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Posts Tagged ‘surrendering to god’

In today’s dreams, John explores two sides of a fundamental issue in life: connecting to things that haven’t yet been connected to, and realizing that aspects of our past may no longer serve us energetically. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: Well I was talking to J, I was telling him how I discovered how to have these meditation dreams, why something didn’t work yesterday, and then he explained to me why it didn’t work in terms of how I had been during the day.

Then I kind of pointed out that this stuff can happen anywhere from if I start meditating at 10:00pm or something I can come out of it anywhere from 11:30pm to 3 o’clock and the whole thing was more profound when I come out closer to 3 o’clock.

But somehow or another I inflect it inside. I felt the spark inside that when I said 11:30pm it was almost like I had tweaked something, but sure enough that’s when I came out of this is 11:30pm. And when I come out of this sort of thing later, it’s easier to pull out. It’s always hard to pull out because you have to be there for a longer period of time to catch up with it.

Anyway, what I wake up with from the meditation dream, is that I can tell that what I am seeing isn’t yet complete. In other words, maybe if I’d have dreamt more and whatnot I would have gotten it to more of a completeness, but it isn’t yet complete. And I know that I need to come back at another time to realize or catch up with the missing enfoldment, and when I do this I’ll be focusing and figuring out what it is that I need to take in to realize a completeness.

So what is missing is a connection to something I have yet to reach or experience. That’s the meditation dream. It’s a little bit esoteric.

What it means is I am in the precarious position of possibly having to contend with that which is not yet complete. I mean, that’s dangerous because how do you know how to cope then, because you haven’t pulled enough of it through to have any proper conscious comprehension.

And so if I don’t pull it through, in other words, if I’m not able to somehow or another figure out how to contend with that which isn’t yet complete, and instead fall into the precarious position mode, I won’t progress. What I’m seeing as an image is I’m not functional or complete with how I need to be, in terms of how I work with this aspect.

In other words, if I carried it deeper inside I could find it, but I came out at 11:30pm. I tweaked it. It’s almost as if I could predict I was going to come out of it at 11:30pm. I felt the inflection as I was describing this. In the meditation dream it’s almost like this counter reflection back was, pay close attention to what you dream about tonight.

In the dream there’s a huge barrier that I am able to see that looks like a sharp mountain peak that juts out into life. I see it as a problem for others, but it’s a nonexistent issue for me. It has no affect whatsoever upon me. And I see why it’s an issue for others.

In other words, it’s an issue for people that smoke, and I have never been a smoker, so I don’t have that kind of issue to contend with. That isn’t a barrier for me, and as a consequence for a smoker to be able to wake up they have to go through this huge process that I never would have to contend with because I never smoked, or they have to have their lungs pumped at least once a year or otherwise the aspect of the density of the smoking is overpowering to their being.

In other words it kills them. So I reflect about how ambivalent I am in that I can see this, I suddenly see this almost as if I had never noticed it before because it has no effect on me what all. And by noticing, I create a problem, a subtle one, but still I create a problem because now I start to wonder about something that I had never even given the foggiest thought about whatsoever and that is what about the ambient smoke from the atmosphere.

I’m taking it in even though I am not a smoker perhaps. That causes me to have to learn a little bit more about it so as I’m making my inquiries about such a barrier, which seems to be a major problem for people but is actually a non-issue for me, but still I am curious or something.

I found myself talking to a couple of people who are taking in, who are gathering up, and redistributing to others in need various books that they have acquired through kind of a donation process that exists. And they are packaging them up to send them out.

Each book seems to have an intended recipient. To begin with I kind of glance at these books, I find this to be an interesting process that’s going on so I glance at these books as they are being packaged into a box for shipping. I kind of find it very fascinating, the kids books that I glance at, because I know this is going to bring a lot of joy and happiness to the recipients at the other end.

These are smaller books, and they are written very simply and are going to be very easy to appreciate. Suddenly, right at the very end, almost as if you are almost topping the box off, is a very large book that gets placed in the box.

This book is a concise depiction of the collective works of Carl Jung, and brand new it sold at a price of $450. Then before it got donated it got marked down to $69.50, and then finally to $40. In seeing this, it’s like I realize that, wow here in one book it has concisely gathered up the essence of Carl Jung.

So when I see this then I’m thinking that I could take it in, because I know that ordinarily looking at Carl Jung in this way and that way can be a monumental undertaking, but this has a codify at its essence. I offer $69.50, and then I am told that the book has a home it is to go to, and another person who is there, because they could probably use the money to help get other books that can be distributed or something, said I could have it for $450.

