The Semi in the Room

bncmurewyiPersonal and spiritual development doesn’t require that we resolve everything within us that isn’t “holy.” But it does ask that we come to know ourselves, or face the psychologies we use that don’t support our choice of a spiritual journey. In other words, we need the awareness of what is working within us, and sometimes awareness alone can get us on the path of neutralizing any negative effects. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In my dreams I seem to be doing a lot of that same sort of thing in which I first of all am denoting how the overall flow was not received by the outer world and, as a result, I’m scrambling to find or figure out a type of unfoldment that will be acceptable.

In other words, what I have is two images, one in which there’s the great big expanse and overallness of things in which there’s a lot of collective, and people and everything, and that’s really out of whack. And so because that’s so out of whack, it’s like I’m trying to scramble around to something else that might be acceptable.

And so I turn my attention to kind of a personal, now, in other words, an alternative energetic, and I feel that I can bring that into the equation in some fashion. But the appearance and effect of the outer stimuli is so overwhelming, comparatively speaking, that I notice that my demeanor is influenced by that, in terms of what could happen in relationship to what is happening in the collective overall – so it is effecting me.

So I notice that I went with the overall flow a little bit by siding with the image to a certain degree that then carried the contamination of the collective that was overwhelming as it was unfolding. In other words, I took a step back from the collective but it was still in something that is a personal overwhelming that is putting me into a weakened condition.

And as a consequence from this dream you can gain an appreciation to cater that which satisfies your individual focus, first and foremost, that is very hard to do because to what degree is that contaminated. You can’t stay in the collective, but then whatever you formulate in relationship to the collective around you is still trying to satisfy your individual nature. In other words, it has a personal orientation.

So to act according to this individualistic positioning is to embrace that which is being projected by the outer that’s in a state of decline. The consequence of that is rubbing off on you, the collective force is rubbing off on you, and they are to such a degree that the tendency on a personal level is to fumble back to what you hope is a balance, but you’re actually still part of that same general issue.

So there’s a loudness in that personal that’s affected by the collective, but then as the night progresses the image of that which is affected, or personal, in the prior dream that’s having to react to the environment around it, or have a reaction, starts to shrink more and more. Eventually it’s at a size that is hardly visible.

So as this has changed then the issue then also becomes addressed in a dream in which I am in a work area and am dealing with that which has been abandoned by me, that needs to be put away.

Now at first I don’t notice this, all I notice is I’m in a work area and I felt I’ve done what I needed to do, and in this huge large yard work area is all kinds of things that are kind of lined up and placed there. And I went at it little by little taking care of things, but there was one thing that I left feeling I didn’t have to take care of – and I even blanked it out of my mind.

And this one thing is a large, unloaded semi-truck that sits in the lineup yet with these other objects. It’s gotten to the point I can’t get to it anymore and I have adopted the perspective that this which remains is somebody else’s responsibility. In other words, I no longer even see it as something that I have to contend with. And a work area has been filled up with, because I dealt with my stuff, the work area is now filled up with other objects and my attention of course is moved from that.

Suddenly I see a crane which lifts this semi from where it is parked amidst these other items and is airlifting and swinging this over to where I am at so that I finish the work.

So what is happening is, the difference in the dreaming, the aspect that’s being brought in, is that what you’re putting your attention upon is secondary to that which is real inside that is trying to come through.

And in my dream, because one is always having to sort out thoughts and ideas, I have conveniently let go of, or released, or taken my focus away from a certain attentiveness of thought of the process of action to the point where I’m actually convinced that it’s no longer at hand, and yet it is still something that, at a deeper depth inside, has to be contended or dealt with, that fits with what my nature is really all about – and I can’t get away from it.

In my particular case, because I’m off the ground with thoughts and nature and whatnot, I’m trying to just let it go, and I can’t just let it go because it has to be grounded or brought down into a magnetic focus.

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A Karmic Debt

mandala_karma_buddhism_eternal_knotJohn describes two dreams that bring up the issue of karmic debt. The concept of this is that the gift of life must be paid for through personal development, as a service into the greater Whole. Once that debt has been paid, an individual is free to progress into new possibilities, at a higher octave of life. That is the progression possible for every human life. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In the first dream, I start off trying to explain the reasoning behind the way something is, in other words why it’s like that. There’s the apparent obviousness that you see in the outer, but then there’s a reason behind the obviousness of the outer

And I point out that if you take and expend a certain sum upon the situation, in other words, as if you are dealing with the situation straight up as you think you see it, that in doing so, you have to go up to a particular point or amount before the monies that are expended work off an indebtedness that acts as an override to the situation, that influences or affects the situation. 

