The Sideshow

spiritual-transfiguration-1There is our spiritual life, and there is the life we lead in the outer world. But they are not separate. In fact, you could say that we’re not truly being spiritual if we still have a separation between these aspects of ourselves. Spirituality should come from our inner location into all that we do in the outer world. It isn’t meant to be turned on and off. Our journey may find us stopping and starting at first, but over time, and repetition, it can become who we are. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In my meditation dream I start off by looking at the underlying responsibilities I carry from being here in creation and dealing with the outer. There is a role that I play, but at the same time there is an outer orientation that I must also contend with that is part of the process.

In other words, by outer orientation I mean an overall orientation that is part of the wholeness in the larger expanse of the soul. And then there is a role that I play which is the identity that I carry in terms of how I see myself and what I do on a day-to-day basis. The role I play takes up my attention and when I’m condensed in that attention, this otherness that has the heart kind of stretching out, I steal from that as if I can make that an abstraction. I steal the energy from that to try to get away with focusing my attention upon some role that I play and that chokes me off from how it is that I need to experience.

I tend to look at my overall expanse as part of a role, which is a misnomer on my part. What it takes to be here is an unavoidable factor which permeates into the overall of manifestation. In other words, what I’m trying to say is that when I take and follow a mannerism or expression or a role, I am keeping myself from taking on the whole essence of a soul that can expand into the universe, into all of manifestation, and take it in as a quality of something that like I described earlier is outside of time and space. The weight and the pressure and the limiting choking off sensation of time that time has that keeps you from being able to experience the full essence of your beingness.

So to keep that from happening for me what I see myself doing is being busy being how I feel I am meant to be. In other words, whatever it is that I see is my role in life, and so I tend to ignore the overall aspect which is part of who I am as the territory of it all, thus in terms of being here I am experiencing a very small quality and quantity and spatiality of that because I have veiled myself from the greater information. And of course information is all caught in light, and you cannot catch up with light if you have choked your heart off in some way because you veil some aspect of that information that is imbedded in the light just by having choked your heart off and you do not even know it because nothing shows you or tells you other than the fact that your heart isn’t right.

Basically what I am trying to say is I am seeing in the meditation dream this mannerism, in other words this overallness mannerism of the heart is what is most important to manifestation, and not the role I play as a side game that I pretend to be of monumental importance. And I fill myself with spiritual illusion by saying it’s intertwined into the overallness. It’s accommodated but it is not really actually intertwined when I’m finding it choking my heart.

The meditation dream is pointing out to me that if on an energetic level I am not taking into account the overallness of my being that permeates naturally throughout manifestation with its demeanor… based upon a demeanor and attitude I carry that is choking the heart. Instead, my attention is upon the so called role I play that is being treated in the meditation as the sideshow to it all. In the meditation I saw it like that. I would see that as an inconsequential event, and then there would be this other and it was like really, really hard to focus on this inconsequential event when this otherness was so much the big deal.

It is how I am carrying my inner connection to the overallness that permeates into manifestation, which is what I am seeing to be important in the meditation dream. I am seeing that what I am doing is dismissing it as uneventful when it’s paramount. I am dismissing it as uneventful in order to do the things that I do. It is my so-called self imposed roles, or way that I see myself, in terms of what I think that I have to do and contend with, that I dwell upon and of course from what I’m seeing inside not only is this of little overall consequence in the scheme of the whole, it tends to preoccupy my attention away from how it is that I can truly feel the heart.

So in terms of an all inclusive overall vibration, which permeates into manifestation, this is what is being looked at from the perspective of the world soul, in other words, my connection out to the overall soul. It funnels or I am connected through that and so it looks into all of manifestation. In other words, I’m the soul, I am the complete blueprint of the world soul, not some role or identity I play in it all as a self-styled nuance. Until I had this dream I was not putting much of a focus upon this attribute or quality of my wholeness. Consequently, my contribution as a vibration going into the outer has been mostly unconscious and irresponsible. I need to take note of this all inclusive vibratoriness that, as I pointed out above, effuses into the outer as a natural byproduct of my presence in creation.

