something that maybe if I went with you, or did that, it would be irretrievable. And it feels like I’m afraid to completely do something that would break with my mom or the nobleman because, although I don’t want to go into this forced marriage or anything, I also kind of don’t want to disgrace them or something. So I’m in this kind of ambivalent state a lot, and sometimes running away, and sometimes going back.
John: The state you’re really in is that you don’t want to take on something that could be perhaps too much for yourself, so you hide, because the idea of the nobleman and that sort of thing running around is something that is of a nature. It speaks of something that needs to open up, that is able to open up, and is designed to open up.
Where the misalignment comes is seeing how all of that comes together in terms of a flow, a connective flow from top to bottom. Because, you’re right, there’s something that’s irretrievable when you catch up with something like that, which means you can’t go back and exercise your own ideas. You can’t go back and exercise your own ideas that are personal, in terms of how you want something to happen, but the dilemma that you have is you’re not noticing that the ideas that you have in relationship to that which is designed to open up, that it’s meant to be able to come together.
Like I say, your dream has this quality where you have these two component parts that you’re kind of juggling back and forth as to whether you want to support one or the other, as if they’re two different things. The one being like the nobleman that has an access and a means about him to something, and the other being an energetic that has access and has connected to something that, once it is done, it is irretrievable. And you don’t realize that there’s like an amnesia between the two states, but when you pull them together they are actually one and the same.
And so when you don’t pull that together, you go out and it’s a little bit like going out into the fire. You run into the fireman. You go away from this quality. And what you’re basically describing when you’re going away from this quality is something that surprised and shocked me. It’s as if you are not willing to help facilitate this waking up, this deeper depth inside of yourself that’s beckoning to come through, because you act as if it exposes you, or is too much.
So what it is, is you’re not seeing what you’re working with. You’re not seeing it as correctly as you should be able to see that, because the nobleman carries a characteristic, an essential characteristic and quality that your feminine nature understands. And then what you’re working with also carries that, but you don’t see how the two come together.
There is something that has created a shock, and you’ve moved that shock from what would be pulled together all as one fell swoop, as the nobleman and me are one, you move that shock aspect almost over to me to where you’re using that to create a means of stepping back, or looking at it as too much. Because the consequence, in terms of just with me, is irretrievable.
Well, you still have your options and your choices retained, so how can that be necessarily true unless you pull the whole nobleman quality into it, too, to where you hear all of that along with all of your feminine balanced nature? And then when you see it in that light, then irretrievable is not necessarily a bad thing. But when it’s disjointed like this, it is too much. You’re not able to see how it’s in accordance with how you really want to be. Isn’t that an interesting dream?
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