Posts Tagged ‘surrendering to our inner life’

i33geWe can think of sleep as a type of surrender because we basically hand ourselves over to a state of unconsciousness. And while we sleep our unconscious can speak to us in images that would be blocked while we’re awake. Surrendering to God or spirituality is similar: we must hand ourselves over to the care of what the universe (higher energies) wants for us – while we are awake – and listen for the guidance that can arrive in many forms. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

John: So my dream last night was classic in that it portrayed quite simply the vibratory effect that is associated with the inner flowing into the outer. Generally this understanding is rather esoteric and something a person might have a hard time grasping because they do not readily associate their attention in this way. When a person has their attention to the outer senses only, the discernment of inner into outer is a concept.

However, in the dream, I see myself proceeding in a crowd of people. When someone seeks to get past me, I am able to feel how their attention is able to inhibit my movement. It is as if they are able to touch and grab me energetically somehow. This is an outer sensation.

I also am able to experience this effect based upon my understanding of what colors mean. I mean it’s an outer sensation, but if you knew how to listen to the outer sensation correctly, you would realize that there’s an inner effect in that. And so in the way I am dreaming this here I actually see it as an inner sensation. It’s easy to say that it’s an outer sensation, looking at it in a lower way, but from the perspective that I am in, I see it as an inner sensation. In other words, when you’re traveling in God you see it as an inner sensation, and when you’re traveling towards God, or away from God, it’s all an outer sensation.

So here’s another one. I also am able to experience this effect based upon my understanding of what colors mean. For example, the higher-self colors such as green, blue, indigo, and violet are able to have their way with the more dense and earthly color, say, red. In other words, you can tell that there is a flow there even though it’s subtle, but there is a flow. In other words, it has its way, so to speak, in that you can discern the innerness of that, of the information that is housed in that connectivity of what is in that form of light.

Another way I am able to recognize this happening is when I struggle to move in a dream. If I stop and look at the images closely, I will notice that vibratorally I am focusing upon a denser vibration I’m trying to speed up, as my focus and attention is more keenly relating to a subtler energetic effect. In other words, I’m allowing this inner to touch me as I effectuate the outer to try to get it to speed up. The subtler the effect, the more inner it is.

In this way a person is able to tell within themselves using a basic understanding and perception of the inner into outer. Of course maybe I have dreamt enough that it has become second nature to recognize the pattern with respect to how things repeat and repeat, such that when I have a dream that has a natural progressive effect to it, that I am able to recognize the effect of an inner into outer by understanding the chakras and that the denser energy is slower, and that the higher-self colors are a faster flow.

The harder part to this process to own and acknowledge from the understanding of the principle of flow, is how this relates to karma. Those who do understand this know that they enhance a consciousness. In other words, these principles of light are the colors of things and enhance a consciousness and groundedness in manifestation, if you surrender, if you can surrender then to the denser energy. See, this is inner coming into outer. You have got to surrender it to the dense energy. You can’t just stay in a transcendent and aloof state.

And therefore you force yourself to hear and see in this way, rather than project and use the effect of the inner flow from subtler energies and higher color light, to impose a personal will. Or in other words to try to manipulate or take that and use that in a way that has its personal prerogative in the lower-self, or the denser nature. To be a servant of the servants you have to have a surrendered consciousness and emptiness such that you never take advantage of a situation. So whenever you feel compelled to push the bubble, you catch yourself and hold the inner flow energetic in check.

In other words, you don’t use it to your advantage, and let the outer appear to have its way. In this way a person is keeping their feet on the ground. However, even the principles of thought and such that the person is inclined to adhere to comes across more as a gracious and humble mannerism, because deep within it is said although in the outer this is subtle and generally goes unnoticed, that this is a consciousness, i.e., head, that is in the clouds and in the heavens. In other words, there’s a part that’s feet on the ground, and then there’s this part that is circulating and percolating inside, that is there that you recognize and acknowledge, but you can’t use as an exclusiveness. You have to adhere to the outer, because you’re in the outer. So your head’s in the clouds or in the heaven, or however you would say that, even though your feet are on the ground and you’re allowing yourself to be effected by the outer conditions – even though you know that that’s illusory.

