A Counterbalance

November 10, 2014November 10, 2014 ~ d2k ~ Leave a comment

The “dreamed” state was discussed in our last post (see The Dreamed State), and here John continues his exploration – from a masculine perspective in this imagery. What is being shown is that there is no way forward without a balance between masculine and feminine. It’s as true in our inner lives as it is in our dream lives as it is in our waking lives. God and creation have built everything in a state of balance. Could the future of man hold out any other possibility? Particularly if man wants to be an agent of God on this planet. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In my meditation dream, the first thing I had to make note of was that from the way I have been living I have gained an appreciation for life and, as a result, I am seeing more balance and enjoyability in terms of how things are, overall, when there is the inclusion of feminine nature, or the feminine aspect. In other words, basically being able to be content with things in the outer.

In other words, what I’m doing is the step of taking the dreamtime into the outer. But I realize that the energetic cadence, which comes from outer reflections, when you approach it through the dreamtime is easier to handle when the flow embedded therein – you just embrace it. In other words, you don’t just see it as a nightmare, or as a peculiarity, or something. It’s meaningful in terms of trying to bring something to you as a quality that you carry through – and we each carry something through.

Now, we’re brought up to understand life as if it exists through our senses but, on a deeper level inside of ourself, our higher-self level, the self that is the three-million-year-old man, it’s brought up to understand life as existing in this dreamtime. This is how you shape and you change things.

And so this is the state that I recalled deep inside of myself, but I find myself instead in a place where things are in disarray and need to be put back together again. This is a place in which the predilection in terms of how you contend with things is based upon yielding to masculine conceptualizations and impressions, ideas, and so called flow.

So much is this so, that there is a general rule that lords itself over everyone and everything, so the conditions are actually so unbalanced that when it comes to dealing with life, the powers that be impose their conceptual way.

In the dream it is okay to look… in other words, it is deemed to be okay. In other words, this isn’t really true because the feminine is excluded in this kind of world. In other words, part of my three-million-year-old man looking at something in a capacity only. It’s okay to look at the masculine ideas to get things going again, in other words, that’s where the conceptualization exists.

I have found that inside that coincides with how things are in terms of idealization in the outer, but I am acting more in keeping with what feels right, in other words the deeper part inside of the dream body. This dreamtime state goes through the same phases, the same steps as you go through, it’s a shift, and you go through the same stages and the same steps that you go through when you’re just dealing in a dense outer capacity way.

But then when you start to contend with the light body, or the dream body, then you go through this same sense, too, in terms of how it gets polished and directed. And so within your dream you carried the essence of something that will keep you held back, but it’s still a dreamtime that you have to contend with.

Within my dream, I dreamt how I’m having to contend with this in a masculine-oriented dream, the outer being a dream, and I’m carrying a dreamed connection that knows it to be different, able to be different.

So I’m able to act more in keeping with what feels right and, in doing so, just without even thinking I pick up two objects that are deemed to have a feminine orientation. I am immediately reprimanded. I am told that it is only because we are in creation an exception can be made, or is possible, and I’m able to take one feminine aspect, but I also have to take one masculine aspect.

I could have, in other words, taken two masculine aspects, but the fact that I picked up two feminine aspects, well, they can let me have one, as long as I bring one masculine element to the table.

Well the deeper importance of dreaming like this is, it’s putting me in the condition, like it did for you, of waking up embodying an aspect of what that all feels like as a dreamed condition. So I wake up trying to not lose the space that I am able to resonate with, which as a flow has the ability to show, or catch up with, or shift into a greater appreciation of life.

In other words, I have found that in the dreamed. I am not taking and going with the motif that exists in the outer of shifting in more masculine. That doesn’t work. I’m shifting in more of the feminine to counterbalance it because the feminine holds the dream state; it doesn’t just float in spirit energy.

So I’m confronted with the masculine tone of things as still trying to impose their precedence today, and I’m recognizing that what is necessary, in order for life to be more natural in the outer, is the inner experience, which of course I’ve already said this before but this is the part that is in the dreamed state of one’s being, or what some call the dreamtime.