You’re not inclined to see that if you look at it just literally. You’re inclined to see a certain situation in front of you. You don’t see what is behind that situation, and why that situation is what it is. And so somehow I have a sense of something more, and then there’s this other person who’s standing there, who’s having a hard time understanding that there is something more or that there is a deeper principle, because he just looks and is able to see what’s literally in front of him. 

In other words, he’s taking the situation and its obviousness, and can’t see that other behind the scenes. And so I explain to him that the situation behind the scenes, the indebtedness that is dictating, and until this issue is met, those who are obvious in this operation before me can’t directly benefit. 

They’re controlled by the effect of something preexisting, which even though they are active and out front in their appearance, it’s that something behind the scenes that is in control. In other words, that has to be satisfied first. 

I’m explaining how this works, the formula for doing this. I point out that if a certain sum of money comes in, in terms of what this little scenario is, sitting there looking like it’s amenable to having energetics thrown in its direction that, as the monies come in, the gross profit has like a 40% margin. 

In other words, there is a 40% margin to hit the gross profit of the general sales, and that before anything is able to go into the pocket, or the control, or the availability of the proprietor there, that this 40% of the gross sales needs to exceed whatever this particular indebtedness dollar amount is. 

And it totals a certain amount, and until that amount is reached, only then does the amounts expended over and above that accrue to the proprietor – the debt holder, so to speak, whom you don’t tend to notice because they’re not active, they’re dormant in their role, or appear to be dormant in the role, but have an overriding effect upon what is able to transpire predominate or, so to speak, have to be dealt with first. That’s the first dream 

In the next dream, I’m showing a person… so, what I do is I interpret both dreams, because I first of all had to pull out the second dream, and I just have to trust that the second dream will be adding or fitting in, even though it looks entirely different, adding information or fitting in in some capacity with the first dream. 

So, in the next dream I’m showing a person a commercial area that exists; it’s at night. It’s kind of in a restaurant at night in the back area. In other words, it’s night so the place is currently closed. There’s no one there. There’s just me coming into this back kitchen area that is closed to the public because it is after hours.

And this is a person who actually already knows a lot about food preparation and food service and such, so I feel that he could appreciate or get a kick out of the way things work in this place. And so I feel that I can show him the best thing on the market for cooking food or at least keeping it hot for later, when it’s time to be served. 

This oven just has an automatic feature about it that does this, and so it doesn’t have to be attended. It just automatically does this. And so I describe this stove as a Subzero stove. Of course that also applies to the best refrigerator on the market, but it’s also a term in my dream that applies to this unique and top-of-the-line stove. 

The way the stove works is, the very top will slide open to where it reveals, at a depth inside, naturally built into this stove is like an internal pot – and there are a couple of them. And in the internal pot is food that is there when it’s time to serve it, readily available. 

There are the potatoes, and there’s the gravy, plus another food item there that are already hot, and of course this pot itself is part of the oven, and the food that’s there is ready to be served when it’s time to serve the food. 

All that’s necessary is just when the top slides open like it can do, is to reach down there and scoop it out. And when you’re done, the top closes back over and it sits in this state in which it can always be reached when needed, because the food is now being kept like this around the clock.

The meaning of the dreams is, the first dream is describing a karma debt and condition that predominates over a situation. Before there can be a benefit or, in other words, before anything unique or different or unfolding can happen, this debt needs to be paid in full first, or absolved first.

In other words, the proprietor or the direct involvement in the situation is all for naught, and is spinning its wheels, because something deeper has to be reached. And that is what makes sense; the actions that we take as all so important actually go nowhere.

They’re precursors to reaching this something more. In other words, they’re the working off of a karma or a debt. However, that’s not how people tend to see things. The casual observer only sees the direct situation and assumes that that’s what they have to contend with, and that that’s all that there is.

However, a person who is conscious of the soul, and the experiences it needs to reach somewhere where there isn’t the underlying items or indebtedness, that a person has to acknowledge that this indebtedness controls what happens or, in other words, the karmic obligations stand in the way – and they vary from person to person. 