The dream is indicating that this is what is important. In other words, this is happening anyway to some degree, but it’s not on the level of attention. It’s kind of a byproduct as I play the role and to the degree to which I get all consumed by that role is the degree to which I’m rude to the overallness and taking liberties for the sake of trying to make whatever it is that I’m doing happen, and you don’t even note that you are stabbing your heart and stabbing your heart to the point where you can get to where you can’t see a darn thing in terms of functionality in the whole.

So the dream is indicating that what is important to the whole, which isn’t my ideas, and the price and cost of this overallness I… In other words, I’m seeing the price and cost to this overallness when I treat something to be extraneous to the process and try to scope it out separately. I need to stop acting like the day-to-day process of being here is extraneous and start looking at my day-to-day demeanor and note the all effusive presence maintained by this in creation.

See, you don’t notice it. In my dreams last night I did not notice this. I barely saw it. So, as I take this into account I am embarrassed in catching up with the memo from within instead of from without. I am embarrassed because I have been placing my attention upon extraneous role model conduct thinking this to be what is important, when the whole time how it is that I was carrying myself energetically is where it is at.

In other words, behind the scenes of all of that is how I’m carrying myself energetically. That’s what is important, and that is where my consciousness needs to dwell. Or, to say it in another way, the overall outer demeanor is not dismissible as if this is nothing more than a utility bill treated as an inconvenience, in other words where overallness is an inconvenience. It is instead key to the all effusive energetic I hold in manifestation. I need to pay attention to the demeanor I have in this regard as being the imperative.

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Realizing the Potential

Jeane: I had a long dream that was very detailed and had dialogue, but this is all I was able to pull out.

I’m in our space in Las Vegas (at least that’s my impression), except it seems larger. It has large windows with the light coming in. I’m pulling energy down and through that space and it’s going out into an adjoining space.

As I pull the energy through, it seems like it’s mostly in the colors of black and gold. I’m shaping it into little crescent-shaped boats. Then, one or two people can get into the boats and sail them on a narrow little river that seems to run through the (outer) space.

I seem to be talking with people about how they can shape their own boats. However, I realize that what we’re doing with the energy (as I return to the inner space of the apartment) is somewhat more than what’s being done with the boats. But I’m trying to facilitate that, too.

Simultaneously I have the impression that I’m pulling something down and curving it into a shape, while another part of me is also going perpendicular to it, and going out into a greater space, where I can’t really grasp yet what I’m drawn there to do.

John: It’s a similar conundrum to my dream (see A Catch-22), in that you have a sense of something that you’re trying to facilitate that involves this space, but what’s different about it is that you also have the sense that you’re supporting it in some fashion.

What’s important to realize is that support also comes from aspects that are in the space already – that are natural to that space. Because whatever it is that you are attempting to do, you somehow believe that it works or makes sense in relationship to the space that you’re in.

In other words, you’re trying to bring something through and that something is part of a latent intent already within that space. So in a roundabout way, you’re not in opposition to the atmosphere you find yourself in, you’re in harmony with it.

The idea is to figure out how we’re supposed to be in a (any) space, and how our presence can enhance the space and make more possible in terms of its evolution. That is part of the work of human beings.

In other words, we’re not meant to go into a space and change it to something different than it is. That’s just as true energetically as it is physically. If we look at this planet, we can see than man has imposed himself on the earth, rather than living in harmony with it.

Yet every space, or the space of every moment, is filled with energetic potential, and humans are designed to bring that potential through – to help it become realized.

It’s in that way that humans can become realized themselves. Anything else can be seen as a violation of the space. Of course it doesn’t mean we can’t change anything, it just requires sensitivity to what is already at play within a given space (physical or energetic), and then working with that.