It is one thing to relate to the dream and the dreamer, but to live what one experiences as states that become like more towards a station of how you carry yourself and aren’t affected by outer conditions then, that’s more like a station, that is where the dreamed or dreamtime is sustained, or held.

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Trusting in the Order of Things

February 28, 2013February 28, 2013 ~ d2k ~ Leave a comment

$fractals4$ Today’s discussion continues from John’s dream yesterday (see It’s in the Details). When it comes to balancing the overall perspective of the feminine, with the detail perspective of the masculine – within each of us – it comes down to trust. Trust creates the space for things to unfold naturally. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: In other words, if I’m able to put together a system and a process that flows, and this is very, very difficult and this is a problem that always exists when you have to function like this, is that you’re always rolling things around to see if you have it right.

And the problem with rolling things around to see if you have it right is, you can easily get caught up in the detail and screw up, because it’s important to also feel the overallness of what is right in the Whole, which is that feminine quality.

The masculine is that intangible fourth element that makes how something is to be felt and carried in the Whole. It’s what makes it complete. It’s what makes it secure. It’s what makes it safe. It’s what makes it balanced.

The feminine carries the overall vibration that everybody can abide in and be in, but the masculine is what safeguards it and makes it okay, makes it so that it’s sustainable. And what I’m seeing is not sustainable, and it may be okay now, but I know that it won’t be in the future.

I know that this is a latent problem, and I’m not sure what to do about it. I haven’t solved it, and of course I also know that the problem with solving it has to do with somehow or another being able to step back from it, too.

In other words, this is tricky because you have to make huge shifts too, so you can’t get too caught up in the way something has a sense of overall feel to it. You can’t get too caught up in that, because you have to be cognizant of how this little thing can distort, or disrupt, or change the overallness – even though it hasn’t done that yet.

There are two approaches when something is like this. One is to approach it gradually and try to reshape it, and the other is to abruptly throw it out and do a complete about face, and such a shift is very, very hard on things, to do an abrupt shift like that. That’s like the wrath of God or something, when something just gets completely hit with the eraser and redone, and snapped into something, because as it has been patty-caked together it’s too amorphic, sometimes it has too many little this and a little that, and therefore it’s become dysfunctional.

The purpose is to somehow or another be able to work with what there is to work with, and evoke the changes that need to be evoked and stay within an unfoldment, an unfoldment that the feminine holds and maintains and sustains.

The alternative to that is very abrupt, and it takes and just immediately does something where it can just take and rewrite the whole story. It can just reorient the whole thing just to fix something that is contaminated, contaminated to the point that where you see that that contamination is going to create an abomination.

So if you take and you just jump up and you rewrite the whole thing, you feel very guilty. You feel almost as if you’ve let something down. You feel like you can’t look people in the eye because what you’ve done is very much disturbing to the social fabric and order of things, well intended, but even more dangerous.

Because when you do something like that, people don’t have the useful semblances that they need to lean on as crutches, and you’ve jerked those out from under them, too, if you throw this whole thing into a complete flip.

And so you have this dilemma because, does it need to be a complete flip, or can this be gradually and subtly changed. And the grace of something involves the subtle change, or the grace and mercy of something involves the subtle change.

The awe and majesty of something involves the raw energy that takes and hits something so abruptly that it can be extremely disruptive to the fabric of things because, although intended to make something better, how are things able to cope with it?

Now, sometimes that has to be however, because if you’re running out of rope in terms of being able to sustain and maintain an overallness, and that overallness is important, and the overallness is carried by the feminine, and the masculine can see where the points are where it’s not protected, or not going to sustain and maintain itself, or fall apart in terms of its functionality, sometimes it has to take and do that whole abruptness, and when it does that, how does it do that in relationship to working with the feminine?