Until what is in the way is resolved, nothing goes forward.

The second dream takes the issue further. A preparation process is involved. Preparatory process is what is being revealed when the preparation to get to a particular point in the kitchen has been met, i.e., in other words the food has been prepared, the items have been taken from the refrigerator or whatever, which again would be top-of-the-line, into this amazing stove where everything is kept ready to go.

It’s already cooked. There’s no need to try to mix the ingredients anymore. It’s all that remains is the time when what is prepared is able to be served. And what I’m seeing, we aren’t at that time – so we wait. 

The situation that exists can be explained in detail to another person who’s interested in the process, but that is all. This other person may be able to appreciate the effort and careful planning and amazing process in which only the best is used to reach the stage, but it sits dormant, it sits waiting.

When the timing is right, the food can be scooped out and served. I can see in my mind’s eye, as if I have a connection to that which is yet to happen, that when it is time to serve the already prepared meal, my question will be: Do you want this with or without gravy over everything?

Because then there are the potatoes, and in another place is gravy, and then there’s another item being cooked in there that I don’t look at. And so this is a perception outside of the moment in which a grace from deep within is seen as affecting and covering everything that happens.

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Keeping It Together

alchemical_cosmosFollowing on from yesterday’s post (see Being True to One’s Self), the imagery continues to plunge Jeane into a kind of chaos or mayhem. The purpose of such images is to demonstrate the need to hold the inner connection no matter what happens. Easier said than done, of course, but the struggle to maintain our connections to our higher self is a fundamental process on the spiritual path. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: The next scene it feels like I’ve ridden with Dad downtown, but he gets going pretty fast and there’s a lot of snow, and he kind of goes up on the side of a hill of snow that’s been piled there.

So I pop up out of the car and I end up on the top of the snow, maybe slide down, and Dad’s gone on. He hasn’t quite noticed that I popped out of the car, so he’s gone on down around the corner.

I go looking for him, but I’m not sure where he’s gone. You know, I go around the service station and then it feels like I go to the event that we’re all going to, which is maybe at a church where they’re serving food and again there are a lot of people.

When I get there I tuck my purse around this little corner into a little cupboard, so then I can go on about, noticing the food they’re gathering and all the people that are around. And then I seem to go across the street and my sister and my niece and some other people are at a restaurant, and I look at what they’re being served.

Meanwhile, it feels like Dad has taken off. He’s forgotten he’s supposed to give me a ride back home. I’ve gone over to this building that’s actually like a treatment center building. I’ve gone to look in there, and I remember I’m standing between two elevators. And the elevator doors open and there are two people on one side, and there are some doctors talking right by me that had come out of a room. They’ve opened up a door and I can see the people in there must be getting detoxed or something because I can smell a whiff of marijuana or something and there are some people on the floor.

That must be where people come in when they need to get detoxed. The doctors have left and I’m not sure which elevator to take, the one on the right, or the one on the left? Well, then one on the left arrives first and I get in. There’s just one person in there, and I push the button.

The elevator does this very weird trip up. You feel like it actually is going, I don’t know, not in a straight line but it does kind of a swirl going up. It goes way up to like the ninth floor or something.

Then the door opens and the gal gets out that I realized must have been a patient. She was even lying on the floor when she talked with me. And so goes in somewhere and I look around. Maybe I even talk to some people on that floor.

For some reason I feel like I have my purse, or my phone, or something with me, and she took it, so I look and there may even be an exit on the ninth floor, but I realize I need to go back down to the ground floor.

Even though I’m dubious about it, I think I take the same elevator down. I’m looking around to see if I can do something about locating my purse, because even though she took something, I remember that I’d actually put the purse behind a cupboard, so I went and I found that.

And then it felt like I’ve lost my phone, but then I find my phone in my pocket and I go to see where my sister was at the restaurant and I realize they’d eaten these kind of interesting salads and I have phoned my niece or my dad to come and pick me up again from the house, but I decided before I go there I’m going to take one of these salads up with me and I’m having someone prepare that salad, I think, before I leave.

John: The dream has all kinds of things that have to be sorted out, to try to bring them into some sort of focus. So, the whole thing has to do, again, with discrimination, and how you place your energy and your attention in terms of your overall center of gravity to things.