And this keeps progressing to steps of traveling in a type of God, so to speak. So when you truly grasp the inner into outer concept, and honor the will of God as being something subtler than our lower-self nature, a human being gets out of the way by making one’s self as small as possible, in other words, not as loud like everybody else out there.

By being really small such that everything outwardly can have its way with you, or us, or however you want to say it, and of course this is a type of so to speak way of saying it, from an outer sensation we are trusting in the inner to be that which is real by letting it flow through us -without trying to manipulate it for personal edification.

Such emptiness is practicing the art of being totally vulnerable and completely subjective so that, from the perspective of the outer, the inner inflections are suddenly visible and the veils we project fall away. That is impossible, of course, as long as you have some reaction or mannerism in the way.

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digital-art-work-the-core-of-unionIt is a fundamental of current human life that we are always seeking answers outside ourselves. Yet the truth is, all the answers are found within. Here, Jeane’s dream triggers a discussion of this aspect, causing John to wonder: Who is willing to do that? (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: It felt like last night I was struggling to measure, or regulate something, and in that struggle I’m kind of dialoging with somebody else and we’re not doing a very good job of whatever we’re trying to control, or regulate, or monitor, or whatever. 

And then I know about this machine I guess that’s out on the market that will measure and average part of what we’re trying to regulate, and in doing so that calms it down somewhat. 

So it feels like I go get this machine, and then by taking an average of what it’s measuring and whatever and paying attention to it, it feels like it calms it down somewhat, but it isn’t really doing as much maybe as what the other person thinks it’s doing. It just seems like a step that one can take, but it’s not really the solution.

And that’s the best I can describe the dreaming. I don’t remember much else.

John: Yeah, that’s because what happened is, is you resorted to this machine for a type of satisfaction, or solution purposes, instead of resorting and going to a depth inside yourself where the answers actually exist.

In other words, everything that is occurring we can reach or touch at some depth inside of ourself, but who can do that? Because very few people can go into that core of their being to such a degree to where they access the sort of stuff that’s embedded in their being.

All of history is imbedded in your being. Everything is imbedded there. The dilemma is that it’s dense; it’s a very dense trait that’s imbedded there. Why do they say it’s dense? Well, it’s repressed. Why do they say it’s repressed? Well, it’s something that’s extremely compacted. 

Why is it extremely compacted? Well, it is in this way that magnetism is created in terms of creation, and it is this magnetic state that we have a relationship with when we’re in a physical body.

Everyone goes through life and they try to find an easy way to make things work, and so they try to find machines that can do this for them, machines that can do that for them, especially when it comes to issues of health, or the issues of trying to understand what is going on in terms of the chemistry that they don’t understand.

They carry this very complex human condition body and whatnot and it has things about it that we can barely grasp. I mean, we understand certain things, but there are other things that we don’t have a handle on, and can’t grasp.

And, as a consequence, to pacify our psyche, we resort to answers or resolutions that come from outside sources. And what your dream is basically doing, is that there is something about accessing this outside source that isn’t giving you quite the satisfaction that it’s supposed to give you.

And the reason why it’s not giving you the satisfaction it is supposed to be giving you, is that some part deep, deep, deep inside of you, you know you already can access this generically, or it can come from an inner depth that you’re able to reach. There’s no shortcut to it.

In other words, this inner depth is not something that you noodle around the edges on, and try to figure out how to stay light and skim away from it. You have to experience it. You have to go into it. 

And those who can go into it can then see things about life that are not otherwise possible. Everyone kind of knows this maybe. I suppose if you’re on a certain spiritual path that you have to go into the depths of your being, but I think they give that lip service, primarily because as you explore a certain part, or aspect, of your makeup and you’re being, and you come to know some of the inner nuances of yourself that have been repressed or hidden or have been carried for a long, long time, you then look for an easy way out.