I protest because I point out this is too much, that’s the new book price and when I’m offering to pay $69.50 this is still more than the $40 that it finally got marked down to before it was donated to them.

 And then I wake up.

The significance of the book is… I wrote this up because the book is significant and then the rest of the dream is important to. It’s in an area of an interest from my past. It’s therefore nice to have, although I doubt that I will ever need it for anything anymore.

This same feeling exists when I examine myself more closely in relationship to the sudden impulse that lurched out in terms of this Carl Jung thing. It’s as if like some sort of past flicker note gets hit by this, and to-the-point book that makes Carl Jung easy to assimilate but deep down I know I no longer need it, and do not have the time anymore, or the reason anymore to see if there’s anything that I may have missed or need to go back and refresh myself on or anything like that, as if I may have missed some need to know or something.

The meaning of the rest of the dream is I am noticing the state of free flow freedom that I have in an area that is a major problem for people in creation. This issue has no hold upon me whatsoever because I am not a smoker.

In other words, I am not tied up in this kind of limitation or density or barrier. So I do not have to contend with practices others have that are needed to help them contend with the issue. In other words, they have to look at the books and stuff like that. They have to try to go through the motions. They have to learn things.

I just have to make note that because I see this, I have to be careful because I can be affected by the ambient nature of just that as a sight even though I don’t carry the brunt of the issue. There is, however, nothing I need to know because vibrationally I carry a knowingness inside that is sufficient.

There is nothing there for me to review or discover. I came or am prepackaged, okay, I don’t have to go back through any of that. It’s in the past, even though in the present, because of the way things are in the dense outer I may not be seeing it as succinctly as I am inclined, because of the outer capacity nature of things in which you can have the little tangential gaps.

The deeper meaning is this is a dream that explains why it is that I cannot go back to what had been an energetic interest, not all that long ago, in my overall beingness because I have taken in all that I need in this capacity. I just need to be present with it.

To download this file, Right Click (for PCs) or Control Click (for Macs) and Save: Forth and Back

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John: In my dream, I’m attending the last class before a test.

It’s an accounting class and there’s a three-day weekend followed by the test. I show up knowing that nothing new is really going to be taught. It’s just going to be the professor laying out what the test is going to be, and perhaps establishing some ground rules, and maybe a slight review of things and hints that might make it easier to take the test.

Other than that, everything has already occurred and happened, so I’m just showing up; I’m going through the motions. I come into the area with my coat on and at first ponder whether I want to sit down. Then I notice that there’s a woman there who’s someone I remember from high school. I remember that she always takes this sort of thing seriously so, I figure, what the heck.

 At first I decide to sit behind her. Then I find that it’s better to sit up towards the front. I sit in a kind of triangular formation and I’m at the top of the triangle. As other people arrive, they all sit behind me.

The space we’re in is like an open, outdoor area; there’s grass and I’m sitting at the very top. In front of me there’s nothing but dirt and rock. I notice, off to my left, that people have their little indulgences in terms of how they have to carry or conduct themselves.

I notice for example that there’s a small, half-used container of fingernail polish. This is an affect of how people tend to see themselves but, in my particular case, I don’t really take any of it that seriously. It’s not why I’m actually there.

I’m there because it’s okay to be there and, at the same time, I’m able to notice that part of me is able to resonate in a particular, inner way. When I’m able to resonate in a particular inner way, I’m actually free of what’s going on around me. I’m able to observe and see everything that’s transpiring in a new way, so much so that I notice a shift, where I suddenly have access to a deeper space inside me that I didn’t know existed.

As I evaluate what’s going on, the only thing that makes any sense in terms of my presence, because I’m not there to figure anything out, is that I’m serving as a force that diffuses the indulgent energy of others. I have the idea that it’s important and necessary for me to be there.

Basically, I’m just there as a means of radiating how it doesn’t have to be. What’s going on around me is not as important as it’s made out to be. In my approach, I’m actually able to hold a better space in terms of who I am and, in doing so, things that are meant to open up can open up – if the intense, personal indulgences stop.

If I were to determine why it is that I’m free flowing through life like this, it’s to carry a mannerism, or a way of being, that enables others to be able to inflect slightly differently so that they don’t take things quite so seriously, or personally. In doing that, it enables them to see something more that wouldn’t otherwise be possible because they’re normally lost on some dense tangent caused by self-involvement.