Because the feminine only works from the standpoint of sustaining the good overallness. It only does that. It maintains almost that quality of an angelic praise of the Whole. The masculine is the one that comes in and sees that there’s something a little awry or lacking, and then tries to work with the feminine order and balance, to work at it in a very simplified way. But if it can’t do it in a simplified way, it has the ability to strike out and do something abruptly. And when it does that something abruptly, the feminine has no choice but then to have to try to pick up the pieces.

But even the feminine can lose its sense of self, because so much gets disturbed, should something like that happen. And you never know whether or not you’re going to crack something when you do something like that, and sometimes it has to be done because it’s going to break anyway.

I am seeing this aspect as my role to have gotten to the point where I can see the transgressions, and I know how they remain, and so I’m ashamed and embarrassed. It’s all I can do to show my face, because technically what the people are rejoicing and seeing, in terms of us, is not necessarily about what is apt to happen.

In other words, from my perspective they may want to take all that back before it’s over with, and the image of me is a little bit like you see when you come across a person whose eyes are darting about, and they can’t look you in the eye, and they’re holding back in some fashion. You know that they have some sort of reservation inside themselves.

In other words, they don’t quite buy the pitch, or the program of things, and you may think you have a deal or an arrangement or agreement, but when you see this disjointure coming across from them you know that something’s missing, and that something is going to be different than what you are anticipating.

And so it’s an image that’s like that. Something is going to be different. Something is apt to fall apart or break down, and I’m aware of the break down quality, and pondering what to do about that, but I don’t necessarily have a good answer because anything you do can make things worse.

And what exists now needs to declutter a little bit more, but is there sufficient time for it to declutter? It doesn’t require much time, but it does seem like it needs a little time in order for it to be done simply and graciously.

Will a certain imbalance that hasn’t been fixed, that can be approached by spreading this out and giving it more time so that a certain ordered, more gracious way can come through, and can come across, which takes time to do? Is there enough time for that to occur, or is this other that is a predicament, and a problem in the fabric of things, is this other going to break things up first? Is it going to get ahead?

This is this whole sense that I carry, and what’s interesting is the feminine order of things see me, or I see myself in the feminine order of things, as kind of in a spatiality that has an intentionality and an overallness, which is mandated to be as well. But then that mandate is subject to this other quality that I’m alone with, that can see how this whole thing can get contangled.

What I have to do is, and it’s against my better nature to do this, but I have to trust. And what I’m trusting in, I don’t have a lot of faith in. It has yet to prove to me that that works for them, because they’re missing this detail that I can see, and can that euphoria and all of that somehow or another wing it, or will this other slowly be like a virus, a slow disease of the body that will eventually win out?

So thus the predicament, and thus the dream. I’m measuring myself and going through this problem inside in relationship to having to look at a very, very particular characteristic in the Whole.

And [in your dream] you’re measuring yourself from the standpoint that, can you carry this overallness that you have caught up with? Can you carry it all the way through? Can you bring it all into the lower levels, from the higher levels all the way down and through?

Of course, what will stop you will be some detail or some aspect that hasn’t been cleared out that falls in the role of the masculine. That’s how those two come together. It’s not your responsibility to go out there and try to understand and deal and address that detail.

The three women when they came out were perfectly fine. That other aspect fell upon me, and so when I walked out, it felt like all the eyes were upon me, because I knew everything else was okay, but I’m not okay, and how do I do this? How can I even show my face?

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It’s In the Details

February 27, 2013 ~ d2k ~ Leave a comment

In today’s dream, John finds himself as the odd man out, being in a group with three other women. The women see, and represent, the Wholeness of the situation. The masculine sees, and represents, the particulars, or the details of things. A balance of both views is required to maintain the safety of the overall. Finding this balance is a huge struggle within each developing person. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: Well, my dream works with the particularity of something. In other words, you have the general motif, and I have the set responsibility.

And so the way it shows itself up is, I’m one of the four people who have the responsibility to ensure that the guidelines governing the workings of a body, which I am part of, have no conflicts of interest.

This body is composed, these inner workings, the inner responsibility is made up of three women and me. In other words, we’re like the higher order that makes sure that the will of the overall body is free and clear from any conflict in terms in terms of how it’s put together.