That condition still seems to continually predominate, and so you look around for shortcuts, easier answers, and of course to a certain degree those easier answers and such can become even a bit more accessible, or so it seems, because you have a greater consciousness that can take in a bigger schematic and picture in the overall. Overall meaning a better grasp of the macrocosm.

But if you’re in a human body, you grasp it through the microcosm. You grasp it through the depths of yourself. That’s why the sight that you have, where does this come from? Does it come from scaling some sort of heights in terms of a grasp of things in a bigger schematic scheme of things that you aspire to unravel?

Does that sight come from that? Actually, it bleeds out. It just goes out and out and out until it just filters out and becomes poof, it just ethers out on you. The sight comes from this deep, deep depth of your inner being, that was kind of painful actually, yet you carry it and you don’t want to feel that pain, so you look for the shortcuts to spiral out on.

What ends up happening is that actually becomes boring, those shortcuts become boring. Those shortcuts actually become something that doesn’t really fulfill. Those shortcuts become something that doesn’t actually give you the answer that you need to have.

So you have this huge dilemma. You need this much, much deeper answer, and you have to go about finding this deeper answer by accessing something imbedded at a deep, deep depth within. What kind of deep, deep depth within is this?

Well, what does it kind of look like? Well, it has your defense mechanisms in there, it has all of your darkness in there, it has all of those qualities, and within that is something you have evolved, and if you can go back into that, through the past, you see the future. Through the past you see what is, through the past you recognize what is important.

But if you only stay in the present, and you skim along, and you use the modern techniques and technologies of your consciousness as it’s evolved, you stay on the surface of things. And you may learn to have a little better life, that you can choose, but you’ve carefully extracted yourself away from those aspects of yourself that you consider toxic, a denseness that is toxic.

If you actually could take and you could go into that which is toxic, without becoming strange in the head, and strange in your reactions, in other words crack or flip out, if you could actually go into and look at this, you would be coming to the core of how it is, and why it is, that you are the way you are. 

In other words, the chemistry upon which you have been put together, you’ll come to the core of that. No one wants to do that. They like to be shown, and taught, and have things presented to them. And the kind of answers that have to do with going into the depths of yourself is like going backwards.

You always want to keep going forward, trying to find the lightness of things, but there is no going forward. There really is no going backwards, either. You have to hold the whole state of all of that, and therein lies the emptiness.

But if your propensity is to place your attention upon that which gives you a certain degree of comfort, or satisfaction, then you find yourself getting over the top and shallow. And if your attention is placed upon just pure suffering, just for suffering sake, you can find yourself so condensed, and so tied up in knots, that you’re kind of dumb in another way.

You heard this kind of echo where you didn’t want to accept the modern system of things, and so what are you left with? Going backwards into some sort of depth? You actually do solve things when you do that, but who can do that?

We always think we need to spin, but we are, at our core, a type of silence. And in that silence is this greater Whole capacity, which includes this whole aspect of something that is very, very dense as well. But if we’re spiraling out, and we’re using our certain energetic to spiral out, then we’re setting ourselves up for an equal and corresponding reaction in the other direction, which has to do with going into a type of pain and density.

So, who can take and hold a state of quietness and function from that? Because if you function with a level of excitement, in relationship to things as they’re coming together, then you can’t help but be going outside of your balance.

So how do you take and pull it together at an inner depth inside of yourself, without suffering, if you’re doing the other that reaches outward for its level of perceived balance? You can’t. You yo-yo.

So you have to find that core that’s still. What your dream was basically showing you is that in the doingness of things you have your ideas, and you go outside of yourself to try to resolve them.

