It seems shocking to realize that all the spiritual and religious pathways that have been available to humans, in the many thousands of years, are only partial truths. They are guideposts, and blueprints, to embarking on the journey, but they are really not the journey. The journey is within us, and can only be done from within us, because each of us has to overcome a different set of obstacles, unique to us, to make the journey. So it is not possible that two lives could do it in exactly the same way. To think otherwise is to not understand what is being asked of us. (At the end of this post there are instructions and a link to download this recording to your computer.)
John: Now, there is something that is unsettling, very subtly unsettling, to have to approach the subject matter of consciousness by talking about abstract things such as dhikrs, and holy names, and sounds, and prayers.
And the reason why I feel it is like that is because deep, deep down inside, once upon a long time, I saw the wholeness of everything – and I didn’t really appreciate it. I didn’t even know what I was necessarily looking at. And when I went away from that it was like being discombobulated, or taken apart, the nuts and bolts and everything were disassembled. And the price that has to be paid is to put that all back together again
And the process upon which that gets put back together is not readily given to you. You’re shown this, and you’re shown that. The understanding of the nuts and bolts is there, but you have to catch up with that for yourself. When it wasn’t properly regarded, and appreciated, and taken into account, you just don’t take and flip the page and go all the way back to score one again. Now comes the process of having to reconcile your way back, because it is a discovery of the missing nuts and bolts. One’s connectedness; it’s a discovery of that all on one’s own.
So this quality of having to reach to and access that which was lost, that one has to find on their own, that some part of one’s self deep, deep, deep inside knows about, but you don’t just flip the page and it’s handed to you again. You have to crawl your way back. There’s no shortcuts that are there. This is what this next dream is about.
And so, in my dream, I have an object that I am told has good value, and that this is an object that others will want and they will have a use for. The item has been taken apart by a person who has, as a business, this means of dissembling things. He is the one who tells me that what I have has good value and it is something that others want.
I saw it before it was taken apart, and, although it looked interesting to me, it was like a machine or something that I’m not really familiar with. The person who took it apart has issues with me, although he was amenable to taking the object apart so that it could be stored, or transported, retained and maintained in other words, he will not let me have the nuts and bolts that he took out to break it into its various pieces. He won’t let me have the sack of the nuts and bolts, that came out of this object, that I need if I am to try to put it back together again.
So in trying to get him to turn them over to me just makes him volatile. I mean he was perfectly fine demeanor taking it apart. He gladly helped doing that, but if I were to keep pushing him to knock it off, just hand me that so I can put it together, now that I am aware that this is something of value and of interest to people; I mean that’s rude, from his opinion, somehow. I don’t understand why he feels it’s rude, but it’s rude, and he just won’t do it. In fact, he’ll fight me over the idea if I keep it up.
Because I’m not readily familiar with the workings of this object, for it to be apart like this takes away my ability to do justice in selling it to others. I’m not inclined to do what it takes to reconstruct from scratch, so it creates a kind of giving up, or loss of value or appreciation, because if the nuts and bolts are readily there, then I can just do it, but they’re not readily there. And yet I know I can find them, or it can be done, in terms of putting it back together. In other words, it’s just not going to be cut and dry because I’m going to have to go out and get new nuts and bolts to do this.
And then I will be able to see what it is, and appreciate what it is, that he tells me is something that has great value and demand. Otherwise, it’s just a kind of a concept that I could easily disregard. I could be lazy, and not do it, and disregard it.
The meaning is, is I have a memory of an aspect of myself that was once complete. I remember seeing it complete, but this was not something I paid much attention. I noticed it at the time and, you could say, I kind of took it for granted.
Fast forwarding now to the way things are today, it takes awhile to have the adab and the character or whatever is necessary. So just knowing the importance and value is enough, now, for me to go out and seek to find the nuts and bolts on my own. And he knows I can do it, but given the karma of the past a process has to be followed. In other words, he can’t just lift a finger and make it easier for me.
Another aspect of the meaning is, letting go to an attendant stillness is important. It’s important because I need this to go back into life. Because I wasn’t properly being myself in the outer, I was deconstructed. I now believe I am able to recognize that value and importance. To prove it, I am on my own in accessing the nuts and bolts that are needed. I mean, I already have them, but I just have to access them in a more responsible and focused way.
These elements are not going to be readily given to me. In other words, it’s not like maybe when I was first created, let’s say an Adam and Eve scenario, where it was just all handed and I didn’t know what I had, so it’s not just readily there again no matter how much I may insist, or beg, or whatever it is type of righteousness. There is a price that has to be paid from having not utilized, or properly valued, and lived, what was once mine. I must now become worthy. There is a grievance about this that is like a malingering stigma. It can be overcome, but the process will require a deep inner commitment, and effort, that I need to find within.
And the deeper meaning is, this explains why, you know in the outer, this explains why it is that teachers only go so far. A teacher will describe the situation, in other words, give you techniques and stuff that kind of hint towards the situation, can even elaborate about its importance. And what we understand, of course, is always kind of misconstrued because we need to access, with a letting go stillness, that which is an overall wholeness.
In other words, it’s up to us to access what puts ourselves back together again, as a oneness. The teacher can know, and can actually even be holding onto, the nuts and bolts of our beingness, which means that we are in some fashion holding onto the nuts and bolts of our beingness, but are disenfranchised from them. But it’s not totally lost because we have been there. We have been in a state of wholeness before and self-destructed, or deconstructed, on purpose from that wholeness back to a prima materia outer and the myriad of things in which a discombobulation exists.
The challenge has thus become: can one then overcome the mayhem, and reach within, and access what was always there, has always been there, has never been lost, it’s just hidden. That is the issue before me now. There are no shortcuts. I need to quit acting like it can simply be handed over, which is the wrong attitude, because in that attitude you’re disturbing and insulting the intelligence of the greater teacher, which is life.
So what is needed is acceptance, graciousness, and a more natural inner peace that isn’t ladled with demands and expectations. When I’m able to be like that, what I readily need will make itself known, or be provided to me. It’s interesting isn’t it?
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