Because we have to be clear about this, and it’s very subtle at times, we tend to remain kind of in an inner sanctum within ourselves, so it’s considered an honor and a noble thing when we go out into the courtyard or something amongst the people. And the people are always excited to see us and will stand around waiting if we’re supposed to come out at some appointed time.

Our duty as the inner sanctum, the four of us, is to make sure that the fabric of the society is not only not affected by anyone with a presence that is not right, but also with an interest like in the Whole, an ownership interest or a place in the Whole that contaminates the overall freedom and flow and functionality.

The image is, I see us filing out to their welcome, and we’re going like in a lineup, and it’s kind of two women go first, and then there’s me, and then there is another woman. I’m the only guy, and I would have been perfectly happy, and would have preferred if it were possible to have stayed back and let the women come out, but that is not how it works. We are the leadership team.

So, we file out amongst the people and the crowd is ecstatic to see us, but I see myself cringing with embarrassment. I can hardly look anybody in the eye. I’m very, very self-conscious. These three women do not seem to be aware consciously of anything being askew, but I’m aware of it, and I do not feel worthy to be there and would prefer to hide.

I cannot look these people in the eye because, from my inner positioning of being able to see something from within, I see a problem in the way that the order of the body is put together, and it has to do with a type of ownership interest that conflicts with what we all deem responsible. In other words where there isn’t a contaminate that sits there at a deep inner level that prevents something from being as dynamic as it’s meant to be – and I’m aware of it.

But all the women don’t seem to be aware of it, because they don’t look at things that way. They’re looking at the overall energetic of how something needs to be in the Whole, but I’m aware of this undermining little component. And I see it as my responsibility, and my duty, to make sure that that’s not there – and it’s there. So I’m feeling so bad about this, it is all I can do to show my face.

I could see in the eyes of the people that they trust us explicitly, and are standing out there to greet us and honor us, which is how it’s meant to be. In other words, that’s how it’s set up to be. It works like that.

It’s an odd position to be in, because I know that the women are in the right space to be swept up in this coming together or communion with the people, but I’m not. I’m having an extremely hard time justifying just being there because of this guilt, or self-conscious, that I carry because what I know is sitting there.

It may not be a problem yet, but it has to be fixed or it will be, and it’s my role to have seen this, and I missed it, and there it is, affecting the overall system. So for as long as this remains an imbalance, I can’t do anything but see myself as holding back in this self-conscious embarrassment, restraint, and shame.

To come out before the people while this still exists to me is out of place, as if I’ve let everyone down, even though they don’t know it, don’t see it yet. That doesn’t matter; I see it and that is where it matters, in terms of my heart.

In writing what this is like, I write: the vibration is that I’m aware of an inner energetic imbalance that has to do with a detail regarding the order of things that has its aliveness, this detail, and that detail is such that it could destabilize the Whole.

But what’s awkward is, at this point in time, I seem to be alone in this. The three women comrades are amnesic to this. I mean, they don’t look at the detail and specifics of things. They look at how the overallness is and they tend to feel that they’re handling that.

I mean, this detail really, really bugs me. They’re okay, and the people are euphoric, and they have a right to be euphoric, and they’re carrying themselves as they need to carry themselves as they go out amongst the people. It’s just me that’s tenuous.

In other words, what I see is I can’t really look at them in the eyes, because I see the impending problem. In other words, I see that in between, and as long as it remains, I’m not able to be in a place that is able to merge, or to come through, in a way that connects like it’s meant to be.

In other words, if I’m able to put together a system and a process that flows, and this is very, very difficult and this is a problem that always exists when you have to function like this, is that you’re always rolling things around to see if you have it right.

In other words, this is tricky because you have to make huge shifts too, so you can’t get too caught up in the way something is, as a sense of overall feel to it. You can’t get too caught up in that, because you have to be cognizant of how this little thing can distort, or disrupt, or change the overallness – even though it hasn’t done that yet.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: It’s In the Details