The dream also has a deeper meaning, which is that by taking and holding and carrying a space that resonates inside me, what I’m really doing is aligning the bits and pieces of me that wouldn’t ordinarily be able to be aligned – if I had an indulgence that consumed me, as events in the outer are inclined to do.

The dream is quite similar to your dream (see A Natural Way) in that both dreams have to do with holding a space, or a place, within, from which something is able to open up.

In other words, it flows through us, and so our rapport in creation is changed. Instead of having to contend with the outer reflection of things, we’re actually able to touch, or be in cohesion with, the energy that perceives the indulgences and the limitations that are suggested by the impressions and the reflections.

So these images describe a state where we’re able to sit and go along for the ride, so to speak, but we’re free from all of it. In being able to be free from all of it, we’re able to align ourselves. But it’s more than that, too, because the process somehow takes away a seriousness, in terms of the outer, so that it too can come to know, and reach, a kind of higher meaning, and value, in terms of being. It’s an interesting dream about maintaining an inner space.

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John: So from your dream yesterday, and now into mine, the ongoing theme is about developing oneself to adjust according to what is unfolding (for yesterday’s discussion, see Another Dimension). That’s very different to the way most of us behave, because we are accustomed to always being headstrong and coming at life in a way that we imagine it’s supposed to be. That headstrong, ego-based approach is, of course, due to our cultural conditioning, i.e., personal experience, education, family life, and social norms.

My dream starts off with me having to contend a bit with my conditioning. The feeling I have is that I’m in a scenario that is far more than I’m used to experiencing. This is pushing my senses to an extreme, which is out of character in terms of how I normally see myself. There is a feeling in the dream that everything is over the top. In other words, my defense mechanisms actually make me think that I know what’s going on.   

The problem, however, is that how things are “supposed” to be, in the living organism of this universe, is actually dictated according to the flow. I am (we are all) more hardwired into this flow than I (we) care to realize. I’ve forgotten it because I have held onto my internal buffers.

These buffers are, of course, defense mechanisms, and without them I have to contend with the aliveness of life more directly. In the dream I saw that as so outrageous that it was unnerving. So it made me feel disoriented.

In the next dream a question was raised regarding what is to going happen. Someone asks the question in relationship to something in the outer: they ask, “Is the stock market going to go up or down?”

It’s like they’re taking a poll to see how different people react. Those who feel more defensive think the stock market is scary and could easily come crashing down. In other words, they fear they will get hurt.

I break through the issue by saying it’s going to go up. There are a whole group of people standing around (including your dad) who agree. But rather than just leaving it as a matter of opinion, it’s important to understand why it’s is going to go up, so I say that it’s determined by one thing: either the money supply – the supply of currency – is going to increase, which is inflationary, and will send the market up, or it’s going to decrease, which is deflationary, in which case the market is going to go down.

So what are these dreams really about? In both sets of images I’m examining how things are meant to unfold. To see things from that vantage point is to get away from personal involvement or personal opinion. I’m being shown that the safest path is to let go of feeling separate from it all, and instead get into the aliveness of the flow and see where it leads.

Of course aliveness here means everything that’s alive – taking into account all that exists – and of course separating out my personal desires, hopes, or hidden agendas, because those only serve to separate me from the flow and cause a hurt to my heart. Humans can’t steer the flow, they must go with it – they must be aligned to what it is doing.

When I try to contend with things separate from the flow of life, that’s when I hurt the heart. And of course when others try to do the same, they will hurt my heart as well. It may seem like human nature to try to direct things away from struggle and hurt – to always try to make things “safe,” but it’s more natural, and in keeping with the aliveness of everything in life, to be in tune with the rhythm. In so doing something from within can then be revealed.

In other words, something is trying to rise up, which means that there’s something hidden that is touching the veils that keep reality hidden from us. To develop, or utilize, the coping devices we have adopted is to hide behind the veil. In so doing, neither our process, nor the process of the universe works very well.

Perhaps another way of saying the same thing is that people try and create an environment that suits their self-image. That act is in contradiction to the flow, and actually causes a contraction in the heart. Anything that veers away from the inner flow of the whole leads to suffering; the inner flow of the whole comes down and touches us from above. Then our light awakens within the greater light and it’s able to rise back up.

The challenge is to take in everything without expectation or judgment, and to be able to flow with that. That puts us closer to the heart of the world and enables us to follow the will of the Creator at play.

The will of the Creator is behind everything in Creation. Access to this flow is not possible when we deceive ourselves in terms of what is really happening.

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