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In a spiritual journey, the process of letting go of our established patterns, mannerisms, fears, or defense mechanisms is crucial to our ability to be in the flow of creation. In Jeane’s dream sequence, we see her trying to make a journey, or a shift to something new. But to make that shift, she must leave unnecessary baggage behind. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)

Jeane: I remember one dream, and it feels like I’m going to have to travel with a couple other people, one of whom is a slender, young woman. And the way we choose to travel is that we have this animal that looks almost like a camel with a longer, flatter back, so the three of us can ride on it.

The girl particularly is kind of nervous; even the camel is not certain sometimes – whatever this animal is. At one point we get to this area where it’s almost like we have to walk over a fairly thin piece of land that even has some crevices in it, and everything has fallen away on several slides ,and there are about three segments of it.

The camel may have to get across almost with a little jump or something, and everybody is a little nervous about it, even the camel is a little nervous about getting across. So there’s all this maneuvering to kind of stay on, or maybe even one or two get off for a while to see if we’re going to make it. And then we’re going to have to get from this strange looking piece of land over to the mainland, so to speak, with a little jump.

Well, the girl, then, she’s suddenly uncertain because the outfit she’s wearing is a little short, and she’s uncertain she can actually ride this camel and get off it and look dignified because maybe she doesn’t have any underpants on or something like that. I try different things. I finally end up picking her up and carrying her, and getting the camel to kind of jump over to the other side.

Then, because I’m carrying her and I realize what her dilemma is because she wants to feel modest or whatever, I search around in my mind and it must be a time before they had invented those clothes where you have like a dress that goes over pants. I’m figuring I have to get to a village and I guess we’re going to invent that then. We are going to get her some silk pants that come down like they do in India, you know, like down to your knees or whatever that you wear under a dress, so she can feel like she can travel and things like that.

John: What’s interesting in the dream is that, because this is a dream in which you are transitioning from a place where you had been to a new place, what’s interesting about it is that you’re not doing it alone.

It’s like you have these other parts of you, and I guess you’re including these other parts of you in order to help to facilitate and make a point. And the point is that, part of making this adventure across, you have to let go of appearances in terms of whether it’s right, or not right.

It was kind of like the odd thing that I did when it was raining out and I just took half the bed with me to keep from getting wet, you know, this huge blanket and everything, putting the towel over my head, which looked probably pretty strange to someone looking at it, but whatever it was that had happened that night had taken me out of my normal demeanor, where you just don’t do that.

It was like I kind of got to a point where I just didn’t give a shit, because whatever it was that was affecting me from that dream had put me into a state or a place in which what was important was facilitating the continuation of the process and not the appearances.

Ordinarily you would be wet and you would dry out and maybe be uncomfortable or uneasy or cold or who knows what, and in this particular case, rather than have that interfere or in the way, potentially, as something that could be a distraction, I just dropped all appearances, because that was an aspect of appearances.

Well, in your transitioning or shifting across in this journey that you’re taking, you’re looking for a new set of clothes or tools, a new way, a new way of being. Of course, you’re shifting into something that’s new. It’s taking a little effort to go across, and you’re not certain of course of the vehicle or whether the vehicle is going to get you across – this strange looking camel. You’re not sure just what it is that you’re going to find over there. You’re just doing it.

You have your uncertainties as well as issues that have to do with a bit of the way you need to carry yourself or something in terms of doing this. So your dream is just like giving you a report, the report being what possibly sits there as issues in terms of this sort of transitioning.

In other words, the question about whether the camel is the right way, and this is going to be kind of difficult in some fashion, and then the appearances – are you dressed properly – are all the necessary aspects of a type of appearance mannerism. Just showing what there is that still is kind of noodling around in your nature, although you’re still doing it. In other words, these are just like the little vagaries that one carries.

Jeane: I don’t know if this was another dream, or if it was how that dream began, but I remember being in a house, and there’s at least maybe two parts that are going with me and they feel younger, and then a woman who runs the house.

And it feels as we prepare for a journey, I keep going to the kitchen, and I’m trying to go out to the Jeep we’re going to travel in, and make sure we have our food and everything else right.