And maybe the best way of describing it is that you have to have your attention in such a way so that it doesn’t get bifurcated by this, that, and the other around you. And the purpose of a dream like this is to get you to recognize that you actually have to hold on and feel the vibration – and not lose that vibration – as you go about and you do things. Otherwise you end up identifying with the activities that you’re doing.
And when you end up identifying with the activities that you do, then you don’t do other things that you would ordinarily be able to do, and would kind of do, as mannerisms and actions and conduct that you still feel you have a responsibility towards.

So what you’re doing is you’re talking about multiple levels of veiling yourself. In other words, it starts off where you have a responsibility towards your dad in some sense. The fact that you are putting your focus towards a responsibility towards your dad, is also a deviation or bifurcation of the energy from a greater vibration of an overallness that you can feel.

But you choose to do that. You choose to take on that responsibility even though it is a bifurcation from the one singular note or whatever that you could be experiencing.

You then go into further deviations of yourself when you have all of this other activity and mayhem going on, which then occupies and takes up your attention. So that now, even your responsibility towards your dad is turned into another kind of mayhem, because all of this other veils you again, and gets in the road in terms of grabbing your attention, so that whatever was important about how you are aiming your overall focus of beingness, has gotten disarrayed yet again.

What you are dealing with, what the purpose of the dream is doing, is healing you on an energetic level, in terms of the fact that you are seeing, as you’re dreaming, you having this overall quality of your nature that is getting diffused by not being able to hold onto something that keeps it stabilized in terms of what is important.

You’re in a human body, so you’re going to be aiming your attention in an overall sense, in some fashion or another. But you just need to take note on how that comes with a price. And in your particular case, you started with something that for all intents and purposes, in terms of evaluating things, you would say, okay, this is important to me in terms of how I have my overall attention.

But you weren’t able to sustain or maintain that very well because you allowed yourself to be noodled out even further by other little things that were going on, until eventually you’re so diffused that the importance and meaningfulness of how you’re using your overall vibration has gotten dissipated and, as a consequence, your ability to correlate and relate to yourself is getting lost – with each phase.

In other words, because you feel a linkage and a connection to your father, the use of energy in that particular way still can have a way of enhancing or feeding and is not that far astray so that you can’t do both. In other words, it is like the expression, “Head in the clouds and feet on the ground.” But feet on the ground in what regard?

You still have to have the head in the heavens so to speak, or the linkage and connection to something that you know is important that, as you function in life so that you don’t end up all dissipated.

The dream also is a precursor to developing a skill set for magic and changing things. And as the teacher would say, most people can’t really do much damage because their energetic is not refined to the point where it focuses upon being able to shift or to change things. And you had your focus deviated off to one side more than you realized.

And you can monitor all of this. In other words, you feel this, but you’re doing it in an overall way. I look at it specifically, but you have to look at it overall. How is it that you are able to carry the overall and at the same time maintain that connection?

It is a little bit how seed thoughts work. You can have a singular thought that seems harmless in and of itself, that can rise up from the ethers inside you and be fairly attenuated and close to you holding a center with yourself. But then as you start to entertain the thought, the danger, in terms of discrimination, is then that thought leads to this, this, and that and that and that, and pretty soon you’ve lost track of the original place that you started from.

A person that is really diffuse can’t even carry and hold and maintain a conversation. They just drift every which way, they flip flop every which way, because they’re not being true to some listening center inside of them.

What you’re doing is you’ve created this whole slide, energetic slide down, and actually this is a step back. What you’re doing is a step back in order to see how something goes forward. What you’re doing is actually going backwards inside yourself. You actually know better than this, but you’re revisiting it as if it is an old dormant pattern in your nature.

You’re revisiting it so that you can then see, “Well this is why I no longer do it this way. I do know where I want to place my attention.” But it’s useful to see how you look when you get completely diffuse, so that you can realize and recognize that when you do place your attention, however you do that in an overall area of responsibility, that you are making a sacrifice. It does run you full-fledged into sacrificing.

In other words, there is a way of holding yourself in an overallness that does nothing, but we don’t live in a world that does nothing. We live in a world in the outer and you then have to somehow do both. You have to maintain both places.

If you don’t maintain both places, then the value and the orientation that has the discriminating feature inside of you, which is that vibration, gets diffused to the point where all kinds of mayhem occurs around you.

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