So, this dream shows that you’re taking the space that’s presented to you, which has a certain quality to it already, and you’re working with that space in a way that supports what that space would like itself to be. Perhaps it’s lacking something or it needs more support or help in order for it to become something more. Because you are connected to it, you can become the agent for its evolution.

So you become a facilitator, and you’re doing it energetically and vibrationally. You’re not doing anything that contradicts the atmosphere that already exists. That’s only possible when you don’t add what is personal from you into the energy of the space. You are a conduit, only responding to the energetic needs of the space – without personal biases, patterns, judgments, or expectations.

This describes a state of openness and acceptance for the “way things are.” From that point forward you can become an agent of enhancement, helping the space itself to become more potent.

Beneath the Skin

John: I keep dreaming that there is a dominant, inner expression that dictates the outer life. This is an influence that is familiar, deep within my natural frame of reference. However, the loudness of everything else – the superficial – drowns out this effect over the short run. 

So this influence silently dictates the overall way things unfold, even though it’s not readily apparent in the outer.

In one image, I see this inner expression represented as a skeletal frame that holds things together. The outer features are what I notice at first, and am apt to be swayed by – like the skin and the flesh on this frame – on a moment-by-moment basis. As a result, the controlling feature in life (the inner expression) takes a backseat to everything else in the outer environment. Or so it seems, even though in the long run the skeletal backbone to life is what ultimately wins out.

In other words, what I saw is this skeletal structure, and it comes all the way down to the ground. So there’s something about the structure that makes an energetic connection to everything that’s rooted in creation. Then the shell, the body, the flesh, and the skin on it is what people pay attention to, it’s what they see, so they’re not aware that there is an aliveness to the structure that actually dictates what is meant to be and how things are to unfold.  

Everyone is paying attention to what is more apparent or obvious, i.e., the denser, outer layer, which is just the wrapper, or the exterior of the skeletal structure. So people base their choices and actions according to appearances, because that’s the easiest to sense and to see.

In other words, the invisible skeletal structure carries the energetic or vibration of what’s meant to be, not the skin and the flesh and everything else that’s visible. But it’s the outer, visible layer that has a loudness that captures the senses, and draws everyone’s attention.

Of course, in the long run, what wins out, in terms of what is meant to be, is determined by the skeletal structure.

Isn’t that a strange image?

So in this dream I feel fortunate in knowing what is actually affecting what manifests in the outer. It’s a wonderful feeling of relief to know that there is inner guidance, determined or destined to come to the forefront of my being.

First of all, I sense this in a fairly general way, but then I realize that my attention is drawn more to the skeletal structure than it is to the outer layers. I do not readily grasp this.

I can feel it and I can know it, but I lose sight of this knowing when I’m caught up in some situation that requires my immediate attention. Even then, when I’m unable to hold onto an inner balance, I’m comforted in a subconscious way with knowing that there is the essence of what is meant to be, like it’s waiting for me to go there, to look there.

In the dream, because I’ve made the choice to have the inner framework to life dictate how I’m meant to live, even my mistakes and detours are simply guided and shaped into what is intended. I find that amazing.

In other words, as I fumble about it’s almost like something else is directing me because whatever I’m doing is being transformed somehow. It’s affected. Sometimes I suffer when this happens, but at other times my input is redirected and guided to bring out the intended inner effect.

I come to know and trust this inner expression, even though it’s not visible; for me it is just as real as what is visible. What is visible in the outer is there for appearances only. I’ve become able to see the deeper thread of things, beyond the noisy surface.

This cannot be said, however, for my coarser nature that is still dominated by the appearances of the outer world, fed only by the physical senses.

What I’m describing is a subtle awakening, of my consciousness, to that which lies deep within my nature. It gives me joy each time I’m able to break through the outer barriers and be touched by this inner essence, which waits patiently for me to attune myself to its existence at the core of my being.