Then I find out that the woman who’s in charge of the house isn’t going with us, and actually it doesn’t feel like we really wanted her to go, but we thought she was. Then we find out she’s not going, and it suddenly frees things up – like then you don’t have to go pack the Jeep in as prepared a way, I think.

You know what I mean? It’s kind of like if a parent is going sometimes they have their whole agenda and list you have to check off, but if you’re just going, let’s say the younger set, you can just grab this and that and kind of take off. So it kind of frees something up when we think we’re going, but then I think the Jeep turns into the camel.

John: This thing that you’re talking about, it’s interesting you’re able to pull it out.

Well, in this particular instance what you’re describing in your dream, is that you’re having to let go or leave behind. In other words, this is like a higher octave of the appearances. You’re having to let go and leave behind those aspects or parts of yourself that you normally feel you have to carry around with you – because they are part of you.

In other words, in order to take this step you have to let go and go into an emptiness or a nothingness where you don’t have anything that you are putting your attention upon as essentials. Normally whenever we do something we always have our essentials, whether it’s a jacket or clothes on. We always have our essentials.

Well, at the very epicenter of this journey, or shift to something new, you have to drop all of that.

And so the grandmother or whatever it is that normally comes along, in this particular instance, is not necessarily a deeper part of you, as it would usually be. It’s more like a part of you where you are caught up in ideas of responsibilities, and idiosyncrasies, that have to be taken into account before you can do any kind of shift.

In this particular case all of that has to be dropped so that you’re in an emptiness. And you can use that state of quietness, and the energy that surges there, in order to shift across. That’s what is at the basis of being able to take the step, and then your second dream takes and relates to the fact that you still now have the lower octaves of appearances and such that as you’re making the shift, that haven’t been completely let go of, still malingering with their qualms. But nevertheless apparently not so loud, and not so controlling, as to keep you from making this transition into this new space.

Jeane: Then I think right before I woke up I had a brief dream, and all I really remember about it is I seem to be at the house of some people I know that have certain leadership qualities. But they also have patterns I don’t trust at all – for good reason.

And within the house, and out in the backyard, it’s almost like they’re having a picnic or a gathering or whatever; there are people around. But there’s a point when everybody is supposed to settle and meditate, and I’ve gone over to a rock to sit there, but then I’ve also got my eye on the couple that are like the leaders. Because I feel like I have to keep my eye on him, and other things that seem to go on there, I never do seem to be able to meditate.

John: You have to put this part of the dream into the context of the two that came before. And so in the primary dream, where you went across to the other side, you still had your little nuances. And because you still carried those little nuances, you actually carried those across to the other side. But they don’t belong to the other side; they function as a kind of contaminant.

So you can’t quite own that space and, as a consequence, you still have something that you carry that is like a mannerism, and responsibility, in your way of being that hasn’t been dropped. And so you are still feeling that you have to keep your eye on this, or you have to sustain something like this. And the problem is, you don’t.

And you’re feeling, in this dream, the degree of focus and attention that this takes away from you, from another space that is also possible and is meant to be there, and you’re realizing that this is compromising that to some degree. So it’s kind of like you’re in a watching mode, of noting that as you have taken – as shown in the other dreams  – and created a shift across, first you let go sufficiently enough to be able to have the emptiness to be able to be light enough in terms of what you were carrying, to be able to acceptably take the step across.

But even as you took the step across, you still carried certain appearance issues and whatnot, and certain equivocations as to whether this was quite right or not. You weren’t completely sure. And the degree to which you carried that still had an effect upon the space, in that it now manifests as having to keep your eye on something, to a type of lack of total freedom, which you could have had, had you dropped absolutely everything and made the step across.

But because you still have a little yet to have to contend with, you’re finding yourself having to factor that in, which was part of keeping your eye on this guy or something else that is going on there, and that takes away from this greater dimension inside of you, that you know is meant to be a part of the space that you’re shifting into.

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